Wolf RPG

He lay in the cold sunshine, staring out at a charred bit of land. His ears were perked and though he felt relaxed in the warmth provided by the light, he was still alert. If they called - anyone - he would be there. This was new to him and he would make his presence known in the pack until everyone was aware of his existence. He was not one to stand out but neither would he be ignored.

He thought of Prophet. Perhaps, he would stand out more here than he had before. 

There were also the other two he had met...the muted male who'd hung close to Avicus and the brown who seemed to be the pack healer. Met was, maybe, too strong of a word for what had happened. He didn't know their names, though he was sure he could find them in a crowd. There were more here, he could smell them. He'd been essentially alone since he'd disappeared with his Berserkr inside of the territory, aside from the summoning and the fox. 

The fox...he ignored that scenario, his mind turning instead to the burned wood in front of him. He wondered when that had happened and why, letting his mind drift aimlessly as he stored his energy for when he was given a purpose.

Ashlar didn't dwell on the things he had already known. Instead he sought out the man who was new, the one who Avicus had tested. The earthen bard was definitely nervous, but his reasons were both social and practical. He wanted them to know who to come to when they needed healing and he wanted them to trust him when they did so. It was important.

He remembered, too, being on the receiving end of Ursus' tests. He wondered how the man felt afterward.

He was in the burned section, near the space Avicus had named. His mind turned briefly to the song he'd crafted, but he did not sing it. Instead he approached cautiously, smiling apologetically and prepared to leave if he was unwanted. Hi. I'm Ashlar.

His eyes, dilated as his mind wandered, narrowed as they shifted to stare at...well, at the chocolate male from before. It was not in Ratio's nature to be jumpy, but he felt a thrill of anxious energy as he looked up at the smaller male. It was followed immediately by irritation. His hackles prickled ever slightly and he fought himself to keep them flat and smooth. Crimson red stared long enough to see glittering gold before they shifted and he looked away. 

The smaller wolf was nervous, Ratio could tell. Dense as he may have been at times, he could read body language. He wanted to rise but he remained where he was on the ground, feeling his paws prick as he felt somehow exposed. On the floor and once again uncomfortable... he felt his mood shift and he fought hard to remain neutral. This wolf didn't deserve his anger. He'd done nothing wrong.  

His voice was carefully controlled when he answered. "Ratio." he said simply, ears slowly folding. "Did you need me for something?"

Ashlar. His name was Ashlar. Well, at least he knew that now.

He was right to be apologetic. The man did not seem to want company right now. Prophet and Augur had been welcome surprises but Ratio's gaze felt heavy, much like Tulimaq's still did. He lowered his eyes out of habit and stopped.

N...no, sorry. It wasn't necessary. I just... j-just saw you were new. And... yeah. This was embarassing. Everything that he was going to say had completely left his head. He was not used to having a role to fill, to having words he actually needed to say when he met strangers. Ashlar warmed uncomfortably with the awareness that now he'd completely wasted the man's time.

I can come back. He finished finally, quieter still, tail hanging with shame. He should have prepared.

He heard the stammer and it did something to him. He listened in silence as the wolf fumbled with his words and there was a terrible twist in his gut. His ears unflattened from his skull and he turned to look at Ashlar, his eyes filled with a sharp concern. His anger had dissipated like morning fog. He felt an odd swell of...something. He couldn't name it, or didn't want to. It sat heavy in his guts but he also felt it rush through his veins. He was no longer annoyed, no longer fighting his temper - it had been replaced with a quiet distress. 

He did not want to hear the stuttering of his words. He didn't want to be the cause of it - for some reason, that was the worst. Ashlar had looked at him, heard him, and thought there was something wrong with himself? The brown wolf had done nothing wrong. Ratio was an ass. And an idiot. It was times like these when he felt he had never really grown at all - like he was always going to be the same angry, ignorant bastard.

"You're okay." he said, and he meant it.

There was silence and then - "I'm...sorry." he didn't say it often, mostly because he usually didn't feel it. He shifted uncomfortably and his gaze moved away from Ashlar again, this time in self-consciousness. "You're...what, the healer? You knew the fox was..." he trailed off. He didn't like the way the creature had been killed. Ratio didn't think himself a bleeding heart - a poor reflection of reality, really - but he didn't like the screaming. Things had to die and that was fine but there were better ways to do it.

Ashlar didn't straighten when the other man relented, though it did confirm what he'd thought the day before. He was kind, even when the healer had caught him at a bad time. It did not need to be okay but Ratio said it was regardless. He still might have left to spare the intrusion, but the question held him there.

Yes. I'm j.... uh, sort of.... learning. He winced internally as he fumbled it. When he was nervous his tongue never seemed to cooperate. But he had made it clear that he could leave and Ratio had not asked him to - instead he had invited conversation. Maybe it was okay to continue?

Are you a warrior? Everyone so far had been, and with Avicus' test it seemed he would be. But how he saw himself, and how Avicus saw him... did it differ, as it had for Ashlar at first? He wanted to know this.

Ashlar didn't relax but he didn't leave and that was good enough for Ratio.

"Learning." he repeated with a small nod. "Everyone is, all the time...the good ones, at least." he commented, a rare bit of poeticism. Ratio felt the need to sharpen his own skills. It tugged at him that he was not yet good enough and might never be good enough. He felt the desire to practice and work and be of use. He had to be of use - why else was he there?

He had to justify his existence. Or not exist at all. 

"I am." he said, looking back at the nervous wolf. "I was before I came here, for my old pack. A long time ago. And so I am again." he paused and let some quiet stretch between them. He did not know why he felt the urge to continue, to say more than that - to give his opinion. But, he did. "I like Prophet."

It was awkward and he didn't know what else to say. So, instead, he just went quiet.

Here was a common thing. Ashlar smiled, both relieved and happy to speak well of a packmate who he considered a friend. I do too. The quiet wasn't as heavy for Ashlar, and the pause gave him a bit to settle his nerves further. It was easier now that he was not speaking of himself and what he didn't know. He told me about war. I want to sing about it, but I don't know what it is.

Everyone is, all the time...the good ones, at least. He liked that sentiment, and it made it easier for him to admit the things he lacked. The things he'd thought he did not mind lacking until the lack meant something more. It sounds terrible. Could he capture terrible in a song? He'd never tried.

The younger wolf spoke of war. Prophet had seen war? Ratio did not know that. It was not an absolute surprise - he had spoken relatively little to Prophet, despite his attachment. 

"I don't know war." he admitted. A guard he was but he was called upon only to defend the territory from passersby and to accompany the upper classes. He was taught and they trained but they didn't use it for battle like the type Ashlar spoke of. He had learned of it, in case it ever arose. Looking back now, it seemed an extremely unlikely event for his old pack and he doubted that anyone he'd grown up with had ever actually seen it. 

"I know that it is brutal and cruel. I was told of that. I was told to prepare for death, of course, and to fight anyway. These were things I knew but didn't apply to my life." he thought for a moment. Ashlar had mentioned singing. "You sing?" he asked.

Told to prepare for death. The more Ashlar heard, the more he wondered how any wolf could be driven to it. He had felt Avicus' mourning rage in the ravaged forest and it had stilled him, taught him something of it. But still he wondered if even something as strong as that could ever lead him to the same choice. He could not bring himself to believe that blood ever righted blood.

I sing. He confirmed, looking down once more. His ears tilted self-consciously. I heal, mostly. But I sang first. It just isn't as much, especially here. He loved to sing and would never belittle it, but Ashlar was realistic. When the fighting began he could put it to song after; during there would be little time for it. A bard had little place on a battleground like the ones Prophet had spoken of.

Where are you from?

A singer. Ratio did not know any of those, not personally. 

He did not know the extent to which Ashlar was avoidant of violence. If he had, he might have thought the boy naive. They shared compassion, though Ratio was not open about it. An aversion to aggression he could never understand. As it was, Ashlar did not say so. Perhaps one day he would be surprised by the chocolate male - indeed, it was almost a given. 

What is wrong with here? He thought quietly. His mind wandered to the pushy male beside Avicus - and Avicus herself - and thought he might have an idea of the answer. 

"I come from far away. Nowhere worth really mentioning." he shrugged. "I left my pack without notice and never came back. I found...uh..." he drifted off, his mind settling briefly on a ruddy coat and skittering away as if burned by the image. "I traveled for a while. Met with some trouble. The coastal forest is where I started and the mountains are where I found home. Now I'm here."

Surely Ashlar couldn't be all that interested in him? His story was boring, except - perhaps - for the parts he didn't tell. 

"Not exciting. How about you? Do you come from here?"

Ashlar couldn't help but argue, though he reddened immediately after. Every place is worth knowing. He hoped that wasn't insulting. He liked hearing about distant places, even if they were boring. His parents' pack was quiet and small and, even with that, one of his favorite places to sing about.

It sounds... uh, interesting. Like you've done and seen a lot. He added a little haltingly, shy but wanting to encourage. He wanted to hear more if Ratio was willing to share.

I'm from a forest far away. Kinda far. Mama's family lives there, some of them, and papa is a healer. He helped me to learn when we were there, after we left the Bear. Ashlar watched Ratio, suddenly curious if he'd heard of the other pack. How many knew of the bear king? There isn't any war there. I never knew what it was, before I met Avicus. She was opposite of anything he had known to this point, but they were still friends. Proof that it was possible to accept things you did not necessarily understand.

Ratio rolled his shoulders in a shrug, he didn't admonish the chocolate male for his embarrassment but gave no reason for him to feel it. He was feeling more comfortable with Ashlar and his eyes roamed him quietly for a moment, taking him in though he wasn't one to leer and he tried to be subtle. He was...nice. Ratio liked the way he looked. He suspected that was part of his problem beforehand but he pushed that aside, responding to his comment about Ratio's experience. 

"I've done a little bit but that's over now. I like this new place." He did like the Rise, a great deal. He already felt very attached to it.

He listened with perked ears as Ashlar told him of his own background. He was opening his mouth, perhaps to ask why he'd left, when his jaws clicked shut and he cocked his head like a puppy. He looked comical but Ratio neither realized nor cared. "Bear?"

Avicus. He had a question about Ashlar following her, as well, but first, he was curious about the..."bear".

He didn't understand. The Bear King's pack. Ursus. Ashlar clarified, looking down without really thinking about it. He had never lived up to his place there and thinking about it, about them, was still conflicting. He'd have liked to have helped them more but nothing he had tried had moved them.

This place is much better. He wouldn't say it to Avicus, unwilling to insult her family in front of her. But she probably already knew this.

Avicus wants me to patrol. D'you.... wanna come? He didn't want to cut their conversation short, and wanted the company, but Ratio had looked busy when he arrived. He didn't want to seem like he was trying to push his company where it wasn't wanted.

ooc; Sounds good!

Ursus. Ratio didn't know them, maybe he should? Perhaps he should learn about all of the surrounding packs. There hadn't been much diplomacy in his old pack but there seemed to be a denser population in his new home. 

An invitation to patrol. Ratio paused, mulling over accompanying the chocolate wolf around the border. He felt much less uncomfortable and, in truth, he should probably be patrolling as well. In the end, he didn't deliberate very long before rising to his feet. "Yes. I do." He gestured with his muzzle for Ashlar to lead and followed quietly behind him.