Wildfire had stuck close to the rendezvous site lately to help look after her dad, though occasionally it became a bit much and she found herself wanting to get away from the situation for a while. As she currently loped away from the caldera, she told herself that it was good that he was back on his feet now. Surely he would adapt to his partial blindness and everything would be fine. She took a deep breath, then tried to push these thoughts to the back of her mind for now. She felt sort of bad but she knew that everyone was so busy taking care of Peregrine that they probably wouldn't even notice her absence. That was good, at least, seeing as she technically still wasn't supposed to leave the caldera.
When her thoughts continued to plague her despite her best efforts to clear her mind, Wildfire tried to escape them by bursting into a gallop. Maybe she could outrun her problems. She somehow managed to avoid tripping or stumbling as she hurtled across Meadowlark Prairie, the long summer grasses brushing her underside. She scented a wolf pack to the east of her location and began to sheer more toward the north. She knew that going too far in that direction would prove dangerous, so she didn't plan on going far. She would run until she ran out of breath, then turn and walk home.
Something else stole her breath before the run could rob her of it. Wildfire pressed her heels into the earth as a lake appeared in the distance. She glanced to her left, amber eyes wandering over a pretty meadow, then looked ahead again. The distant waters called to her. She continued, loping more slowly now. Although the lake was her destination, the mountains just beyond it drew her eye as well. Wildfire wasn't exactly sure where she was, though she admired her surroundings as she cantered along. It was really beautiful here.
Working around the clock, the former wolves of Redtail Rise had nearly solidified their claim on Phoenix Maplewood. Saena was assured they still had the aid of Nova Peak (or whatever they would come to be in the future) should a conflict erupt. Life was becoming comfortable again, yet a glance toward their former home, still smokey in the distance, was usually enough to sober any good mood. Some days it hit harder than others, and yesterday was one of those days.
In the early morning Saena had excused herself from Reek's side and, leaving the alpha male in charge with the excuse that she needed to take a trip to Blacktail Deer Plateau, she departed the maplewood. She followed the edge of the mountains south, stopping in Tormented Tarns to rest for the night, and then began to move west along the foothills. She had no intention of actually going to Blacktail Deer Plateau, but she made as if she did. The longer she walked, though, and the more she spotted signs of destruction from the storm, the more concerned she felt about the wellbeing of her family. By the time she reached Greatwater Lake, her plans had changed and she did intend to go to the plateau.
But first she wanted to take some time to re-familiarize herself with her former stomping grounds. She could hardly remember the last time she'd been here. It must've been when she'd found Jaws waiting out a badger in its den, or at least that was the memory that came to mind. Shaking her head with a small smile, the yearling continued south along the lake's edge... and stopped abruptly when she spotted a red-haired figure running right this way in the distance.
Saena's hackles flared and she began a quick sidestep, readying herself for another attempt on her life by Fox. Not until Wildfire got closer would Saena realize she was not her mother, and until then, she would leer and skulk defensively, but hold her ground. They were far from the caldera and hypocritical Saena wouldn't bow her head here, not to them.
Speaking of beautiful, another wolf appeared, approaching the lake from another angle. Wildfire slowed as she arrived near the shore, her attention fixed on the stranger. She was always wary of other wolves, particularly this far from the protection of her pack, yet she couldn't help but marvel at the pretty markings beneath her even more stunning indigo eyes. Wildfire's gaze traveled backward, to her stump of a tail, her brow knitting curiously, and then back to the stranger's face. The closer she came, the more obvious the other female's expression became. It was not friendly.
She had arrived at the water's edge. Wildfire wanted to take a drink, though she feared taking her eyes off the other wolf. Although beautiful, she looked decidedly surly and she was definitely looking this way. She could not imagine the expression was directed at her on a personal level, then she paused and wondered, What if it was? Perhaps she was far enough north to run into her parents' enemies after all, and she certainly resembled her notorious mother. The youth swallowed, wondering if she should try to act friendly, ignore the stranger entirely or maybe beat a hasty retreat?
She stood there a long time, deliberating, avoiding making eye contact while still keeping an eye on the pale she-wolf. Eventually, still indecisive, Wildfire bent over to take that drink. She then slowly sank to her haunches, trying to show that she posed no threat. Her leg muscles remained tightly coiled; she was ready to spring back onto her feet should the other wolf make any aggressive overtures.
Saena's sidestep morphed into a more direct approach as "Fox" came nearer and she anticipated an assault. The bristle of her coat only intensified with every step her nemesis made. She was about to peel back her lips and snarl when the scents of both Peregrine and Fox became evident, but instead of charging her as Saena expected, "Fox" approached the water cautiously. She then dropped her haunches to the ground, causing the maplewood female to stop and squint.
That had to be Fox, there was no other wolf in the wilds that looked like that... Except...
No, she was wrong. Though she'd mostly forgotten the events leading up to meeting her half-siblings, Saena remembered how they looked, or at least how this one looked. She couldn't possibly forget, not really. Not with the surge of hatred she'd first felt upon seeing Fox's lookalike. She didn't remember the kid's name, but she was unmistakeable with her black tail and snout otherwise, leaving Saena feeling kind of foolish about seeing Fox in her.
But why feel foolish? Wildfire was a member of Redhawk Caldera, an enemy and a threat who no doubt ate up the lies her mother told her about Saena and her kin, supposing there were lies to begin with. She was also young, an easy target. Saena could eliminate her right now, finish the job her sister had started, but though the thought crossed her mind, Saena couldn't will her feet to move. No matter how hard a blow she wished to deal to her adoptive father and his murderous wife, Saena was not Junior. She was not violent enough to go after a child, and unlike Sebastian, she didn't even have a compelling reason to attack Wildfire aside from revenge.
Well, she was better than that. She stood straighter, though her coat never truly smoothed out, and said, "oh, it's just you."
To avoid just sitting there like some weirdo, Wildfire began to lick her shoulder, though her tongue froze, as did the rest of her body, when the stranger spoke. She remained very still for a few beats, then straightened up and blinked across the way. "Oh, it's just you"? Wildfire didn't know what to make of these words. They implied a certain familiarity, yet Wildfire was almost certain she had never met this wolf before. She was so remarkably pretty, the youth was sure she would have remembered her.
She wanted to respond, yet wasn't sure what to say. "It's me?" she eventually queried, her voice quiet. Her expression conveyed both her confusion and her curiosity. Then, all of a sudden, Wildfire felt a strange sense of guilt. Maybe they had met somewhere along the line and she was just having some sort of embarrassing brain fart. "I'm sorry, I don't think I recognize you," she admitted, the words blurting from her smudged muzzle, her body language likely giving away her social anxiety.
The confusion on the other female's face was more than enough to tell Saena two things: that Wildfire and her siblings did not remember her and that Fox or Peregrine hadn't done a good job of describing her to their children. That second was sort of an assumption; Saena could think of no good reason why the alpha female of the caldera would attempt to kill her without tasking her whole pack with the same thing. Come to think of it, Sebastian hadn't recognized her either, and it wasn't like Saena was easy to miss in a crowd.
Maybe, then, the alpha pair weren't as after her blood as she thought they were. Oh well, she would still try to kill either of them if she ever saw them again. As for their children, well, she had the opportunity and couldn't do it, maybe because she knew they were innocent. They couldn't possibly have had a hand in the sentence Saena suffered, aside from existing. She couldn't really fault them for that.
"You wouldn't remember," Saena realized, "you were young, very young. But I remember." Not the name, though. She only remembered Raven. The other two had weird names, one because it was a strange-sounding bird, the other because it wasn't really a name at all. But what that was exactly, well, Saena couldn't recall. "I visited you, once. Was going to teach you about naturalism, the weather specifically, 'til your mother decided I deserve to die for someone else's crimes and forbade me from doing that at risk of death." Would that jog a memory? Did Wildfire even know about that, or was she in the dark about the attempted murder too? Saena didn't know but figured she would start fishing there.
When the pretty she-wolf spoke, Wildfire stood and began to move closer, walking slowly around the curving shoreline. She took a seat again perhaps three yards from the stranger, even as she mentioned visiting Wildfire once. The youngster blinked, though as her new acquaintance gave details, the timeline sort of clicked in her head. This must have happened when she was very, very young, prior to Junior's visit. Otherwise, she never would have been allowed to visit with anyone at the caldera, much less the young puppies at the time.
She took a breath as she tried to decide what to say in response to the acidic comment about her mother. Of course, she felt defensive of Fox; she had been a wonderful mother to her. But Wildfire already knew she didn't entirely share in her parents' beliefs about outsiders, particularly northerners. They could be decent, as Dante and others had proved. Wildfire would always put her pack and family first, of course, but she also wanted to get away, see the world, even make friends (social anxiety aside). It was tough trying to strike a balance but she really wanted to try. She was growing up, after all, and had a mind of her own.
"My parents do not tolerate outsiders, after my half-sister tried to kill me," Wildfire stated slowly. If she arched her throat, she could even show off her scars, yet she felt no need. "They also believe everyone from the north a hostile enemy, but... I know they're not a hundred percent right about that." It felt sort of traitorous to say that, just like it felt kind of crafty to sneak away like she had, but she was becoming her own person, dammit. And she was an Outrider.
Once she was able to bite back some of these thoughts and feelings, she squared her shoulders somewhat and said, "I'm Wildfire." Not often did she give her real first name outright, though this wolf had already been told at some point. "Who're you?" And would she explain her relationship with Wildfire's parents? And why she had been formerly selected to tutor young Wildfire? She was very curious about these things, though didn't ask, hoping instead that the indigo-eyed she-wolf would volunteer the information herself.
Wildfire's explanation about her parents came as no surprise. Peregrine had been territorial even at the plateau and Fox was a Class A bitch as far as Saena was concerned, so it wasn't shocking that they were total asshats to anyone who didn't swear fealty to them. Plus, they'd had someone slip through their ranks and attempt to commit murder, so even though she hated the pair of them and exaggerated their attitudes greatly, Saena knew that closing their borders was reasonable. But, "I wasn't an outsider." I was family once, but that wasn't true either. She'd never been family to Fox and Saena suspected that even if she had tried, the selfish wench would always have rejected her as someone else's offspring.
"My sister did a terrible thing and should never be forgiven for it," Saena agreed, "but your parents were part of it, too." You can blame them, she thought, bitter as acid. "Your parents abandoned us at about your age, left us behind at our old pack without a personal goodbye, and never came to visit. You wouldn't understand what that does to someone's psyche, to have a parent ditch them like that. You're too young to have seen it yourself. Junior was fucked up. She tried to kill herself. Then she found out about you and went off the handle.
I won't try to make excuses for her actions," Saena went on, having long since accepted that Junior's fate was sealed the moment she heard tell of Fox's offspring, "but I know she felt she had no other choice. In her eyes her father replaced her. She did a terrible, unforgivable thing but she must've felt worse to actually do it." It was hard not to be jealous, but somehow Saena wasn't, or else wasn't letting it bother her. Peregrine had ceased to be her father and she knew he was terrible at it anyway. He was bound to fuck up again and again. There was nothing to be jealous about when she thought of it that way.
"And you're right, the north is hostile. To them. Because they injured my mate for helping one of them. Because they tried to kill me because of who my sister was, not because I'd ever done anything to them." She almost snorted. "Not to you or your siblings. Not my pack anyway. And not to anyone else anymore either. I realize now that the others probably know as little as you do about it." But Peregrine and Fox, well, they would never be free to walk in the north, not as long as they lived. "I'm Saena. Saena Redtail."
The Alphas of Redhawk Caldera defined outsiders as anyone who was not part of the pack, though Wildfire didn't get an opportunity to say this. It turned out the stranger had quite a lot to say, much more than the youngster could have anticipated. She began with identifying herself as Junior's sister, which meant that they were related. Wildfire was still processing this knowledge when the woman vented about Peregrine and Fox's past behavior and its effects on both herself and Junior.
By now, Wildfire was reeling a bit. As much as she was starting to feel like a grownup, she was roughly the equivalent of a ten-year-old girl. It was true, she could not relate to abandonment, nor understand the first thing about suicide. It seemed the pale beauty blamed Peregrine more than Fox, or at least that's how it came across when she explained it was specifically Peregrine's actions that had prompted Junior's.
Little did either of them know that she was the one the yearling's mate had assisted. Wildfire was by now so overwhelmed that she would never think to make the connection (besides, the details were quite vague) and she barely even registered Saena's introduction. When she finally lapsed into silence, the youngster just sat there, her cheeks hot and her chest tight. She felt like she had just been slapped in the face, not only by this information but her half-sister's angry tone.
Wildfire had heard some of the caldera's history, of course, as well as her parents' personal stories. She had heard it from her mother, the Chronicler. She hadn't seen this side of the story, of course, and naturally she wondered how much of it was true. She was old enough now to know her parents weren't perfect and she had even begun to defy them in small ways as she shaped her own beliefs. But she didn't believe some stranger over them, not even her half-sister. She didn't necessarily think Saena was lying; but surely she must be exaggerating or skewing the details. And she couldn't help but give her beloved parents the benefit of the doubt.
The silence stretched between them and it became downright uncomfortable. Finally, Wildfire sputtered, "I don't—I don't know what to say."
For the entire duration, Wildfire said nothing. Saena supposed that was better than if the youth had got up and attacked her. It was more evident now that Peregrine and Fox weren't training their offspring to be hateful little demons after all; if Wildfire had gotten physical, then Saena would've believed otherwise. Instead, the pup sat there for a long time and when she finally did speak, it was to say that she didn't know what to say.
"You don't have to say anything," said the older woman. Saena knew without Wildfire saying it that it was unlikely she would be believed, but then, there was the smallest part of her that hoped Fox and Peregrine had never known her children would learn this story. Had never told them a different version. While Saena's memory of events was selective—while she forgot that Peregrine had extended an invitation to the entire pack and she had refused solely because he hadn't had the tact to pull her and her siblings aside and talk to them about it first—she didn't say anything inherently untrue, and she hoped that sincerity would somehow reach Wildfire. She didn't know why she wanted her half-sibling to know the truth, except that maybe it would stop the fear of attack that hung over her pack like a shroud.
Who knew, maybe Wildfire would reverse her pack's opinion of Saena and her followers if she knew the truth behind all of it. This was all assuming the pack even knew about her. It was becoming more and more likely now that Saena had never been mentioned to them. She wasn't sure if that stung more or not; it suggested that Peregrine had never spoke of them, which might be worse.
"Just don't grow up to be as quick to judge as they are," she said with finality, frowning out over the rippling surface of the nearby lake. "Like I said, I was almost killed because my sister did something, and I bet if I got any closer than this they would try again, and no one seems to understand how that feels. It'd be like if your sister did something bad and you got blamed and punished for it. You wouldn't like it either. Maybe you'd be as angry as I was, maybe you'd lash out for the sake of it because you're treated like you tried to kill someone when you wanted to teach them something instead. Just... don't grow up to be that kind of person."
Wildfire didn't really feel reassured by Saena's comment. She was thinking that she ought to go and she even started to shift onto her feet when her estranged elder sibling launched into another soliloquy. The pup's lips pressed together and she sat, facing out across the lake, not sure if she wanted to hear any more of this vitriol. She couldn't help but listen, though, even as her amber eyes watched a few dragonflies skim the surface of the water nearby, their tubular bodies glistering like jewels. She remained oblivious to the fact that Saena stared off in the same direction, each of them looking away from the other.
"My parents don't let anyone come near our territory," Wildfire finally said, looking upward again. "It doesn't matter who are you or what you did or didn't do. If you're not part of the pack and you come too close, they will try to kill you. It's not..." What was the word? She paused awkwardly, her overstimulated brain completely blanking. Then it hit her. "It's not personal." Maybe it was, in her case, but Wildfire was pretty damn sure her parents did not make distinctions when it came to outsiders.
Twice, Saena had told her what to do: avoid growing up like her parents. Although Wildfire had felt more overwhelmed than anything during the course of this brief encounter, she now felt a ripple of resentment pass through her. Her ears splayed accordingly. She scarcely knew this woman and she had just spent the last ten minutes going on an unprecedented tirade. Now she was giving orders. Never mind that Wildfire had already demonstrated she didn't follow her parents' beliefs to the letter just by being here.
"I think I should go," the youth murmured, avoiding looking at Saena again as she rose to all fours and began to turn back in the direction of the caldera.
"It was personal then," Saena said with a sad little smile, rather oblivious to the fact that Wildfire found her talking irritating or something. Maybe she was, but she would rather inform her young half sibling of the truth than let Fox brainwash her into another, smaller version of herself. "Your dad invited me personally to teach you, and when I came for that, bam. No warning." Maybe Wildfire didn't remember a time when the caldera was open to visitors but that didn't make it any less true. Besides, Saena's friends got a warning first. Where was hers if it wasn't personal?
Wildfire dismissed herself, and the discomfort was evident then. Whether because Wildfire disliked her or didn't believe her, it was clear she didn't welcome Saena. Maybe she'd come on too strong about the girl's parents. Whatever. Her parents were both shitheads and she wouldn't apologize for how she felt about them and there was literally nothing else Saena wanted to talk about with her half-sibling. Still, with everyone and their dog at the caldera having a poor opinion of her (it was almost like none of them could even see where she was coming from), she was overcome with a desire to lessen that dislike, at least to lessen the target on her own back.
"Look, sorry for ranting about your parents. They probably do well by you. It's just hard being pushed away like I was because of another's actions and it's word vomit." Not that she would take any of it back. "Don't take it from me, I'm crotchety about it, clearly. Dante, Blue Willow and Lasher at Blacktail Deer Plateau can also tell you the whole story of your parents and Junior and myself if ever you want to know it from another source," Saena said as she herself stood, but Wildfire was already retreating, probably with poor thoughts running through her mind based on her tone. Part of her hoped Wildfire would take some of that independence of hers, seek out the truth from more than just her parents' twisted mouths, and turn out less hateful of her older half-siblings than her parents, but she somehow doubted it. Maybe they could be friends if she did that. Maybe not.
Oh well. Saena turned toward the north, having rethought her decision to go to Blacktail Deer Plateau, and only paused long enough to listen if Wildfire said anything else.
Although Wildfire was very uncomfortable and wanted to extricate herself from this encounter, she wasn't rude. When Saena spoke again, she stopped and slowly turned her head to face her. She listened to the yearling's parting words. Although she apologized, it seemed clear that Saena wanted to impress upon Wildfire that her parents were some kind of wicked. She had succeeded somewhat, having shaken the youth and instilled in her a need to question her parents to get more details.
"Okay." It was all she said before they mutually departed, trotting in opposite directions. Wildfire felt a little sick as she looped around the lake, now ignorant to the beautiful scenery. If Saena's story was true and her parents had done these awful things, yet had turned around and proved to be wonderful to their younger litter, then what had her half-sister hoped to accomplish by telling her this? Was she trying to spread discord and tear apart another family? Although she hadn't attacked her physically, Wildfire felt like she had been assaulted emotionally.
With each step away from Saena and toward home, the whole thing felt unfair all around. Wildfire felt tears well up and wobble on her lower eyelids, yet she quickly blinked them away. She just wanted to get back home, then decide how to handle the poison Saena had placed in her hands.