Mature Content Warning
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Keeping his encounter with Maude vague-
ish since the thread is ongoing.
@AdonisAfter his trip to the sea, Alexander hadn't been too interested in returning home. He'd stayed away for several days longer than necessary, wandering aimlessly and replaying the previous events over in his head. He couldn't quite understand it—didn't want to understand it—and so he'd tried to run from it. That had eventually carried him back into the comfort of Blackfeather, but he'd not stopped by to see anyone whilst there. His scent had been left behind, however, informing those within the woods that he wasn't dead. Thereafter, he'd set off once again, but hadn't gone quite as far as he could have.
Xan found himself lingering along the creek, moving in the direction opposite of the current as he followed it towards the mountains. He'd considered taking a long journey to clear his head, perhaps even visiting his place of birth, but had ultimately decided against it. The boy settled for just continuing his trek along the waterway, deciding to turn back and walk on the opposite side once the mountain's base was reached.
He did not stop as he made his way through the Teekon Wilds, resting and then rising the next morning to continue his journey. It was unclear where he journeyed to, yet it was always in the opposite direction he had come; never turning back. For now, he followed a gentle stream, towards the base of a mountain range he had not walked upon before. This was his life, never slowing. The idea of ever joining a pack once more was out of the question, for his life as a loner was far more exciting than any stupid pack could offer him. Besides, he was his own man, he did not fall behind or in line anyone else. He was not a slave, like those tethered to an Alpha, one being that held power over everyone else. It was corrupt, and Adonis would not have any part in it. Anymore.
Yet, as he walked, something caught his attention. The blur of white and a flash of red eyes and he was to say the least, captivated. The other did not see him, though his eyes rested on the other boy as he walked, seemingly in his own head. Adonis could not resist, the urge to take the man in conversation seemed to good an offer to simply let slip by. Suave reeked from his presence as he approached the other, pale boy. Yet, it was eye contact he searched for. Never before had he seen another with such red eyes, distinct as the other boy's was. He could not help but to voice his thoughts, painstakingly charming in tone.
"has anyone ever told you..
your eyes are quite captivating,"
The remark came faster than he could truly think. He was not unkind, nor too approachful, yet he let his sentence trail off to the debonair affect. His voice matched his apperance, beautiful. It was not unknown to him that Adnois's features made him a youthful charm, ultimately swayed by males and females alike. Though, only one he truly rooted for. His pale eyes met the male before him.
Submerged within his own mind, he'd not been aware of his surroundings, not entirely. He saw enough to know where he was going, and understood that the eventual turn was coming up, but aside from that he'd been wandering blind. He had to figure something out for himself, to understand what had happened and come to terms with it. He found the notion of doing so to be far simpler than the act itself, as he'd quickly found himself unable to fully wrap his brain around what was going on. He'd moved in a trance-like state until a voice had forced him to snap out of it, a defensive stance having been taken immediately after his body had ceased all motion. Queer eyes sought those of the other, attempting to read him in the same way that his father often did others, but failed in doing so; the skill was not something that he'd ever been able to pick up, much to his own displeasure.
In spite of his inability to read into the other boy, he'd managed to relax a bit. Previously tensed muscles eased up so that he didn't appear so stiff, while his gaze quickly connected with Adonis'. "No," Xan had responded with, honestly unable to recall a moment in which his eyes had received a compliment. "Has anyone ever told you that you're strange, possibly even stupid?" What type of greeting was that, anyways? "Who just walks up to some stranger and comments on their eyes? Are you trying to die?" The young Inuit was frustrated—in more ways than one—and so, of course, that frustration was taken out on the other male, rather than dealt with correctly.
His brow quirked up softly at the revelation, none had noticed the beauty of the eyes he currently stared into. While internally, he was baffled that he had not received a similar notification before, or where the wolves of the Teekon blind to such an angelic feature? Adonis had never been shy, nor had he ever stayed silent when in the presence of beauty. An alluring specimen deserved to be acknowledged, though the other pushed away his quite honest observation out of some discomfort Adonis did not understand. His acknowledgement was blunt, as was his thinking. While his flattery could be mistaken as a wooing, it was simply his choice of perspective.
"that is a shame.."
His tone came a sigh, yet not of pity, almost.. amusement. Yet, the insult did nothing to affect him, letting out a silvery chuckle at the other boy's defense. It seemed the other did not take well to compliments; it was a pity for the other well deserved them. No matter, the boy did not have to believe his blatant truth; the realization of self image was often a difficult thing to come to terms with, though Adonis had always known he was too, simply well proportionate. however, he was surprised to hear that he may as well be walking into his own death by making a remark that was clearly not taken as a compliment. "are you going to kill me?" his brow raised, the charismatic smirk did not leave his face. he was doubtful of this, or the other would not have stopped to reply. In any case, Adonis was no idiot. If the other truly wished him gone, he would do so. But somewhere beneath the striking red of the other's orbs, he seen something else. Something that he had only seen before, staring back it him in his reflection.
Xan hadn't considered it to be a shame, not really. Having never been one to receive compliments, he knew not how it felt to be spoken to so kindly, and so he could not miss it. He was used to just being there, causing trouble for his family unintentionally, and then taking his troubles out on others. That was the way in which he worked, and so the fact that his positive features had never been commented on wasn't much of a surprise. Especially so since, in the eyes of others, he probably didn't actually have any redeeming features. He simply was, and nothing more. While that did bother him to some degree, it was not because of vanity, but because he had a goal in life that could not be achieved lest he receive recognition—which is exactly what the stranger had offered to him, but in a way that had made the Inuit's head spin and stomach twist.
His indirect threat had not been taken seriously, from what the boy could tell, having caused for his eyes to narrow in response. And even though he'd then taken a step forward, he'd found himself unable to take another. "No," he'd said once again, his tone awfully blunt. "I won't kill you." But I could, he'd added silently, but there was little truth to his thoughts and he knew it. There was a burning sensation in his chest, just like how he'd always felt when angered, but this time he didn't want to sink his teeth into anything. He wanted to understand, to learn, but that desire only ever morphed into varying degrees of irritation, and all were currently being aimed directly at the stranger. "Are you just going to stand there, or what?" Xan was very busy, after all. He had both places and thoughts to avoid.
He was not at all surprised when the other male confirmed he would not kill him, he had not doubted it. Yet, the other's aggitation was one he found quite amusing. Not in the laughable way, but one that had him curious, expecting more from the other than what he let out on the surface. Had he not believed it to be alarming to ask of the boy's sexuality, he would have done so. Yet, no, there was something about the other that seemed to suppress what it truly wanted, something that the other seemed to deny himself. Whereas, Adonis had no cares. He loved who he loved, bed who he bedded, there was no line of right and wrong for he vowed never to be subjected to that kind of unethical restraint again.
yet, a slight hunch of the shoulders suggests a shrug before he replies to the other's inquiry. Adonis knew no bounds, he had no home to go to at night but rest his head upon the ground underneath his traveling feet; a new spot on a different plain every day. "i have no place that requires my attention," thought, he suspected the other's situation was not the same. He looked like he was traveling, running away rather towards, and the distinct scent of a territorial wolf reeked from his overall bodice. This was no lone wolf, thought, inside he wished he had been. Perhaps, this would be the only and last time he seen the pale boy with the beautiful eyes before he returned to his home and thought it shouldn't have, an distant ache set in his heart.
An uneasy feeling had eventually come to settle within his stomach, worsening the twisting feeling and offering to him no signs of relief. In a way, he was worried about what he might do, or what sorts of deals might come to be brokered. Always had he eyes for females, but still did his time spent at the shore have him feeling uncertain. Xan didn't want to risk bringing anymore trouble home to his family, nor did he want to lose any of them over something that he could totally help; he believed himself to be capable of suppressing whatever urges or desires that he might have, or perhaps even forcing them onto the image of another. Someone more acceptable, perhaps, someone that wouldn't put him one step closer to complete abandonment. For Xan had never been told of relations between two males, he'd only ever heard of bonds being formed between a man and a woman. Thus, he'd continued to act as he normally would, ready to lash out at any given moment.
The male had revealed to him that he had nowhere to go. Alexander assumed that he'd also meant that he had no home to call his own, which had prompted an idea to form. Surely his whereabouts and doings would be questioned upon his return, so what better excuse to have than a recruit? "If you don't have anywhere to go, then how about you come home with me?" he'd asked, unaware of what other meanings his words could suggest. For him, the query had been innocent enough, for unaware was he of how quickly conversations could turn.
His head slightly inclined, frankly, the invitation to join the walk was not one had had expected from the boy who had previously called him stupid. The recollection of that moment caused the corners of his lips to upturn, the ghost of a smirk had miraculously turned into a light but genuine smile. He had only ever acted such away once before, with a boy he had loved so long ago. Yet, those were memories he had no wish to bring up and his attention refocused to the male, and in that moment he found himself wondering why he had ever taken it away from the alluring form of a male before him. "are you sure? i would not want to impose upon your travels with my stupidity and strangeness," yet, it came with a smile that held no sign of a grudge. infact, quite the opposite. he had every intention to follow the boy the second he had laid eyes on him, and it was apparent in his gaze.
"my name is Adonis,"
the silver eyes male came to the conclusion, he could not let the other simply go. No matter how their encounter would end, he was adamant on not forgetting the beautiful eyed boy, and he could only hope the other wolf not forget his existance once he returned to his home. Adonis never settled long enough to form alliances or kinships, yet, the male before him no matter how begruding he was, had him far to curious to turn the other way. He was drawn in, and he speculated the other would come to feel the same, if he would dare to try.
For once, Xan could not meet the gaze of another directly. He could feel the other's eyes lingering on his form, burning him in a way that he couldn't describe. His paws itched to move, to leave the scene immediately before something happened, but move he could not. The boy could only stand there, wondering if his offer would be accepted, and if he'd succeed in acquiring for himself a decent alibi. Yet there'd come a question in response to his own, followed by a comment that was clearly connected to his earlier statement. There was nothing to suggest anger in his tone, however, and so the Inuit believed himself to be in the clear. "You wouldn't be imposing, I kind of need you to come along," he'd said. "You're going to be my reason for being away from home for as long as I have been." It was not a request, nor even a demand, but a simple statement. That is how things were going to go, and he'd make certain of it—even if it meant creating another deal that, in the end, might leave him even more confused.
A name was given, something to finally refer to the pale one as. It was a strange name, for sure, but he'd refrained from commenting on it. "I'm Alexander," said the boy. "But mostly I'm just called Xan." It was his preferred name, something his father had given to him. Thereafter, he'd gone quiet, a rare occurrence for him. It hadn't lasted for very long, however, for soon there'd come new questions. "Do you greet everyone like you did me? Just go up to them and give a compliment, see how far it gets you?" It was a foreign concept to him.
His smile did not leave him, thought as he listened to the male he could not help but to hang on to every word he said, his own silver eyes unbreaking from the other though the other could not meet his gaze. It occurred often in his presence, and even more so by the power of a simple compliment that could mean so much more if one dared to believe.
"alexander,"
the name rolled off his lips, yet, he was overcome with a sense of awe. It was a regal name, handsome, fitting for the male before him. Alexander, Alexander, Alexander. It was a name he could not forget, even if he wanted to. Yet, the next row of words came what seemed, too long after, both had settled in a silence that spoke volumes they both could not understand. Adonis was honest, above all qualities, and the inquiry was no exception, no matter how much the causal question made him rethink the barriers he had put up before their encounter.
"you are simply beautiful.. there could be no harm in letting you know," he stepped forward without a thought, no mind to how the other may react, for it was a controversial statement with many meanings behind it's various suggestions. "but no, you are different," while he often made blunt observations, he had never stuck around to receive a reply, not like he was doing now for he could not bring himself to break away from the conversation even if he wanted to attempt it. There was but little time to spend with the beautiful eyed boy, he knew, before their time would run out and Adonis would move on as he always did. In any case, Alexander was different in many ways. He was the only one Adonis had felt drawn to in some while, yet not all strangers challenged him the way the other did. It was, in many ways, refreshing. While ladies and men alike would swoon and fall at his heels, the other boy did not. It was a great mystery to him, one he was bent on solving.
Having heard his name roll off of the other's tongue, a shiver had threatened to creep down his spine. He'd subdued the tremor, but hadn't been able to stop it entirely, which was something he was quite annoyed by. Originally, he had thought that it would have been a good thing to escape the confines of the woods and venture to the sea, but being there had unlocked something within him. A desire that wished to consume him, urges that he had troubles fighting. He had to keep reminding himself that it wasn't right. That no matter what his body and subconscious wanted, he could not risk his family by acting so selfishly. Thus, he'd hidden it, for he could not vanquish it. The previous, involuntary trembling of his body had been covered up by a quick shake of his coat, acting is if some of the water from the creek had splashed up onto him.
There came the answers to his questions soon after, and this time he'd had a difficult time keeping himself in check. He'd swallowed, his lack of knowledge on the situation having resulted in him growing nervous. And when a step had been taken in his direction, he'd found himself unable to hide the buildup of nerves. "You can't say things like that," Xan had stated, his voice sharp and the fact that he was on edge obvious. "You can't call another boy beautiful, it's not– it doesn't work like that!" Right? Honestly, he didn't know anymore. He wanted something other than what he'd grown thinking was normal, and finally had the thought started to wear away at the mental barriers he'd put up. "If anyone nearby hears you, they'll think something's going on here." But would that really be a bad thing?
He had not been refused before, at least, not in the way Alexander did. It seemed it was not only his deny of affection but also the lack of education which made the other turn away. Did he not know that times had changed, there was no strict boundary for love, no right nor wrong when it came to the desires of the heart and body? Yet, it had him wondering, had the other been raised in the kind of pack that had taught him the body was for a male and a female, there could be no flicker of passion between those of the same gender, as he had been taught as a child. Yet, he uttered the words he had used to defy his elders, "why not?"
it was a simple question, though with so many answers even Adonis himself could never form the words properly to covey how he felt, but when the time came he would do it justice. Instead, he did did so with action, not to fluster but to prove a point that no words could. He stepped forward, closing the space between them before moving on; running his nose through the other's pale coat as he walked on. The action did something to him as he knew it would to the other boy. But he did not stop, tracing the other's hip bone as he made his way to the other side, his nose never leaving but inhaling the scent of the beautiful eyed boy named Alexander. He stopped where the other's peripherals could strain to see him leaning into the other's ear. "does that not feel right, alexander?" adonis did not care for the clouded opinions of others who did not understand the way he felt, and would never. It was why he roamed, alone before he found the boy before him with the storm filled yet beautifuol eyes.
Why not?
The question had him stumbling over his own thoughts, trying to piece together exactly what made it wrong. It hadn't felt wrong being with the stranger at the shore, but that was there and this was here. His home was close by, his family within walking distance. They could come searching for him, they could find him, and then he'd be cast out. Where such thoughts stemmed from, it was unknown, for he'd never been told growing up that it was wrong for two males to want something more than a friendship from one another. However, he also hadn't been told that it was right, or even told of it at all, for that matter. It was assumptions that led him to think the way that he did, and, unbeknownst to him, each one was wrong. He'd not be thrown aside and abandoned, he'd not be looked down upon, he would simply remain as he'd always been. This, however, was not a conclusion he could draw. "Because it just isn't," Xan had shot back, words strained. It bothered him to realize that he could produce no better answers, but, perhaps, that would eventually assist him with coming to terms with reality.
Without much warning, the space between them had been lost. The other's nose had started tracing its way along his body, much the same as had been done to Maude days prior. When his hips had been neared, his body betrayed his words as he'd grown aroused. And when his touch was no longer there, he'd found himself wishing that it be returned, but was met only with words. Spoken in hushed tones, warm breath fanning out over his ear—nothing about Adonis' doings had made it any easier to resist him, instead drawing the albino to a point that he'd felt himself almost incapable of turning back from. "No," he'd said anyways, shifting uncomfortably. "It doesn't feel right." It was an obvious lie, one that even a child could probably see straight through. And as if to make that clearer, he'd unconsciously leaned towards the other pale body, seeking out the contact that had been taken away from him.
Once again, the boy refused not him but the very idea of the passion that flowed between them, relenting against the concept that their encounter was so much more. Oh, how Adonis itched for the contact of the other, and it was granted to him as the boy unconsciously leaned towards him, barely touching though the millimeters distance seemed to far away. A breath was let out, ragged, yet it did not come from the other but himself. This surprised him, he had never faltered in his cool exterior of suave emotions. Never, not once. Perhaps this male had more of an effect than the usual's had, his own skin turned aflame at the close proximity of the other. He wanted more.
"but you do not push me away," it was an observation rather than a statement but it was the truth all the same. "in fact, i think you seek quite the opposite," now this, came as a suggestion though truly, it was a taunt. Adonis longed to take the other as his, though could not, for perhaps the other was not quite ready for that kind of ambition. Yet, he could not help himself. Adonis had never shuck loose the ambition to have what he wanted, for he had never been denied before. Alexander, was a challenge, one he was more than ready to conquer. In a swift motion, Adonis does not second guess as his forearms hook over the shoulders of the male before him. Yet, he does not go any further, waiting to see first if his actions are truly unwanted. Adonis' desire is one that has never been tamed before, but Alexander was a prize, something he was not ready to loose for the sake of relief.
It was true that he'd not pushed the other away, that much he'd been aware of. But the closeness he'd sought was realized only after a comment had been made on it, and he'd corrected his posture in response. He had nothing to prove to the male, but to himself, instead. It wasn't what he wanted, he'd thought, but the longer he spent with the ghostly figure the more he doubted himself. Maybe it was something he wanted, but if that was the case, then what did it mean for him? Was he destined to be forced from his family and, if so, for what? He knew he couldn't necessarily control himself, but he could avoid confrontation. He could return home and never leave again, seclude himself from the temptation of another male's touch. It was a thought, yes, but something he'd considered himself to be fully capable of. Well... he had, but then he'd felt the weight of the other on his shoulders and all sense of reason was stripped away.
If even possible, he'd grown more aroused by the act. "You..." he tried to say something, but the words were quickly lost. Xan's voice died away and a low growl started to grow within his chest, but he'd not pulled away. He had to know if it was something that he actually wanted, or if the sea wolf had just been a special case; he'd told himself this, trying to believe that it was the only reason for his stillness, but deep down he knew that not to be the case.
There was no moment to break away, no inclination that suggested Alexander did not desire Adonis' advancements, but a failed reply Adonis knew was halted by the unassailable longing he knew the other boy had for him, if he would only acknowledge it himself. Yet, in that moment, Adonis knew he had won; Alexander had put up a barrier he would never understand, but what he truly desired was simmering on the surface, and only Adonis' actions would ignite the same passion he wished to see from the boy as he gave to him. Slowly, he made his way over the boy, draped across him so that the other by be truly beneath him. His forelegs hooked and settled on the shoulders of the boy, his hinds moving around, positioning on either side of the other boy's hind legs. Their stance did not need to be foretold, it had been inevitable since their introduction only now Adonis felt the satisfaction of the other's want.
In a blur of a moment, he was within the boy, overcome with a feeling he had not felt before with previous lover that had not meant anything to him. He felt bliss, though it was met with a fiery urge to continue, to take the boy beneath him like had not not taken anyone before. his forearms grasping at the nape of the beautiful ivory boy beneath him in a frenzy of desire though his movements did not once become sloppy. He was a creature of eloquence, and though Alexander drove him mad with lust, he did not falter in his actions. His heart rate had elevated, taking a moment to hold himself within the boy so that he may collect his nerves before proceeding, his eyes nearly closed with the feeling of libido he could not overcome.
finally, he could not take it. He moved within the other, every mere action he held onto like it was his last, his hips meeting the other's backside with a fervor he could not understand. "you are mine, alexander," he snarled a passionate claim, grabbing on to the other's nape with his jaw for he could not steady himself, the heat between them was growing uncontrollably with every thrust of his hips. His hips buckled ever so often, yet his pace increased, every inward action causing him to release a bit of the breath he had been unaware he was holding. But his head was swimming in the euphoric feeling of a closeness he had not felt in some while, one that he had no intention to end any time soon.
Roles had been reversed, he'd known it to be so the second the other had began adjusting himself. Unlike with the sea wench, he was not the one meant to give this time, but the one made to receive. The idea unsettled him, made him nervous, but he couldn't bring himself to stop the happenings to come. A part of him wanted it, and badly, but another part of him was still unable to grasp exactly what he wanted. He didn't wish to lose his family, not over the doings of a stranger, but he couldn't contain the eager feeling that burned within his groin. It was the first thing that he'd desired so badly that it almost felt as if he needed it, and, right then, he'd decided that he wasn't going to let his fear of the possibilities prevent him from receiving it.
Alexander had been given little time to prepare before the other's entrance was made, resulting in a yelp of surprise—it was a sound that he'd long since forgotten that he was capable of making—having slipped past parted lips. It was followed by a near silent whine, pain having been felt, but soon ignored as the motions of the act were carried out. His tongue had found its way out of his mouth, panting ensuing in an effort to relieve his body of the increasing heat. Yet never had he cooled down, skin feeling almost as if it were burning beneath his coat. And as the motions slowed, he'd thought an end was being reached, but never had the other retracted himself. He'd remained there instead, urging the albino to shift in an effort to get him moving again; whether it was because of this or not that Adonis had picked up his pace, Xan didn't know for sure, nor did he really care. He was just relieved that he'd started back up, his previous worries having retreated to the recesses of his mind.
Words came, riding out on a snarl that made the beating of his heart increase. It'd taken a moment or two for the statement to register within his mind, attention being far from speech, but once it had he'd issued a growl of his own. "I'm no one's," he'd retorted, his words coming out breathy, rather than with the harsh tone he'd been aiming for. For Xan, however, that did not make the statement any less true.
He did not slow, though the tension only increased. His movements had become somewhat raw, the eloquence he once carried was shedding away by the second. He not longer cared, but absorbed by the feeling of the boy beneath him. Yet, Alexander's words found away of clearing his conscious of the desire that clouded his proper thinking. And still, he could not help but to disagree. A growl resumed in his throat, his eyes narrowing with a lust filled defiance he did not understand. "no ... in this moment, alexander, you are mine," with that, he bit down harder against the soft scruff of the other's neck. you will always be mine, though he did not say it, it was clear to him. Alexander was too good to let go, there was a distinct disgrace in letting such a treasure slip from his grasp; he could not let it happen.
his thrusts only quickened when he felt the edge drawing near, creeping up on him through he haze of pleasure that only seemed to increase. He did not sing sweet nothings to the boy beneath him, it was not needed. Their very actions were a song in itself, the melody keeping him going even as he reached the peak. A shudder of pleasure coursed through him as the high came, though he did not stop, his thrusts paceful yet returning to it's former eloquence. He wished there to be a release for the boy to, as his body had brung Adonis. Yet, Even as he slowed, he could not bring himself to fully extract from the boy, even if he could. Adonis had never felt the need to stick around after such affections transpired between him and a lover, yet an unknown force of the heart demanded him to stay, while curious to the aftermath of their love-making. While he had prepared his mind to depart, and venture their separate ways, he could not for he knew that he could only look at Xan the way he would another lover and leave, for he was not. Alexander had unknowingly captivated the man above him, to the extent he did not pull away, even when the exhaustion faded and he had the will to pull his weight off the other male. He had no wish to break away from the moment where he had been the most happy he had been in a long, long while.
Xan was not used to being submissive, having always believed himself to be the greatest. He was a borderline narcissist, through and through, and yet his resolve had falter when a growl had sounded from behind him. The words that'd followed had not ignited the same desire to attack as they once would have, offering to him another new experience. He did not want to sink his teeth into the other male, to tear from him however much flesh that he could manage; not even after he'd felt the grip on his scruff tighten did he have an urge to cause actual harm. It had made him shut up, though, suggesting that he'd accepted the claim placed over him. Yet, in the back of his mind, he still had not. No one could have him, not entirely, for he'd never allow for every inch of himself to be known.
A breath had hitched in his throat the moment the other had experience his release, the sensation entirely foreign and not at all something he'd been expecting. And while normally something like that would have caused for his entire form to go rigid, he'd only been able to feel something similar to relaxation. Every muscle in his body had eased, the other's release having set off a chain reaction, ending with Xan's own. His body had trembled from the feeling of it, and so it'd come as a shock once he'd realized that their coupling had yet to cease. Blunt claws had been forced into the dirt, toes spreading and then pulling back together as some sort of traction was sought after. And though the motions had eventually ended, the male had not pulled himself off. The Inuit had kept still, for the most part, until irritation started to set in. "Get off," was all he'd managed to say, legs demanding a moment of rest. There was also another matter that he wanted to bring up, but felt himself at too big of a disadvantage to be doing so given their current positions.
He did not refuse as he slid off the the other's back, landing on his own in a daze he could not shake loose. Yet, his breaths soon returned to normal, his expression returning to the classic suave smirk he never carried without. The last few moments of their coupling replayed in his mind, lingering on the moment they had fully become joined and the heated actions after. He held this feat in some high regard, for never had he had to work that hard to get what he wanted, for he had hardly come across another that had outright refused his advancements before. It was refreshing in a way, yet he would not have it for long.
His eyes returned to Xan, his head tilted upwards for his gaze to fully meet the others. He had the slightest feeling their would be words soon, yet, he did not interrupt; silent for he had no wish to possibly scare the other away with his recollection of their love right after their actions began to fully set in. Adonis felt no regret, though the claim he had taken over the male was something of a serious matter. The words had been uttered in the moment, yet Alexander had stayed silent, leaving the silver eyed male to assume he accepted the idea, one that even Adonis had not thought through properly. He was a nomadic creature, leaving no ties to where he rested yet their mere encounter seemed to change everything.
The demand had not been fought against, the weight from his back having disappeared gradually. For a moment, he'd only slumped forward, recollecting what thoughts had once been lost. When he'd righted himself, his eyes had found their way towards the other, shamelessly trailing up along his underside before meeting his own gaze. His lips had lifted then in a silent snarl, offering a threat, but knowing that he had no way of truly backing it up. For even if he'd wanted to attack, he knew he wouldn't get very far, unable to risk bringing harm to someone capable of providing him with such warmth. "You won't tell anyone about this," the boy had stated. His tone had suggested that he didn't want an argument, but, honestly, he was in no position to be doling out commands.
Without having thought much of it, he'd lurched forward then, aiming to position himself over the other male. His intentions were only to pin him, to keep him from leaving despite a little voice in the back of his head having insisted that his doing so wouldn't be an issue. The ghost would remain, Xan wanted to believe, but he didn't trust his assumptions. Thus, if permitted to do so, he'd bring his body down upon the other, chest pressed against his own so that he might better control the situation—if that was even possible at this point. "Call me Xan," he'd then said, eyes narrowing. He'd not had the opportunity to correct him thus far, much to his displeasure. For as thrilling as the name sounded on Adonis' lips, it was still one that the boy felt disconnected from.
He had expected it, the demand to never speak of their lust filled encounter, for he had known perhaps the boy above him was not ready to face a certain reality. That did not mean it stung any less. He grimaced as the words left the other's mouth, the tone he had heard countless times before. For to long, he had kept his own desires a secret, and now for the sake of a love he did not understand, he kept that secret again but for another. It was a feeling he had vowed never to feel again, yet he did so anyways, for he knew exactly how the other felt. He had felt it before, a reason why he settled for no home where he could potentially be subjected to it again. Yet, his grimace was kept beneath the surface, instead a shake of his head and his eyes turned away was his response to the request. "of course not," his mouth felt dry, the words slipping through his teeth for he could not make an effort to properly face the boy with his answer. for the sake of Alexander's reassurance, a reassurance he did not need but a comfort in the same, he would keep silent.
yet, he turned his thoughts away from the perilous request, and to the heat that once again simmered between them. Alexander's chest splayed upon his, in some attempt to regulate a control they did not have. It was ironic, laughable but yet he did nothing of the sort. If it was what the other needed to feel assured, he would comply, once again. It was unknown to him why he felt the need to bend his own moral rules to fit the other, though he had an inkling. He seen a ghost of himself in the boy resting above him, one he had come to terms with long ago. Yet, he refused to turn the mood sour for the sake of his own inner emotions, returning his expression to the suave smirk and suggestive grin he was hardly without.
"i think i quite like this position," he winked. it came off in a smug glib, his eyes and tone taunting the other though he knew perhaps it was not the time for such suggestions. In truth, it was a way to ignore the request of calling his beautiful eyed catch by a pet name. Adonis quite liked the name Alexander, rather than calling the red eyed boy a name everyone else called him. Somewhere, though he knew they had just met, Adonis wanted to be something different to be boy, rather than the run-of-the-mill blue eyed stranger. He would be the one to call him Alexander, a name of regal fortitude the other deserved. Yet, if it was his true wish, he would comply
Perhaps if he'd been better at reading others, at judging what they were feeling by something as small as a twitch of their lips, he'd have known of the trouble he was causing. He might have understood the complexity of his request, as well as how his words had made the other feel. Xan, however, was oblivious to most things that did not relate directly to his own feelings. He was satisfied by the agreement to keep quiet, honestly believing that things would be better that way. As long as no one saw them, and neither male spoke of their affairs, then the boy would be able to live within his home just as he'd always done before. There would exist no risk of him being banished; there was a chance, also, that he might remain forever unaware of just how wrong his assumptions were if he'd never speak of his activities. If another were to tell of his doings, his newfound interests, then maybe life might turn out better for him in the long run. It was a possibility that he could not bring himself to consider, though, and so silence would continue to be requested until some sort of indirect reassurance was made.
The thoughts of what could be were far from the boy's mind, much preferring that the present be focused on. Yet, when he'd witnessed a smirk morph into a grin, he'd considered allowing for his mind to wander off to a better frame of time. One in which he was not draped over the chest of a male he hardly knew, where he'd not feel an increase in temperature in response to words alone. His demand was forgotten in that very moment, a glare filling out his features. "If you like it, then I don't," the Inuit stated, pulling himself up to his feet. Though he still lingered over him, no direct contact was made. Alexander simply stood there, glaring down at him as if to prove a point—or maybe it was some sort of challenge.
The returning tone of the other was not the affect he had wished, yet another thing about the boy he did not understand. Yet, all the same, he replied with an unwavering ease. "don't be mad, i enjoyed our time together," the very thought of their bonding put a light smile in his features, the polar opposite of the other's expression. While the other still hovered over him, it was not in the way Adonis wished. What he wanted was for Alexander to accept it, to return the affections Adonis had so freely given him. Yet, it seemed so unlikely that, by any miracle, that would occur any time soon. It was something he could not truly bring himself to accept, but he knew all the same, he would need to for it was clear he was unwanted; a feeling he had not felt since his initial departure from the place that had turned their backs on him.
"yet i assume you no longer wish for me to follow you," his sentence trailed off, the bitter reality of his forth comings finally bringing it's toll. But he did not regret it, not for a second. Even if it meant never laying eyes on the boy again, at least he could remember the lust filled moments they shared, rather than a journey that only resulted in a bittersweet departure. Though, while had acknowledged Xan's attitude was simply his way of communicating, he knew there was a line, one Adonis had crossed in the heat of the moment, one Xan seemed to regret. He would understand,however, for it was time for him to move on as well, if that was what the other truly wished. Yet, he could not deny, it stung in his heart the tiniest fraction, knowing his presence was no longer desired; more than he had with any other hookup. It was odd, far from heart break yet just enough to render him affected.
Xan felt conflicted, his arrogance telling him to leave without so much as another word, whilst his body longed for him to stay. Though he'd never admit to it aloud, the other held some sort of an effect over him, as was discovered the moment he'd smiled. It was unlike the time in which he'd tried so hard to get Kendra to smile, the tightening of his chest having been a different sort than what he'd recalled feeling so long ago. "I'm not mad," he'd muttered, albeit a bit begrudgingly. It wasn't anger that he felt, per se, but some degree of irritation and, as always, confusion. There was a war raging on within him, two sides of him that wanted opposing things. It had been unclear from the very beginning which faction would prove to be triumphant over the over, his conscious having cared little about offering its support to either. And though very, very deep down in however small of a heart he had he knew that he couldn't live with himself if he'd just up and left, the steadily beating organ was not permitted to weigh in, either.
Ears pushed forward and head tilted slightly, listening to his words and then responding with a shake of his head. "I didn't say that," he'd noted, shifting his weight in the process. "Do you want to follow me? Live with me?" The questions were serious ones, as was his expression. Slowly, one side of the grand battle was beginning to prevail, and while he was loathe to admit it just yet, he'd found himself somewhat happy about that. The idea of hiding a stranger away within his home, of keeping for himself a secret that no one else was welcomed to learn of; it was something that could very well result in him getting into a great deal of trouble, and yet, he didn't care.