King Elk Forest Salt and Pepper

Working towards her trades! I think for trades Gracious will turn out to be a counselor and naturalist. Stargazing for a starter, open to anyone!

The mountain of a woman had settled herself onto a high ledge of a carved rock that stood silently in an open part of the forest. The moon provided a quiet and illuminated atmosphere of tranquility and peace, it's pale light gave a silver lining to Gracious' large figure. While it was not snowing, the ground beneath her was cold and crunchy, the dusting of light snow was complete. However, the lack of sun allowed the snow to stay where it lay in peace. Her breaths billowed from her mouth like smoke from a dragon's mouth, wrapping around her lips and muzzle. With her head pointed towards the sky, pale diamonds scanned the star patterns she could make.

Thankfully the night was clear, the snow clouds had been blown towards the east, clearing the view. She couldn't be happier. The night was cold, of course, but the company of the moon and the stars kept Gracious from feeling the chill of the light breezes that blew through the dusted trees. All was at peace, not even the wind's quiet howls disrupted the lone figure in her moment.

brienne is very jealous of other counselors because blah blah we have so many blah blah i was here first, but she's pitiful and broken and needs counseling.  sorry!

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she felt at night as if she could escape the relative safety of her den.  during the day she festered, rotting inside and out while tindome swelled around her.  but there was something quiet about night that led her to peel away from the dirt and stone and wander out into the open.

it was a beautiful night.  trembling, she made her way up and up and up, pausing once and a while because since her return to tindome she had not fed herself.  starved and infected, she finally made her way to one of the highest points of the king elk forest.

but she'd been beaten there.  silvery pelage sits atop a rock, and honestly she believes it to be mato.  it was just like the first night they had spent together under the stars, where looking back on it, she believes she first fell for him.

how cruel.

she chokes, audibly, her legs tremble and buckle underneath her as she tries to leave.  so she lays instead broken in the snow.  maybe he won't notice her.  maybe she'll stay here and let herself freeze to death.

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no worries! I feel the feels will be strong in this thread ;-;

Her night seemed quiet and tranquil as if she was in her own little world just existing and breathing. A life with such pleasantries would be an enjoyable one, it was like an alternate world Gracious often let her head return to. In a sense, Gracious' imagination and dreams kept her alive-- they reminded her that there was good in the world, they reminded her that she had the power to change what she wanted, they reminded her that she had the right to enjoy her life. And that's exactly what she intended on doing so long as she breathed.

It wasn't until the sound of someone made her flick both ears back. It wasn't the sound of a yip or howl or even a bark, it sounded like the sound of someone nearly about to sob, as if their heart was ripping in two. Swinging her head around, Gracious looked to see who was behind her. Originally, she saw nothing until she lowered her gaze just a bit and locked her starry eyes on the figure below her. Wasn't that the same woman she was with when they met the other wolf at the borders the other day? She was sure it was the same, but perhaps further investigation would be needed. 

But the time to be logical could happen later. Right now, Gracious sensed something was wrong with the wolf in front of her and she needed to do something about it. Standing up swiftly, the misty woman lept off her rock and landed into the fresh coat of snow before trudging her way over the lady. "Are you alright, miss?" she asks her in a fluid and soft tone, coming a little closer to nudge her shoulder gently with her nose.

a soft voice cut through the chilly evening air and hung there for brienne to see plainly — this was not the silvery prince she had hoped (and dreaded) it would be.  instead, it was the woman who had witnessed her at the borders being so cruel to another at the borders.  because of course it was, right?

she fumbled with a response, but nothing seemed appropriate.  it was easy to see at first glance that brienne was decidedly not okay.  the limp in her hind leg had persisted and the wounds that scraped deep into her sides oozed with each breath even with zada's secret care.  her hips were easily visible even underneath her sparse winter pelt.  she looked terrible, and she felt terrible, too.

but she couldn't just _tell everyone_ that it was their leader who had turned her into whatever creature she was now.

no.  it was the only thing that she could bring herself to say.  i'm not.  but i'm not sure if it's appropriate.  please give me permission.

The lack of muscles on the small-framed lady made gracious feel concerned for her health. She was no medic by any means, but she knew the difference between being a good weight and being underweight. Gracious felt all kinds of red flags go up in her head when she laid her eyes on Brienne. And hearing her response didn't help either, the tundra woman felt her heart nearly shatter at the broken sight before her. She wanted to go and hunt for her, to just bring back a fresh kill and just make her eat. it would make Gracious feel better no doubt, but how would that affect the lithe female?

She knew nothing of what happened to her or who she was, but Gracious' empathy for others got kicked into high gear. She needed to offer help in any way she could, even if it was in the simplest ways of just having the other just vent. Gracious tenderly sat down next to her, her posture informal as she leaned forward and down to look at thesandy-coated woman. "Appropriate or not, I will not care. Speak, I will listen to everything you say." Gracious knew she wanted to help others, but she didn't think it would happen so soon when she joined.

it is funny that the white-cloaked woman said she didn't care.  in a way, she reminds brienne of how she was before the incident, back when she had life and love and a soul.

but she doesn't know if she trusts her.  he cannot find out.  it is a demand even though it escapes her lips strained and breathy.

and it's a long story.  she trembled, gathering her breath.

i was a founding member for tindome.  i was, actually, the first recruit.  i traveled with mato to find this forest.

i was in love.  i used to be such a kind person.

as winter drew near, our numbers were getting dangerously low.  we were worried, but we had each other.  we became husband and wife.

and one day, as i traveled outside the borders, i was captured.  i was away for maybe a month.  i don't know.  i came back and was met at the borders like a stranger.

he was exceptionally cruel to me.  he did not seem to think it was a stretch for me to have just left like everyone else did.  no matter how much i loved him.

he has hurt me.  and all i want to do is be over it, to move on, but he is here and he is angry with me for disappearing.  and i do not ask for his love.  because i don't —

she chokes. i don't think he ever loved me.  not like i loved him.  i don't think he's capable.

but i do want to be able to live in peace.  i'm suffocating.  he has created this.

ooc: phone post, finals just ended so sorry for the holdup!

“I won’t tell a soul” she reassured her in her silvery voice before quieting down to listen.

Her voice sounds broken, her heart seems shattered, her very being seems distant, as if her heart and souls are somewhere else rather than inside her body. Gracious feels sadness well up in her; this poor woman only desires peace yet she feels as if she’s suffocating. How dreadful, how painful, how intolerable— one would rip out their own eyes sometimes if put under such conditions. She was glad such a thing hasn’t happened yet.

“I’m sure this is an answer that you don’t want to hear,” Gracious said quietly, “but I think you need to talk to him about your pain. Talk to him about what happened, clear the air” she suggested to her. Talking about touchy things was already difficult as it was, but for Brienne’s case, it would be much more difficult than the average conversation. “Stowing your emotions away and avoiding him will make this only harder for you. You deserve to be happy and at peace, and the only way you can do that is by letting everything out.” 

“A broken heart needs time to heal, I believe that you should take time to heal yourself. Take some days to rest, clear your head,” she offered. “As for your love and his love...” she trailed off, her eyes darting to her paws just for a second. “If you believe it was one-sided, then I would let him go.”  

“Love is something that’s exciting at first; it’s passionate and fiery and addicting. But love is delicate, it depends on the strength of the relationship, about loyalty to one another and having a sense of family and connection. If he truly loved you, he wouldn’t have made you into the broken woman you are now, he would’ve welcomed you with open arms.”

it was something she had considered — talking to him — but the silvery prince had been so distant lately that she wondered if she could find him if she tried.  he'd been avoiding her too, right?

she nods in admission of gracious' statements.  its true.  it's all true.  

i understand.  and i'm trying.  you know, i'm supposed to be the counselor here.  not that we can't share — that's not what i mean.  i just — i used to be such a good, sweet person.  and now i'm catching myself like this she looks down at the snow, ears back and eyes wide like she's horrified by what she's become.

i am supposed to live with him as my alpha.  and i don't know if i can.  but they've accused me of abandoning them once already.  i'm not sure if i can do that, either.

Gracious did her best to not give the woman a pitiful expression. She was above being pitied, she just needed some help is all. And that’s what Gracious intended on doing, helping her. With Brienne’s lament about what kind of wolf she has become, Gracious stepped forward to gently bump her nose against the other’s shoulder in a gentle and almost motherly way.

”What you have become is not what you will be forever,” she said to her reassuringly, “you’re still the good woman you used to be, Brienne. You might not be the same as before, but perhaps after this, you’ll be even better.”

A thoughtful expression covered Gracious’s visage as she pondered on an idea to help her friend. Was it strange to consider the woman a friend of hers? Although the two have barely exchanged words, it seems like the two of them had at least connected on a more personal level. That, to Gracious, was more than enough to make her a friend to the mountain woman. “While you are in such a tough spot, I’m afraid there is no good answer that’ll please you completely. What I suggest is to reconnect with everyone, try to rebuild your relationships with them, then perhaps, they will let go of their angry feelings towards you.” Gracious lacked the seniority Brienne had, she didn’t know what the others felt about the little lady, but she hoped everything would grow better.

”If all fails, then both heaven and I know you tried. You’ve started at the bottom, my friend, now you can only go back up.” The mountain woman cast her eyes back up towards he sky as she could see something fly by quickly. “Maybe make a wish, as childish as it sounds, any sort of luck is better than none” she said in a spiritual and light way.

where my notification for this at doe?? sorry!

it was exactly what she needed to rally, this strange tenderness.  in this moment she realizes this is what she has done for others, and what she must do again.

thank you.  it's scarcely a whisper but in the crisp, quiet air between them it's audible.  you're right.  i'm.  i'm sorry, for being like this.  but you're right.

she laughs, genuinely, laying beside the silvery woman as she throws her head up to the sky to survey the stars — his stars — but they were hers too.  he does not own them, he does not own her.

what do i wish for, though?  what did you wish for?

ooc: no worries! ^^

"Don't apologize for being a wolf, Brienne. Everyone has a right to react and express how they feel" she said to her new friend in her common silvery voice. Feelings were such a complicated thing, Gracious never knew how anyone could endure what the lady beside her had done. It had to have just been maddening, perhaps it still is! But, hopefully, after this talk things would look up for Brienne.

As for her wish, Gracious gave off a quiet chuckle. "You wish for whatever your heart may desire, whatever will make you the happiest and most content." She was almost a bit surprised by the question, but nonetheless cast it off to the side for now and needed to think for a minute. What would she wish for? Personally, there was nothing that interested her enough to make her wish for it. She had what she wanted so far in life, but what could she do? She didn't want to waste this perhaps good stroke of luck for her.  "I wished for happiness. As long as I can smile, then the world is my oyster." 

It was cheesy and cliche. But for creatures like Gracious, it was all she could hope and pray for. Happiness, perhaps not just for her, but others she shared her home with, others who deserved to be happy just like her.