A tear rippled the image reflected on the small puddle that had former on the beach's floor, it had been probably been made by a large animal's paw, was it another monster's pawprint? Was it a real monster this time?, she wondered as she watched the waves on the water's surface bend and distort the featured of her face until only an unrecognizable blur of beige and white swirled across the surface.
She pulled her face away as another tear threatened to slip from her eye. Why was it that the sea made her cry? Why did the brusque crash of the waves against the sand cause her heart to wilt? Why couldn't it be soothing or placid for her to listen to the sea's gurling?
Why couldn't she be friends with the ocean?
Their relationship had been broken the second the harsh hands of the waves tried to pull her head underwater. It had happened about a week ago, she had dipped her body into the sea's mouth to cleanse her fur from all the accumulated filth with the salty water, but just as she tried to get the water to caress the top of her back, a vicious wave had wrapped itself against her neck, plunging her under the water and entering her nostrils with a fiery burn.
She had almost died that afternoon. She had barely managed to crawk out of the water, her coat heavy and her eyes stinging. She had not felt better until every content of her stomach had been spewed over the sand.
Was she always meant to be so hollow?
Caiaphas had been busy of late; like a wraith she committed herself to the lost region, deadbent on discovering and familiarizing herself with every aspect of the province. The dominion of Stavangar had been thoroughly explored after her meeting with Ragnar -- but she had deliberately made a promise with the alpha she had elected not to deliver.
She had half the mind to take advantage of their cache -- it was likely a 'packmate' would not challenge her for being there, and her gut was practically snarling with hunger. The fish she had nicked from Autumn had been scarcely enough to tide her over the travel -- the long trek from the mountains to the sea had left her irritable and famished.
Drawing closer to the Bay she adopted a stealthy trot with her streamlined and lanky body elegantly pressed close to the earth; her savagely thin muzzle held low and her fierce yellow eyes outward. She would have stolen right into the Bay's fold were it not for the form of a wolf she saw ahead. Crestfallen but electing to disguise her emotions, she stalked towards the wolf purposely. The female was unknown to her, a pale agouti thing that looked about as healthy as the drowned raccoon Caiaphas had discovered that morning. She even looked sickly; Caiaphas inspected her carefully, drawing close without fear. When they were within several feet the coywolf stepped into the water, saying nothing as she watched and awaited the fellow creature's reaction.
Mirror, mirror on the beach's floor, tell me who's the saddest of them all, she whispered as another tear rippled the small puddle's surface. She tried to remember a day when she could truly say she had been happy, but none came to mind. Her life had been filled with tragedy and sadness since her mother had died on her. She had been rescued by a pack only to be thrown into the dungeon of another as she tried to get out. Even if now she was technically and legally a free wolf, she had no place to go. The prison had become her home sweet home.
A moving crest of white foam reached the corned of her eye, she turned her head to see the tide was rising, soon the ground she stood on would be reached by the oceans fingers and her puddle would become nothing but a dent under the water's surface. She gave a resentful look to the ocean and decided to take a step back in precaution.
It was then that another fugure entered her peripheral view, a gaunt silhouette dipped in black. Claire's golden orbs settled on the wolf's face as she entered the water with a defiant look in her face. The pale girl looked at her for a long minute, wondering if the female was there to clense her fur as she had once tried to. "Aren't you afraid?"she barked with bewildered eyes, as if expecting for a huge wave to suck in the dark female and drag her to the bottom.
The stare-and-wait routine was all a game to Caiaphas -- occasionally, it earned her some seriously resentful aggressors. Luckily she was fleet creature and there were admittedly a few times that her chasers came dangerously close to overcoming her.
But the wolf that stood before Caiaphas did not seem aggressive -- if anything, she seemed the opposite; meek and incredibly malleable. This was an attribute that attracted Caiaphas; there was nothing more she liked than manipulating and taking advantage of a wolf who was too dejected or insecure to fight back. Caiaphas stepped closer with her head tilted as the female asked her if she was scared -- scared?. Caiaphas paused, casting a cold glance towards the edging depths. She was careless; a roll of her shoulders was supplied as if it was an adequate answer
"Afraid of what?" She rejoined, her chin jutted out in youthful defiance. "The squid? Sharks? Jellyfish that drag you under and suffocate you?"
Describing Claire as malleable wasn't exactly right. While it was true that she had been used as a dirty ragdoll while the title of captive still hunged over her, the skinny girl had more courage to stand for herself once her imprissonment was over. If there was a word that fitted her better (at least in her gloomy imagination) was disposable. As one of the weakest (both physically and emotionally) Claire often had the feeling that if times of troubles ever reached the Bay, her head would be the first to roll. She was almost sure that if it weren't for Beric, the Viking pack would've already disposed her in the cold.
Her golden orbs danced in the other's face, she didn't understand what she was trying to prove. Either way she kept watching as the waves crashed softly against the woman's leg. She envied the way she could just stand in the ocean without fearing for her life, she envied her friendship with the sea; but most of all she envied her fiery courage.
When she answered, with a mocking tone and narrowed eyes, Claire simply shrugged her shoulders and lowered her ears. Jellyfish weren't the monsters she was referring to. "Not the jellyfish."she barked with a small frown pulling down her delicate features,"I mean of.. drowning." she murmured while flicking her tail. It was not that Claire didn't know how to swim, because she did. She was not afraid of the water but of the lack of oxygen when your head went under.
The coywolf tilted her proud muzzle to the side as the wolf fussed; instinctively she leaned in and licked her pistol-thin jowls. Her sordidly yellow eyes remained ablaze with curious intensity.
The frown that pulled at the petite she-wolf's muzzle was met with a simpering grin from the insouciant and jilted coywolf. She retracted if only slightly, a tight breath expelled as she contemplated the question.
"The water?" She pawed at it carelessly, one torn ear pulled back as she issued a derisive snort. "Are you afraid of boulders or trees falling on you?" Her voice, while tinted slightly with incredulity, did not hold any hostile remark. "If you live your life in fear you will never accomplish anything." She spoke matter of factly -- and with a joyous shriek she plunged into the water.
An audible clench of her teeth was all Claire offered as the other female stared her down, even if she wasn't looking up at her she could feel the girl's yellow eyes pierce through her skull and into her brain. She didn't feel like confronting the femalee or even arguing, she had merely asked a question to know if her fears were shared by others --which apparently they weren't.
Maybe that's because you've never felt life wrap its fingers around your neck, she said in her mind as the other scoffed to her question as if being afraid of drowing was the stupidest thing she had ever heard.The pain of not being able to breathe was far too real, and it was a possibility that coud capture even the best swimmers. Even if she had never had an expirinece like such while swimming, she had felt herself suffocate in land --the day she tried to prod her dead mother into waking up for example.
Even though she wouldn't dispose of her fear so easily, she listened to what the girl had to say. She had a point of course, if she lived with fear she wouldn't be really living; instead she'd be letting fear live in her. "It's still frightening to feel you could drown"she murmured as she watched the girl splash around happily.
The sea doesn't care for me either way, she thought quietly as followed the wave's movement with her eyes for a moment.
The dissident coywolf thrashed around in the shallow depths of the salty water, nipping sharply at each foamy wave-crest that lapped past her. She sneezed and wrung her head as the salt assaulted her tongue -- instantly she retracted and turned back to the somber, fearful wolf.
She tread through the frothy water until it was scarcely above her pasterns -- all lathered were they by iridescent white spume. The girl spoke again, perhaps to justify her fear -- and Caiaphas shot her a disapproving scowl.
"You'll die eventually. By drowning, a hoof to the skull, or whatever the gods have arranged for you. No sense in fretting." Once more her voice seemed fairly matter of fact, but it lacked any sort of derision or malice -- she was, in short, being somewhat pragmatic. "If you are so afraid of the sea why are you here?"
While the spunky girl continued to trash her legs around the foamy skirts ofthe sea, Claire figeted her paw against the sand, making circles and lines with the tip of her toes. Finally she heard the girl's squeals die out and again she saw the small-framed dark female turn her attention to her again.
Claire's golden obs fell onto the ripples of white foam crash softly against the other's legs. She wished she could put her fear past her and dip her toes in the relaxing water, but she couldn't help but think of the day her head had gone under and the burning sensation the salty water left on her nose and mouth. She wished too , she could walk with her head high, without fearing rejection or abandonment. She wished she could talk to other packmates as easily-- but she couldn't, because in her mind she was still a slave. Not to Ragnar but to her own misery.
Despite looking younger, the little black female spoke the truth, one that as cynical as it might seem, it was correct. She knew there would be a day she would not rise, that like her mother she'll stay on the ground, slowly loosing her body heat and the rythmn of her heart. There would be a day that her skin would be cold and her eyes would be empty --and the female in front of her would eventually do that too. "I know.. I just don't wanna die in the water" she confessed. In her opinion dying of suffocation was probably the worst death there was.
When the other questioned why she wandered around the beach if she feared so the ocean so much, the beige colored girl slumped her frail shoulders and gave the female a vavant look"Because I wanted to make peace" she barked. Although knowing the dangers the waved carried she found a certain charm on the ocean that lurred her in.
The notion of making peace with the inhospitable mother ocean sounded positively absurd to the dark-masked girl. She flickered her tail and cast a look out into the enduring sea, indomitable and unclaimed. "Drowning is the easiest death there is." She interjected, casting a sidelong glance to the paler companion. "Why, I've put many in that position myself." A rueful smile played on her features as she recalled the seal she had drowned on that very shore two days prior.
"First you struggle a little but before you know it you're dead and going off to whatever afterlife your religion has deigned for you." She pivoted and strode confidently towards the female with her head held to a haughty height and the look in her eye questionable. "Death is not the worst to happen to wolves." She proffered a smile neither generous or whole.
Regardless of what the other would think of her explanation, the light colored female stood firm on her spot, though she held her head low and her shoulder blades slumped, she didn't feel ashamed of wanting to love the sea. She understood that she could never control the waves, that no matter how well she swimmed there would always be uncertainty and danger lurking below the waves, laced in the bubblings ripples of white that crashed against the sand, singing a melody that was both beautiful and tragic.
Again the foolish female opened her mouth, shamelessly admitting that she did not fear drowning but that she had drowned others. Outraged, Claire opened her mouth and pulled her face away as if she was being held underwater in that very instant -- though she tried to erase it, the image of the female's pistol-thin jaw pinning her under had been tattooed to her mind.
"Shut up."she pleaded with a weak snarl, she didn't want to hear anything else the girl had to say. She didn't want anything to do with her anymore, she was a monster. A monster that had crawled from the deepest pits in the ocean to make her feel miserable. Though Claire didn't have any specific religion or concrete dogma, she did believe in evil and ghosts. "Go drown then" she hissed while trying to fight back a hot tear from rolling down her cheek. She hadn't asked for her company. With that said, the skeletal looking girl casted a last glance at the sea and at the little devil that crawled out of it. Today she might've not killed her fear of the ocean, but she had killed the fear of speaking up for herself.
no worries - throwing a last post in here! feel free to respond or i can archive it in a week.
Caiaphas smiled a positively malicious smile as the female countered her brief speech with a weak snarl -- it was obvious she had gotten a rise out of the female and Caiaphas, in this instant, felt very superior.
Despite the inciting words Claire uttered, Caiaphas was dilatory in her response. The female's puny rebuttal, coupled with the meek desperation of her feeble insult, only served to rejuvenate the wretch's melority.
"Sure, let's drown together." She replied sharply, sending a vicious smack to the water with a front paw in the hopes to splash the female with the very ocean she reviled. With a cackle, she trotted off down the shoreline to depart Claire's reluctant company.
