Life sure hadn't been nice for the Lanius-Rochester family with all the madness and frustration going on, especially not now Burke barely talked to her. Every night she struggled to fall asleep, afraid her nightmares would rule over her like a plague like they had done the first week in Teekon. She was afraid; afraid her kids might be taken from her by Dickhead Damien and Nasty Nemesis, afraid Burke might never talk to her again, afraid little Pyro wouldn't make it through the famine. She was even afraid she might be locked in here forever, or maybe killed with her pups. Burke probably hadn't noticed her tear-stained face every morning, but yes, she had cried- a lot. Here she thought they could be a happy family, that she would get accepted, that her children would grow up to be just as great as their father. But all seemed lost now.

This morning she awoke to find no Burke behind her and the kids sleeping. Had he really left? N-No, he would never leave her to die here. Her thoughts wandered off to all the nice moments they had spent with each other, all leading up to their last interaction thus far. Him growling and snarling at her while she had only tried to help. She could understand part of why he had done it, but that did not make it hurt less. She loved him, she was quite sure of that now, and feeling as if her love was not returned made her feel even more miserable. not even the sight of the sleeping Vassago and Pyro could cheer her up as a single tear streamed out of her good eye. She nosed to two balls of fur softly, giving them both a lick on their tiny heads, before there was someone in the den opening.

A small gasping noise left her mouth as the dead duck was placed before her, and she quickly shoved her face into her own fur to remove her salty tears. As she looked up again, she saw the handsome sight of Burke, and it hurt her heart seeing his face. She wanted to love him, she wanted to be close to him and she wanted that attention to be returned.

She sighed with him, her eyes focused on the ground now. The apology was accepted, though it still didn't tell her if he loved her in return. She still needed to say something though. It's okay... It's partly my fault too... She breathed, trying hard to control her voice and her emotions. If only-... If only I hadn't gone out that day when I was in heat, none of this would've happened...

She sighed again at his words. Perhaps they had both been a little irresponsible. But neither of them could have predicted the famine, and neither of them could have predicted how the Dark Brotherhood would react. They certainly weren't the victims here, but to call them the evil doers wouldn't be right either. Still, Malice only blamed herself and the Brotherhood; for if they had been kind and had given her a chance, all their lives would've been better. Pyro and Vassago were the victims here, for if they remained, they would be used. Malice was a great fighter, but she couldn't defend her pups from a whole pack minus Cicero and possibly Kendra. 

Then why do I have this feeling all would've been better if I had stayed at Phantom Hollow? She spoke, her voice cracking. She didn't mind the cursing, only pulled a "shh, the kids are sleeping" face before moving on. I mean, just look at us. She let her eyes dart around the den in which she had been for way too long. We are prisoners! She exclaimed just slightly louder, but tone still soft and cracking here and there.

Her golden eyes were only slightly sparkling with tears, but unlike burke, she could control her emotions and talk about them openly- most of the time. It was no secret that she was avoiding confessing her love for him, fearing rejection more than anything. Just the slightest nudge and their whole bond would be broken. It's not your fault, Burke. They are foolish, minus your daughter and Cicero. She admitted. I have witnessed what a great leader you are and how well you treated them, even Nemesis for that matter, and to toss you aside like that, I just-I just wanna... She made an angry face and a clicking noise with her tongue, moving her neck at the same time. It was meant to look like a wolf breaking their neck, but it might have looked just plain silly. 

She let the air slowly flee her lungs, her eyes now resting on the dead duck he had brought. She didn't feel hungry at all, her emotions being enough to feed an entire pack, but to refuse meant trouble with the stoic man. Thank you... She said softly, pulling the duck just a little bit closer before eating. At her first bite she noticed that her body was actually pretty hungry, but she couldn't eat it all. That was not the way she was raised, for even the brute of Lucifer Peak had been taught manners- most of them at least. She left some meat for Burke, since she really wasn't the only one in this world. Besides, Burke starving would mean death to her as well.

I meant before...us Malice said. N-Not that I am not happy with our... friendship, it's just... She tried to correct it, but did not succeed. She didn't want it to sound like: "Everything would've been better if I had never met you". She would trade the whole world for a moment with him. It's complicated... She said at last, her eyes blinking away the nervousness that came with them being together. 

Kendra is, oh how to put it... Malice agreed. Peculiar. She ended, having no other words in her dictionary that described the dark girl better. She flinched at the slightest mention of the woman slapper Damien, and she did not feel the need to talk about him. He was a waste of her breath, and even a single second spent on him was a curse. But next came a juicy talk; the former alpha talking shit about his former beta. Absolutely fucking splendid. She replied sarcastically as well. This pack will surely go the distance with them as leaders, bloody hell. She rolled her eyes and let out the smallest of chuckles.

Malice nodded in agreement at his statement. They are blinded by hate and disgust. They could learn some friendship and compassion from the Moonlit Wolves. She almost wanted to laugh, but then remembered she had left Moonlit Hills to rot and die in hell. She was not the best, she had learned, and this just proved it.

And then came a question that was not suspected. I-I... She stuttered, flustered by the sudden change of subject. I think I do a little more than trust you with my life... She replied vaguely, her eyes now pointed at the ground, her cheeks getting hot.

Malice felt like they needed to label their relationship. It would only hurt her to keep her hopes up and that in the end she would be rejected anyway. She didn't like this unstable thread they were dancing on, afraid of falling-not for falling for him, but for falling in depression if he didn't feel the same way. She loved him, but perhaps she was living in a dream. 

I didn't mean it offensively. Malice replied calmly with a small smile. She was quite nice to me. She even said she was excited for her half-siblings. Malice informed, not knowing if burke knew of Kendra visiting her. The young girl had been so straight forward and curious it had confused Malice. Still, it had been quite humorous too. With you as the alpha, I can surely believe that. Malice complimented. She then looked at him.

He seemed so conflicted with himself, and that wasn't a good sign. What if he barely liked her? Was she not pretty with her scar? That damned Judas with his weird-ass ways of dealing with things. He really doesn't love you dear, just give it up. Malice sighed at the quiet. It had been a confession for sure, but she doubted he would do the same. Of course, she was not perfect, but neither was he. well, in her eyes he was, but still. She sighed again at his reply. Burke... She breathed out.

Malice chuckled sweetly. Of course he knew. He knew her better than most. It had certainly been sweet of Kendra to visit. She had been so lonely that day with Burke out patrolling. Well, he didn't have to do that anymore. She wondered why he was still here. He had said he just worked and worked to forget his pain. Was he now slowly breaking? Could she fix it? No, she couldn't be this Meldresi. She could, however, be Malice. Perhaps his former mate had been beautiful, sweet and kind, but were that things everyone had to have to be loved by Burke? She didn't think so. She was Malice, and he would love the daughter of Lucifer. She would make him forget about his tragic past.

She awaited a response anxiously. Every time he breathed, she held her breath, afraid for the words; "I do care for you, but not in that way." This was her first love confession, even with her former mate. Cog and her had been nothing, this was real, this was something. And when he did finally reply, she let her breath slowly slip out. Was this a confession? She didn't know, but as he settled, she scooted closer to him.

Burke, I am afraid I have fallen harder than ever before... She whispered, hoping to not wake up Vassago and Pyro.

Never would Malice love for wealth. Well, maybe the past Malice would, but not the Malice laying next to Burke right now. This love had organically bloomed, and that-in her book- was the best. Perhaps only now could she understand her father's decision to chose her mother. It had been love, too. Now she saw, now she felt herself how powerful it was. And now she imagined one of their sons killing Burke. Oh, how devastated she would be- how devastated she had made her father feel with killing her mother.

Her body tingled all over at his touch. Never had he done this, but she had. It was lovely, just like him. Perhaps she had gotten what she had hoped for; a family Neither do I... Malice admitted honestly. I guess life and fate are just weird in this way. She shared her thought, but then yawned. It was only morning, but laying in a den for around 3 weeks had drained more energy out of her that one might think. Still, she wouldn't sleep, not yet.