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+--- Thread: Broken Boulder "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" (/showthread.php?tid=27344)
"Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Síff - May 21, 2018
@Lily I know it's says TBD but it sounded like she had been accepted? If I got that wrong, I can delete. For @Horosk mainly but AW!
It was night when the spirit emerged from her den. It was almost too simple to find her way out of the maw of the caves beneath the Boulder.
She was used to the dark. It was the people, so many and so close, on all sides of her that Liri was unaccustomed to.
The translucent wraith wove amongst the rocky field, the stones turned bone white in moonlight that peeked between the clouds. A breeze brought with it the scent and the patter of a few droplets of rain.
It was a peaceful night. But Liri could find no rest in it. Coming back to Teekon had left her restless for reasons unknown.
Perhaps it was merely that the last time Liri had lived in these lands, she had lost everything.
She settled beneath a rock at the edge of the clearing. It was large enough that the tiny woman could lie sheltered beside it and still see the night sky. With a last painful tug of her hind leg, she looked to the heavens.
The stars winked from above, tiny and beckoning.
The old ones said that we become part of the stars when we die. Could they be up there? Do they feel that I miss them?
A heavy lump settled in her throat and tears burned behind her eyes. She swallowed heavily and fixated on the stars with longing.
"My babies," the mother whispered, voice shuddering with loss. "I don't know if you hear me. But if you can...I love you. Mama loves you."
Liri could not help the tear that escaped as the only witness to her words were the soft sway of the breeze and the silence of the night.
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Horosk - May 28, 2018
The memory of Liri had passed over his mind multiple times since they departed from each other's presence, a fragment of his past caught within the present. It was an odd memory... the wraith with fur as white and that strange night with her intoxicating scent... he had worried for her. The ghost had departed so soon after their coupling, and Horosk had worried for her future - he had no knowledge of what had befallen her since that night. He found it difficult to think of her now, when he had found love in Mira, but still the recollection of Liri appeared in his head every now and then, and he did not truly blame himself for it. She had, supposedly, carried his pups after all.
But he had not expected to come upon her at Bracken Sanctuary, of all places. The Storyteller had exited the den only to catch some fresh air in the darkness, escaping the troubled dreams of Kelina and her piercing gaze. Horosk's paws had led him away and he had not fought against the pull, agouti tail swaying gently at his hind. He travelled through the monochrome landscape with no particular location in mind, padding amongst the rocks until his ears caught sound of soft whispering only a short distance from him. The outcasted Irya's interest was piqued, and he swiftly began to weave through the undergrowth until he spotted a pale figure staring up toward the charcoal sky dotted with glowing stars. Now the emotion in her voice was evident, and Horosk's brows knitted with concern. It took him a moment, but eventually he decided to gently call out to the woman, currently oblivious to her identity.
"Hello? Are you... okay?"
But he had not expected to come upon her at Bracken Sanctuary, of all places. The Storyteller had exited the den only to catch some fresh air in the darkness, escaping the troubled dreams of Kelina and her piercing gaze. Horosk's paws had led him away and he had not fought against the pull, agouti tail swaying gently at his hind. He travelled through the monochrome landscape with no particular location in mind, padding amongst the rocks until his ears caught sound of soft whispering only a short distance from him. The outcasted Irya's interest was piqued, and he swiftly began to weave through the undergrowth until he spotted a pale figure staring up toward the charcoal sky dotted with glowing stars. Now the emotion in her voice was evident, and Horosk's brows knitted with concern. It took him a moment, but eventually he decided to gently call out to the woman, currently oblivious to her identity.
"Hello? Are you... okay?"
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Síff - May 28, 2018
She didn't hear him approach.
Later she would curse herself for it, and for not recognizing his voice. Discreetly, she wiped her face against her outstreched legs and turned towards him, some excuse on her lips.
And fell silent.
Vividly, Liri had once been haunted by him after...well, after. She had wandered Teekon, the memory of lavender eyes and a honey coat still in her mind's eye.
She hadn't been in love with Horosk. Maybe in another life, another time there might have been something. But he had been there, and surpisingly, he made her feel safe. Whatever they might have been died with their children.
Seeing him now, was like seeing a ghost.
"You're real." A strange statement for one who didn't know what she had been through.
The apparition approaches on shaky legs, not all of them reliable. She forgets for a moment the coat of scars she wears, the limp, everything about her that would tell him that she has seen Hell.
"H-How..? How can you be here? I... I didn't know. I wouldn't have come if I knew," the last is a whisper, sad and guilty. The last thing she wanted was to make his life hard.
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Horosk - May 28, 2018
The moment her head turned to regard him with a gaze of chocolate, his heart almost stopped beating in his chest. It was Liri. As if his thoughts had summoned her from the depths of the past, as though she were stepping from a story he might as well have made up... but she was here. Real, alive.
So caught up was he in the shock, the realisation of who this woman was, that he did not first take notice of the scars littering her pelt. Her features were much the same as he recalled them to be, though the eternal wounds marking her body had grown in number, and her leg was, well... destroyed. A soft gasp fell from the man's lips, the first sound he'd made since she turned to face him - battered, bruised, but alive.
"Liri." He whispered, lavender eyes blinking out of sheer bewilderment. Her reaction was similar to his own, as though they'd both imagined their previous encounter and thought themselves to have conjured this odd bond. No doubt, his heart belonged very definitely to Mira, but he felt a need to protect this ghost. It was a peculiar instinct. He supposed... seeing her in such a state, he wished only the best for her for the rest of her life - he'd never wish harm upon anyone, and it truly did look as though Liri had seen the darkest sides of the world.
In flooded the questions, and Horosk had to take a brief step back to be able to acknowledge what she was saying - he was... he didn't even know! He was utterly stunned. He certainly had not predicted this encounter. "I..." He began, though his brows furrowed at her last statement. "No... it's okay, you don't have to avoid me. It's.. it's really good to see you. I mean, I wasn't-" The agouti man blinked again. "I wasn't expecting you to come here, but you don't have to leave or anything." The guilt lacing her voice made him feel penitent. He wanted to be there for her, even if they were to be nothing more than friends and he had so many questions, so many worries. As long as she didn't take flight now, maybe he'd get a chance to ask (though he definitely did not want to pry on things he should keep his nose away out of).
So caught up was he in the shock, the realisation of who this woman was, that he did not first take notice of the scars littering her pelt. Her features were much the same as he recalled them to be, though the eternal wounds marking her body had grown in number, and her leg was, well... destroyed. A soft gasp fell from the man's lips, the first sound he'd made since she turned to face him - battered, bruised, but alive.
"Liri." He whispered, lavender eyes blinking out of sheer bewilderment. Her reaction was similar to his own, as though they'd both imagined their previous encounter and thought themselves to have conjured this odd bond. No doubt, his heart belonged very definitely to Mira, but he felt a need to protect this ghost. It was a peculiar instinct. He supposed... seeing her in such a state, he wished only the best for her for the rest of her life - he'd never wish harm upon anyone, and it truly did look as though Liri had seen the darkest sides of the world.
In flooded the questions, and Horosk had to take a brief step back to be able to acknowledge what she was saying - he was... he didn't even know! He was utterly stunned. He certainly had not predicted this encounter. "I..." He began, though his brows furrowed at her last statement. "No... it's okay, you don't have to avoid me. It's.. it's really good to see you. I mean, I wasn't-" The agouti man blinked again. "I wasn't expecting you to come here, but you don't have to leave or anything." The guilt lacing her voice made him feel penitent. He wanted to be there for her, even if they were to be nothing more than friends and he had so many questions, so many worries. As long as she didn't take flight now, maybe he'd get a chance to ask (though he definitely did not want to pry on things he should keep his nose away out of).
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Síff - May 28, 2018
As she approaches, his eyes roam over her and the northron - for perhaps the first time - feels shame. Shame of what she is, what she's become.
He steps back and at once, she feels it in her heart. It's a physical pain that she doesn't quite understand. For a moment she had longed to be close to him, to press her muzzle to his fur and drink in the scent that made her feel like she was home.
It breaks her somewhere inside, and she thinks it might be her heart.
The pallid woman doesn't know how to approach the topic of their children. Part of her longs to tell him, the part of her that wants him to know her grief.
She wants to drag him down to this dark abyss and drown him in it. He's the only one who could possibly understand.
Selfishly, she wants him to feel her pain.
The fresh ache, pressing against her chest as if to escape the cage holding it, is so strong she nearly collapses.
Her children, their children, are dead. She was tortured trying to keep them alive and she lost them anyways. She buried their son and spent the last year losing her mind about it.
And Horosk wasn't there. Horosk didn't know them. Horosk didn't love them, not like she did. Horosk didn't speak to them everyday. Horosk didn't fight off pyschotic murderers to keep them safe. She did. And she lost them anyways.
Part of her is so heartbroken at seeing him, picturing whether their son might have grown up to look like him , that she wants to hurt him.
But she's the one who fled from him. She's the one that failed.
Another part of her wants to spare him. Wants to hold her children close to her heart and keep them secret. Liri's not sure she's ready to share them.
"I," she starts, and stops immediately. The grief and the past are caught in her throat, choking her. The spirit clears it and tries again.
"I don't know what...I didn't expect to see you again."
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Horosk - May 30, 2018
The guilt grew stronger with every second that ticked by like a clock, as if the moments they spent together were timed and he was limited in the things he could say, the things he could do. It shouldn't feel like that. That night, she had fled before another word could escape his jaws - he had wanted to say... he had wanted to say... stay. But she had been gone in a flash, a ghost melting into the darkness. He'd been left to wallow in the silence, mind floating adrift as the mixed waves of emotion washed over his thoughts - he'd been confused. He supposed, back then, he'd only been a lost boy. An outcast, fleeing from his home in search of something that he needed. The missing piece, the key to his story. Perhaps he had thought maybe she was that key. But she'd gone.
Truthfully, he hadn't stopped thinking about her. For many days after that encounter he had worried, he had worried some more... he hadn't been able to get the snow-coated girl out of his head, out of his heart. Perhaps when Semira had come along, had comforted him in his confused sorrow, she'd taken away some of the hurt and replaced it with joy. But now, looking at Liri, he could see that she had not found a saviour to take away the pain.
He did not pretend to know what she had suffered, the hardships she had endured. There was no doubting she'd had it far worse than Horosk could ever imagine, but the look she gave him. It made him break inside. Perhaps he deserved to feel what she had, perhaps it was only right that he experienced a look into the horros she had seen, for maybe if he'd been brave enough to follow her on that night he might have been able to suffer it with Liri. So she wouldn't have been alone.
The storyteller casted his gaze downward even as she spoke, lavender gaze falling to the floor. His paws drew him slowly forward, carefully as though he were treading on a thread. "I'm sorry," the agouti man whispered, emotion pooling into his voice as though he were apologising for all his wrongs, all the things he could have done but didn't. Whatever had happened, Liri did not deserve what had befallen her. He didn't know how... he didn't know if it was possible, but he only wanted to make it up to her.
He only wanted her to be happy.
Truthfully, he hadn't stopped thinking about her. For many days after that encounter he had worried, he had worried some more... he hadn't been able to get the snow-coated girl out of his head, out of his heart. Perhaps when Semira had come along, had comforted him in his confused sorrow, she'd taken away some of the hurt and replaced it with joy. But now, looking at Liri, he could see that she had not found a saviour to take away the pain.
He did not pretend to know what she had suffered, the hardships she had endured. There was no doubting she'd had it far worse than Horosk could ever imagine, but the look she gave him. It made him break inside. Perhaps he deserved to feel what she had, perhaps it was only right that he experienced a look into the horros she had seen, for maybe if he'd been brave enough to follow her on that night he might have been able to suffer it with Liri. So she wouldn't have been alone.
The storyteller casted his gaze downward even as she spoke, lavender gaze falling to the floor. His paws drew him slowly forward, carefully as though he were treading on a thread. "I'm sorry," the agouti man whispered, emotion pooling into his voice as though he were apologising for all his wrongs, all the things he could have done but didn't. Whatever had happened, Liri did not deserve what had befallen her. He didn't know how... he didn't know if it was possible, but he only wanted to make it up to her.
He only wanted her to be happy.
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Síff - May 30, 2018
Her pain recedes as he stares at her, she can find no reason to hate him nor hurt him. It isn't his fault she's so messed up.
Liri feels fresh tears welling up from somewhere, perhaps the hollow place in her chest where her heart is supposed to be.
She meets his eyes, the same eyes that she dreamed of for years, and for a moment feels that same connection that drew them together.
If it hadn't been Horosk, if it had been another male - a stranger - who found her, would she have done it?
Liri doesn't think so.
He looks as broken as she feels and Liri wonders if he can read in her eyes the words on the edge of her tongue, the ones she can't say.
I'm so sorry. I tried, you have to know that. I tried and I failed them. If I had stayed, if I hadn't left you, they might still be here.
Horosk moves towards her on slow steps, as if time has stopped itself for them. Liri hesitates, afraid it's a trick for a heartbeat, fearing he will feel what she can not hide if she touches him.
But his apology strikes her and she finds herself pressing close to him in an embrace.
She'd forgotten how tall he was, his scent. She buries her head against the ruff of his neck and savors the bittersweet feeling of holding him close again after so long.
"I should never have left. I'm sorry, Horosk," her voice cracks, and she can no longer keep it hidden.
She clings to him, as if he can save her from the tide she's drowning in, and tries to hide the thing she can't say.
I think I'm still in love with you.
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Horosk - June 16, 2018
Something about her gaze, her eyes meeting his own, it caused a flicker of uncertainty in his stomach that rose like a small flame until it clenched his heart. Her face, it stirred the memories he'd buried away, the ones he'd replaced with the presence of Semira. There was no doubting he still loved Mira and everything about her, but still the image of Liri did not leave his mind. He was unbearably torn, torn between two who had found their way into his library of a head, his heart.
He thought again of that night, the moon reflecting into their eyes as she approached, moving closer until they were caught in a sort of embrace. Then the image faded and he was left with reality, the present - Liri, burying her head into his neck. It was as though the past was mingling with the current, the now, and he was unsure how to form a response. She apologised, but Horosk couldn't find a reason for her apology - if anything, it was his own fault. "It's okay." He whispered, instinctively touching his nose to her cheek, as though they were not strangers at all. "I should have gone with you." That much was true. He'd worried, but not acted.
Yet still he was caught, ensnared by a web of emotions. Mira. Liri.
He thought again of that night, the moon reflecting into their eyes as she approached, moving closer until they were caught in a sort of embrace. Then the image faded and he was left with reality, the present - Liri, burying her head into his neck. It was as though the past was mingling with the current, the now, and he was unsure how to form a response. She apologised, but Horosk couldn't find a reason for her apology - if anything, it was his own fault. "It's okay." He whispered, instinctively touching his nose to her cheek, as though they were not strangers at all. "I should have gone with you." That much was true. He'd worried, but not acted.
Yet still he was caught, ensnared by a web of emotions. Mira. Liri.
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Síff - June 18, 2018
Liri tries hard, strains, to not think of how this would have changed everything. If Horosk had been with her, their children would be alive right now. Together, they could have fought off Kelina. Liri would be able to run, or even just walk without a lurch in her step.
But Horosk is not hers. She knows without hearing it that his heart is as confused as her own - it does not belong to her.
It stings but Liri embraces the pain. This is her punishment to bear for losing them; any pain thrown at her will never be enough to drown out their absence.
"There was nothing you could have done," she says at last, hollow words meant to comfort him.
RE: "Did I haunt you, like a ghost?" - Horosk - June 24, 2018
Finish off here? Thank you for the thread <3
Her words stung, left a bitter taste in his mouth. There was nothing you could have done. Although meant to comfort him, he disagreed strongly with such a statement, and he'd never forget the other path he could have chosen. There was something he could have done. Even so, what's done was done - he could not reverse time and re-do his choices, re-tell his story.
A soft exhale left his muzzle, weary as the pair rested against one another. This encounter had thrown him off completely, and now he wished only to embrace the night and rest at last. When all was said and done, he was glad that Liri was still alive; she'd suffered things greater than he could imagine, and part of it was his own fault.
A soft exhale left his muzzle, weary as the pair rested against one another. This encounter had thrown him off completely, and now he wished only to embrace the night and rest at last. When all was said and done, he was glad that Liri was still alive; she'd suffered things greater than he could imagine, and part of it was his own fault.