Moonspear Flutter Like A Butterfly

Korei Julia watched past the border. She had been thinking about this, ever since the first time Galaxy 'died'. Now since Galaxy was truly dead, and she thought no one wanted her around, she stood here once more. She felt discarded, like a toe lost to frostbite. She was starting to see how much her family were killers. She had always seen the light in others. But now, she could not see past darkness of the world. 

Perhaps somewhere else would be nicer. A different place to call home. A better place. Yet still, she hesitated. Why? Because she also thought of Rannoch, of Wraen. Even Terance, whom she had embarassed herself in front of. 

She sighed. This felt like the biggest decision in her life...She put a paw over the border as she slowly came to her decision, determined to make it all the way past.

Wraen's days had been quite busy of late, because, when you have to divide your
time between your brother, who taught her self-defence, scouting the nearby lands and also planning the next lessons for Korei (and her as well, she learned by teaching), there was less spare moments for anything else. Therefore it was no wonder that on the very evening, when Charon's unappreciated kid was about to make the biggest decision in her life, Wraen also happened to be near borders. She was returning from the flatlands, where she had spent most of the day and met with wolves from other packs. 

"Good evening, Korei," she called to the girl from afar - it was easy to spot her in the darkness even with all of the snow around. "What are you up to so late?" she asked, when she had come close enough to see the girl's face clearly and have no need to speak very loudly.

Korei froze when she heard Wraen's voice. One of the wolves that if she were to stay, it would be for them. She struggled inwardly, on whether or not to just run, or risk making conversation and being convinced to stay. "Wraen...when you told me you ran away, what did it feel like? When you ran?"

Oh, no. Wraen froze in shock, when Korei Julia revealed her intentions. She knew immediately that those weren't innocent questions sparked by curiosity. The young Ostrega was ready to act and, if something happened to her, while doing so, the Redleaf-DiSarinno would be the one to blame. For planting the idea in her brain. 

"I... I did not run away. Not exactly like that. I told my parents, I bid my farewells, tied loose ends, so to say," she stammered, her mind racing, looking for the right things to say and wishing there was something she could say that would change Korei Julia's mind. Because, while leaving had worked for Wraen, she was not so sure about this girl. Was she strong enough to survive on her own?

"I was heart-broken and home-sick. I really loved my parents, my sister and would have wanted to see my younger siblings growing up," she replied as honestly as she could. "I did not know, where I was going to end up, who I was going to meet along the way. It was excruciating not knowing, but at the same time I had a goal in mind - I was looking for Terance - and that made things bearable."

"Are you considering leaving?" she asked, hoping to hear a negative answer.

She glanced away from Wraen, her golden eyes facing out away from Moonspear. She knew the dangers, the fears of leaving everything behind. But she wanted to do this. This family she had was starting to feel unfamiliar. She felt she was beginning to be left behind. If she was to survive, she was either going to learn to keep up, or leave to some place better.

"I can't keep up...I'm falling behind. My family, they are more violent than I expected. Speaking of killing others" she started. "I can't kill, not like them. And, if I fall behind, I..." She couldn't find the words in herself. To say that her family my find no further use for you. "And everywhere I look, all I see is Galaxy. Everywhere, Wraen...But like you said..." She paused, looking to Wraen again. "That's the way life goes." She turned and started walking, she couldn't bear to give a goodbye. Yet still, part of her was pulling at her, begging her to stay.

It was odd hearing Wraen's own words used against her and she felt both guilty for saying them and sorry for Korei Julia, who was unhappy among her family. It was a tragedy really - because she could see the wolf the young Ostrega could become were she allowed to grow and let her soul shine through. Perhaps she would have done better with Osprey and Dante as parents - especially with former, who had children late in life and therefore did not take them for granted, rather as gifts that needed to be cherished.

"No one forces you to kill, Korei," Wraen objected, though even she was not sure about the truth in her own words. "And you don't have to be, who you are not," she bit back the part about "they can't force you to go against the grain - if they don't see that you are miserable... they are fools", in case there were invisible eyes and ears that watched and listened to this interaction.

"Do you know, where are you going?" she asked. "Or how are you going to survive now - it's a lot harder, when you are on your own, than you are with somebody." Partly she thought that this argument would be strong enough for Korei to drop the idea of leaving just now, but think her decision through and maybe do some preparations beforehand.

"That's not the problem!" she found herself shouting. Now she faced Wraen. She was starting to feel just as she always did; misunderstood. "I know that now...It's that they look down on me! That no matter how hard I try, one of them still looks down on me! I wanted...I wanted everything to go fine, everyone to stay together." But Galaxy's death had broken her. 

She shook her head hard. If she did not leave now... "If I don't leave, I won't ever leave...Besides, you survived, so why can't I, huh?! Are you going to look down on me too?!" She shut her mouth out of surprise. Had she just said that. 

"Wraen, I...I didn't mean that, I swear, I..." She felt like sobbing again, and her lower lip trembled.

As of late Wraen had become a target of multiple emotional outbursts and - if the first had been a shock - by the third she knew that she had to remain calm, let it pass over her head and listen. She did not blame Korei Julia for feeling the way she did, did not take offence, when she shouted and insulted her unintentionally. And though it stung, Wraen knew that in a way the girl was right. She was doubting her ability to survive. 

She sighed, closed her eyes for a moment and then went over to the girl to console her the best she could: "Don't be mad at me - I am worried about you as a friend, who does not want to see you perish. Believe me, I want to see you happy, appreciated and among people, who love you for who you are and not try to change you. And it's your decision. If you want to leave, I won't try to stop you, just... let  me help you along the way. Just for a while."

For timeline reasons, Korei is going alone, if that's good with you

She shook her head. "I can't have you get in trouble" she replied. "They might blame you for me disappearing, and I don't want that." If Wraen had gotten hurt, cause she had left...Then again, she wouldn't know if she left. Korei wanted to make sure that Wraen didn't get in trouble.

"Don't tell them. Don't tell them I left, you won't get in trouble then. Promise me, okay?" She found herself approaching her friend, and then went to rest her chin on her shoulder. "I don't want anyone else hurt."

Sure. :)

Wraen would have argued that she would not get in any trouble, that with proper reasoning she could explain all the "why"s and "how"s, if that was needed. That Terance would be on her side and as hard as it was for her to see Hydra in the eyes, she had a feeling that this tough girl would take her side too. After all, what she would do, would be for the benefit of a family member.

She did not agree with the way Korei was handling things and hoped that there would not be a day any time soon, when the girl would regret her hasty and emotional decision. At the same time she understood that there were some big decisions in one's life that you had to make yourself and stick to them, even if the family or friends did not share the same view. 

"I am sad to see you go," she said quietly. "And I wish that you find, what you are looking for," with this she released herself from Korei's embrace and took few steps back. There were tears brimming in here eyes, but she did not want her friend to see her cry. "Good luck, Star girl."

"Thank you" Korei answered with a sad, yet glad smile. "Tell Terance I was sorry...he might understand" she said, still recalling that embarassing moment between the two. Then she turned, and started on her way. Slow at first, then speeding up her pace. 

Thank you for the thread