Wolf RPG

He had waited near the soldiers dens until the imperator had come for him, stewing in his shame and self-loathing. He wished he had time to explain things to @Aquene, but he was to leave directly after seeing her. By the time @Germanicus came to collect him, he was far beyond words. He still had none. 

When they walked into the tablinum, Kallik's irritation spiked as Glaukos' scent mixed with the scent of the healer and her plants—a scent that usually calmed him. He didn't like that he had been here, but he knew the imperator had supervised, and he knew the other soldier's wounds needed to be treated. He was angry with him, but he didn't want him to die. Had he been a more controlled man, less driven by emotion, he might have thought things through better before attacking his fellow auxillary. 

He would give the healer an apologetic look as he sat down. There were many things he wanted to tell her. He wanted to embrace her and tell her he would be back soon. But he would not say or do anything like that while Germanicus watched. Instead, he just watched her work and listened quietly to whatever the imperator told her.

Seeing the damage on Glaukos had been startling… a part of her was worried about what the man had done to Kallik as well. They could both be hotheaded apparently. Aquene was already preparing another salve knowing she might need it when Germanicus returned with her boyfriend, offering him a saddened and worried look in return. She would always worry about him, and there was much she wanted to say as well, but it did not feel like the time with the Imperator watching their movements.
 
The wound on her neck was what first caught her attention, her focus glued to it for a moment. She offered him scrub pine for the pain, not explaining what it was for because she knew that he already knew. It was not his first time taking it. Instead she was hustling to once more clean the wound, running a water soaked leaf over to gently clean away the blood, a tender touch that she would have given all her patients, but perhaps more so him.
 
“This wound is worse than I thought it would be… the wounds on both of you were worse than I thought they would be.” She mused quietly, a hint of pain in her own voice as she moved and obtained cobwebs, placing them along his neck to ensure that the wound had fully closed before she treated for infection.

He took the needles without question, chewing and swallowing the plant. He had expected the bitter taste this time and was not surprised by it. 

Her touch was gentle as she cleaned his wound. He wanted to brush his nose along her cheek in thanks but not with the imperator watching. Kallik could feel his shrewd gaze searing into the side of him as Aquene worked.

She mentioned she hadn't expected the wounds to be so bad. You are surprised? he asked, surprised himself that she didn't seem to know what they were capable of. They were trained soldiers; what else had she expected? He wondered if this changed her view of him. The worry leaked into his gaze as he watched her.

Kallik was an easier patient, though perhaps that was because of the level of trust that existed between them. She raised a brow at the surprise in his voice. “These are injuries I’d expect from a warfront, not between packmates.” She explained again though judgement lacked in her tone. It was difficult, speaking in riddles solely to avoid adding another burden atop of the Imperator in that moment. She felt partially responsible for his lashing out and she had made that no secret to the leading duo. If she had simply never told him, then perhaps this would not have happened. Or perhaps if she had asked him specifically to stay his hand… either way, it was too late to both.
 
She finished cleaning the room, moving over to start on the poultice, laying yarrow, aloe, and lavender, grinding them together on a leaf with water until it was thick, bringing it over. “This is going to sting.” She warned softly, craving to be able to offer him some form of comfort or peace, and also to ask him what the hell had happened. She kept the softness, the flecks of adoration in her eyes that she could not possibly hide. Her views of him had not changed, at least not for the worst. She’d never expected someone to fight for her so vigorously, especially against a member of their own pack. She’d never been valued like that before. She layered the paste she had made across the wound, slowly to try and avoid too much stinging at once. “It’s lavender, yarrow, and aloe. It will help prevent infection. Soaking into the cobwebs I’ll play on top that will act like a more sticky poultice than the one I used for your soreness. The cobwebs will come off naturally, leave them there until they do.” Eventually as the wound started to close, the cobwebs would start to peel.

There was no judgement in her tone but the knot of shame writhed in his chest all the same. He hadn't really held back during the fight, though he wouldn't have gone as far as to kill the other soldier. Still, it had been impulsive and stupid. He assumed that was what she thought as well. His gaze dropped, but his face was blank otherwise as he started building up his wall of ice. Shame always hurt the most, and he was desperately trying to dull the sick feeling in his chest.

He was lost in the self-loathing again, staring blankly at the floor until her voice seemed to snap him out of it. She said whatever she was doing would sting. If it did, he didn't react; it was nothing compared to the beating he was giving himself on the inside. What he wouldn't give to pull Aquene close and nuzzle his face into her fur. It felt like the only thing that would loosen the knot in his chest. 

She explained the plants and what they were for, gave him instruction on the cobwebs, but he was honestly having trouble processing it all. He would try to retain what he could just so he wouldn't fail at something else if he or Glaukos were injured while they were gone.

I'm sorry, Aquene, he murmured, his tone full of everything he was feeling but couldn't say. Can you repeat what you said? I want to be sure I remember it.

She wished that she felt she could speak freely so she could assure him everything would be fine when his gaze dropped. It hurt her heart to think about. He was apologizing, and then the question came and she responded in kind. “No need to apologize; it is fine.” She stated hoping that he understood the hidden meaning in her words. “The salve is going to sting but it will help keep infection out. It will absorb into the cobwebs. Leave them on until they start to peel naturally.” She stated again for his record. She finished applying the salve.
 
She went to place the cobwebs, carefully making sure the wound was covered. It had been most concerning and most alarming. She started to look him over for other injuries as well, hints of worry that had been present with Glaukos from a clinical perspective, but there was something more in her worry for Kallik. Still, she forced herself to keep calm, and to keep her decorum.

The presumably hidden feelings in her words made the auxillary able to take a deeper breath. The knot loosened a little. Whatever she thought about the situation didn't seem to affect how the healer felt about him. Again, he wished for some privacy so that he could be more open about what he was thinking and feeling, but it would be a level of vulnerability he wasn't comfortable showing the imperator. Kallik trusted him of course, but that didn't mean he felt comfortable being soft in front of his commander.

She explained again, and this time the fog in his brain had cleared some, so he was able to truly commit it to memory. 

Then she was looking him over, and he could tell she was worried. He might have brushed his nose along her cheek again if they were alone. But they weren't. I am okay, he promised her, his tone more gentle than what was normal for him, despite how hard he was trying to keep his feelings for the healer a secret from Germanicus. He would know soon, but now was not the time. I just have the one wound. The rest are just bruises. His teeth still ached from the hard upper cut the other soldier had dealt him.

She knew little about how they were being handled by the Imperator other than that they were going to be away for a duration… it meant they would be responsible for their own wounds and their own treatment plan. It was no ideal in her mind, but a part of her understood that it was the life of a soldier. “While you are away, you need to keep the wound clean until it heals. It’s in an awkward place, so it is something you might need assistance with.” It was difficult to reach one’s own neck, so the boys would need to get along for the sake of survival in that regard.
 
“If you notice pain in the wound, it could be infection festering. You will want to find yarrow and grind it onto something that you can apply on top of the wound. Yarrow looks like this.” She held up the brittle-like stem to show him. “It’s got a distinctive stem which is why I mention it. It will be easier to identify than other plants for wolves who are not trained. If it begins to bleed or opens up again, cobwebs.” She gave him the same crash course she had given Glaukos earlier.

Aquene was far better at keeping up appearances than the auxillary. She maintained the illusion that their relationship didn't go beyond packamtes or doctor and patient. Meanwhile, he was on the verge of saying fuck it, and pulling her against him regardless of the imperator's watchful gaze. But that would be impulsive, something he was trying not to be anymore. He would control himself because he didn't want to ruin what he had with Aquene. 

She explained he would need to keep the wound clean; he thought that was easy enough until she mentioned he would need help. The only one that would be with him was Glaukos, which made things more difficult. Maybe he would just do the best he could on his own. 

His healer told him what to do if the wound became infected. She mentioned something called yarrow and what it looked like. He would need to grind it into dust. He thought it seemed manageable. Kallik nodded after each thing the said, his gaze searching for hers so that they could have a private conversation with their eyes—he would miss her and he would be careful. The auxillary would return. 

Thank you, Aquene, he said quietly. He wished for even a few moments alone with her, especially now that he knew she was almost done.

Control had been a part of her life from a very young age, and it was in moments like this that she felt blessed for having developed such a skill. Otherwise she might have acted impulsively in turn. He paid attention and she finished up her work. Kallik’s gaze met hers and it felt like an eternity in that moment. She didn’t want it to end. He would return and she would be here waiting patiently for when he could. He fell under the Imperator’s domain and he had acted out in a way that was not approved, therefore she knew the punishment was necessary… it didn’t mean that it didn’t suck.
 
It did suck, a lot.
 
“Come back safe.” It was the only time the emotion broke through the character she was playing, a softness in her eyes and a soft pleading in her voice. She knew in that moment it might require an explanation, but truthfully the Matrona already knew of their closeness and that meant the Imperator would likely soon know as well, even if she hadn’t used the direct terms. Ruenna was a smart woman, and could put two and two together with the tale Aquene had told her and the mixing of their scents providing the additional details… perhaps she would speak to her once more in more certain terms. Perhaps not; she could wait for his return… either way, she would worry about him.

I will, he promised, and it was a promise. He had every intention of returning. 

He stood then, and nodded to the healer, his gaze soft until he turned to the imperator. He would look at him with his normal coldness, building up his icy walls with every step he took away from Aquene.

He would think of her at night while alone in the wild of the uncleared area. He knew Glaukos would not be much company, not that he would want any from the other soldier anyway. Things were still too heated between them. 

He would walk from the tablinum without looking back.

He made a promise to her, and it brought her some ease of mind though he knew as well as she did that he could not necessarily make that promise.

She watched as he disappeared, watching those stony walls go back up around him and she watched until his form disappeared, seeing Germanicus leave as well. She figured he was heading to his wife. They had a busy night ahead of them as well, she knew. She sighed softly, not hesitating once they were gone and things were cleaned up to collapse on the pelt in the corner of the tablinum.

It had been a long day, and she was ready for some well-deserved rest so she might restock the following day.