Wolf RPG

A day to drag himself down the mountain, the slash across his flank screaming at him all the way, his bruises turning mottled underneath his coat. He had put nuutuittuq in his sights, determined and stubborn and homesick, desperate to quell the aching in his chest more so than to give himself the rest that his body demanded. He tore open the wound on his side on his way down the mountain slowing his body to a sluggish pace, another day until he found the coast and when he saw the plateau of Moontide in the distance he knew how far away from Moonglow he was. Anger papered over his wounds and aches - he had done as he had been told. Why? Why had he seen nothing - worse than nothing.

But fear was quick to follow. And for the first time in his life, short as it was, all the whole of it, a fear that he could not voice even to his anaa and his steps faltered along the sand. If others dreamed of what was inside of him was he empty and hollow and broken and absent and nothing inside? A lifetime of promises flashed before him. To Ajei, that he would return to Moonglow, that he would stay. To Anaa that he would fulfill his journey and come back to her. To Kassuq and Arrluk, his brothers. But what had he to offer them if only darkness was in his chest? What pack would accept such a brother? What wolf would accept such a lover? If he came to them with nothing in his heart, with emptiness? Would his anaa cast him out? From Moonglow first and then his family? Questions pounded in his head one after another, bubbing to the surface in a boil yet refusing to dissipate and return to the air. The water roared along the coast.

He stumbled, wounds screaming, paws refusing to move along to his commands. Pain. A simple word so hard to grasp he felt it slip sliding around him piercing him a thousand times yet he could not grasp it, could not fight it. He writhed, he might have screamed but he could not hear. Because if it was only that he did not go back that was one thing, if he could not go back...A snarl a growl, eh wanted to tear his skin off, wanted a new pelt to wear, wanted to flay open his wounds. But he was afraid.

Towhee didn’t understand why she felt so dismal lately. She had chosen Moontide for herself and @Phox, had volunteered to stay back while the others headed off to hunt. Yet here she was, feeling left behind and out, like an old car parked somewhere, forgotten and left to rust.

Quit being so goddamn dramatic, she thought, rolling her eyes at herself as she restlessly ranged along the plateau’s borders. It’s just seasonal depression or some shit. They’ll be back soon. And then…

And then, she hoped, Phox would share a tale akin to “Lady and the Tramp,” where he and Heph had kissed after slurping the same bit of intestine or something. Officially smitten, they would soon tie the knot and welcome a litter in the spring. Towhee would get to play aunt or, if she was particularly lucky, maybe she could be Towma again this year.

But even if her sister-in-law was cool that way, they wouldn’t need her, not really. Just like @Raiyuk hadn’t needed her help with his lodge, a memory which had set an unfortunate tone to Towhee’s stay in Moontide so far. Retirement was supposed to be fun and relaxing, not fraught with feelings of being unwanted and unwelcome.

You’re being fucking dumb, Towhee’s inner voice continued scolding. Pay fucking attention, you’ve got borders to patrol. But she was nearly finished with the circuit and the long walk around the perimeter had done nothing to placate her restiveness.

Heaving a dramatic sigh at herself, the Redhawk decided a change of scenery might help her strange mood. She loped northwest toward the seashore overlooking the neighboring bay, slowing down as she moseyed along the beach. It was too windy for her tastes, so she let the frigid breeze push her inland, her orange eyes casting toward the nearby coconut grove.

With the wind sweeping from the sea, she didn’t smell anything amiss. And Towhee certainly didn’t hear the brief scream that tore through the wintry air. Still, her eyes fixed ahead and she found herself marching that way like a homing missile.

In the distance, a dark furred shadow on the horizon. His mouth filled with saltwater, he could not smell this wolf nor hear them with the wind whipping past his ears. To Massaraq it was as if some dark ghost made its way towards him and he struggled, staggered to his paws, saltwater sloshing across his sides, sending his wound stinging and making his vision blurry. A feeble growl, he stumbled forward in unsure steps, but in his mind a run towards the apparent threat.

But he had not stopped to give his body food since the elk, had not stopped to give it water in many hours perhaps half a day or more. He shuffled forward near tripping over his own paws, ready to fight, teeth bared. Had he looked, had she scented the air, had he stopped to think, he might have recognized the figure. Instead he hastily lurched forward, finally tripping and succumbing, down once again, the air knocked out of him. A pained groan as he breathed in, forcing his battered ribs to obey so he could breathe once again. Why was everything so hard?

Looking at the word sideways he thought he saw a flash of red fur interspersed with the black and white. Towhee? His anaa's friend. His anaa. No. No. No. His paws twitched as if he could run, this time away but his limbs did not obey, refusing to listen to him. A whine escaped his throat. For a moment he drifted in and out of consciousness. He was dreaming. He must be. When he woke he would run and play with Ajei, then his anaa would tell him it was time for him to take a spirit walk, and then he would go and hunt and make a kill and dream of....something better than this.

She reached the trees and paused, eyes cutting from side to side. She could see a sliver of beach through an alley of bent palm trunks off to her right, though Towhee had no interest in getting closer to the water with that biting wind.

She began to turn left, thoughts of small game floating into the forefront of her mind, then suddenly turned her head. She looked back toward the glimpse of beach again just in time to catch a flash of something pale against the washed-out backdrop of sand and whitecaps. It quickly sank out of sight.

Towhee squinted, then began moving in that direction after all. She didn’t notice the slight downward grade as the land sloped toward the beach, though soon enough the dunes opened up before her. And now she could more fully see the young wolf sprawled on the sands, visibly injured and barely moving.

Hey! Towhee shouted, hastening toward him. What the hell, she muttered to herself, eyes skipping over his wounds and wondering how he’d come by them. Hey, she repeated, gaze moving to his face now as she tried to look into his eyes, can you hear me?

Her voice sounded so muffled compared to the ocean waves, even as he shouted. He twitched again, muscles spasming but he could not move. Exhaustion weighed on him, a heavy blanket, it dulled the pain, he wanted to sink into it. Can you hear me? It was Towhee. Panic again, but even fighting that was difficult, sluggish. A low whine, his words came out slowly, almost groans. "I...can't..." I can't go back, I can't face anaa and tataa and ajei and arrluk and kassuq and seal like this. But his lungs emptied of air before he could say them, before he could think them. It was so hard to see, the sun looked bright, framing this wolf's face, so bright. He squinted.

A ragged breath and his ribs rattled. So much he feared, so much to ask for. Massaraq was not so prideful he had never asked for help, but helplessness was new to him, a distant memory. But it was all he could muster. "Please." Please help me. Please don't leave me here. Please don't take me back. Please stay. Please let me rest. He pulled his breath in rolling his paws beneath him and tried to struggle to shaky paws. The soft sand cushioning yet sliding away from his weight.

Oh shit, Towhee thought as she locked eyes with him, I know you.

She couldn’t quite recall his name as her eyes flicked down to his lips, trying to catch anything he said. They barely moved, though, so his words were lost to her. Towhee made a frustrated sound and moved her eyes downward to assess his injuries.

After, she raised her head and looked around as if hoping someone else might be nearby. The grove was deserted except for the two of them and the freezing wind shaking the drooping palm leaves. Towhee thought about calling for help but wasn’t sure anybody would hear her. So many were gone to the hunt, anyway.

We need to get you out of the elements, Towhee said, thrusting her face close to his again. Massaraq, she blurted, suddenly remembering. Do you think you can stand and walk, if I help support your weight?

Her voice was close once again. need, the word was hard to comprehend at the moment. A tangle of things. He was not sure, and yet her voice was so stark, so sure. As if everything would sort itself if he only got out of the water and wind. His name. A beat in his chest, wondering if he would have it for long, or if that yawning void inside...would his name fade from other's lips like Samani's had? Or would it disappear more slowly like Galana? But her warmth was close and there was little of it left in Massaraq's bones he leaned on her.

He was lucky she could not hear him, trying to force his words crisp and clean from his mouth at first sounded like a raspy growl against his throat, a shuddering nod of his head. "Yes. I'll try." He leaned on her, almost half his weight, the sand cushioned his fall but usually hsi paws which struck the earth so evenly did not want to cooperate with him. He would go where she led, barely seeing the world around him, staring down at the ground.

She didn’t pick up his reply this time, either, but she caught the nod. Towhee braced herself as he struggled to his feet, maneuvering so he could leverage himself if he needed. When he managed to stand, she pressed in close, taking his weight. He was quite heavy, though she stood strong for both of them.

Okay, she said, shifting and looking at the surrounding grove. The trees here are spaced too far apart, they don’t cover shit. And it’s all wide open space between here and the plateau, she thought aloud, grimacing a little. Our best bet is to get you there, where we can get you some medical help. Probably. Maybe. Hopefully…

Towhee telegraphed her intent to take a few steps in that direction. It would be a long and arduous trek, though there was food and shelter at the plateau, at the very least. And she could run a message to the plains, fetch a healer and perhaps the boy’s mother, if that proved necessary.

Massaraq replied, voice still weak. "ok-ay." All of his focus was on shuffling himself along by Towhee's side, even then he leaned heavily on her, he did not know where they were going. Distantly he thought Moontide. But he did not know what to think of that. It was not Moonglow, but it was still his sea-sister's pack. Would he be welcome there? But he did not have a choice. So he went.