Broken Boulder what will you dream of tonight, lady rachel?

obligatory *vague* disclaimer

It had been about a week since she'd gotten back, but it could have been shorter or longer than that, for all she knew. Time seemed to both drag and race by; the latter when she tried to move around, the former when she found herself immobile, trapped in her head. The dark-furred girl had began to fall into a depression, ruminating on all that had come to pass.

Lily had wanted to go home. She knew that. She remembered well her fight with Alarian, and while the memories surrounding her plunge into the creek were less solid, she understood that she'd gotten there from running away. Now she was remorseful in more than one way. If she hadn't left, she wouldn't have put everyone--most of all, herself--through this drama, this dilemma. And now, with a broken ankle and a fuzzy head, she'd almost ensured that she would not go home anytime soon.

Speechless and morose, the young woman pulled herself from her den, awkward, wobbly. She limped through the tunnel, eventually settling down on her haunches just outside, utterly exhausted. The sun was warm on her ebony pelt, and she closed her eyes, finding some small comfort from it after the cool air between the boulders.

Lily took a deep inhalation, holding it for a moment, then let it go slowly, counting the seconds as they went by. Her ears swiveled lazily, listening to the little sounds around her. She opened her eyes once more, almost able to feel the sadness she knew was buried in their depths.

Quiet. Timid. Serious. The very antithesis of what she'd always been--but here she sat, still and cold as a stone.

fatherhood suits delight more than leadership ever did -- at least right now, while they're still small and unable to speak. he can still feel a looming void at the back of his brain, threatening every moment with its vast nothingness. it frightens him -- and it makes him push harder to win these moments of clarity. 

it doesn't make him social though. lord. delight at his best still hates being social. 

despite that, when he sees lily delight feels an urge to go to her -- he knows what alarian's told him (the argument, the depature) and little else. he thinks her return is a good thing... maybe? it's hard to tell. she herself looks like she's seen better days -- delight relates. cautiously he calls out to her in greeting, his approach slow and almost reticent, despite him being the one to initiate. still, he approaches: if nothing else, he should apologise for that time with queenie.

A greeting floated her way, and she turned to see Delight, heading towards her. Where she once might have vocalized, voice lilting and chipper, Lily instead dipped her head in welcome, a graceful smile blooming over her features. Their last meeting had been inauspicious, and she'd never had much good will for the man.

But. They were stuck here together; might as well make the best of it.

Lily blinked softly, waiting for the Chancellor to initiate the conversation. She'd ruled against starting herself--the words stuck in her throat like a bone. She could gather her thoughts, craft beautiful turns of phrase in her head. . .but the sound would not come. Not a peep, save childish whines and whimpers. And that would not do.

should he apologise? (i mean, yes) -- has enough time passed that it'd just be reopening an old wound, some one time scuffle that doesn't need to be revisted? he wavers, hoping lily will start the conversation and spare him this debate -- but of course she doesn't. ah. "hi," delight says, feeling incredibly foolish, "we never really -- got to speak much, before. sorry about that," there! an apology without evoking the specific incident -- hopefully that'll work. or make her madder, really, who knows, he's just doing his best here.

She shook her head, smiling at him, hoping that he'd take the meaning in her eyes. She had taken offense before, but it felt so trivial now, in the wake of everything that had happened since. Queenie was now a mother, Delight was busy with his duties, and she. . .well, everything had changed, for her. How could she hold on to grudges, these days?

Lily dipped her muzzle at him, raising her eyebrows and cocking her head in a sort of How are you, mate? gesture. It was so frustrating, not being able to speak, and she tried to keep that emotion from her face, attempting to paint, solely, what she was trying to say across her countenance. Her movements were simple, stilted.

This was fucking torturous.

it does not, thankfully, take much for delight to cotton on. lily had never struck him as verbally reticent -- and the exaggerated gestures she's using to communicate paint the picture pretty well. he'd not known she was hurt when she got back. or .. whatever is causing her to  not speak. 

delicately he doesn't react, only nodding as she seems to accept her apology. this is tricky for him -- words are delight's forte, being, as he is, someone dedicated to preserving oral history. nonverbal communication he is not so good with. he watches her raise her eyebrows and gesture towards him, and takes a guess: "been busy with um, the puppies," he says. pausing, he adds, "i can -- tell you about them, if you want?" he's not a very gushing parent -- but it'd save her from having to try to say too much, and i dunno, maybe she's into babies.

She was happy to see that he got it, that she didn't need to further exaggerate her facial expressions to get the point across. She was also relieved that he continued the conversation, nodding enthusiastically at his question. It was still frustrating, but this was one of the less aggravating interactions she'd suffered through after losing her speech.

Her one meeting with Queenie had been rather inauspicious, so Lily assumed she wasn't allowed close to the den; therefore, she hadn't made the trek there. But she loved puppies, and stories about the children. Whatever Delight could provide, she would take. It would help this whole conversation be a lot less awkward, anyway.

she seems to take to the idea, thankfully. it feels awkward to -- have a one way conversation (as if it's not a pattern in his life already, but go off), and for a moment he hesitates, trying to compose his thoughts. after a beat he takes a breath. "there's three of them," delight begins, focusing on the objective overview, "a boy and two girls -- mali, brilliance, and solomon. their eyes are open now but they're still pretty tiny.. i didn't, uh, realise how tiny they'd be. which is kind of stupid, i guess."

he smiles at his feet. "i was really unsure about this whole thing -- both of us were. we hadn't, y'know, planned on it. or really wanted it. for me it was like -- i thought i could maybe ... preserve tindómë that way -- oh, um, tindómë being the pack we're from -- i thought that it would be a way to make sure we had a legacy. clearly it didn't work, at least in the sense of saving tindómë as a place." looking back up at her, delight tilts his head sheepishly, realising he's meandered off topic. "sorry -- it's just been on my mind a lot, lately. they're perfect, though. now that they're here i don't regret it."

She nodded throughout this speech at the appropriate places, though he looked at his paws, most of the time. It brought a smile to her face, to hear the Chancellor talk about his pups so, and it also put the man in a better light, at least in her eyes. Since he'd arrived, Delight had been a rival, someone to distrust and scorn--but how could she hate the young, candid father now? He was family, now that he was here.

Lily shook her head at his apology, grinning graciously. If he knew her at all, especially before the accident, he'd know that she was one for long-winded rambles. . .and she did not fault anyone else for their own rants. She was just happy someone was speaking to her without pity. It was a refreshing change of pace, after all that she had endured.

she doesn't seem to object to his rambling, so after a moment he sucks in a breath and cautiously goes on, watching to make sure she doesn't start looking bored or annoyed. "tindómë's been on my mind a lot lately," he repeats, voice turning shy, "because of them, i guess. like... i feel bad that it ended up this way sometimes. not -- alarian was very kind to take us in and -- i like it here, of course, but i also know we're sort of interlopers. i don't uh, i don't blame any of you for being distrustful or upset about it, honestly," he adds, wondering if lily is still upset about their presence in the way eris and the others were -- are? who knows. "i wasn't even supposed to lead -- and i definitely wasn't supposed to lead on my own -- and i feel like, i feel like i'm cursed, somehow, because burke died and then the king elk and -- cicero, even, even if he wasn't with us with us, and just, it all sort of fell apart at the end."

this is maybe definitely not a very good thing to be telling your packmate who barely knows you (hi i'm cursed and i will ruin your pack), and as he speaks color floods his cheeks, his jaw snapping shut with an embarrassed whine. good thing she can't talk, he thinks before he can help himself and shakes his head to chase it away. "um! the kids though. they're great," delight says, changing the subject and hoping she will please nicely let it all go because he is such a sadsack. 

And then, even more words came from the Chancellor, and these brought her dark brows together, mulling each and every syllable. Names she didn't know, problems she didn't really understand. But she could sympathize, and she could most certainly listen, and listen she did, until Delight had gone full circle, back to the pups again.

She blinked silently for a moment, then reached out to press her muzzle against his shoulder, gentle and comforting. Lily pulled back and smiled, eyes sparkling. She was glad he was here. She had. . .well, not underestimated him, but certainly had misjudged him. Had focused too much on the negatives of his presence here, rather than the positive aspects of Delight as a whole. She could feel bad about it, but she chose instead, now, to move forward. From this day on, they were friends.

And there was one thing. . . Lily dipped her nose in the direction of the den, then glanced at Delight, her eyes questioning. Can I see your pups? She wouldn't mind if she said no; wouldn't be upset if he didn't understand at all.

im laughin, tagging mostly for ref?

honestly what has he ever done to earn the gentle women in his life in moments like these? literally nothing and yet -- he sighs, accepting lily's gesture with an anxious smile, hoping that -- should she (hopefully?) gain her voice back, the little.. curse thing remain between them. alarian probably... wouldn't like that. ugh. 

he blinks owlishly, following her gaze toward the den. it's not the first time he'd been asked, and again, his instinct is of course, but. "queenie," delight says sheepishly. unlike pyro, lily is not a stranger -- but it is pushing it. then again... they can just linger outside, no need to intrude. "if you want to see them, though," the chancellor offers, smiling a little wider (okay he wants to show them off yeah), and turns to guide the advocate towards his and @Queenie's den to steal a glance of the babes within.

wanna fade?

A snort of laughter left her nose at his explanation, that one word slipping bemusedly from his tongue. Yes, it told her all she needed to know. Queenie was her polar opposite; they had never gotten on. Perhaps motherhood had changed her, but somehow, Lily doubted that very much. Delight, however, gave her a glimmer of hope, and began to lead her toward the den where his children rested.

She was thankful for his friendship. That he worried so much about her letting slip the news of a curse to anyone--much less Alarian, who treated her like a ghost--the thought did not even cross her mind. In time, she might even forget it, remembering only that the Chancellor took the time to sit and talk with her in this wretched state, and had trusted her at last.

Curses were things of tales, after all. Love, care, camaraderie--those were all real, and vastly more important to her. She could savor this moment, and hope that he felt the same newfound good will toward her, as well.