Despite vomiting a grand total of four times since she'd been rudely awaken at dawn that morning, Jhala was determined to leave the den. She'd kept her sickness hidden from Reek best she could, but it was obnoxious. At least now she'd not been so hot, just nauseous. Today was, however, the day she knew she needed to find Vuk. Her friend had told her some time ago that she was in love with Reek-- or at least had feelings for him. She was now his mate... that was not something she could keep hidden.

She felt terrible for betraying her friend-- but what could she do? Say no? Disappoint the one wolf who she'd sworn her loyalty to? Of course not. She'd do anything to make him happy-- even if that meant this. She did not love him back in the same way, but she'd had feelings for him. Wasn't that enough?

She stands at the entrance to Vuk and Terich's den, hoping the other would be home. She lets out a light bark to draw attention but speaks regardless. "Vuk?" she calls into the den, "I need to talk to you, please."

Vuk didn't speak when she appeared from the den-- she looked ragged and broken and far less like the girl that Jhala had once been friends with. She hesitates to speak, contemplating not telling her at all, but she knows it's the right thing to do. "Vuk, I... I think that... I uhm..." she breaks off, shaking her head, her tail tucked beneath her undersides. She tries to start over, but a wave of nausea hits her and she has to brace herself in order to stay composed, taking a few deep breathes. 

"I've been a little sick... lately..." she mutters, her gaze still not reaching her friends. 

"I just came to tell you that I'm sorry," she finally forces out, quickly and filled with fear. "I hurt you... and... I didn't mean to but I did. Reek asked me to be his wife... and... I don't know why I really don't but he did and I couldn't let him down." Her rambles are long and maybe don't make as much sense as they did in her head, but she at least says what she came to say. 

With a final breath, she speaks once more. "Vuk, please forgive me," she says softly, a crack shattering the center of her plea.

Anger bubbled in her in an almost uncharacteristic way-- but she knew better than to rant to Vuk about the Daystar right now. A bigger plan, bullshit. It was just the shittiness of the world, no 'higher power' would purposefully put someone through so much. Herself included, wolves would always be filled with greed and selfishness. They'd betray each other until the end, because that was apparently how the fucking world worked. She shook her head at her comment, but didn't respond. Deep down, Jhala knew that Vuk was aware of her 'ignorance', but it was not worth the risk to speak so openly.

The patch-work girl spoke again, and works caught in her throat. "N-no... Vuk," she murmurs, her voice low and followed by a long whine. "Please don't leave... I'm sorry Seff has left you but... the Grotto needs you..." she says, her amber gaze trying to find the blue eyes of the other. Selfishly, she adds, "I need you." 

Unable to stand the thought of another person leaving, Jhala shook her head furiously. "No," she says firmly, but tears welled in the corners of her eyes. "I don't understand why," she adds in reference to her second comment. She means she doesn't understand why Vuk has to leave, but truthfully doesn't understand why she would be granted children-- and by what union? what did that mean? "I... what if he isn't lost?" she asks hopefully, her ears flicking once before falling back to the top of her head. "Raas has a plan for everyone-- what if he lead Seff somewhere?" she asks, though the words are bitter on her tongue. 

In another childishly selfish murmur, she says, "You can't leave too."

Vuk insists, and her expression hardens. She can't make her stay, she knows this, but she just can't understand why she won't stay. Vuk was all she had in the world--Reek, of course, but to Jhala Vuk would always be different. 

"Fine," she mutters, stepping away from the woman. "Go find Seff, I'm sure he's looking for you." With another step back, her gaze turns behind her, looking far off in the distance. Seff probably left of his own free will, people don't steal puppies-- but fine. Whatever Vuk wanted to believe. "Good luck," she adds in one last mutter, and begins to leave, her strides lengthening clumsily. If this is what she wanted, fine, leave the Grotto. It would crash and burn with the rest of this damned religion-- at least.