With a groan, the alpha female settled herself next to a creek in hopes the aches and pains plaguing her would be soothed by lying down. Aside from her deep hidden fears and insecurities about having children, and the fact she was coming to admit this was not the life she wanted, the cramping and muscle pains were enough to make her wholly regret it. There was no such thing as comfort anymore and she was only halfway through.
She settled her chin on her forelegs, staring into the trickling water. Ice still edged the creek even though the snow was beginning to melt in the maplewood, but in the center, the current had been too much and it had cracked away. Light reflected off the remaining shards, sending a play of colours across the surface that mesmerized her. Momentarily she was able to forget about her situation, the precarious promise she had made, and the importance of keeping all of it on the down low.
A light ripple of pain across her stretching abdomen brought her back and she grumbled sourly.
Just like some other days, Esaro continues to search for plants he just couldn't figure out. He did his best to remember their location so later he could bother Spring with some questions. He was exploring the creek but has yet to come onto something of interest (or just didn't see it as interesting). He able to walk well enough with in injured paw but he still had to avoided doing heavy exercises with it. In other words he couldn't hunt well, which is the reason he spends his time looking for plants.
His exploration came to a temporary halt when he spotted the Alpha. He never got a chance to really meet her. He couldn't say he didn't really know her. He saw her at the pack hunt, meeting, and raid. He even remembers her name from Ukko. Saena. He decided to approach casually. Once the distance was around two meters he spoke "Hello. Saena right?" He asked just to confirm.
After a little look at her, he did notice a slight size difference but that didn't allow him to figure out why. Instead he had the impression that she wasn't very comfortable. "Are you feeling alright?" He said, wondering is she was ok. Even if there was something wrong he wasn't too sure if he was able to help.
Being in a good mood was rare nowadays and she had to wonder if it was healthy to be so stressed out all the time. She reflected on that as the pain abated, but no sooner did Esaro stumble onto the scene, distracting her from her thoughts. She lifted her head to watch his approach, noting his injuries and the hint of a limp, but he asked a question before she could demand to know what was wrong with him.
"Yes," she answered in a voice that was ever-so-slighly strained, though unlike everyone else in the pack, her ire was not toward Esaro. She'd already forgotten his opinion from before they sent Aaron's pack away. "As well as I can be," she responded without realizing he was unaware of her condition. By now it was obvious, not only from the changes in her body and temperament but in the very smell of her, that she was pregnant.
"The hell happened to you?" she wondered aloud, her gaze once more going to his foot.
Esaro wasn't able to shake the feeling something was happening to Saena. Due to his lack of experience there was no way for him to link that to the fact she was pregnant. He knows there was something for sure but it was going to take more than hints for him to figure it out. She said she was fine as she could be, making him wonder even more if there was something that was bothering her. Whatever it was, it did seem like she's been dealing with it for a while now.
Before Esaro could say anything about that. Saena decided to question him, pulling him far away from the subject he was wondering about. "Oh, um. I." He considered lying to her but for some reason this time he had hope that she wouldn't get angry at him. "Well, at the time I didn't know there was an agreement with the Sleeping Dragon. So when I ended up chasing prey that led me above river, then I got attacked. Now wolves who hunt above river will get killed instead." He paused for a slight second. "All I can say is that it just happend and it's just all my fault. Reek did tell everyone, I just didn't happen to hear it" He said basically explaining the whole event in a short summary.
Esaro's admission came fast, but the wolf didn't blame anyone but himself. That was good; the blunder had been his fault, after all, and Saena was hardly one to tolerate someone else's whining. Yet Esaro was lucky, for once, that the alpha female had even less tolerance for hypocrisy, regardless that she herself was very prone to it. Reek's agreement with Sleeping Dragon hadn't sat particularly well with her, if only because they were already being pretty tolerant allowing the pack to settle there in the first place, but knowing that they had changed the terms to killing her wolves boiled her blood more than Esaro's mistake did.
"They're lucky we didn't tell them to get lost," she pointed out, "and made an agreement with them instead. Let them try to kill one of our wolves. We'll remind them who owned the north first." Certainly not Sleeping Dragon. If anyone had rights to make threats, it was the maplewood pack, who had lived in the taiga for nearly a year now. Not in this one location, but nevertheless, it was interesting that a pack would settle across the river from hers and then proceed to act as though they owned the place.
"Don't go north of the river again," she advised, "but don't let a bunch of tightwads push you around, either. They don't have the right to."
He was surprised to be a little right. Saena didn't get mad, or it just didn't show it. Still she didn't start lashing out at him. He felt relieved to the point he was suddenly able to relax. But this was the first time he heard something about the pack it it's situation. That did prove that Saena really was the Alpha. She said that it was this very pack who was here first. Having encountered a hostile wolf from the Sleeping Dragon did give the impression that they owned the place.
From the sounds of it, it appeared she wanted them gone just like the other group of wolves who tried to settle. Esaro did want them gone since they were dangerous but those wolves are there to stay. These wolves would surely fight back.
"Um, okay I won't ever cross river again. Don't worry about that." But as for the other part he wasn't too sure if he could resist getting pushed around, especially if he is faced against someone who knows how to fight.
There was one thing he wanted to know, he wondered if Saena ever tried thinking of it. "Would it ever be possible for them to becomes friends with all of us?" In his voice it sounded like he already knew the answer. Even if he wanted to be friends with everyone, it wouldn't be possible if the other side didn't want the same.
She nodded, accepting Esaro's compliance and assurance as if it were law. Based on the reaction of the volcano wolves, it more or less was the law now. The alpha female felt penned in, and troubled thoughts began to dance in her mind at the idea of having the north cut off from them by a band of wolves who had made a poor decision themselves. There was no reason to do anything about it—should that pack harm another of hers, she would likely bring the war to their doorstep without giving them the opportunity to do anything about it—but until that happened, Saena was content with all of them staying below the river.
Esaro made a suggestion and she shook her head with a faint smile, as if mocking his naivety, but she meant it well enough. "Best not to concern yourself with becoming friends with those outside your home, Esaro," she advised. "None of them are friends, and I would sooner send them packing than extend a hand of friendship toward them after they launched an assault on one of ours. No, there is no chance of them becoming friends with us, because we don't make friends with our rivals, and certainly not with those who would make us enemies." By definition that was every pack wolf beyond the borders of the maplewood. They all competed for resources; that hardly made any of them friends.
Somewhere inside he still didn't want to give up hope that both packs could be friends. What has him a little worry is that it seems like one day they will have to fight. With his current skills he wouldn't be able to protect anyone. He was starting to feel a little afraid of the future. If nothing is done then would that mean a war could happen. Isn't there any way for him to prevent something like this from happening. He didn't want anyone getting hurt, not even the rival pack for what they did to him.
Right now he was more worried about his fighting abilities. "So, one day we are all going to need to fight?" He wanted someone to teach him how to fight. Ukko was the wolf that Esaro wanted to learn how to fight from but he was gone. He thought about asking Saena but she didn't seem like she could fight well with the way she was. "If that day ever comes I really want to be able to protect everyone. I want to learn how to fight but I don't think anyone wants to teach me after the mistake I made." With most wolves getting mad at him for what he has done he just started believing no one would really help him. Luna was helping him and Spring did continue to support him a bit but that felt like that was about it.
"Maybe," Saena said tiredly, as if the very topic of needing to fight was exhausting. She didn't understand his view of the world—either everyone was singing Kumbaya or everyone was fighting, at least according to Esaro, according to Saena—but he was certainly a high stress individual to believe the things he did. "I don't think it'll come to that if we just leave them alone and don't provoke them, provided they don't provoke me," she added, though she knew if it did come to a fight, her pack had a higher chance of succeeding. She had friends in the wilds, even if she also had enemies.
"Have you asked them?" she wondered, turning her head to gaze at him directly. From what little she knew of Esaro, he seemed to be an avoider. She wouldn't be surprised if he had never asked and was merely assuming. "I used to be a warden. I can't help now, but maybe when the pups are grown up a bit, I could try to help you." That would be a long way off, though, so Esaro would need to find another partner to spar with in the meantime. She almost suggested Arion, but that man was so absent around the pack that she expected him to just up and leave one day. Hell, he probably already had.
Esaro was sticking with the friend or foe idea. If he understood correctly, as long as everyone leaves each other alone then nothing could happen. It was a little hard to agree with that knowing he was attacked first and without question. He saw the Sleeping Dragon as dangerous wolves, a band of fighters to be exact. Surely with Reek and the others they would be able to defend the pack. It feels like there will be a day were Esaro was going to have to fight with everyone. When that day comes he'll need to be ready.
Saena questioned if he asked anyone. He decided to give an honest answer. "Um, no. It's kind of hard to ask after making everyone mad at me." The Alpha said she was a fighter some time ago but that it isn't possible. Esaro was about to ask why but was a little confused for a moment. "Until the pups are grown?" He said in a confused way. With one little look at Saena's body he finally put the pieces of the puzzle together. She was pregnant! That's what was! He finally figured it out. "Oh! I see."
He was left with an awkward feeling, thinking he should have figured that out a long time ago. Better now than never. "I'm going to need to learn before they are born so I can also keep them and everyone else safe. I guess I'll try to ask someone once they aren't that mad at me anymore." But he didn't know how long it would take, they might stay mad at him for a long time. Maybe he needs to try doing something good first.
"If you don't ask," Saena chided, "they'll never help you. The best thing to do is admit your mistake and learn from it." Some sound life advice that Saena herself never, ever followed. She wasn't her best adviser, but she had the potential to advise others. Even if she didn't often take her own advice, occasionally Saena proved to be more than just a hotheaded yearling. She shifted so that her hind legs splayed off to her right while she tucked her forepaws in under her chest, and then she chortled lightly when Esaro suggested he needed to protect the pups. While she appreciated the sentiment, she reminded him that, "they'll have two alpha parents to look after them. They'll be just fine.
But if you want to," said Saena, "you can help guard the den site and rendezvous site when the pups are born and get older." Reek would probably hate her for extending the opportunity to Esaro of all wolves, but she saw in him what she had always seen in Valtyr at the plateau as adolescents: potential, if they could just get past their crippling insecurities. Esaro made a lot of stupid mistakes but in a lot of ways he reminded her fondly of her red-eared friend, perhaps giving her cause to go easier on him than she often did on anyone.
"Get over feeling like you screwed up, Esaro," said Saena lightly as she stretched out on her side, lifting her head to shoot him a teasing grin. "You did, but you're pack. They won't be mad at you forever, and you need their help to succeed, so just ask."
Esaro's eyes went to the ground when Saena told him if he never asked he wouldn't get any help. In a way that was normal, no one is just going to get up and help him. Laika did want him to be more independent though, maybe the others did too. He could admit he made the mistake, kind of, it only really happend because he just didn't know. The only thing he could learn from it was to try to talk more with everyone, well that is if they trust him with information.
He nodded, Reek and her together would be enough. There really wasn't anything to worry about, those puppies would be their kids. It may not be much to do but it sounded like something he could pull off on his own. Learning how to fight would help him much more as well as knowing the important plants around. He could try studying nearby plants while on guard duty. He looked at Saena with some confidence building up. "I think I can do that. When the day comes I'm make sure the dangerous stuff stays far."
He gave her a shy grin. Yeah he messed up but he wasn't going to let that keep him down. A pack does stick together after all. "Okay, maybe I'll wait a little first but I promise I'll ask someone soon." With that said Esaro decided to go ahead and continue his search for all the strange plants around. "I'll be going now, have a nice day Saena." After that he bowed his head a little before going back to following the stream in search of plants.
It was strangely gratifying for Saena to see someone bolstered by her words. She often had the opposite effect, but Esaro seemed determined to take his new task seriously, and she believed he would. If he blundered within the confines of the maple wood, there was no doubt in her mind that she and Reek would pick up his slack, so there would be no lasting effects. It should be within the pack territory that Esaro learned to be the wolf he wanted to be, so the arrangement was fine with her, and she didn't intend to tell Reek about it until it was necessary. She knew well how he felt about Esaro.
"See you around, Esaro," she said as he bowed, and then she went back to lounging, her eyes returning to the crackling ice at the edge of the stream. A ripple of nerves, like butterflies, skittered through her belly but she paid it little mind, assuming she was just a little hungry and not yet recognizing the first signs of her pups moving within.