Wolf RPG

Back to who she was, then, hm? That was quick. Of course, it was easy to identify with who you were when you had someone to literally relate to that was, well, alive. There was a newfound pep in her step that hitched only when it occurred to her that she'd need to inform her pack of her name. "Hey, by the way, I'm Eshe, not Quill. Who cares right? To-may-toe to-mah-toe". Really, there was no need to explain. Many people had one billion of pseudonyms! ...Was she supposed to feel guilty? It wasn't a lie. She had forced herself to become "Quill", who was still her... just with a different name.

Shit was already complicated. But she wasn't about to pack up and go because of it.

Eshe traveled within the pack lands now, having been welcomed in by Harlyn and co. Her nose sought out any that wore that very scent... maybe even Harlyn herself, to give her the news. But, anyone would do in a pinch. Company was company. She lurked near the borders, waiting for @Bhreac — time to get her sibling all situated there, too. Home sweet home, right?

Bhreac wasn't overly keen to join another pack. It felt too soon, like planting flowers on a grave before it's even filled in. However, she and Eshe were the only ones left — as far as they knew — and she was going to stay with her sister at this point come hell or high water. She was curious to see what Eshe would do about her name, though. Once she cooled down about the whole thing, there was a possibility that Bhreac would be able to call her sister by whatever name she chose... but she hadn't yet reached that point.

Though they'd come to a truce, and acknowledged that they needed one another, Bhreac didn't think they'd seen quite the end of conflict between them. Still, conflict between sisters was different; they could growl and argue and bite and scratch, but she needed Eshe, now more than ever. Even if neither of them were particularly thrilled to admit it. 

Despite any strife between them, Bhreac followed Eshe's scent to where she lurked around the borders, approaching her with a wag of her tail and a nip to her sister's shoulder.

"Is there a secret passcode or something?" Bhreac asked, only a little sarcastic to cover up for a thread of nerves simmering beneath her skin. The idea that they wouldn't like her, or wouldn't want her, and she'd be separated from Eshe again was a little unbearable.

Ah, there she was. Her tail waved all the faster upon seeing the face of her sister. At her siblings approach, before Bhreac could get in much of a word edgewise, she rushed into her. "I'm going to tell them my actual name," she informed. "All of me died when I imagined you guys did. But, you're back, and, yeah." She grinned. Might as well tell her now. As for what she asked next, Eshe snorted. "Naw. Anyway, we're a package deal, so don't worry! The more legs chasing whatever we hunt the better."

Here she grinned. She wanted to quell her sisters nerves but knew it was easier said than done. It was easy enough for Quill to join... Eshe was different, in a way. This was not her familial pack from home. This would have to become a new family... or something. Whatever. "I'm sure they'll be happy to have you. They're a nice bunch."

Eshe's words brought a wave of relief rushing over Bhreac. She would do what Eshe needed — eventually — and if that was to be called something else, so be it, but the idea that Eshe would cease to exist made her heart ache. There were very few familiar things left to her in the world, and she wanted to hold on to what was left tightly.

"I'm glad," Bhreac said. "I know you thought we were all gone, but I'm not. And that's not nothing. I want you to do what you need to do to be happy — now that I'm not feeling like such a crabby, almighty bitch — but... what if there are others? And what if they end up here, and they hear about — about Quill, or whoever, and just move along, never knowing that we're here." The thought was unbearable. Bhreac planned to shout her name to all who would hear, in case anybody from their pack would stumble on this valley and know to look for them. "Our family might be gone — or... or gone, and we're all that's left. I just... our names could be important now. Like a beacon."

Shaking her head a bit and giving her tail a way, she tried to readjust, sloughing off the heavier thoughts. There was a new hope before them, and she'd follow Eshe to it, hesitant though she was. "That's good. I'd like to be part of a pack again. I think it'll just take a while to... feel like a home."

She listened to what her sister said and found a lot of logic in it. Bhreac had thought in a different sort of box than she had... perhaps due to knowing her sister had been alive all this while. Eshe, however, had believed them to all be dead, and had lived for only a month with the cruel hope and belief they were alive only to find out that no, no one was returning for her, they had all perished. To be a beacon had not occurred to her. Eshe had kept the light of her personality, but the truth of it was that her world had turned pitch black. It was only a matter of time before that darkness caught up to her...

But Bhreac truly was a beacon, her beacon, even. Eshe was disappointed in her own thought process and it was easy to see the self-reflection going on and the ultimate conclusion: I'm an idiot. Eshe herself had no cause for optimism, but Bhreac had been able to see her and thus have different hopes than she did. Eshe had given up. The longer she held on and nothing came of it, the more miserable she felt...

What a turn all that had taken.

Bhreac already knew it, but Eshe reiterated, "I didn't think that way at all." She could hardly survive thinking that way for a month when she presumed that being a beacon was pointless when you were a beacon to nothing but ghosts who would never find you. And maybe you'd find them, but only when you were dead. It was strange, because Eshe was never one to give up, persistent and stubborn herself... but death? What could one change about that? She had never imagined this... which meant maybe she ought to hope...

But if they weren't with Bhreac now, Eshe doubted it. The effects of hope were exhausting, and they took their toll... and in not hoping, she was more than pleasantly surprised by the fact that Bhreac was in fact alive. It might be cause enough for some to believe in the others...

This, she would not admit. That it was pointless to hope further. Their luck had been spent in their joint survival. Eshe doubted they had a penny left of it, and if they did, there was no way it would be heads-up. Either way, her sister had a point. On the very, incredibly (to Eshe) off chance any others had survived it... it could help. So she nodded. "It couldn't hurt" was the wrong thing to say, because it could, if none ever caught wind and ever found them... but still, Bhreac could imagine them happy elsewhere. Eshe herself would do what she could not to think of them, but Bhreac herself reminded Eshe of everyone and everything. She dealt with plenty conflicting emotions but thought it best to not deal with them right now.

As for her next words, Eshe could, in fact, empathize with that. "I know what you mean. I couldn't... I couldn't join a pack right away, right when I got here. Someone else invited me to a pack of theirs... I considered it but..." Her mind echoed Bhreac's, at that point. It was only when she heard the howl of pack that she felt inclined to sing along. She was, at heart, a pack-wolf. Truth be told she had thought it might have been Scimitar's pack, but it had not been, and her loyalties were placed down the moment she sang along and found out that none of the lot were killers or bandits. There was some measure of guilt for it, and she wondered at finding Scimitar again... before returning to the more present matter at hand. "Anyway, I heard these guys howling and... I couldn't be alone anymore. It took me a while to realize that... but it hit me when I heard 'em. And it'll be a while before... yeah. But, they're a nice bunch. Maybe it won't be easy but... it won't be the worst thing in the world." They'd already faced that, after all.

"It's a good thing," Bhreac said when Eshe admitted she hadn't thought along the same lines. "If we thought the same way, one of us would be redundant." And, as Eshe well knew, Bhreac was a wolf who liked to have a purpose. She gave her tail a wag to show that she wasn't looking for a fight, anymore, not that she'd been looking for one the other day. They were similar in many ways — both stubborn, a little rash, steadfastly loyal, but their similarities were expressed in different ways. It was hard to relate, sometimes, when their motivations were the same but their actions diverged, but then, what sisters didn't fight from time to time.

At Eshe's next words, Bhreac nodded. She wasn't as devoted to the idea of being part of a pack as Eshe was, but it didn't sound unappealing to her, although she knew she'd struggle at first to feel like little more than an interloper. She knew that the previous chapter of their life was well and truly over, but this still felt like an intermission. Like at some point, she'd find the thread to pull to unravel what'd happened, and everything would go back to how it used to be.

"Tell me about them, then," Bhreac said. "I think I met one, already, though. Riordan. He seemed alright."

Eshe wasn't sure whether to agree with her sisters first statement or not, but quickly chucked it far from her. They switched topics anyway, and Eshe knew Bhreac had meant well by it... Eshe only wished she could adopt some of her sisters beliefs. At the same time, not doing so saved her plenty of grief she presumed.

As for telling her about them?

"I was first received by a guy named Luke. Get this: he has a blue nose." She stopped for dramatic effect, eyed her sister, and went on to say, "I'm serious! I've never seen anything like it in my life..." she didn't know what to think of that perceived anomaly, but that didn't matter much, because she had quickly gathered that "He's a really nice guy. Gets right to the punch and is very welcoming. The alpha female here is Harlyn, whose also really nice and welcoming herself. There was another with her... I... I can't remember her name... And..." And Riordan, who her sister now mentioned.

Seemed alright?

Eshe was already effectively smitten with the man... but also had no idea what she felt, or how to express it. "Yes, he was there, too, quieter then..." She paused, "But very nice, also, from what I know..." and the best thing since sliced bread. Eshe felt a strange sort of jealousy, then, as she looked to her sister...

Beautiful, honestly. There was no questioning it. Not only that, but she knew how confident Bhreac was in any and all situations. Why she felt this, she was not sure; she could hardly interpret the immediate infatuation she felt for either Scimitar or Riordan for what it was.

"There is Mordecai, too, who I haven't met yet." If he was like the rest of them, they'd do fine here.

"Sick," Bhreac said, when Eshe told her of the wolf with the blue nose. Their family had some pretty wild eyes in the mix, though the gene had passed the two of them by, but she'd never seen any other part of a wolf be strikingly colored. "Let's be his best friends." It probably was somewhat less than cool to collect wolves like shiny stones, but she was mostly kidding. Still, she wanted to meet Luke, now.

Bhreac dropped to her haunches to receive there rest of her sister's explanations of the members of the pack she'd met. Though Bhreac was far more reticent to form an opinion — positive or otherwise — of other wolves than her sister was, especially after spending time in the pack that had overtaken theirs, she trusted Eshe's opinion. If her sister thought they were good sort of wolves to associate with, she'd take her word for it. Eshe's halting comments on Riordan and slightly fraught expression caught Bhreac's attention, and she raised a brow.

She hadn't had any strong feelings toward Riordan either way — she had liked him, so alright was a bit of an undersell, but then she tended to be aloof with those she didn't know until she could determine whether or not they were worth her attention, affection, loyalty, or any combination thereof.

"You liked him, particularly?" Bhreac prodded with a tilt of her head, slightly omniscient because her roleplayer is lazy as all get out.

"I'm already his friend," She proclaimed with an upturned muzzle, grinning. "I mean, it's defaulted that way." Whether Luke felt the same, who knew? But Quill was a fast friend to those that were to be her pack-mates, loyal, as it was, already. Only her loyalty to her sister could challenge that... but her commitment to Bhreac was lifelong. They shared a womb together, after all. Some siblings drifted, but never them. Then she remembered... best friends. Always (for the most part) cool with Bhreac's ideas, Eshe nodded. She was fascinated by that blue nose of his... freaky green eyes had nothing on that. Then again, she had seen dozens of those eyes, and only one of that nose.

As for her sisters probing, Eshe was immediately on the obvious defensive, huffing and puffing as though affronted. "Wha-huh? Particularly? I like him the same as anyone else," she retorted, her voice lifting in pitch and ending in a sort of question mark. She did particularly find him, and his accent, and his kindness, and his one-name, to be great. But Bhreac needn't know all that (even though she had all but admitted it). "Just as particularly as you like bugs," she snorted, effectively finished in the digging of her own grave. Damn, it was deep.

Bhreac laughed for the first time in what felt like literal years — but was probably more like weeks — at her sisters fumbling, blushing evasions of Riordan. They'd spent most of their lives surrounded entirely by family. On occasion, a stranger would pass through, or somebody would leave and return with someone they didn't know, but rarely did anybody who didn't share their blood arrive in their lands and stay for any prolonged period of time.

As such, they'd never really had any sort of crushes growing up — there just hadn't been the option, although Bhreac vaguely remembered a passerby or two who had caught their youthful, giggling attention. But no one since they'd become adults. There were lots of possibilities open to them in this valley that hadn't been available, previously. She supposed it was a good thing, but at the moment, it all felt a bit overwhelming — and she worried for her sister, whose heart was so open, when they'd both learned how much hurt strangers could inflict.

"Well, that was embarrassing," Bhreac said. "For both of us. Really, I'm so uncomfortable. Just as particularly as I like bugs? You're practically blushing. It's a little gross." She was teasing, of course. Eshe was allowed to have a crush. There was, however, a creeping desire to dissuade Eshe from bestowing her affections on those she'd just met, and maybe that was part of what she said, too.

She grimaced at her sisters response.

"Don't make things weird!" She proclaimed, her sisters laughter a bit like a sucker-punch. It was too late; she'd already done that. "Come on, you're making it awkward," she grumbled as her sister continued, pulling her lips into a thin line. "You're wrong, you're just so wrong..." She huffed, working herself into a right tizzy, tail pulling tighter against her haunch. "I mean, what would make you think that? You know? The idea?????"

Eshe quit her prattling. She kept furthering her sisters point as she spoke, but she was oblivious to it. Deny, deny, deny. The agouti woman didn't have a habit of lying, so the rare times that she did it was the most obvious thing in the world. As clear as blood-red against snow-white. And this was equally as embarrassing, too, for Eshe, who couldn't even look at her sister. Dangit. Dangit...

"Like, really! Urgh..." she huffed, looking into the distance.

"I mean anyway, I should like, get the attention of someone, right?? Not him, that's not what I mean or -- you know, to, get you into this pack. With me." What the actual...

"Holy shit, no," Bhreac said, laughing again, her tail thumping against the ground as she took great pleasure out of her sister's squirming. "I'm way too invested in this conversation to even think about derailing it. Not to mention you're a hot mess at the moment. I don't want you introducing me while you're all..." Bhreac flung her nose from side to side in a motion meant to indicate 'crazy. Super crazy. Like, very, very crazy.'

She wanted to join the pack, and she of course was going to cite Eshe as her recommendation, but it was something she sort of felt the need to do on her own. Now that there were only two of them, she felt the urge to never let Eshe out of her sight again, and at the same time felt the urge to overcorrect for what could become some pretty toxic codependency. Besides, if they were going to be on their own, at least so far as their family was concerned, they needed life skills. Bhreac had never joined a pack before — well, other than the one that had overtaken theirs, but it had been less of a joining ritual and more of a rolling over onto her back and explaining her value convincingly enough to be permitted to stay.

"You're super embarrassing right now, Eshe," Bhreac said, "no way I'm tying my first impression to that. I'll handle it later. Tell me more about the someone whose attention you're trying to get."

And squirm she did. She grit her teeth and continued to dig the sword deeper. "Hot mess? What? No," she snorted. Yes. Yes she was. Calm down. Eshe couldn't see what her sister could, but did, in fact, believe her. Because she felt hot. As in, flustered. "Wh- to me being embarrassing? I'm not being embarrassing, you're being embarrassing! Pffffsh," she took a couple of steps backward and glared at the ground, burning holes into it with the heat she felt. Oh gosh.

Attention she was trying to get? Oh, right. "Like, Harlyn, the leader, or... there's another leader. I can't think of his name." She furrowed her brow, really setting her concentration on this, as though this would prompt her sister to forget their previous topic and switch to this, all-important one.

"Forget about it," Bhreac said. "I'll handle it later. I don't want to lean too heavily on you, anyway. I have to make my own impression." It obviously wasn't anything against Eshe — she couldn't imagine her sweet, clever, terribly open sister making a bad impression on anybody, even though she babbled like none other. But if they were starting a new life, while Bhreac didn't mind being associated with her sister, she didn't want to be conflated with her. She needed to make her own first impression.

Besides, it was much more interesting to watch her sister blush and squirm. Bhreac really had liked Riordan — he was pleasant, with that odd accent and his kind face, and she could see him being somebody she trusted, eventually. But for Bhreac, trust or affection was a process. She'd always been the more reserved and serious of the two, but after everything that had happened, she felt inclined to be even stingier with her trust and affections. It worried her that Eshe seemed to fall in the opposite direction.

"So, clearly you like Riordan," Bhreac said, rolling her eyes and glossing over her sister's wittering. "I just — be careful, yeah? We've always been... you know, just us Endores. And after spending time with that other pack... You just don't know where they're coming from. Or what they're really like."

Eshe felt more than a little miserable as her sister decided against having her come along with her to be welcomed in. A frown came as she spoke on relying on her, something in later hours she would understand but presently couldn't get past. Eshe wanted to be something Bhreac could rely on, after all... and in this, she could definitely help her out! Her own impression...? What for? OK, that was mostly rhetorical. She could get that, at least, here and now... but, Eshe wanted to be by her side. "I don't think me being there would hurt any," she mumbled, looking into the distance, looking as slighted as she felt. Which wasn't a great amount. She just wanted to be there, was all.

Eshe looked back to her sister at her next words, letting out a huff. She could not convince her sister otherwise, even if it weren't true that'd be an impossible feat. When Bhreac set her mind to something, one had a .1% chance of causing that set mind to change. And frankly, Eshe didn't have the energy or the ability to do so in this instance... which was perhaps, for the most part, because it was true... whether she realized it or not. Eshe was undoubtedly in denial about it.

But her sisters sage words were squinted at. "Yeah," she accepted, but not without some measure of resistance and probing herself, "But if we're going to be, you know, pack with them... shouldn't we put ourselves out there some...?" Of course, their definition of "some" was incredibly different which the coming days would demonstrate.