Wolf RPG

Coping with Jinx's death wasn't easy and Ira wasn't even sure he was coping. The stage of denial had long since passed — there was no denying that the only mother he had known was dead. His curse, too, had taken her from him and the worst part for Ira was dealing with the knowledge that they had been on bad terms when she had departed from the world of the living. That he hadn't been there with her. Ira hated being so vulnerable, hated that he could not close himself off as he had any other time. Hated to admit that he was lost. He did not have Jinx, or Bones, or even Lecter. He had never been so alone. Secluding himself off had been one thing but looking around and realizing that he had no one left. No one that he loved. Nothing that he felt an attachment to anymore. Thus, he was left to linger in the festering consequences of his behaviors; yet ...he could not stop himself. The Princeling was him and he was the Princeling, and in the wake of his devastation he only clung tighter to the persona he had created to protect himself. It had ceased to be a shield. He would endure, because he had too. Because he was destined for greatness and there was nothing else.

Except today he sought something familiar. Fox. Ira did not know that she no longer resided in Swiftcurrent Creek and had been making his way there since he had parted, heart broken from Sitri. He paused as he neared the Creek, lifting his leg to scratch at the fading pink scar on his neck, stomach roiling against the notion for a few seconds before the itch went away and he stood once more. The pallid Princeling drew in a deep breath and let out a call for Fox needing someone that he liked to talk too — though he had considered stopping at The Sunspire to pick a fight with Jace in attempts to make himself feel better. He had bypassed, needing company that liked him and vice versa.

Something dark furred and scrappy came loping towards him at the borders, and though Ira felt extremely lost in his grief he was not so lost that he did not feel a surge of annoyance. He scowled, rolling silver eyes, not recognizing his girlfriend (or ex-girlfriend?) initially. The approaching girl began to speak and Ira's eyes snapped down, his heart giving a painful palpitation in his chest as he drew in a sharp breath. Part of him wanted to believe it ...that it was really her but another part of the Nox Princeling told him not to hope, that Bones had been stolen from him and that he wouldn't ever see her again. Ira made a choked noise when she said his name, fierce silver eyes furiously studying her, committing her face to his memory as adrenaline pulsed through his body though, irrationally, he had no idea why. He wasn't scared. Maybe it wasn't adrenaline at all. His heart seemed to swell with relief, elation and something else that he instinctively shied from as he allowed himself to recognize that it was really, truly Bones. Even as his heart bled for the death of his mother. It was the most conflicting mesh of emotions but he didn't care. “Bones. Bones...Bones,” The Princeling murmured her name over and over, wanting to stride forward and close the aching distance between them.

His feeling hadn't gone anywhere for the Tortuga girl and Jinx had known it. He had lied to himself in the hopes of returning to his mother's good graces but he hadn't been able to lie to her. Ira didn't know if Bones still felt the same way, but at the current moment all he cared about was her and that she was there and that she was alive.

“I came for you. I went to Tortuga to rescue you...I'm sorry I failed.” It had been stupid of him to go alone but Ira had been confident and it had nearly cost him his life. Hated the scar he wore. It was an ugly mar upon his once flawless make up. It was a neon sign of his failure to save one of the few wolves that he cared about in the world. “Bones, it's really you.” He did not yet look past her face, did not see any of her injuries, afraid that if he tore his eyes away she would melt into the shadows and he would be alone. Ira didn't want her to be an illusion. “I just needed someone and I thought Fox...I,” His thoughts were a jumble. Ira was torn between his elation at seeing Bones again and the devastation of losing his mother. “...Jinx is dead, Bones.” Ira whispered quietly, unable to say it in any more of a volume, closing his eyes against her touch.

Ira drew in deep breaths, drinking in her scent hungrily, knowing that he didn't want this moment to end. If he knew how to freeze them in that moment he would have; and that knowledge frightened him. Eventually his curse had caught up to Jinx, too. The pallid Princeling trembled slightly, not wanting to acknowledge the severity in which he cared for Bones but not wanting to lose her by denying it, either. He was conflicted, though feeling such was nothing inherently new for him. He accepted her apology silently. He was sorry too. He regretted that they had fought, and that he hadn't been there for her in her final moments. Yet, regret wouldn't bring Jinx back. Bones changed the subject and Ira found that he didn't mind. He had dwelt too much on his mother's death for too long and all it had done was confuse and drive the knife a little bit deeper into his chest. He had sought Fox to distract himself, but he had found something much better. Perhaps Jinx's Bear Gods had not given up on him, after all. Not that Ira was religious, but somehow they had found their way to this point. There Bones was right in front of him.

Ira shivered slightly when he felt her nose touch the marred flesh of his neck.

“Of course I came for you,” The Princeling sniffed in an arrogant manner that was an echo of his old self. His heart wasn't quite into it as of late but he did not want to wallow in his devastation forever. Life went on and he did not want to be left behind. Defiance was apart of his charm, after all. “You're my girl, Bones. Besides I'm pretty sure we talked about mateship and children...I mean I can't share my superior genes with just anyone.” He teased her lightly though his words were sincere. They were young and had just been kids when they had spoken of that stuff but Ira hadn't forgotten. He didn't want anyone else. Even if Bones no longer liked him ...it didn't matter to Ira. He was annoyingly determined like that. “You're the only one I want.” He admitted in a manner that was almost demure and definitely un-Ira-like. Ira snorted softly when she said that he didn't fail her, but despite her assurance it had still felt like a failure to the Princeling. A success would have been breaking her free and taking her far away from that cesspit she had been born into.

“Apparently you're not my damsel in distress, hm?” Ira smirked at her, brazenly making to brush his muzzle against hers. That was okay because he wasn't a hero. “Did they hurt you? Are you ok? Are you safe now?” He asked her; for her safety was one of the most important things to him.

Ira's pupils blew wide within their pools of sharp silver until there was nothing of a thin halo of iris left when Bones' words began to stutter and his blood froze within his veins. Ice pooled in his stomach as he considered that she was rejecting him. He stopped breathing, not even realizing that he had sucked it in, that his lungs refused to expel it until they had begun to ache for oxygen and he released it sharply. A small sliver of hope remained when she specified that the wolves of Tortuga had done things to her, that she didn't think she could be intimate nor bear pups with anyone. A low growl erupted from within the strong column of the pallid Princeling's throat meant for those who had hurt her. If it was not for the value upon his own life he would have torn himself away and stalked all the way to Tortuga and took down any of them that he could before they tore him down. However, he collected himself and nudged her cheek wanting her to meet his eyes. “Hey,” He called her attention in a softened tone. “You have nothing to apologize for,” It wasn't her fault and he wasn't really torn up about the no children thing. He was only nearing his first birthday, and even if he wasn't he was pretty sure he would have made the worst father in the world.

“If you think that changes how I feel about you Bones, you're dead wrong. I don't care about those things.” Besides it wasn't like that couldn't have been worked around. Jinx had adopted him. “I understand if ...if you don't want to be with me. Or if it's too soon after everything. I just don't want to lose you again.” He had already lost her once, and did not want to really lose anyone else, for that matter, though Bones was really the only thing he had left.

So it was a rejection. Ira looked over her head, unseeingly into the distance. His ears slicked back to his skull as he took her words in. He wasn't exactly disheartened — it wasn't in Ira's nature to just give up but he did not want to disrespect her or push her too hard. Maybe she needed a little time. Or maybe she could never love him. It was better that way, he knew. Safer for her. His heart still hurt, though, the backlash of her rejection stinging him. Used to hiding things like that, however, he veiled it so that she didn't feel bad for it. He didn't blame her. Ira drew in a heavy breath and let it out in a long sigh. “If you think I give up that easily then you're in for a rude awakening,” The indignant Princeling told her in a teasing tone before it fell and he returned to a much more serious demeanor. “But I won't push, I promise. I would much rather have you as a friend then nothing at all,” But in truth he wanted to be more than friend with her. He wanted to love her and protect her. “Don't let them take your ability to love away, Bones. Don't give them the satisfaction of that,” His gaze lowered when she called herself damaged goods and said that he deserved more. A soft half snort left the pallid Princeling.

“You're not damaged goods, don't say that about yourself. You're perfect. And I don't. I don't even deserve you. I'm cursed, remember?” Over and over it kept hitting him, taking everything he dared to allow himself to cherish away from him. Everything that had happened was only served to be proof of it.

“I've been monster for such a long time that it is me and I am it,” He could not remember a time when he hadn't been an insolent, spoiled, cruel little shit. It had stopped being a life line and became his life a long time ago. “I'm so glad you're back,” He breathed, eager to change the subject to something a little bit more cheerful. It wasn't where he felt that she belonged (because he was confident she belonged with him) but at least she was safe and alive. “The Creek wolves better take really good care of you.” He didn't finish it with an 'or else' because it was implied. It was an implied thread and promise all in one. He wasn't sure where he was going to go, or what he was going to do with himself; and he dreaded the idea of leaving Bones again even if they were only friends now. But Ira had no path, no plan aside from maybe trying to give leading a pack a run as Jinx had always intended for him, had groomed him to do before he had gone and messed it all up. It was an idea but Ira wasn't even sure it was a good one and anyway, he had quite a few bit of things to work through. Besides, he doubted any pack would want him because he did not do well with authority.

“That's right,” Ira murmured in agreement when she corrected him. In truth it didn't really matter to him what he was. It wasn't as if he could change it. For too long had he assumed that persona that he didn't know how to be anything else...wasn't even sure he wanted to be anything else. At Bones' question the pallid Princeling hesitated, unsure if he should tell her that Jinx herself had banished him months ago or not. He wanted to be honest with her but not honest enough that she felt bad. He regretted that Jinx and him had fought but he did not regret trying to save Bones. He would do it again in a heartbeat. “It's not her pack anymore and they have nothing for me,” He told her simply with a casual shrug of his shoulders. Jinx had founded it, yes, but there was nothing left of her there anymore. He wanted nothing to do with them anyway, for they had let her die. In the end, as far as Ira was concerned it was they would have betrayed her. “Do you want me to stay with you? I have no commitments, nothing keeping me away.” He was a free agent — a Princeling with no throne. “The future is open.” For the both of them, he believed. “I'd like that...and maybe I can meet your father. I mean...only if you want.” He realized how it might have sounded and, furthermore, how it might have looked to anyone outside of them and he didn't want to put her in any sort of uncomfortable position.

Ira didn't want to be anywhere where Bones wasn't but for the sake of respecting her wishes he kept that to himself, teeth grazing his tongue as he pretended to consider it. “I will stay with you ...as long as Bazi doesn't mind,” The insolent Princeling paused then and gave the Tortuga girl a wicked, cheeky grin. “I can't promise I'd behave, though.” Ira had a real problem with authority. He'd only listened to Jinx because he loved and respected her. He could not say for sure that he would be able to keep himself from being insolent. He had bossed around the higher ranked, older wolves of Sivertip Mountain without so much as a thought for consequence. That had not changed — would probably never change. “Feels like a strange place without them, right?” He did not recognize the work of Jinx in the Spine pack anymore. It occurred to Ira that maybe he could convince Sitri to follow him. He didn't necessarily like the ugly brute but he had been loyal to Jinx and Ira had to admit that he respected that out of Sitri. There was always the chance that no one would even want to put up with Ira's behavior anyway. After all, he wasn't sure if he would even get into Swiftcurrent Creek because he wouldn't lie about it. He was who he was and he wasn't going to change it for anyone.

Bones seemed to like the idea of Ira meeting the elusive Atticus. Indeed, Ira was looking forward to meeting the only parent that Bones had that didn't treat her like crap. Or, at least he hoped Atticus would never mistreat Bones. “It's a plan then,” Ira concurred, reveling in the thought of spending more time with her.

Ira shot his pirate queen Bones a cheeky little grin when she told him to behave long enough so that he could stay with her, mirroring the cheeky smile she had gave to him. It had been some time since Ira had last used his ability to charm — too long. He wasn't even sure he could play that role anymore but he would put on his best Princeling behavior because of Bones; because he wanted to be with her in whichever way she would allow him to be. Because Bones had asked him too. “I'll try,” The pallid demon promised her before she sent up her call for Bazi. He waited near Bones, careful not to touch her, letting his eyes take in the full extent of the damage. She was malnourished and though Ira could only see her physical scars he knew there were hidden ones. He hated her mother and her cohorts — hated everything they stood for. For hurting Bones so much that she didn't even want to be with him even though he didn't care that she did not want intimacy, that she couldn't ever bear children. There was more to a relationship than those things Ira knew and it wasn't as if it was sexual attraction that held him captive with Bones. Not that she wasn't beautiful because she was, to him, but he wasn't sexually mature yet and that type of attraction wasn't even possible for him yet.

Ira could not entirely snuff out the hope that maybe if he stayed with her, if he held fast to his learned patience — the same patience he needed to be an assassin, that he could show her that he wasn't going to leave her, that he wouldn't let anyone hurt her and maybe, just maybe Ira hoped, she would heal and come around. “I would always come for you,” Even if he had to die a thousand deaths. “We match, you and I,” He teased her lightly, moving his muzzle close to offer her a gentle lick to her cheek. He hated his scar but mostly it was a cosmetic hatred — he couldn't help his narcissism but he was also grateful to it, too, now. Maybe it would help Bones...knowing that she wasn't alone. Ira's fierce silver eyes went to Bazi when the wintery woman approached, watching as she offered Bones a nudge that though Ira knew that Bazi meant her no harm, made him itch to tell her not to touch Bones. Ira resisted, reminding himself to behave for Bones' sake. So that he could, hopefully, be with her. Ira offered Bazi a quiet nod, biting back the quip that he didn't remember her, his eyes moving to Bones before they rested back upon Bazi's paws.

It grated furiously on Ira's nerves to have to submit, to swallow the biting comments he desired to let loose, wry and crass as they were in his mind. It was hard to force himself to obey when he desired only to be himself. To calm the annoyance that rose inside him when Bazi assumed that he had missed flat ground. “No,” The pallid Princeling drew out the word. “I missed Bones. And I would like to be with her.” Ira spoke truthfully and as respectfully as he could manage with was surprisingly, pretty respectful, not really wanting to tell her that Jinx was dead and that Bones was all he had left in the world. That was way too personal of a thing for Ira to admit. He was good at disguising his true feelings. He'd had many months of practice, after all.

Ira's eyes of silver with starbursts of crystalline blue around the pupils flitted from Bazi to Bones, unafraid to look the Tortuga girl in the face. In truth, he wasn't afraid to look Bazi in the face, either, but out of the desire to be with Bones he kept a tight reign on his own leash. No matter how annoying it was. The pallid Princeling grimaced, slight chagrin flitting across his face only because he let it when Bones told Bazi that Jinx was deceased. He did not think that Bones' words were exactly true. As far as Ira was concerned he didn't need anyone but Bones; but Swiftcurrent Creek and Bones seemed to be a package deal and he could not lose Swiftcurrent Creek without forsaking Bones. “I'll do my best.” Ira told Bazi with a twitch of his lips, likewise, wondering what it was that drew Bones back to this Creek. He didn't know enough about Bazi, barely remembered her at all, and it would seem that she didn't give two shits about Jinx's death. She didn't even offer him the courtesy condolences. The Princeling hardly wanted to hear false words of sympathy, of course, but even so. The pallid boy didn't offer her a thank you — mostly because those were words that Ira hardly ever uttered.

He looked to Bones then, expectantly, wondering if it was safe for them to go ahead and finish catching up with one another, or if Bazi had anything more she wanted to say to him.

When Bones turned to him and asked if he had an interest in relearning the lands, Ira offered her a silent nod, deciding that it was better if he kept his mouth tightly shut and didn't speak, even though he would have only spoken in response to Bones. But there was always a chance something would come spilling out that might cost him a place in the Creek and Ira was willing to do what it took to make sure he could stay with Bones, even if it meant playing the falsity of being mute. He followed behind Bones, only to pause when Bazi called out for them to wait. Silver eyes peered at his new alpha female, brow furrowing at her question. A part of Ira did not want to answer. But remaining silent might have revealed him for the rude little shit he truly was; and he was trying to be on his best behavior on Bones' behalf.

It was an easy assumption to make, for there was no secret that there was no love lost between Ira and Lecter. “The Shaman is dead,” Ira responded mechanically. Lecter's death didn't hurt him but to say that it didn't entirely bother him would be a lie. The pallid Princeling wasn't even sure he had liked Lecter but Jinx had loved him and he had loved Jinx and that had been important to Ira. He couldn't hate Lecter and that made a huge amount of difference to the Nox boy.