Moonspear I stared up at the sun

@Korei Julia

There had been four younger siblings on the day Osprey gave birth to them. Tiny little things and Wraen, who had been permitted to stay with her mother, had watched them in awe and admiration. How something this small could grow up to be a big wolf? How could a creature that was no bigger than a leveret radiate so much will-power, so much determination and need to live and survive? It seemed impossible that the Great one, who had moulded them and gave them breath of life, would decide to take it away just as easily.

Yet it had happened and on the day, when Osprey had picked up one of Wraen's little brothers, who had fallen asleep the previous evening and not woken up the next, Wraen learned that everyone - no matter the age - had equal chances to die. While they had burried the little one, her mother had told her about the other siblings - "the star babies" as she had called them - who had been claimed from this Earth sooner than they had been able to make their first steps in the world. Wraen had asked, why was it so? And Osprey had not said anything.

Ever since Wraen thought that is was great injustice in life that children died. Old people, grown-up people, bad people any other kind really - that was fair, because they had lived, they had seen the world, yet children? That she could not understand and that she could not forgive. 

With these memories in her mind, Wraen was sitting on the mountain ledge, where many weeks ago Galaxy had taught her about stars, without realizing there and then that she was about to join them soon.

Korei had been so terribly upset over recent happenings, she had distanced herself from the entire pack. Her Papa, her Mama. Even her sisters. Even Terry and Dro, who had comforted her before on such things. But now, she couldn't help it. The loss of her beloved little sister had cut deep. Deeper than the crevice Galaxy had first fallen down. 

She spottedm upon one of her favorite positions to see the stars, that there was Wraen. Another she had taught the stars to. That instilled some manner of joy in her heart, and she walked up to her left. And focused her gaze upwards. "She's up there...I was told she would be" she started. "I hope it's with one of the Dippers...the first ones I showed her."

Wraen had kept her distance from Galaxy's family members, in order to give them time and space to mourn their loss. She had pondered, whether paying her respects to the alpha pair at least should be done, but somehow "I am sorry for your loss" did not seem the appropriate words for the grave situation they were in. Didn't make things any better, therefore she had kept quiet.

When Korei Julia found approached her and spoke, Wraen turned to regard her with a kind and sympathetic smile. "Hey," she replied. "How are you holding up?"

Korei turned her muzzle downward, away from the sky and down below. "Not well...She was my bestest sister, I taught her all I knew of the stars." Now, she was up there, with them. One of them. "It's stupid, it's unfair!" she argued, stamping her foot on the ground. "What couldn't she stay...Why?"

Wraen should not have expected anything less than frustration, anger and grief from Korei, yet her reaction took the young wolf aback and for a second or two she had no idea, how to handle the situation. Aside from the stillborn siblings, none of the living ones were dead and though she could imagine, how Korei felt, in no way she could understand the depth of those feelings. 

Therefore she got to her feet and with a moment of hesitation, she went and gave the Ostrega girl a wolfish-hug (by briefly pressing her head against the other's neck) and then took a step back. "That is unfair," she refrained from saying "life is unfair". "And the Great one must have a very good reason to call his daughter away so soon. Otherwise... well... he is a cruel bastard."

Korei stood there for a moment. Then was stunned for only a short second, before letting loose some tears as Wraen comforted her with physical contact. She did not know whoever this 'Great One' was, but she did not care to ask. "It better have been a good reason" she said, a hint of anger in her voice. Something very much unlike herself.

"I know, I know..." Wraen agreed quietly, thinking that she did not give much for gods in general and especially for those, who took children away. And telling people that "they were in a better place", "in Great Spirit's warm embrace" was a ton of nonesense. None of those poetic and pathetic words changed the fact that a person, who should have lived for many years to come, was dead and had broken hearts of the family members that were left behind. 

"You were there - right? What exactly happened to her?" she asked after a while, when she hoped Korei had calmed down enough to talk. Last Wraen had talked with Galaxy, she had seemed to be on the weaker side, yet not like a person, who was about to die.

Korei sniffled, her watery eyes looking down at Wraen. She slowly nodded to her question. "I...I don't know...but it wasn't the wolf." That much she knew, and yet her sisters had gone running off, as well as her Papa. No one had listened to her...no one ever listened to little Korei. "My sisters and Papa didn't listen, when I said it wasn't the wolf..."

"What wolf?" Wraen furrowed her brow, raking through her memory and putting together bits and pieces from her conversation with Hydra. It was too bad that she had been so tired at that point and a lot of, what they had discussed, had been forgotten by the afternoon the next day, when she had woken up. 

"Oh... they think that someone killed Galaxy?" she asked to be sure that she understood. "How do you know that it was not the wolf? Did you meet him? Did they catch him?"

Korei shook her head to Wraen's second question. She was not enjoying all this talk about the incident, but at least she was getting some frustration off her chest. "Bite marks...too small for a wolf" she answered. She had managed to spot them. "I tried to tell them...but they never listen."

"That's the fate of all non-mainstream siblings," Wraen sighed, saying this more to herself than to Korei, though the theme could be liberally applied to both of them. Sarah had not taken her very seriously, ever since they stepped over adolescence and Terance - though better and a bit different... well, she had a feeling that more often than not he saw his little sister as a kid, who was playing being a grown up. 

"Has it always been like this? Them not listening to you?" she asked, hoping to divert Korei's attention to a slightly different subject. From, what she had noticed over the months spent here, was that there was an invisible wall between the young Ostrega and the Cerberus. The latter always hanging around together, while the first always being sort of an outsider.

Korei nodded again. Her family rarely ever listened to her, in any type of situation. "They don't...sometimes I think they hate me. Or just look down on me." And in her mind, that was quite true. In her mind, they did look down on her. She once had said, enough was enough. Now, she thought it was time she stuck by that, if it meant preventing another death like Galaxy's.

"I don't think they hate you," Wraen said. Parents treated their kids differently and loved them uneaqualy, but she could not imagine a reason, why Amekaze (who she did not know that well) and Charon (who she knew slightly better, but whose presence made her always feel like a little girl, who has silly dreams) would hate Korei. In regards of the black trio - they definitely cared for their sister and did not wish that bad things would happen to her - but...

"... I think that it is a bit difficult for them to accept that you are different. I mean that was one of the many reasons, why I could not get along with my sister Sarah. We are two very, very different people," Wraen said, though she would have loved to add that her sister's nose had been stuck up too much.

Korei turned her head away from Wraen. She still thought that while they may not have hated her, they did not like her. "If that's the case...I don't want to be different...Not anymore." Korei let her front legs slide forward a bit so she could lay down, and rest her head on her legs, huffing with frustration.

Though the girls were roughly the same age, Wraen suddenly felt the older and wiser one here. She sighed and lied down next to Korei Julia. "Being different is not a bad thing," she began slowly, looking for the right words to wrap in the very complex idea. "You can't be someone you are not and... if people can't accept you for, who you are, then... then it is their problem, not yours." That came out harsher than she had intended. 

"I mean... well, let's turn it like this - what is your idea of a person you should be, in order for others to appreciate you?" she asked.

Wraen's words hit, but the frustration building up in Korei, she only half listened. Yes, it may have been their problem. But Korei grew up thinking she was imperfect. So when she was asked what she should be, in order for others to appreciate her, she was quick to answer. 

"Strong...brave...useful...." Even though she and Papa had sorted it out, she still had hurt feelings by what he had called her.

"So you are none of those things? Who told you that?" Wraen could not understand, why anyone tell this to a person, whose self-esteem was already low. Though she had had her differences with Sarah, both Osprey and Dante had never condemned her for the things she was not and encouraged to find her own path and work with what she had got. With her small build she would never be a good mercenary, with her lack of understanding about, how physics, biology and basic medicine worked, she would be a very bad naturalist, yet no one had ever thought any less of her, because she could not push herself in a direction that she had no interest or skills in. 

"What do you enjoy doing? What are you good at?" she questioned further.

Korei shook her head, she didn't want to say. She kept her muzzle shut. But the next question, she could answer as it took her mind off the down side's of her life. "Stars...the stars." Stars were all she liked, and they all kept her calm. Kept her happy. Kept her sane..."I always look up at them...and forget everything." But now everytime she looked, she thought of Galaxy. Her one quiet place, had been taken.

Wraen had half-expected that Korei would name at least three or more things she liked to do and was good at, but instead she told that stargazing was her one and only and true passion. In the light of this, the young DiSarinno could understand Charon's and Cerberus' point of view and why they pressured her to find something more useful. Because stargazing - with all the information and complexity and awesomness - did not bring food to the table, did not keep you safe and apart from a lovely past-time was not very practical either. 

But being the good soul she was, neither did Wraen say anything of this to Korei, nor did she let on that she was thinking all of this, while she pondered over the best possible answer. "Alright. And what have you tried and failed so far to be good at?" she asked, hoping that the girl would not be offended by the use of "failing".

Korei answered with a sad voice, "Everything. Fighting, hunting...I'm a screw up." That's what Papa had called her. It stuck with her, that word. It hurt to think of it, but it's what she saw herself as now. She didn't even glance over at Wraen as she said that.

Wanna fade soon?

"Well, you must be good at hunting - how else would you have survived so long?" Wraen remarked, thinking that Korei Julia was exaggerating things just too much. Hunting came naturally, just the same way as running from danger and facing it head on, when there was no other option.

"Let's make a deal," she suggested, excited by the simplicity of the idea, but, how clever it was. "I will teach you hunting and survival stuff," Wraen continued. Osprey had taught her children well and she would be happy to see that her knowledge was passed on. "And you teach me, how to read stars. I know nothing of those shiny objects, as you may have already found out."

Want to fade soon?

Korei shook her head. Her parents did hunting, and she normally just got what she could from the caches, or snack on something already dead. "I...sometimes sneak food from the caches...I haven't really tried hunting." She was afraid of failure. And a scolding from Papa again.

"Could you really?" she asked. Plus, without Galaxy, she had no one to teach the stars too...She was missing her sister more and more by the second. "Thank you! Oh, thank you thank you thank you!" she shouted, bouncing about and twirling.

"It might be comforting for you to know that 4 out of 5 hunts are unsuccesful even for the most skilled hunters," Wraen told, finding it weird that no one ever had cared much to notice that Korei did not put any effort in hunting or wanted to teach her as well. 

"A deal then," she replied. "I invite you to lunch to my place - I have a pair of hare's ears that we can share," with that she got to her feet, stretched and led the way to her den and storage place, feeling just as happy for the mutual agreement as Korei Julia was.