Hoshor Plains with a cloud that's way too high

night fell over the group of traveling wolves quietly and quickly. they were making good time on their travels, terance knew that soon they would be near the vale again. the group called it a night there, settling in the plains to rest. terance, taking advantage of the clear skies and open terrain-- no trees or cliffs blocked his view of the sky-- decided he would do some stargazing. he wondered if liffey would join him, knowing that she too had a love for the sky-- but she seemed occupied with rannoch. he didn't blame her, truthfully.

but it was no matter, even without liffey there beside him he had plenty of sky to look at and make mental notes about. though, after some time passed, he found himself glancing to his side, wondering if lyra was staring up at the same sky as him right now.

she caught his silent escape from their makeshift camp, and quickly she headed out after him. he was one of the few she had spoken to since her arrival — large groups still had a way of making the fae nervous — and as such she felt the need to reach out.

she watched silently from the distance for a while, captivated. it seemed as if everyone she stumbled upon except herself had an affinity for the stars, and casting her own gaze up to the sky, she understood why.

she just could not bring herself to love them.

he kept looking behind him and she wondered if he knew she was there. silently, she moved towards him, standing slightly behind and to his side, not wishing to break the silence.

he hadn't noticed her. though her pale pelt blended in with the snow she stood out against the dark skyline, but terance was not on high alert-- perhaps he should've been, but her was not. and so, though he was not one for jump-scares, and did not flinch when she slunk up beside him, terance was taken by surprise. had she been there for long? terance wondered if he'd done anything strange-- though he couldn't think of anything right away. he was not typically one to do stupid things on his own.

she joined him, but did not say anything. terance was comfortable always in silence, except for those that were made to be painful-- but seabreeze did not strike him as that kind of wolf, so he let the silence separate them for some time. for a few minutes it was quiet, and he remained focused on the sky, but occasionally his gaze fell to her for a few moments. did she want something? terance couldn't tell.

but finally, he spoke, his head turning to her, his full attention resting on her delicate features. "can't sleep?" he asked softly, shifting slightly where he sat.

sure, she said. that was an easy enough answer. sleep was often something she had difficulties with as of late. as long as it meant she didn't have to talk about how her first night in northstar vale, after she had been patched up, she had come to mato and asked —

do you have a favorite yes, that. and he had spun her the tale of artemis, and now there was a girl she cared about that reminded her much of that goddess, and now she was playing out her first meeting with the moonbeam prince again only this time it was with a man of darker pelt and (hopefully) a more interesting life.

if seabreeze had ever wondered what it'd been like to be on the other end of this conversation, terance wondered what it was like to be on her end. for months ago, he had this same conversation with lyra. but this time, his answer was different. seabreeze was still a perfect stranger to him, but the other day when she'd been so freely open with him left a precedent-- set an example-- and terance somehow felt comfortable sharing such a stupid answer with her.

"my mom used to make up constellations... used tell us these stories about them. i... don't think they're real, no ones ever known what i'm talking about, but that makes 'em special to me, i guess, i'll always kind of like them more than the textbook ones everyone else knows," he told her, his nose turning back up to the sky. did she care? something told him she didn't, but for some reason, she just didn't strike him as judgmental. he raised a large paw, leaning towards her slowly and using his paw to point out a cluster that maybe to her didn't look like much, maybe it didn't look like anything.

"that one, the bigger one, connects to those two down there... and then two to the right, and then there's a tail from the other side, one star left," he said, tracing it with his paw, trying to keep it steady with her line of vision-- but maybe she wouldn't even be able to see it, "it's called... uh... well... uh, superfun coconut." oh god, that was embarrassing. regret set in, he should've just went with taurus. the male fell quiet again, his cheeks on fire.

perhaps if she would have known that he had this conversation before as well, she would have some feelings to deal with. but perhaps it was best left unsaid, tucked secretly within both of their chests.

she followed his paw as he traced superfun coconut and her flews perked up in curiosity.

he was correct in the assumption that he did not have to be nervous with her. to seabreeze, all constellation stories were made up and this one was special. go on! i'd love to hear about it, she said without an ounce of judgment, for maybe she could collect the story to tell sunspire's future children, if any were to come.

red-hot, terance hesitated, shrugging gently. "it's stupid," he insisted, but the enthusiasm in her voice just... he continued anyway. "so, according to my mom-- who claims to be an expert on the topic-- superfun coconut is actually a fairy, exiled from his-- yes, his-- fairy kingdom. apparently, he'd gotten in trouble with the fairy queen, played with her wand--" now that terance said it out loud, it sounded more like an innuendo than it did an innocent childish prank, but he had heard these stories when he was only a foot tall-- "so she banished him out into the world, where he reeked havoc and chaos in all the ways that he could do... not in bad ways, i don't think, but the guy was a pain in the ass to have around, an inconvenience, if anything." he hadn't realized he'd actually fallen into the story, his ears were pricked, cupped toward the sky, and his eyes traced over the stars as he spoke.

when he fell silent, terance slowly turned to look back at seabreeze, wondering what her reaction was-- or if she'd tell him it was stupid. which, to be fair, it sort of was.

so? she says somewhat expectantly, it's yours.

and his story turned out to be quite fun! it did not matter to her if the fable was stupid or childish. what was a story if it did not evoke emotion? she was sure that little-terance and his little-siblings (if he had any) were enraptured with superfun coconut and his comedic games.

and so she paid attention, and she laughed but it was not with malice. she lay down next to him and grinned, drinking in his silly tale.

thank you for sharing that with me. i'm glad you got to have that memory with your mother. she turned from the sky and now looked at him. do you know you're not the first boy i have stargazed with? she did not mean, well, that. she was not flirting, but it was out there and now she hoped that it didn't come off as too unintentionally forward.

seabreeze slid down to her stomach, and though terance preferred to sit and stare at the stars he couldn't help but follow along. he slipped down to laid beside her, turned to one side to better see it-- it was more comfortable, more natural this way. he glanced away, a small smile on his features. "me too," he admitted softly, wondering how osprey was doing. he hoped well, he prayed she was doing well, anyway. at least he'd always have this piece of her-- always be able to tie her to the sky.

her next comment took a turn, and terance was suddenly fearful he had done something wrong... somehow. all of hydra and alya's comments about being forceful and direct came to mind, all piercing stones into his calm state of being. call it some kind of PTSD, or maybe that was dramatic, but terance was suddenly feeling his heart beat in every inch of his body. he stared at her with green eyes, suspicion tugging at their edges, though it wasn't filled with malice. but he calmed himself down enough to remember their last conversation.

"was it mato?" he asked quietly, his expression ironing back out into something more amicable and less, well, to be frank, scared.

"you wanna tell me about it?" he asked softly, ears tilting towards her.

she was merely opening up to him-- something terance had decided seabreeze did a lot. so why was he so anxious? this conversation was short and sweet and in every way innocent. it was just something about her comment-- maybe in the back of his mind there was a tiny alya, yelling at him about how this was a hint-- make your move, terance. but he studied seabreeze with a deep green gaze before he ultimately decided he was overthinking this. this girl was not the cerberus, there was no game being played. she was just being kind.

he swallowed, looking away with a small smile. it wasn't a sad smile, but it didn't seem happy. nostolgic, maybe, would be the best word for it. "would you believe it?" he began slowly with small bit of amusement, "you're not the first girl i've stargazed with either."

no, she says plainly. she appreciates his ear, although for now she did not want to indulge it.

she continues to sense his discomfort and it alters her mood, and she begins to shift uncomfortably before he begins to speak again.

really.

she supposed it wasn't that unusual, as wolves really didn't have a lot of things to do together. but still it strikes her as odd. perhaps their stories were just too similar for her taste.

i would believe it, she says, looking to him with a playful albeit sad smile, what girl would pass up the chance to stargaze with you? now that was forward, and she chided herself internally. what was this, flirting? they were packmates and practically strangers. what if she embarrased herself and he never wanted to be around her again? and what if he went along with it? she wasn't ready for.. anything. not so soon after mato, not so soon after zada. shame on you!

did you tell her about superfun coconut too? mato, he told me about artemis.

his face ran hot-- god damn how he didn't want to deal with this yet. the other other wolves to flirt with him were lyra's duplicates, and it was much easier to pretend that they were her. seabreeze was... different, entirely. terance couldn't just pretend, and his voice caught in his throat for a few beats. suddenly, terance couldn't think of anything so smooth to say.

"just the one," he said meekly, then realized how douchey that sounded and back pedaled immediately, "that's not what i meant i-- i think you know what i meant." he hoped she did.

then terance shook his head. "no, i didn't. i told her about taurus," he admitted with a tilt of his muzzle down. he stared forward for a bit before looking back at seabreeze, trying to figure out what she was thinking-- did he think poorly of him for lying to lyra? did she care? she probably didn't... she didn't know lyra. "it just didn't feel like something she cared about hearing."

"what'd he tell you about artemis?" terance asked, then paused, "you don't have to tell me, sorry, i know you said you... didn't wanna talk about it."

she watched him shy away and ducked her muzzle as the heat flushed against the tips of her ears, burning against the chilly winter breeze. she was terrible. how could she say something so intentionally inflammatory?

you're fine, she breathes quickly, trying to cover up her tracks. i don't know anything about any of the constellations, really. to me they're just.. she trails off, gesturing vaguely. stories.

she frowns at his addition. i'm sorry, she begins, but her usual calm and comforting demeanor had fled. she didn't know what to say. i care about it, she offered quietly.

she cleared her throat.

it was one of my first nights in northstar vale that i was well enough to leave my den. the stars were dazzlingly bright. he sat on top of a rock, and he was lost in them.

i asked him... what enchanted him about the stars, and he quipped back with.. 'i believe the question is who looks at the night sky and does not find the stars bewitching?' she breathes out a small laugh. that is just the kind of person he is. was.

she shifted, turning her gaze back to the stars. he told me his favorite was orion, and that he loved a woman named artemis. her brother grew jealous of their love, and devised a plan to cause artemis to kill orion on accident. she asked zeus to place orion among the stars.

she wondered if her woman of the night would be placed among the stars if she begged and pleaded with the gods she wasn't sure existed.

i asked him if he'd ever tasted sorrow. he hadn't. she had been rambling, and now she was bitter again. damn it.

i think i like superfun coconut better. she is tearful now, and quickly she makes a move to stand. she would not cry, not here, not in front of him. thank you, she breathes again before she makes back towards the others (unless, of course, he makes to stop her).

oh. so she didn’t care either. terance suddenly felt like leaving, like going home. he’d shared something stupid and childish with her— she didn’t even care to hear it. he’d overshared, and terance was embaressed. this was why he didn’t like to talk. but she back tracked, and that actually made terance feel bad for doubting her... seabreeze seemed different than Lyra, somehow, and she seemed to genuinely feel bad... right? terance wasn’t always the best judge of character but, this felt right.

”no, no, it’s okay i... i know what you meant. it’s not for everyone,” he said, trying to reassure her— still feeling a little sad though, honestly.

and then she opened up, and terance was a little surprised. maybe it was just to make up for the fact that she’d accidentally been rude about his pastimes but... he still appreciated it, somehow. he sat and listened with his ears pricked, soaking up all her little details and searching her face with forest green eyes. that was the story he’d heard too, it checked out, but the piece about sorrow threw him for a loop. he sat, silently, watching her. what did he say to that? he wasn’t rannoch— he didn’t have the words to heal her.

but then she was leaving.

his throat felt dry, but terance mustered up courage to speak. ”wait, seabreeze, wait,” he said quickly, making after her. she was sad, he saw it. and she could keep going, if she wanted, she didn’t have to listen to him but... he wanted to help. and terance suddenly didn’t feel like being alone, and even though she didn’t really like stargazing... he kind of wanted to be with her. ”i am... i’m sorry, about him. but, if you need me im here for you— even if it’s just like, to sit and listen. i promise.” was that lame? terance meant it.

i didn't mean it like that — she choked, her words coming out strained and desperate. she hated it. that bitter girl who had been scorned by her boy-king, stuck in the shadow of a girl who had gone missing. she would give anything to absolve herself of these feelings, and she especially did not want to have to burden terance with her inane and circular rambling.

even if he was good at pretending he wanted her to.
she thought she had been over him, but with the addition of zada's disappearance the wound had been forcefully reopened and salted.

she felt her blackened heart give a lurch and her stomach rolled beneath the gentle pressure of his gaze; she was shattering visibly and she hated it, she hated it, she hated it. she wanted it to stop. she was folding in on herself and soon she would go supernova and no matter what, she could not let him see.

her seaglass gaze lingered upon his sorrowful and confused emeralds, and the heat crept into her cheeks and shame socketed into her teeth. why did it have to hurt? she offered a few more choked breaths before taking a weary step backwards, turning her head away from him.

why are you sorry? you didn't hurt me.

terance's ears fell. "it's okay," he said softly, trying to be reassuring. god she seemed so upset-- he didn't know what to do. whatever sadness or emotion he was feeling was voided, now concerned only about her own turmoil. it was just something he did-- others came before him, always.

"no but... i doubt he apologized to you," terance replied, voice still low. did that sound stupid? terance was not good at making others feel better, ever, and seabreeze seemed to be crumbling fast. he wished she'd just stop-- wished he could help. "i just... i know how you feel-- i'm sorry, i wish she would've said something to me." he hesitated, feeling a little stuck.

she had been so swept up in the hurricane that was mato and the havoc he had wreaked upon her life that she had not stopped to realize that she had been being dramatic. perhaps this is really what had caused her downfall in tindome.

but could she blamed, given what she had been through?

i'm sorry, terance. he was right — mato had accosted her not once, but twice and then disappeared entirely; he wasn't even leading the pack anymore he had set out to make. she wondered what this girl had done to this poor boy's golden heart and wondered if still their stories were too similar to be coincidence.

fate brought her to sunspire. maybe they could heal together. she didn't know if she wanted a friend, especially one with similar circumstances, but maybe it was what she needed.

you shouldn't have to understand.

suddenly, something shifted. seabreeze was no longer defensive, something that was actually really intimidating to terance in this moment. if she was defensive he was even less helpful-- at least to him-- and he just wanted to help. but she loosened up, finally and very suddenly, and her words came less sharply and much more softer-- and terance felt a little better.

but he still didn't know what to say, because he agreed, but lyra never had any obligation to him-- not truly. she owed him nothing and it was his own fault for letting her get that big a grasp around him. so he just looked away for a moment.

"let's go back to the group-- we deserve some sleep," he decided to say, ears falling as he smiled, a bit of humor trying to resurface. hopefully she knew he didn't mean with him, because that thought never surfaced his mind. he just kind of got overwhelmed and... well a little sad, and she seemed sad too, and terance thought that warranted a good nights sleep-- if they could manage it.

she gave a pert nod as he changed the subject; perhaps he felt the same shifting, uncomfortable feeling in his gut under the scrutiny of such conversations with depth.

she didn't want to make him uncomfortable; not if they were to help each other. yes, we do. she sticks close to his side as they return to the pack and keeps a respectable distance from the boy, but nestles visibly closer than she was before.