Redhawk Caldera you promised that you'd never leave

Eljay sniffled, feeling pathetic even as Raven and daddy told him that he wasn't a bother and that they just wanted him to be happy. He knew that he was a bother right now: taking up their time, their food, and making them worried because he wasn't happy when he should be trying harder to be. He was just done with hurting those around him, and he wanted it to stop so badly. It was as if the pain he felt in his heart would never go away, as if death would be more merciful than living on the way he did, and then daddy could move on, too, and so could Liffey and Lagan, because none of them would have to worry about Eljay anymore. It would be better for everyone, perhaps, if he wasn't here anymore; or maybe if he had never been born, or if his parents would have had a better child instead.

To Raven's question, he looked at his own paws and replied a murmured, "No." He was just feeling kind of spaced out and dizzy, but he didn't remember hitting anything when he fell.