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+--- Thread: Ravensblood Forest i've got a heart, i've got a song (/showthread.php?tid=23073)
i've got a heart, i've got a song - Aria - September 07, 2017
vomits up a post
aria had a lot of time to think... and perhaps she'd delayed this too much. komodo, her first connection here on this island (that she could remember), had left. she expected him to return-- and in all honesty, she expected him to bring her with him. but she had lost all of her footing here on the island and simply couldn't bare to remain. everything was foreign, and it felt empty. even constantine, who she'd actively avoided since their last interaction, had disappeared altogether. her attempts to avoid him became easier and easier as his scent became more and more feint.
torn between this island-- which was all she knew-- and the urge to fill in the empty spaces in her memory, aria was completely lost. she felt... empty, but also so filled of things. she just didn't remember those things, and staying here, alone and without a single, recognizable soul, did nothing to fill in those gaps. but did she want to fill them in? constantine said that she wasn't happy, and she wasn't sure she wanted that.
but was she happy now?
stuck in a rut, unsure if she was even trying to get out, aria had a dream-- maybe even a nightmare. a wolf with icy eyes-- caramel coated and dripping in cinnamon-- lunged. it was a tussle, bites and scratches-- but a quick blackout later and aria was standing over the wolf's body-- covered in flies, pupils blown. she woke up panting, whining, terrified. her dream-- with constantine-- it had been real. was this real?
without a second thought, the pearl left. this was too much, suddenly, and she didn't think she could do this all alone. komodo had left, his scent was long gone... but constantine, she could find constantine.
she found a small shred of his scent somewhere south of the island, and realized with great displeasure that he'd left the island altogether. it was not ideal, but she would leave. there was more out there-- more than this god-forsaken island. she swam across-- it was not as deep or rough as it had been during the storm, which made sense, she supposed. she arrived at shore, thankfully, and set off again.
she found his scent somewhere weird-- somewhere she didn't fully recognize-- though it wasn't too far from the island. and after that the trek was hardly more than a light stroll. she found a forest... clearly marked by the dark male. did it matter if she just crossed over? would he care? were they strangers? she couldn't tell. so she sat, and stared forward, finally mustering up the courage to call to @Constantine.
and then she waited.
torn between this island-- which was all she knew-- and the urge to fill in the empty spaces in her memory, aria was completely lost. she felt... empty, but also so filled of things. she just didn't remember those things, and staying here, alone and without a single, recognizable soul, did nothing to fill in those gaps. but did she want to fill them in? constantine said that she wasn't happy, and she wasn't sure she wanted that.
but was she happy now?
stuck in a rut, unsure if she was even trying to get out, aria had a dream-- maybe even a nightmare. a wolf with icy eyes-- caramel coated and dripping in cinnamon-- lunged. it was a tussle, bites and scratches-- but a quick blackout later and aria was standing over the wolf's body-- covered in flies, pupils blown. she woke up panting, whining, terrified. her dream-- with constantine-- it had been real. was this real?
without a second thought, the pearl left. this was too much, suddenly, and she didn't think she could do this all alone. komodo had left, his scent was long gone... but constantine, she could find constantine.
she found a small shred of his scent somewhere south of the island, and realized with great displeasure that he'd left the island altogether. it was not ideal, but she would leave. there was more out there-- more than this god-forsaken island. she swam across-- it was not as deep or rough as it had been during the storm, which made sense, she supposed. she arrived at shore, thankfully, and set off again.
she found his scent somewhere weird-- somewhere she didn't fully recognize-- though it wasn't too far from the island. and after that the trek was hardly more than a light stroll. she found a forest... clearly marked by the dark male. did it matter if she just crossed over? would he care? were they strangers? she couldn't tell. so she sat, and stared forward, finally mustering up the courage to call to @Constantine.
and then she waited.
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Constantine - September 07, 2017
Aria’s voice echoed across the trees – a voice he had not expected to hear again. It was as if time stood still for that moment, and Constantine considered the possibilities that unfolded before him. Did she suddenly remember who he was? Is that why she sought him? R, by chance, had she simply left the island, and the forest was the first place she had come to?
His expression blanked – his form moving with the fluid motion of a shadow as he sought her out. He expected nothing – the pain lessened that way, and even as her beautiful and pale form came to view, he forced the flinch of nostalgia that flickered in his chest away. He had begun to move forward in his life now. The claiming of the forest was a work in progress, but he felt confident that by the winter, a pack would arise by his paw. He even had @Durnehviir now, who, while he could not define their relationship, he sought comfort in her embrace.
His fiery eyes swept over her – a ravaging storm in their intensity, and yet he only offered a light shake of his muzzle, as if confused by her presence – which he was. “Aria,” he greeted, choosing to break the silence as he lopes closer to her. “You’ve left the island.”
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Aria - September 07, 2017
he arrived, somewhat swiftly-- aria imagined he always moved like that. she couldn't confirm this, but it felt right to think this about him. she dipped her head gently, tail still and low. "i came to find you," she said, as clear as she could manage. something in her voice shook, or perhaps it was her whole body that shook. she had never experienced this before-- not before the island-- and was unsure how to control it. something in her just welled with emotion, and she couldn't conceal it.
as an afterthought, she dipped her head a bit lower. "i hope that's okay," she added softly, pale gaze wanting to find his fiery gaze, but the pressure of this being his territory-- and being so unsure of their relationship-- held it steadily on his nose.
as an afterthought, she dipped her head a bit lower. "i hope that's okay," she added softly, pale gaze wanting to find his fiery gaze, but the pressure of this being his territory-- and being so unsure of their relationship-- held it steadily on his nose.
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Constantine - September 12, 2017
He had never seen her in such a state before – he could not describe it. Her voice seemed to waver as she spoke, and a light frown pulled at his features for a moment. Was she trembling? His eyes softened with concern, though a knot furrows on his features as his brows pull together. “Yes,” he rumbled, studying her carefully. He does not know how to act before her – their old friendship would have had the shadow runner sweeping forward, embracing her safely to his side and encouraging her. She did not know that Constantine. “Why wouldn’t it be?”
He shook his head, pulling himself from his reverie. Before she could truly answer, he nodded to the forest – an invitation. “Come – we’re not a pack yet, but I’m sure I can find you something to eat and a place to rest.”
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Aria - September 13, 2017
constantine accepted her without a moment of hesitation. she felt guilty, to cling to him like this-- it seemed like once upon a time she had caused him some sort of pain. but he was all she knew-- arguably all she knew-- and she needed him around to ground her. relieved, aria let out a soft whine and quickly moved forward, her tail wagging slowly. grateful, she offered him a soft touch to the shoulder. perhaps, if she had remembered him, she would've taken him in a more affectionate embrace, but this touch was as much as she knew they could be comfortable with... for now, at least.
she was so grateful, she didn't know how to repay him... and she somehow wasn't sure if this was something that needed to be repaid. he seemed to be in charge of a pack here, being a useful member was possibly payment enough for his kindness.
she nodded, moving to follow him, and then broke the silence almost immediately. her voice still wavered at first, still shaken by the anxiety that plagued her fate at the borders, but hearing constantine's warm offer reply felt soothing-- it felt familiar, but not in the way she wished it could. "i am a trained advisor," she told him, her gaze flitting to his fiery eyes. she felt the need to share her skills, he was her leader now afterall-- but wait, she told him that... didn't she? even further... had he already known that about her? of course, constantine had not joined donnelaith until her dream of being a well-respected ambassador had died and her love for scouting had been born-- but how could aria have known that? "you know that... don't you?" she said anyway, referring to their last conversation-- if anything.
she was so grateful, she didn't know how to repay him... and she somehow wasn't sure if this was something that needed to be repaid. he seemed to be in charge of a pack here, being a useful member was possibly payment enough for his kindness.
she nodded, moving to follow him, and then broke the silence almost immediately. her voice still wavered at first, still shaken by the anxiety that plagued her fate at the borders, but hearing constantine's warm offer reply felt soothing-- it felt familiar, but not in the way she wished it could. "i am a trained advisor," she told him, her gaze flitting to his fiery eyes. she felt the need to share her skills, he was her leader now afterall-- but wait, she told him that... didn't she? even further... had he already known that about her? of course, constantine had not joined donnelaith until her dream of being a well-respected ambassador had died and her love for scouting had been born-- but how could aria have known that? "you know that... don't you?" she said anyway, referring to their last conversation-- if anything.
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Constantine - September 25, 2017
She was hesitantly warm – lost in her state, and he felt a surge of sorrow envelop him. What had happened to the pale dove when he had left her with the Moonspear wolves? She had seemingly been happy when he had gone – usually within the presence of Floki, the pack’s Beta, and now.. now she stood before him, her past erased from her mind and holding herself with an uncertainty he had never seen in the proud woman.
She sought answers, and he wasn’t sure he had them.
At her words, he paused quietly, his pace slowing. Given they were not a large group yet – a group of two, it seemed, as the youthful wolf he had first intercepted had long gone – there were no established caches. That did not mean he could not muster her up some food.. or, if they found Durnehviir, the trio could hunt something larger together.
“Do you want me to tell you what I know about you?” He hadn’t known she was a trained advisor – it made sense, of course, but the Aria he had known had been Donnelaith’s Beta, and then it’s Alpha.. and her paws seemed to itch for small bits of travel.
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Aria - September 27, 2017
thankful that constantine had said it, aria nodded quickly. "please," she said softly, her ears pinning to her head, "maybe it'll help... i want to remember it." but of course, she had one question, just a quick one, that she hoped constantine would know. "when did i come here? how long ago?" to her, she was a ripe yearling, but the signs of age on her body were clear... she was not old but, she was not so spritely. there were wounds on her body-- old scars, healed long ago. she decided she must've been here for at least another year-- to get these wounds and make such connections with other wolves-- but how much longer than that?
her gaze found his face again, a stealing look that fell back before her again. her teeth gritted, she could only pray that this would help.
her gaze found his face again, a stealing look that fell back before her again. her teeth gritted, she could only pray that this would help.
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Constantine - October 12, 2017
As much as the shadow runner dwelled on the fact that Aria was not the same with her memory completely gone, he knew that he too was a completely different wolf than what she had known before. Darkness gnawed at him now – and while Durnehviir and even still, Aria, brought forward aspects of the Mayfair that had graced a happier time when he had lived among The Sentinels. Those times had now long passed – and with his family dead and gone, the pale dove before him was the last link he had to his old life. Aside from his feelings to her, the realization of this hit him like a ton of bricks – she meant something a great deal to him.
And he had no idea to figure out what that was specifically.
“I don’t know,” he replied, a light frown clouding over his broad features. “You lived with my family, the Mayfair’s, when I returned to them. I had left to travel when I was younger than a year, and returned in the spring after my first birthday. My father was the Alpha at that time – Lasher.” He paused then, his emboldened eyes studying her, looking for any flicker of recognition on her pretty features.. or any indication he should stop. “He also called himself Taltos. The pack, Donnelaith, lived close to the ocean in a great forest,” he nodded his muzzle in the direction of The Sentinels. “Casmir and Eilidh were my siblings, but Casmir had gone to live in a pack called Silver Creek. I believe you two were friends.” There was no knowledge of her love for his brother, or her physical relationship with his father. “My younger sisters were in training at that point – Deirdre and Emaleth. My father believed them to be witches.” He spoke no more on his thoughts on the matter – Donnelaith certainly had held a certain lure of other forces at times.
“You didn’t like me at first.” He recalled the look she had given him – the way she had avoided him at first. “I’m not sure why. We didn’t become friends until after my father passed – there had been a heat wave, and a famine from it. He perished because of it.” He paused again, wondering if he should stop, or continue, his eyes focused solely upon her delicate features.
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Aria - October 12, 2017
as constantine began, aria fell quiet. her insides still shook, nerves eating away at her very being, but she felt better-- less sick. the more he spoke, the easier she felt, but she wasn't sure she remembered any of it. Donnelaith felt eerily familiar to her, she murmured it once after he said it and the way it rolled off of her tongue felt... homey, but she couldn't recall any details. just the name, which wasn't too far from what she usually remembered.
lasher, taltos, deirdre, casmir, emaleth, eilidh... nothing clicked. had she known better she would've recognized casmir as the strong, amber eyed male from her dreams-- but as far as she was concerned that vision was constantine... and how would he know to correct her?
she wanted to prod at why she didn't like him, but he didn't seem to know. she couldn't really answer that question either-- not anymore-- so she just shrugged, a small smile flicking onto her features. but, the heat wave. her brow furrowed.
"i dreamt of the heat wave," she told him quietly, gaze remaining forward, "recently, i mean. your father-- he was dark-coated?" she had dreams like this often-- so realistic and eerily familiar, but this was the first time she'd gotten a word of their truth. painfully, she realized that the dream she had-- of the caramel coated she-wolf could've very well actually happened. what did that say about her? did constantine know about that incident as well?
when she received her answer, she merely nodded. "please, continue."
lasher, taltos, deirdre, casmir, emaleth, eilidh... nothing clicked. had she known better she would've recognized casmir as the strong, amber eyed male from her dreams-- but as far as she was concerned that vision was constantine... and how would he know to correct her?
she wanted to prod at why she didn't like him, but he didn't seem to know. she couldn't really answer that question either-- not anymore-- so she just shrugged, a small smile flicking onto her features. but, the heat wave. her brow furrowed.
"i dreamt of the heat wave," she told him quietly, gaze remaining forward, "recently, i mean. your father-- he was dark-coated?" she had dreams like this often-- so realistic and eerily familiar, but this was the first time she'd gotten a word of their truth. painfully, she realized that the dream she had-- of the caramel coated she-wolf could've very well actually happened. what did that say about her? did constantine know about that incident as well?
when she received her answer, she merely nodded. "please, continue."
RE: i've got a heart, i've got a song - Constantine - October 22, 2017
“Yes,” he answered simply, pausing only until she requested he continue. He could not know what she had been through – for he had not been there for her, as he had promised. Deirdre and Emaleth had likely burned with Donnelaith, and in his grief, he had also let Aria down. He felt the rise of regret form in his throat – a sense of nausea causing him to blink as he looked away briefly. “You were the his co-Alpha – so it fell on your shoulders to take the full lead when he passed. For some reason you never felt confident in your position – this was when we became friends.” He paused then, glancing back to her now. “I think you felt overshadowed by all of us – my younger sisters, especially Deirdre.. and myself. I think you felt as if the pack was meant to be one of ours.”
“Deirdre probably didn’t help this. She has..” He stopped, feeling the rawness in his throat as he realized his error. “Had a good heart, but she overstepped herself a lot. She was young – not even a year old.” Shifting his weight then, Constantine settled himself to his haunches, trying to maintain the illusion of calm, though within he realized he did not want to relieve these memories. Not anymore.
“It was then we found out that a newcomer – by the name of Rowan – claimed to be pregnant with my late father’s pups. This upset you greatly.” Now, when he reflected back on it, he wasn’t sure why – never would he know the reason had been that Lasher had been a lover to her. “I wasn’t sure she was telling the truth – and together, we asked her to leave. I made to escort her to Silver Creek, where my brother resided, but she wanted nothing to do with me after that and slipped away. Casmir, my brother, came to our borders shortly after in a rage. He denounced our family ties.” Casmir had tried to talk to him afterward – months after, too little too late.. and Constantine had allowed his brother to drift away. Casmir, with his short temper and ability to simply cut those beloved out of his life without blinking.. Constantine had not been willing to continue a close relationship with him.
“It was when Deirdre went ahead and gave Donnelaith’s allegiance to a pack that looked to settle right at our borders in the adjacent territory that I think things truly spiralled – without permission, she had promised them aide for their injured should they ever require it in return for their protection. Finally, at a pack meeting, when we suggested we try to train some of our pack mates for battle – self defense if they ever required it – Deirdre assumed we meant to become a pack of soldiers, and basically said we were dishonouring Donnelaith and all he had built.” He shook his head, releasing a soft sigh. Deirdre had been passionate about her beliefs – and she had refused to listen to what they had been actually trying to say.
“That was when you fully felt the pack was not yours to lead, and so you relinquished your title to Deirdre, as she had made it known to you that she wished to lead with you one day. You, myself and my littermate Eilidh branched away from Donnelaith then – promising to remain close but having the intention of establishing a pack and home we felt aligned closer to our own beliefs. Winter came and we never managed to find enough to establish – so we joined a pack southeast from here called Moonspear. You had a friend there by the name of Floki..” He trailed off, allowing the trace of a smile to cast itself wryly on his lips. “I never found the pack overly welcoming. When I went to go visit Donnelaith and see how Deirdre and Emaleth were.. it had been ruined by fire. There were no signs of them.. it was just gone.” His eyes then directed fully to her, studying her, wondering if anything he had said had stirred any sort of memory or feeling within. “I couldn’t.. go back. I couldn’t stay. So I left. I’m sorry. I thought you were safe with Floki. I think you loved him.”
He fell silent then, waiting for her to respond -- for anything. But as the seconds ticked past, and there was no response, he wondered if he had overwhelmed her once more. Inclining his muzzle gently, he gave a nod. "If you need more answers, I can try.. but for now, you should settle yourself in. Rest. Process everything." He paused for only a moment more, but then, with one last final glance, he began to lope away, allowing her some time to herself.