Dawnlark Plains the city is burning around them

there is something in dauntless that recognizes his way of dealing with grief and death is not, perhaps, the healthiest of ways. or, at the very least, thinking that his grief would be a burden. that was certainly a toxic way of viewing his own grief. that he thinks he must pretend he is not grieving as painfully as he is in order to prove ( to himself or others ) that he is strong is all wrong. yet, he does anyway. he knows catori and the cubs need him. he likes to think that morningside needs him. dauntless offers the leader a curt, albeit appreciative nod as adyita gives him the run down on how others seem to be taking the news of their alpha's death. no one could ever replace grayday but they could keep the pack running and see it prosper in his memory. that was all he could ask for, as grayday's son. that his legacy so interwoven into morningside continues even though he has left the corporeal world behind.

"i'm fine." it was a stone-cold lie and he hates being dishonest but even still he keeps everything internalized even after recognizing the flaws in it. he does not say what he truly desires to: that he's hurting, that he's incredibly angry at grayday for abandoning him too. that anger feels worse than anything else and is definitely not anything dauntless wishes to capitalize upon with himself, let alone anyone else. "i know the pack is in capable paws," a compliment based entirely in honesty. he was not a leader but that didn't mean that he wouldn't challenge if he had a sliver of doubt that anyone that had stepped up to replace his father wasn't capable enough; but he has no doubts and thus speaks, "so i will turn my concerns and energy towards catori and the cubs." he would not leave them. he was not like khoe. he was not flighty. he was stalwart and unmoving. dependable. "i don't want to crowd her," dauntless admits to adyita, drawing in a deep breath. it had made him uncomfortable just watching everyone flock to and fuss at her when grayday's body had been discovered. "i will wait until the ...excitement —" it does not feel like the right word but it's the only word that comes to his mind; though it is not meant in the joyful spectrum of the word. his mouth twists unfavorably in evidence of his dislike of using that word for lack of a better one. "— dies down before i visit her and the cubs."