+- Wolf RPG (https://wolf-rpg.com)
+-- Forum: In Character: Roleplaying (https://wolf-rpg.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=5)
+--- Forum: Archives (https://wolf-rpg.com/forumdisplay.php?fid=11)
+--- Thread: Dawnlark Plains And kiss her lips and take her hands (/showthread.php?tid=18293)
And kiss her lips and take her hands - Saēna - October 10, 2016
Saena's stalk was born of both hurt and anger. Anger that her daughter would speak to her in such a fashion, hurt that they truly believed she didn't love them, and fury that Reek would even dare to claim he hadn't tried to hurt her by taking her daughters in the first place. She refused to believe that all the hurt inflicted upon her wasn't intentional. This was merely the final blow, but because Laurel and Indra had made that choice—or more accurately, Laurel had made it for them—she had no choice but to respect it, even if she'd wanted to spring at the leader of the Larksong wolves and take his life then and there. In her delusions, she thought she'd have won.
But she'd turned and stalked away instead, almost heedless of @Casmir and Laika beside her, and she hadn't stopped. Not until she was in the middle of the plains, disoriented by the vastness of it, and unable to see straight for the tears that blurred her vision. There, she dropped her haunches to the ground and let the emotional pain seize her with wracking sobs, half hopeful that at least one of her former pack would seek her out in the aftermath, and also half hopeful that she would be left alone to drown herself in her sorrow.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Casmir - October 12, 2016
the trip had been for fucking nothing. Reek and his fuckery had made Indra run away and Laurel turn on her mother; the boy felt the familiar stirrings of rage just beneath his breast, but they were quelled by the overwhelming exhaustion that now threatened to consume him. he had not slept nor eaten since departing the borders of the little rat-hole where the bastard had taken the girls, and now he had parted with Laika for a time, too tired and riddled with anger to be of any comfort to his mate.
he sought out Saena almost unconsciously; the sight of her pale fur and downturned head stirred both relief and sadness in the Mayfair boy. he was overjoyed that she had returned to them, but to lose her daughters! he could not imagine how she was feeling. silently he moved to her side, a breeze ruffling through his dark fur, and settled along her upon his haunches in a quiet show of solidarity and support.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Saēna - October 14, 2016
When Casmir's footsteps became apparent behind her, Saena's ears switched back and she almost visibly flinched. She wasn't sure if she wanted to deal with him right now. Part of her desperately wanted her cousin's comfort and reassurance, but another part of her blamed him for what had happened. After all, Silver Creek had failed to keep Reek from her daughters, Casmir and Laika had failed to bring them back in a timely manner, and now they all had to deal with Laurel the Supreme Brat, a fact Saena could hardly come to terms with.
She also didn't want to admit her own fault. She'd disappeared, but to be fair to herself, Saena had to acknowledge the fact that she hadn't known what she was doing. She didn't remember. She sucked in a deep breath as Casmir drew alongside her and settled him, and then she turned her head to regard him. No doubt she failed to hide the hurt in her eyes, but they were likely also flinty. Casmir didn't deserve it, but she couldn't help it. It was possible that Laurel was in such a sad place because of Silver Creek, too. It might not be solely Reek's fault, although his involvement was not in question.
"How did this happen?" she asked in a strained voice.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Casmir - October 17, 2016
Casmir felt Saena's eyes upon him, and felt for the steel in his soul before he turned to face her. this was as much his fault as anyone else's; maybe if he'd sat on Laurel and Indra and ripped Reek's throat out when he had the chance, this wouldn't have happened. his cousin's expression was a mingling of anger and hurt. it provoked a low whine in Casmir's throat, one he choked back. "Reek came to Silver Creek demanding to see the girls. I have no fuckin' idea how he found us, Saena."
"the girls had been out running around and he was so close to the borders; anyway, we came up on them quick, Spring, Laika, and I. got the kids back. Laurel started acting out ... Reek, he just expected us to hand them over. anyway we tried to mediate because the girls were getting upset, and Reek left, but not far enough, because he lured Laurel back out and Indra followed."
the telling of it was difficult, but she needed to know; she deserved to know. "Laika and I left as soon as we could, but it wasn't soon enough. i --" and here Casmir's voice trailed away; here he broke off his words and looked forward. he couldn't blame Saena for the illness that had taken her from them, but he hoped that she wouldn't judge him too harshly for what had happened.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Saēna - October 26, 2016
The lines of Saena's face hardened the longer Casmir spoke. It was unfair to blame him, and yet she did. She blamed all of them. They hadn't fought hard enough to keep the pack's children safe. She hadn't been there to be the judge of their actions, but she knew what she would've done, and it would've ended with Reek either dead or running. He certainly wouldn't have made a second attempt at getting to her children when she was finished with him. But she hadn't been there, and the Creek pack had proven too weak without her.
"Why was he not attacked on sight?" she wondered thickly. After all, that had been the policy at Phoenix Maplewood. When had it changed? "Why was he not driven away? The girls would get upset anyway, and now look where they are. Look what he's done to them." She pressed her heel into the floor, ground her pad against the dirt, and growled low in her throat. There was nothing she could accuse Casmir and the rest of Silver Creek of without enduring criticism of her own, so she opted to say nothing further on their actions.
Instead, she announced, "I'm not going back to Silver Creek."
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Casmir - October 26, 2016
of course she blamed him. how could she not? if he'd killed Reek right then, none of this would have happened. and he had no answer to her gritted questions. the boy's ears swept back against his skull at his cousin's thinly concealed rage; he gazed at the ground between his paws until she had finished, punctuating her anger with a final decision.
Casmir was unsurprised; his throat thickened all the same and he blinked rapidly to keep from the grief of another loss overcoming him. she would not come home to the pack she had founded, but there was nothing for her there. perhaps for the first time in his life, Casmir was keenly aware of how empty she must feel, how filled with rage and frustration and helplessness.
"what will you do?" he asked instead, his voice a hoarse whisper.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Saēna - November 02, 2016
"I can't," she added when she chanced to look his way and saw the grief sweeping his expression. What would she do in Silver Creek? She would be destructive, if not completely to her own self. She would return and attempt to overthrow Spring, especially now that she had little left to keep on going for. It wasn't like she was suicidal, but with nothing to lose, she would attempt to gain something through any means necessary... and in so doing, would shatter her pack.
She couldn't do it. Part of her wanted to, as payment for not having what belonged to her returned, but she simply couldn't. She cared too much about Casmir and Laika to do it to them, and deep down beneath her self-contempt and her jealousy, she knew Spring deserved better than her rage.
"I will stay near," she told him, "so when that bastard does to them what he did to me, I'll be here for them." There were other reasons, too. The opportunity to kill Reek might just present itself someday. Besides, Warbone had entranced her somewhat, and she wouldn't be alone. "I met a wolf in the mountains. He went through something like I did, where his memories just disappeared, and he came back to find everything he'd worked for was taken away. I'll probably look for him." Who else could she share her life with but someone who knew loss as keenly as she did?
What she said next wasn't fair, and she knew it fully, but she said it anyway: "you're welcome to come with me." She wanted nothing more than to have her family with her, but that would mean taking followers from Spring, and that was the unfair part of it. She rather doubted Casmir would stay with her, not when Laika was closer with Spring than she'd ever been with Saena, but she threw it out on a whim anyway. "It should have been you anyway," she told him, and having long since recovered her memory of shortly before she lost it, she shared, "I wanted you for a Beta, but didn't get the chance before... well. You should have become the Alpha. Til the girls were old enough, or maybe forever." Instead, Silver Creek had defaulted to Spring... and while Saena didn't resent her for keeping the pack afloat, and was in fact grateful, she did resent the fact that the pack she'd spent half her life building had not been given over to her family.
She also thought that none of this would ever have happened with Casmir at the helm of the pack, but she couldn't say that for sure, and dared not say that aloud. She couldn't blame Spring for the loss of her daughters, nor for her own shortcomings, even though jealousy and grief both fueled her choice to not return. She, Saena, was the one to blame for that.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Casmir - November 11, 2016
he thought as saena did, but anger fell across him like a veil when she mentioned that she would not return, that she would run off with some dude she found in the mountains. he wanted to ask her what the fuck, but his logical self reenagaged. she had lost everything: her kids, her mate, her mind. she had come to only to lose laurel and indra to their father, and milo to death. Cas noticed she didn't mention the boy, and for that he also would not. his cousin had suffered enough. and he was ashamed of his kneejerk thought.
her next words brought the boy's head up; his single ear cupped forward to listen. she wanted him to come away from the Creek. for a brief moment of burning clarity, Casmir knew he must go. his allegiance had been to Saena from the very beginning, since he had followed her from the Maplewood, carried her children, protected her with his life. he had left Donnelaith for her, and now the pale woman asked him to come away again.
the hot flare died into a burning ember. Laika would not leave Spring, and how could he ask her to do so? her heart belonged in the pack that Saena had founded, and Casmir understood the passion of his mate's heart. could he depart her to follow Saena? surprisingly, emotions flooded the Mayfair again and he stared blankly at the earth before gathering himself with a gentle sigh.
"i love you, Saena," Cas murmured after a few heartbeats had passed, holding his cousin's gaze for as long as he dared; she still fostered a sense of submission in him, if he was being honest. he said no more; he knew that she would understand his meaning, even if she did not agree with it.
the boy knew in the next moment the glissade of heartbreak deep within him.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Saēna - November 13, 2016
She hoped, even if it left Spring bereft of followers, that Casmir would agree to come to the mountains with her. Saena's children were as much his as her own. He had lifted them when their legs grew tired, aided them in their great crossing of the wilds, and raised them when she was unable to be there to do it herself. Saena couldn't imagine lying in wait for the day her daughters were freed of Reek's manipulation without Casmir at her side. She couldn't imagine welcoming Indra or Laurel home without him there as well. He would be her second, her right hand, and he would be there to bring their girls back under their safety once more.
For a fleeting second, Saena thought it might be true. There was a resolute spark in the man's eyes, and she dared to be hopeful, but it just as quickly faded. Her face fell. Casmir couldn't leave the creek. His life was there, even if the girls and Saena were not. As surely as Saena couldn't return to the creek and attempt to resume a life that fell short of what she'd worked so hard for so long for, Casmir could not give up the life he'd built to follow her. Not again. Though he would never be unwelcome, at least by her, should that ever change.
"And I, you," she returned, though her tone was solemn. She wished she could have it all, but it simply wasn't possible. It never had been. When Saena became a leader, she had to lose the plateau. When she became a mother, she had to lose her mate, and then her home. When she finally became settled and content with a life elsewhere, she had to lose her memories. There had never been an instance in her life that she could recall where she simply gained something. Saena's life was one big give and take, and this was no different. To remain here, and leave the creek behind, and rebuild, she had to lose Casmir.
"I understand," she breathed at last. There was nothing left to be said about that. But Saena wasn't done. "Casmir," she voiced, a little louder and stronger, "the creek is yours. It belongs with my family. With you." She scrunched her brows, fighting back tears, both because he would be leaving and because it would hurt Spring. But Saena didn't care about that. She cared about her family, and what was owed them, through her sweat and blood and tears. She hadn't worked so hard for someone else's glory, even if it was Spring, a dear friend. Saena had not built the creek for her. "Reclaim it."
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Casmir - November 16, 2016
guilt settled into Casmir, that he had not accepted Saena's offer. how could he be so callous? she had given him all that he had. anger then spoke, demanding to know why the pale woman dared ask this of him, but it died away. it was decided, and there was no room for a quarrel. tears pressed themselves behind his eyes, and finally Casmir gave up the ghost of his fight, and let one fall into the tipped-up corner of the smile he feverently offered his beloved cousin.
slowly, he approached, tail flagging at his hips, muzzle outstretched to touch her for perhaps the last time, if she allowed. in many ways, Saena was his closest friend. he had grown distant from Eilidh and Constantine and Emaleth -- Deirdre alone understood him, and she was devoted entirely to Donnelaith. his parents were gone; Saena and her girls were all he had left of any other family, and now they would separate too. Cas didn't know if he was being dramatic; he could feel nothing beyond the great rift splitting in his heart.
but her words beckoned him to lift his chin, and understand what it was Saena sought to give him. she had built the Maplewood, and when that fell, she had found the strength to build the Creek. and now she gave it to him, over Spring's head -- he remembered how he had refused to follow the other woman out of the ashes of Saena's disappearance, and that feeling came to him now. Spring was much beloved, but the Creek belonged to Saena.
and now to him, it seemed.
Casmir nodded, a small gesture. "i will." his tones held grief, an upturned vessel waiting to be broken, but it held firm. he would do as she directed; he accepted fully the great legacy Saena gave to him now.
RE: And kiss her lips and take her hands - Saēna - November 17, 2016
Casmir's nod was the closing of one chapter, and the beginning of a new one. With that solemn gesture, he penned the last word with a flourish, and set down the quill as well. Perhaps Saena would see him again, but if so, it would likely not be for quite a long time. Despite her own hidden heartache, she was okay with that, if only because it meant the both of them would grow in their own way. If Casmir did as she bid, and went back to the creek and took it in his name, then he would wed himself to her legacy, and would therefore always be part of her life, whether they were distant or not. It would become his own, and he would secure a future for himself and his lineage, much as Saena had sought to do when she founded it.
And Saena? She would surely begin anew. Casmir need not worry about her. "Good," she said with an approving lift of her lips, though her eyes shone with tears. "Farewell, Casmir. May we meet again someday. You will always be welcome." She hoped she could say the same about visiting him, but she supposed her refusal to return and her attempting to overrule the creek's current leadership would complicate any warm welcome she might receive. Oh well. The creek was behind her, the mountains ahead, and Saena had a new story to begin writing. She could not dwell on the past, not any longer.