Wolf RPG

Her encounter with Bindi had truly worn her out, but the though of spending some alone time with Fitz brightened her mood almost immediately. She padded along the base of the mountain with a little more spring in her step, the sun setting behind her. Hopefully Fitz would be in the den by now, but if he wasn't, she could wait.

Now that they had made it to the mountain and were finally settling down, it was time for him to live up to his promise. Not that it was actually that serious, but they had been mated for a while now and they still hadn't really done anything of the romantic sort. But now that she thought about it, what if it was his first time? He would probably want to plan it out and make it special or something.

The thought stumped her and she slowed her steps a little, needing a little more time to think. Maybe tonight would be reserved for just some harmless cuddling, nothing more because she wasn't sure where he stood on the whole sex topic.

She shook her head to clear all the over thinking-ness and instead focused on just getting back to the den. If she over thought it too much, she would surely just screw everything up.

Upon reaching the cave they called their den, she peeked her head into the darkness, her orange eyes wide as she tried to see if he was back yet.

"Fitz?' she quietly asked the darkness.

He was trying his best. FitzDutiful hadn't actually realised how hard it was to get a pack up and running. He suddenly had even more admiration for Peregrine and Fox who had managed to make it seem so easy. So far, he hadn't managed to live up to his promise to Raissa. There had been other wolves to find, borders to mark and wolves to chase out. Things seemed to be settling down though.

Unaware of everything that had transpired that evening, FitzDutiful had returned to the den early. He had hoped to find Raissa there but this time she was out - typical. Their schedules just didn't seem to match. Instead of going back out on patrol, he waited for her. He would show her he was keeping his promise - even if she wasn't there to always see it!

When she called out his name, his mind was jolted from pack things. They seemed to be forming a nice pack. Him, Raissa, Tempest and Bindi. It was an interesting dynamic and it hadn't been lost on him that he was the only male in the pack. Not intentional but interesting. Other than Peregrine and Elwood, FitzDutiful had always found it easier to get on with women. For now, at least, he put all others out of his mind and focused on the one in front of him.

"I'm here, Raissa." he called out, please to see her return. "I said I'd try to be at home more, and that's what I'm doing." A subtle reminder that he hadn't forgotten, nothing more.

A smile lit her face as soon as she heard his voice call out to her in return. She knew he was working so hard and putting everything forward in an effort to make this work and the fact that he still had time to keep his little promise to her warmed her heart. She quickened her step and padded into the little cave, spotting his figure now that her eyes had become more used to the thick darkness.

As soon as she reached him, she brushed her head against his cheek and took a seat beside him, his company making her feel better already. "I'm glad you're here. I've missed you." she spoke softly, hoping he understood what she meant. She understood that starting a new pack was a ton of work and she hoped that if he needed any help that he knew he could ask her. This was his dream and she wanted it to work out.

When she lay beside him, FitzDutiful was having to fight an itch to get up and go outside. He wanted to be patrolling, to be ensuring that his new pack was safe that his members were getting along and still here. None of them had fled or wandered away and for that FitzDutiful was grateful. He felt that soon they would be secure enough to send up the howl and make this official.

"Me too," he said, not really wanting to dwell on that fact. As much as he disliked not seeing Raissa, he wasn't really cut out to just spend his days, or nights, sat idle doing nothing. That was part of why they'd failed to see each other once she's moved to the Caldera. Fitz was an active wolf, he always had been.

"Have you met our pack mates yet?" he asked her. He wasn't asking Raissa to take a leadership role and wouldn't provide her any favours. If she wanted a high ranking place in the pack she would have to prove it the same way everyone else did. Part of that involved proving herself to the others. He was asking no more of her than he would have expected from himself.

Raissa gave her snow-pelted mate an odd look. He looked preoccupied, like he didn't really want to be there. Maybe what Bindi had said was true, Fitz really didn't care about her. The thought unleashed a flood of insecurity rushing through Raissa. What if this had all been a mistake? She had picked up everything, a comfortable new home, actual friends, an ultimately perfect life for him, and what if he didn't even care? She felt herself close up, no longer wanting to share anything with him. She had come here with the intent of fixing things, not making them worse!

Still, she had to answer his question. "Yeah actually, I met both of them. Tempest seemed really nice but Bindi called me a slut bag." she admitted with a sigh. She had really hoped that some of the wolves that came with them would turn out to be really good friends, but so far, neither of them stood out to her. Sure Tempest was really kind and all, but she seemed kind of plain to the fireball girl. And then there was Bindi. She was just flat out unlikeable.

Feeling a bit unwelcome, Raissa pulled away from Fitz and lay down a little off to the side, giving him some space as she studied him to try and figure out what was wrong. So far, this day had gone from good all the way to terrible.

FitzDutiful sighed as Raissa spoke and wandered away. He wasn't doing a very good job. He picked himself up and followed her to sit next to her again. It wasn't space from her he wanted and he didn't want to risk her thinking that.

"I'm sorry." he told her. "I promise it will get easier, but the beginning is always hard. We need wolves to get established - even if they're wolves we don't like. We have to try. Things are quite unstable at the moment. Until the moment we announce our intentions to the world and ground our roots solidly, it's going to be a turbulent ride." He paused. "It's made easier with you here to come home too."

FitzDutiful was discovering new things about himself. As he approached his second birthday he was finding that his yearling instincts were rapidly decreasing. He wanted to settle, to find a home. He realised he should share this thought too. "Once we're settled we could start thinking about puppies..." he trailed off and bumped his entire body along hers. Even though he would not mate with her in that way until children were an intended, or at least a welcome, outcome, he wanted her to know that he did want her that way. It just wasn't his way to do that, especially not while they were insecure in their home.

Raissa's ears twitched as she listened to Fitz explain that things were going to be hard. She knew that, she just didn't really want to except it. Things had been so much easier when they were in a pack that was already formed and secure and a little part of her wanted to go back to the easy way. But the rest of her knew that this was worth it, it was worth it because she to be with Fitz and once things got settled, everything would be a million times better.

Her gaze softened when he got up and came to sit by her again, showing that he did care. She leaned against him and sighed, looking out of the cave where the sun had fallen below the horizon completely and the sky was getting increasingly darker, filling with little sparkling dots. She wanted to have his puppies someday, but she knew it wouldn't be for a while because they had to get everything figured out.

"I can help, you know. You don't have to do this all by yourself." she murmured quietly. The burden of starting a whole new pack must be huge and she wanted to help take some of that weight off of him. That's what being in a pack was all about, sharing the responsibilities. "Whatever you need, I'll be there. And then when everything is good, we can definitely start thinking about puppies." she finished, giving him a swift kiss on the cheek.

It seemed as though everything had righted itself again. Raissa didn't move away from him when he went to her and for that he was pretty thankful. Things were precarious enough without Raissa doubting him too. "Thank you. I'm actually enjoying all the hard work, but if it ever gets too much I will be sure to say so." He wondered if she wanted to be a leader in their pack. He had never asked her, she had never said as much. Realistically they didn't have enough wolves to need two leader positions filled but maybe in the future it was something she saw for herself.

"So when our pack is established, after everything you've given up for this, what can I do to help you with your future goals?" FitzDutiful didn't want to be a taker in this relationship. He wanted it to be a partnership where both people felt they got the best out of themselves and the other. Right now he needed this time, but there would be time in the future - hopefully the near future - where the two of them could work towards her goals.

Raissa hadn't really thought about that. For a while her dream had just been to live a happy life, and it seemed she had already got that wish, so now she had nothing to dream about. Raissa knew that she had given up a lot to let Fitz go after his dream, but she hadn't really expected him to do anything in return. Seeing that he sort of was her dream, she really didn't want anything else. That might have seemed shallow to some, but for a girl who had grown up without anyone who loved her, it was the best thing in the world.

"Well my dream is sort of already covered." she explained, loving the way it felt to be snuggled up next to Fitz, actually talking, not just the fluffy little stuff but the real conversations. "Really, I just want to start a family." she admitted even though she had already told him she wanted puppies.

FitzDutitful felt slightly astonished when Raissa said she had no dreams other than raising a family. Suddenly he felt very ashamed at his itch to be out patrolling and earning trades. It was one of the ways in which they were different, but he respected her no less for it. He would make it clear at their first pack meeting how his rank system would work and, if a high rank was important then she would work for that. If it wasn't, that was fine too.

"What would you want to name our puppies?" he asked, wondering if there was any custom in her family. "In my family we name our children the traits that we wish for them to uphold. For example, my father was Dutiful, my grandfather Prosperous and my grandmother Honesty. Strangely, everyone seems to be true to their namesake." He trailed off that line of thought. As much as he wished to pass down this custom of naming pups, he was willing to forsake that for Raissa. At least, for their first litter he wouldn't push it.

Even though she really didn't have any specific dreams, she did wish to help with the pack. She was good patrolling and hunting and as soon as her paw healed completely, she could go back to her warrior training. But of course, if they had pups then that would have to wait. But how cool would it be to have a warrior mom? She smiled at the thought.

When Fitz explained his family tradition her smile widened a little and she looked into his eyes. "I think that's an adorable tradition." she answered honestly, but a little part of her said that she would prefer something different. She crinkled her eyebrow a little as she thought about it. "Do you think we could use that as their middle names?" she asked cautiously, not wanting to offend him.

She was a continual surprise. FitzDutiful, despite being a qualified counsellor, was quite abrasive when he had to be. With Raissa he definitely hadn't had the silver tongue that had potentially caught her heart. If he wasn't careful he was going to lose it. He was having to learn when to turn on and off this alpha switch. Right now he was her mate, not her alpha.

"Maybe," he said, definitely open to the possibility. "Or if we're lucky enough to have more than one, we can name half each. Other you can name this litter and then my family traditions for the next. There's plenty of options and we have time to decide yet! What kind of names do you fancy?" He was very sincere in his question, he wanted to know what kind of naming his wife would prefer.

She liked that he was open to the idea, that he was willing to compromise for her. She had thought about naming half one way and the other half a different way, but then she felt like she would be excluding the pups somehow, and that didn't sound too appealing to her. What if one day a pup with a personality name asked why his brother didn't? Oh sorry, we just decided he didn't deserve one as much as you. Not gonna happen.

Even though she really didn't like the first idea, the second idea he mentioned seemed a lot more reasonable to Raissa. Having one litter with personality traits and one without seemed like a much better option.

His question surprised her, as she hadn't really thought about the fact that there were different kinds of names. But he was right. Personally, her family's names all meant something.

"Well, in my family we used names that mean something to us. For example, my name can mean warrior, beloved and carefree in different languages." she explained. It was sort of similar to his tradition of personality traits expect they used different forms of the words.

"That's adorable," he told her, when she explained her family's tradition. "Then this litter the first names will be from your family and the middle names from mine. The next litter we swap the order around!" He loved the idea of combining both of their traditions into their future family and swapping it meant that they never had to give up one to be passed down. This was a compromise he could make easily. After all, she had given him his pack.

"How long does it take for a litter?" he asked, assuming that women knew these things. Their pack was almost stable, almost at a point when wolves might stay to support children. He didn't have a clue how close Fox had been to giving birth when they had left the Caldera, nor did he have an idea how long a female's heat lasted or when it occurred. This was his first year of being physically capable of producing children and everything was new.

Raissa smiled at that idea. It was a perfect compromise and the names would most likely be absolutely adorable. "I think that sounds perfect!" she agreed happily, imagining how perfect their little babies would be, running around on their tiny paws. It was a good place to raise puppies too, safe and spacious with lots of things for them to do without getting them into trouble.

She stifled a giggle at Fitz total cluelessness. It was absolutely adorable on him as he tried to act all serious even though he most likely had no idea what he was talking about. Little did he know that she hadn't even reached the breeding age yet. "Well before I can even get pregnant, I have to come into heat first. You've been around a girl in heat before, haven't you?" she asked warily, unsure if he even knew what she was talking about at all.

Raissa seemed to think his lack of understanding funny and all of a sudden her felt his walls go up and his body stiffened. It was as if she was explaining it to a child. Surely, if he could talk to anyone about these matters then it would be her? She wasn't supposed to laugh at him! It didn't matter that she had stifled it. Her body lay along his and he had felt it.

"No." he answered, almost sullenly. "I only reached my 22nd month, in December." He wasn't going to say more than that. FitzDutiful had an understanding of how babies were made. That was partly instinctual anyway. He just didn't know what came later. No one had ever taken the time to explain to him how long a pregnancy lasted or what occurred in the months between conception and delivery. All he knew was that this year was the first year the actual yearning would arrive. 22 months, the sexual maturity age when everything changed.

She suddenly felt bad when she felt his body stiffen, his voice more guarded. She hadn't meant to laugh at him, she was just laughing at their situation, how they both wanted pups but neither of them were actually ready for them yet. In any way. And he just looked so cute when he was confused that she couldn't help it.

"Hey, it's okay. I will only get my first heat in the spring." she explained, hoping that he would understand that she was pretty new to all this as well. "Then, once I get pregnant, it will be two months before I have the puppies." she explained, remembering some of the females in her birth pack explaining everything to her.

Raissa explained that he heat wouldn't arrive until spring and FitzDutiful looked immediately downcast. "Ah," he said. He wished it was sooner for he had been looking forward to it - not that he had a clue what would be happening or how it would even occur. Then it hit exactly what she'd said.

"Wait. You've never been through a heat before either?" He had known she was a yearling, he just wasn't aware that females also had to wait to reach a certain age like males had. He had assumed that the two genders developed differently and had different maturity patterns. Maybe that would still be the case. If she hadn't been through a heat before then how did she know when it would occur? Did females just... know?

They were both so new to all of this that all of a sudden he was worried that he would do it all wrong. Briefly he conjured another What Would Peregrine Do moment. His previous alpha had managed to have two litters quite successfully. FitzDutiful wasn't aware of all the drama that had occurred from his first litter though he knew the first hadn't been the most successful when it came to parenting. Regardless of how successful the relationship had been he had managed to do the actual creating of puppies.

Surely FitzDutiful could grasp it too.

Raissa could relate to his sudden down cast mood as she too felt a little upset that she would have to wait before they could have their puppies. The only reason she knew that her heat would come soon was because she could feel it, feel herself teetering on the edge. She knew it would happen soon, she just didn't know exactly how soon. When she thought it would be at least a couple weeks away, little did she know that it could happen as soon as tomorrow.

She shook her head at his question, not sure exactly what he thought. Females couldn't go through a real heat until they were actually able to have puppies. "No, I haven't. Females can't go through heat until they are actually ready to have puppies, which is at 22 months, just like males. I'm 23 months, so my heat could actually happen any day now." she explained, hoping what she was saying was actually true.

Raissa explained that females hit the same sexual maturity as males and all of a sudden FitzDutiful felt elated. Until he remember their situation. "I hope it's not too soon," he cautioned. "I don't want to miss it and yet we ought to have another two members at least so we can be doing pack hunts and keep you well fed!" It was more important to him that his children had a chance of survival than they had puppies. Little did he know that when a female was in heat the urge would be undeniable. He still believed he was rational and could resist anything.

With all that in mind, FitzDutiful suddenly felt exhausted. It was almost bordering on too much. With the pack only just established and Raissa in heat pretty much any minute it was almost more than he could of dreamed for. If she wanted puppies bad enough he wouldn't deny her the opportunity but his head cautioned it wasn't wise.

Laying his head on his paws, he drifted into a deep, if restless, sleep.

While he felt herself agreeing with Fitz and hoping that it wasn't too soon, she also felt herself wanting puppies more and more, the desire getting stronger and stronger by what seemed like the minutes. She nodded at Fitz's words, feeling complete love by how much he wanted everything to be perfect for when the time came.

With each passing minute, she could feel herself getting closer and closer to the edge of her heat and soon she feared she would fall of the edge. Something in side her warned her that it was too soon to have puppies, that things would turn out badly, but the rest of her wanted it desperately, so desperately that she knew that when the time came, she wouldn't be able to resist.

With all the looming possibilities and worries, Raissa too felt her eye lids get heavy and start to droop, her breathing slowing into the deep breaths that came with sleep. She snuggled up next to Fitz, his warm body comforting hers and she finally let the dream world tug her out of reality.