She did not feel well, walking back to the den where Qilaq lay. To her surprise, the girl was still fast asleep. That normally only occurred after Qil had her walk, and unknown to her, Qil had escaped the den many times while Nemesis was not watching. Not that it would bother her if she found out, a sense of adventure was always a good one. Her paws had began to ache, the new weight of her stomach proving to slow her down. She was not accustomed to this life; walking at a paced stroll wherever she went. On the occasion, she could make a steady lope, but not for too long. She wondered who else would notice her state, for she had not told anyone outside that she was carrying, if they did not know already.

She entered the den, secretly hoping to find her mate, but did not. Her heart sunk, oddly, but yet she had hoped to speak to him about the children. She had not even told him yet. She missed him. The rarely hunted together, for her state had made her less and less inclined to do so. He had hunted for her on many occasions but... she missed his presence, not for recreational purposes. But she would not disturb him while he was busy. Instead, she lay her head beside Qil's sleeping body, urging herself to sleep though she was restless with longing.

She was drifting in to sleep, but the presence of her mate interested her more than rest. In no time, she felt his snout ripple through her nape and rest heavily on her neck, but it did not bother her. She peeked one eye open to check on Qil, and sure enough, the girl was fast asleep. The three of them, like that, was perfect to her. Soon, there would be more, countless more, but perhaps that was exactly what they needed. To much calm made things boring, but imagining a litter of children surrounding her form made her heart swell marginally. That was only more reason to get them out of her.

As they lay, unmoving, she wondered what Kove felt. Surely, her nerves had to be shared. Or perhaps he wasn't as thrilled as she was, for he had done this before. With his other mate. Her thoughts turned sour as she pondered it. Perhaps, this was all old news to him; uneventful and boring for the excitement and anxious wait for children was something he had already experianced. She hoped that wasn't the case. She did not want to be second best to all his first experiances. 

She considered dropping the subject, but her temper had only increased as she thought about Xan's true mother, Scarlett. She had never thought much about the woman before but mixed with her hormones, and her dread, she could not shake the feeling she had put on herself, that she would never come close to Kove's expecations as a mate. She found herself wishing she could peer inside his mind and find out what he was thinking, what he expected, what he wanted. And so, she asked him. "What are you thinking?" She did not shift her head, for he was close enough to hear her whisper. And because, the last thing she wanted was to wake Qilaq.

It was reassuring to hear him thinking of her, which caused her to smile just a bit. Always? That seemed unlikely but somewhere she felt that she ruled the majority of his thoughts and for that she was pleased; however selfish it was. As he pulled himself off her, she felt instantly cold, alone even but that was soon replaced as he snuggled into her side.

It was his next statement that made her eyes snap open and her body tense. Had he always known? Of course he had, she could never hide anything from him. But it was assuring, she had not known how to share the news in the first place. This was better. Yet, his follow-up statement had her condfused. Of course he would meet them, unless he had any plans of leaving which in that case he would never see them again. She knew had had left his family before, but she was adamant on the fact he would not leave again. He could not. The mere thought of his made her eyes narrow, unsure of where he was going with this.

But, this.. was unexpected. He relayed his inner worries to her, and she accepted them with an open heart. They had not really done this before, but she felt at ease, even as he confessed his troubles. "They could never hate you," Her dry and unused vocal chords chiming her response louder than she had meant to. Qilaq still rested. She swallowed, knowing only her words could put his mind at ease. She had noticeably relaxed, "You have done nothing to spark such a thing," His worries were for nothing, as far as she was concerned, he would not fail them and he would not walk away. Or he would have nothing to come back to.

"You will not mess up," It came out more forceful than intened, mostly because she did not like his lack of confidence, it almost made her frustrated. Though truly, it was because she cared too much. "You will not loose us," Now that, came more gentle, his tone of voice bringing tears to her eyes that he could not see. "I don't think I could loose you and still be okay," It was quiet, humble even. Her cold tone was no more. However sappy her words were, they were completely genuine. She highly doubted she would ever be the same if not for his love guiding her to be better, better than the crazy sadistic bitch with no boundaries that she was. Perhaps, she was still a bitch, but one for the right reasons. He and the family they created was that right reason. 

She stayed silent for a little while, lost in her own thoughts. Blinking away the water that glossed over her eyes, she looked back to Qil, and instantly remembered what she had thought of. "I uh.. I was thinking Astrid, for a girl," She had always liked the name, Strong. She did not want a weakling as a child, but someone who could overcome turmoil that was bound to happen in Blackfeather Woods. But she knew Kove would want to name some of his own, and so she was open to hear his suggestions, for she had no others. If it was possible, she further leaned into him, wishing them to be as close as they could be. She displayed this affection for no others despite her family, and this was her time of rest before she emerged the next day with a mask of ice.

She listened, uninterrupting for she knew that he had a lot to say. Nemesis had never inquired what exactly had happened to Xan's siblings, Kove's first children but that they had gone their own way; opting out of following their father to the dark woods. In a way, she could not blame them, Blackfeather was not for all. She blamed Kove's former and inferior former mate for that, having witnesses firsthand the aftermath on what it did to Xan. She cast her eyes aside, knowing as much as she that how their children would view their father was not up to her or him; not really. They would only do their best, and hope that they did it right. "I know," Her reply came calm, for she had never lost faith in the fact he would not leave them. He has assured her many times before. "I know," She buried her muzzle within the folds of his fur just a bit more, listening to the rumble of his chest as he continued. She smiled. Astrid Apaata, it would do her well. 

Yet, she abruptly pulled away as Kove suggested that damned name. "You're joking," She deadpanned, though she knew he had to be joking. Right? Ever since the story of the Issitoq became known to her, she had reeled at the though of it, the moment she had been thwarted by a child. It would have been ironic to name her child after such a thing, perhaps even humorous, yet she would not have a child named Issitoq. The name in itself was laughable. The dark woman attempted a groveling look but could not, giving into his smile and reflecting one herself. A strange feeling erupted within her throat, something that felt like laughter yet sounded quite terrifying. She could not stop. Her sides quivered, body racking with uncontrollable spasms of cheer. The Silencer struggled to catch her breath, gasping awkwardly in between. "We are not naming our child Issitoq," Awkward giggles followed her reply, unable to stop it from coming from within her. She collapsed against his flank once again, recovering from the laughter which she had never experianced before, not quite. 

The tale of the Issoq was now something she had come to eye roll at, though, her fear of the thing had been completely relevant at the time. She had been but a child -- last year. Never again would she believe any fables, tales, stories or lore that passed by her ears, 9 times out of 10, it was a young boy trying to play a trick on a jumpy woman. With a soft grunt, she confirmed Kove's words, "You're right, we won't," Laughter settled, and so did she, burying herself within the folds of his fur with no intent to move, and with little intention did she have to continue the topic of names and the headache it caused. Names were a fickle thing, a decision based on spontaneity rather than planning. One look at the kid, and she would know. Minutes later after insiting to leave the naming upon the hour of their eventual birth, sleep took over the woman as well as her husband.