initially, heda had tried to keep up her spirits and those of the girls by telling them stories about what little she remembered about the bypass, lightly embellishing here and there.
when that hadn't seemed to lift the melancholy, she found a den large enough for them all in dreamleaf, encouraging the young ones to decorate, explore, and gather whatever they wanted for the den.
they survived on small game and, twice, an elderly deer who had found a peaceful death in silencepine.
heda had taken this all in stride; she had tried so hard to manage each day at a time, each hour of healing at a time, tearing more and more when she thought of her boys on the island.
we should go back, then, being her first thought as snow whirled through noctisardor, was not surprising. in dismay she stared at the whorl of white which marked the end of her fragile bliss and the very stark reality that she and they might starve here without others.
Mae was more concerned for the small group which had briefly stayed with Hearthwood than she let on. She lingered in the valley, and after a day or two of indecision, decided that she would visit. She brought a weasel by way of gift.
It wasn't much of a claim, was it? Mae stepped through it without calling out, following scents until she found the pale woman who led them. Hey,
She greeted from a distance, somewhat muffled by what she carried. She put it down. I'm uh, from Hearthwood. Thought I'd check in.
the girl was the age of her own, at least it appeared to the eyes of heda. still, she was frustrated to be found. not at the girl, but rather at how after weeks of being in the bypass, their borders were not a boundary at all.
the musk of the weasel wafted upward. "thank you for visiting us. dinah and ava are sure to be close," heda said softly, for the sort of conversations she needed to have could not be had with a child. the golden eyes were soft in their pouches of sleeplessness.
Dinah and Ava. Mae stepped closer, offering up the weasel as if that explained everything about her presence here. The official story was that it was Hearthwood business, of course. She was sure Reverie and Boone would endorse that kind of goody two shoes bullshit. But there was only one reason she was here, and her name was Dinah.
You guys meet the neighbors yet? Kvarsheim, Riverclan, Swiftcurrent Creek...
Mae hesitated slightly over the last name. She wondered sometimes how her father was doing these days. Probably just fine. Probably perfectly happy without her. He had Eshe now. She brushed off that line of thought and studied the woman quietly.
the idea of food turned her stomach. the girl didn't leave, instead asking about other packs in the area. heda felt her heart sink to know there were so many, and felt crushed immediately by the weight of the responsibility assigned solely to her.
"not yet," she said softly, digging her claws into the ground with a flex. "we've just been trying to settle for now. i appreciate boone and reverie, and you, but i don't want to take anything more from anyone."
sweetharbor, rivenwood, what did any of it matter if she couldn't keep them safe or fed?
Her ears twitched irritably. Sure. I'll leave you alone then. If Dinah asks or anything, I'll be around for a couple days,
Mae turned to leave then, but she didn't take the weasel with her. If the woman didn't want it, maybe one of the girls could have it.
It felt bad to have made such a terrible impression on Dinah's mother, but what was a mother worth, anyway? Mae didn't have one, and she was just fine. She would hunt for a couple of days, for Dinah and Ava if nothing else, and then return to the mountains. The protective urge in her would not be quelled otherwise, and the last thing she wanted to do was return to her home only to be plagued by worry for the redheaded girl.
heda was not immune to how the air cooled between she and mae. "sorry," hushed, low. she tasted salt and for a moment she dreamt of the island, only to find it was not brine but tears which touched her mouth.
"i didn't think I'd have to do any of this alone. we just have to start over, you know."
was it even possible?
"can you t-tell me about these packs, please?"
Mae halted. She hadn't expected an apology. S'fine,
She mumbled a bit gruffly as she turned back to the woman, embarrassed now by her own poor temper. They were going through a lot, all of them. This was only proof of it.
Starting over sucks. Doing it alone sucks. That's why I'm here,
Mae blinked slowly as she said it, unused to declaring her intentions so blatantly. Easier to delve into the valley packs, the knowledge she'd been ready to offer up just moments ago; Swiftcurrent Creek is where I was born. Lotsa warriors. Real territorial. Kvarsheim and Riverclan are more goody two shoes, but they've got a lot goin' on. Kvarsheim might help you, depends on what's up these days. It's been a few weeks since I checked on 'em.
Kvarsheim's just over that way. Big ass circle of stones, can't miss it,
She gestured in the pack's direction. Riverclan is right next door. Buncha healers over there. Not as many hunters.
heda listened quietly as mae spoke, describing the other packs roundabout. swiftcurrent, a place of fighters. riverclan and kvarsheim were described in a specific way that made her wonder what had happened between they and mae.
healers and hunters.
she shifted her paws to and fro.
"if you were me, where would you choose?" heda asked, wanting to continue their conversation despite the fact that none of the packs sounded particularly safe to a scared woman and her hurting kids.