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+--- Thread: Rising Sun Valley the knife's edge (/showthread.php?tid=2756)
the knife's edge - Bazi - June 15, 2014
Cloud cover had turned to rain - an established weather pattern in the Teekon Wilds, and one that Bazi struggled to get used to. She couldn't remember the last time clouds had been a minor feature in a blue sky rather than the entirety of it, and after several days of grey she hungered for sunlight.
Boredom had driven her to the edge of the Sunspire Range. She walked just north of Lower Arrow Lake, head down against the drizzle and expression swaying between neutral and sour, switching whenever the wind did. If there were any budding scouts in Swiftcurrent, they had not made themselves known to Bazi, and she walked sullen and alone along the foot of the dark mountain. If something interesting did not show itself soon, she would make for Horizon Ridge and attempt to goad their guardian into eating some more apples. That had been amusing - in hindsight.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 15, 2014
I can delete this and throw blue willow in here if yo uwant Cause I know you said you wanted to reaffirm some things before I threw Jace at you.
jace was walking in the lower mountain range, a faraway look in his icy blue eyes. He was not the same wolf he had been and he was far from where he had been. He was quick to anger and bitter thoughts ran rampant through his head. Now there was only fuel to the fire that licked and lingered up through his innards and settled like claws into his heart.
He was not watching where he was going and really not caring who he ran into, like a shadow wraith he stuck to the shadows. He was itching for a fight or something anything, he was becoming lazy at the moment. He didn't feel like hunting. He was so lost in his thoughts he did not see the white furred wolf that walked a little further away from him.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
This is fine! :D
Edit: I missed RP'ing with you!
Edit: I missed RP'ing with you!
But Bazi saw him. She froze mid-step, poised like a creature carved of ice. Only her eyes moved, flickering erratically between Jace and random, unimportant spots in the shadows that hugged his shape. She wasn’t ready for this. The Jace in her mind - the one she begun to build as soon as word of his departure had reached her ears - was not yet ready. It buckled like rice paper in face of the living, breathing reality, and took its imaginary sins away with it. Insanity, rage - sodomy. The Jace in front of her was not like that, no matter how much she wanted there to be an obvious reason to cut him out.
The dark wraith seemed oblivious to her presence, though she was as out of place against the greenery as a snowball in summer. Bazi held her breath, even debated letting him continue on without saying a word - but couldn’t. ”Jace,” she tried to shout. The word wobbled awkwardly on her tongue. Suddenly, there was a lump in her throat, and a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. She hadn’t see hair nor hide of her former pack-mate since his departure, and for all her careful preparation, when the moment was upon her, it was impossible to stick to the plan. The practiced tirade of insults melted in the heat of the emotion she felt now. The full force of it made her lower jaw shake, and the pale girl bit down hard in an embarrassed attempt to stop it.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
ahh I missed you too!
A voice reached his ears causing them to twitch. Ice steel blues turned towards the sound thinking it was Ame or Viatrix only to cause him to stumble mid step as they alighted upon Bazi. Emotions hit him like a rock slide almost enough to bring him to his knees. His eyes flickered from her to the ground and back again. He wanted to scream at her yet at the sametime hug her. His brow furrowed and he began to breath heavily in panic he was angry he could feel it crashing on him in waves fighting for control he dug his canines into his jaw until blood pooled from it.
A small noise came forth from his jaw a cross of a whimper and a growl. He tilted his head and spoke quietly as his large paws and legs tore up the ground as he strode towards her. Hello Bazi. He stopped a few feet in front of her and lifted his head to look her in the eyes and blue met blue but his gaze held a red tinge.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
Bazi hadn’t expected him to look so.. severe. He looked healthy enough, but his eyes were dull, like polluted water, and the undecided expression on his face made him look tense and uncomfortable. The girl he faced certainly looked deflated, but mostly calm - her heart thumped like a lone drummer at a funeral; even and slow. She no longer had any desire to fling accusations, and unless someone from Swiftcurrent betrayed her, Jace would never know those thoughts had ever existed.
”You’re in the Sunspire,” she stated dumbly, tail grazing the floor. There was no mention of the recent intrusion by Njal and the Creek wolves that had gone with him; that was business, and this meeting was personal. There was an undercurrent of anger in his hard gaze that made Bazi wonder if he blamed her for what had happened. That thought created a little bubble of anger in her chest, but the Creek girl suppressed it with a hard swallow.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
Jace studied her face eyes tracing over the intricacies of her femininity. He was unsure how to proceed into this meeting though a part of him was wounded by all of their betryal. those that had turned their backs upon him when he had needed them most. Hers especially was like the dull edge of a knife cutting him up, but though he wished to rage and storm at her, he could not. she had only been doing what she thought best when she sent him to hold council with fox alone save Ferdie. She looked far to uneasy and dejected and curse his soft heart but he didn't want to be the reason she looked deflated.
Jace turned blue eyes towards the ground not wanting her to see the anger and pain that pulsed there. her words made a bubble of dark mirth come up from his gullet and he chuckled a deep rich chuckle that resonated in his chest. Yes bazi I am on the Sunspire. You are in the creek. the last part an attempt at humor though darkly so fell flat. He licked his muzzle and squared his shoulders lifting eyes with internal fire blazing from inside back to her face. how have you been Bazi? her name like a gentle touch was reeking havoc on the vulnerable parts of his heart his best friend she had been his best friend and no where near to help him when his world fell flat and his heart shattered. she had not been there to help pick up the pieces.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
I’m in the Sunspire. You’re in the Creek.
The reminder stung. Bazi’s ears fanned back, slowly. If she had gone with Ferdie to see Fox, would things have been different? Perhaps Jace’s punishment would have been less severe - he might even have been lauded as a hero for protecting Nightingale and Sky. But it had not gone that way. Jace had stood up for Ferdie. Bazi would have heeded the fiery alpha’s words and driven her den-mate out of the Creek without question. She couldn't help but imagine herself in Sky’s paws, reaching out to touch her friend only to be leaped upon by some demon creature. What he had done was unforgivable, but Jace was a victim of his own kindness - a trait she simultaneously loved and loathed. There had to be a clearly distinguishable line, even if it cut through a few hearts; on this she and Fox agreed. Done was done.
Jace said something conversationally banal, skirting the real issue. Bazi responded with a moment of glassy-eyed silence before she breathed a great, long sigh. ”I wish you hadn't defended him,” the girl stated quietly.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
I wish you hadn't defended him those words reached a chord in his chest and froze his insides and he shifted and stared blankly for a moment only to laugh in absolute irony. his laughter cut off quickly and he looked at her through narrowed eyes. it would have been moot Bazi your precious leader did not listen to a word I said in my defense or his not a word. I did not kill him so she chased me away it did not matter my defense all that mattered was that I disobeyed her. I will not kill someone just because I am told too I'm not yet that bad of a monster. I do not need anymore black spots on my soul save in defense of me and mine. he shifted and a deep seeded sigh worked its way out of his maw.
what he did was wrong, but I did warn Sky and then I jumped to her defense almost getting killed in the process however it didn't matter because I would not kill him. you can call me ten times the fool Bazi I really don't care but if it was to be repeated I would not change a thing regardless of who it was. hate me if you wish but it is the truth the unspoken words were there had it been anyone in the creek he would not have killed them either. killing in defense is one thing had ferdie not surrendered he probably would have killed him but ferdie had submitted in the end and that changed things. He would not kill another in cold blood just because his leader told him too. Especially after she didn't listen to her subordinates at all.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
She didn’t like being laughed at, and her lip curled faintly when he did. It was difficult not to agree that Fox’s decision to booth Jace out alongside Ferdie had been been a tad rash, but Jace could be just as stubborn as the Creek’s leader.
Then there was that business with the soul. Bazi’s jaws tightened, but she kept a lid on any spiteful comments. She took a few moments to compose herself after Jace finished, exhaled gently through flared nostrils, and spoke again in an artificially soft voice. Every third word was marred by tremors.
”Did you offer to chase him off instead? You live with him now, so I assume you didn’t.”
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
Jace stared at her and spoke quietly Please don't Bazi. I really don't like being snarled at. It was a quiet warning, letting her know he was keeping control but only just. He knew it was faint, but it was there all the same. What did she want from him! He couldn't be perfect for everyone, he couldn't do what everyone wanted. He stared at her at her next question.
He sighed again Bazi you aren't listening. She was not listening to me, nothing that I said mattered, do you understand. The minute I told her that I wouldn't kill him nothing else mattered, it was moot. She did not listen to me about anything, what makes you think she would have listened to that, she wanted one of us to die and i refused to fight to the death and she got pissed off! He shook his head he was agitated so freaking agitated and he was tired of being a gentleman and he was tired of playing nice, she wasn't going to listen any better than her stubborn red furred leader and he was tired of it. He shook his head and his shoulders and wondered what else he could possible say. She obvious was lookiing for a reason to blame him so he might as well give her one, but what he didn't know.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
”I didn’t snarl at you,” Bazi snapped back, instantly unravelling her efforts to remain calm herself. She had sneered, certainly, but not snarled, and the expression on her face now was twice as surly as that brief twitch of the lip. ”You aren’t the only one permitted to have a facial expression. And I am listening. I just don’t believe that Fox would have booted you out if you told her what Ferdie did and ask that she pass judgment. On him. Or did you try and take some part of the blame for his behaviour when it quite obviously wasn’t your fault? You were the hero in that situation, and I do not understand what you said to her that would convince her that you needed to go as well. Did you defend him? Did you do that?”
To say he looked vexed was an understatement. Wonder if he’ll fly off the handle, she thought sourly, but stood by her words. The ill-fated wraith could automatically win every argument to save raising the temperature.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
Jace stared at her and closed his eyes tight to stop the onslaught of madness that threatened to slip through the tendrils. This was a true taste of his virtues and she was fast causing him to rethink them. He hadn't realized he was mad at her too until now and he was trying to stay calm though it was not working very well. He opened them again and spoke quietly with ice edging his words. You want to know the conversation do you, Fine! She asked us who did this to us ferdie told her we did it to each other I agreed though I told her there was reason behind it. She basically said she didn't care told us to finish each other off since we were so angry we had fought. I corrected her told her I was defending myself, and that Iwould not kill someone for no good reason. I told her exactly what happened Bazi exactly though I kept Sky and Nightingale's names out o fit I didn't wish to draw them into it. I did mention that Ferdie was not in his right mind and he wasn't it was the truth, but that was all I did not defend him i defended my actions and you know what she told me, your precious leader Bazi? She told me to get out anyway told me to leave and then she chased us to the borders. So you take from it what you will.
He backed up and stood a little bit further away the close proximity making him ill. She was not going to believe him and she was not goign to find fault with Fox so he really didn't know why he even tried. He sighed no that wasn't true he knew why he tried. He loved her as his friend his best friend and he didn't want to lose her, but he probably would anyway, because she was close minded when it came to Fox had been since she became Beta.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
I weep for these guys!
Bazi could feel her teeth squeal under the pressure of her clenched jaws. Fox saw much of the world in black and white, and her Beta guessed that Jace's failure to distance himself dramatically from Ferdie had landed him on the wrong side of that ruthless divide - and perhaps unfairly. But the Swiftcurrent ghost had picked her side now. She had openly pledged her allegiance to Fox and fed slanderous lies about the exiled males to whoever deigned to receive. No doubt her words at the meeting had contributed to Njal washing his paws of the pair.
Given hindsight, that unthinking decision so support Fox filled her with a hollow, all-consuming hopelessness. The older, wiser wolves had spoken up for Jace, but Fox had shot them both down with what Bazi had thought to be a reasonable argument at the time. But had it been right? Tears pricked the girl's eyes and she struggled hard to maintain the venom in her stare. It melted away with every gulped breath.
"I miss you," she eventually croaked. There was nothing else to say. If she tried to reason with Fox, there was a chance - a strong chance - that she would be turfed out too.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
AHh if i'm not careful she'll worm her way into his heart and then he'll be heartbroken and jaded lol and I do too it makes me sad :(
Jace was alarmed immediately at the sadness in Bazi's gaze and he took a deep breath. He didn't know what to do, he could comfort her, but if anyone anyone saw him doing so and told Fox she could be on the receiving end of a very bad day. However, she was also his very good friend and he just couldn't let her sit there and cry.
He strode forward all sinew and black and licked her muzzle and nudged her shoulder Please don't cry Bazi it's okay. I miss you too I really do. You were my best friend you know. Sighing he laid his head on her brow for a moment trying to keep his own composure as the anger all melted away and he was merely left with a bitter taste in his mouth of what had been and what was now. It was a terrible situation they had themselves in and all because of his morals and his ethics that he had been taught. He wished for a moment that he had never came here to this place if he had just stayed in his own home, but then he would not have met those that meant the most to him now. He moved his head then to look down at her wondering where they went now. Could they continue as friends or was there far too much between their two very different worlds to continue on as friends.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
Neither of us have mentioned the SC invasion of SS, so shall we assume this happens before? Since we don't know what the outcome of that will be.
Floods blurred her vision by the time Jace stepped forward. The anger seemed to have evaporated, and Bazi tried in vain to stifle sniffles and sobs against his shoulder. Had she had the presence of mind to check, she would have seen that it was healing well.
"I don't know," she wailed, turning her head away from his questioning eyes to wipe the freely flowing tears against the inside of her front leg. The spot was turning a faint yellow from use. The weeping girl kept her face averted, gulping back sobs and guilt. She had done her part to soil Jace's name, but more so his alpha's. "I love the Creek. It's home. And I will not join Ferdie, " this was said savagely, with a healthy measure of venom, "If it hadn't been for him, you would still be at the Creek." She sniffed and huffed, and eventually grew still, leaning her weight against him though both eyes were fixed on the elsewhere and beyond.
"Njal defended you. And Tuwawi," she murmured. ".. I didn't. I thought.. I-.. I thought you.." Embarrassed, she stepped away from him, ears flat with the weight of shame and eyes fixed on the ground. "I thought you'd picked Ferdie."
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
yes that's fine with me
Jace studied her and spoke quietly I wouldn't ask you to leave your creek Bazi. I know it is important to you I know it is family. It was mine once to remember. I would never expect you to choose your loyalties, I am content to be on the outskirts as long as you don't hate me I'm good with that. And he was He would defend his home and he wouldn't let her pass the borders just as he wouldn't let anyone else pass, but he could surely meet her in neutral ground then and again.
He froze at her next words and it felt like ice was in his veins. Njal had stuck up for him, and he had spoken to him so callously just the other day. However, Njal may have spoken up for him, that did not change the fact that Njal still thought he should have been punished for disobeying .He shook his head to dispel the thoughts threatening to take over his mind.
Jace felt her move and watched her shift his shoulder then felt cold and empty, but he studied her. He spoke quietly There is nothing wrong with that conclusion. I can see how you would think I chose to follow Ferdie rather than Fox if you weren't there to see how it happened. And in a way I guess you could almost argue that Idid choose to follow ferdie rather than Fox when I didn't kill him. he shrugged not realizing what she meant. He merely thought she meant that he had followed ferdie as a leader and a friend nothing more.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 16, 2014
Bazi did not clarify what she meant by 'chosen'. She liked his logic - that he had de facto chosen Ferdie by disobeying a direct order. It made her right, in part, but she did not share that either; it was a silent victory, and one that he could not dispute if it was not shared out loud.
After a few more rubs against an increasingly dirty inner leg, Bazi righted herself and cleared her throat. "Do you like being in a pack with him?" she asked, free of tears now and speaking clearly again. "He isn't right in the head. I know he isn't." She didn't really know why she was bringing it up; Jace couldn't abandon ship and crawl back to the Creek. Fox would never allow it.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 16, 2014
Jace gave her more space after she cleared her face of tears and snot. He still was awkward around others, unsure what they wanted and needed touch wise from him. He sat to his haunches head and shoulders above Bazi still and he spoke quietly I have no choice Bazi now do I? and to answer you no I do not mind and he is not sick anymore. He is perfectly fine now. He is eating, he is well groomed again and he is a good leader. Granted he still suffers from the same issues that I have, but you wouldn't be able to tell anymore from outward appearances. He is even learning to fish. I think that Fox was just not kind to Ferdie and it is what was the straw that broke his back so to speak. I do not deign to know much from his past I do not know what has made him the way he is, but as a leader he has grown into his own.
Jace shrugged there was not really much more to tell. He had fought and lost and he had been homeless for a few days, but he was fine now. He bent to lick at the scab that was over his shoulder gently brushing teeth across it to scratch the itch that burned there.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 19, 2014
Bazi sniffled loudly. Not kind? She supposed that Fox was easily misunderstood - if you had absolutely no skin on your nose. She was a no-nonsense girl, and Ferdie was ... soft. A sensitive soul. A kind wolf, she thought, feeling the brief warmth of a pleasant memory - Ferdie grooming everything in sight, Ferdie asleep in their shared den.
But she didn't trust him now. He had concealed whatever ailed him, and if he was a good leader now, that did not make up for it.
"I don't trust him," Bazi murmured, frowning hard at the words. "I just don't trust him. He didn't.. say anything. Do you know what happened? Why he went crazy? I have been wondering about it, and.. he told me that he'd been an Alpha before. Remember that story he told us, when you tried to get him to fish? I wonder if that was him, in the story, that got his heart broken by a cruel queen. I wonder if that cut him so deep that he isn't.. in control of himself when he feels hurt." Her eyes strayed back to Jace's dark face. A grim expression settled on her girlish features. "And you can't go through life expecting not to get your feelings hurt."
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 19, 2014
Jace's ears pricked forward as he lifted his head from fighting with the scab that he bore. He laid his ears back at her question, he did not like to revisit that night if he could help it, it was by far the worst night of his young life with the hurting of his sister a very close second. At least when he had accidentally hurt his sister his parents hadn't ostracized him and kicked him to the curb.
Jace shook his head I don't know why he had be deteriorating, but the night that he tried to attack Sky was a bad one. I don't know what was going on, but I found him sitting near where Bones was taken and he was different....darker....angrier....and i was trying to talk to him and I told Sky to leave him be and I would have been able to calm him down, but then she touched him and that was the end of it, so I fought with him. He shrugged he didn't know 100 percent why Ferdie had been so depressed he thought it had something to do with Fox, but it could have been a number of things really. He had never asked, maybe he should.
Jace chuckled even though it wasn't all that funny he found irony in her words. yes Bazi you are right you cannot expect that at all.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 24, 2014
And the rest is history, Bazi though, eyeing Jace sadly whilst he recounted the events of that night. Without the drama of the moment, the whole thing seemed so petty. Eject Ferdie, sure; that wolf had a screw loose - but why Jace? Fox's decision to throw both males out made less and less sense the more Bazi dwelled on it, and it was weighing down her lofty opinion of the Creek's alpha.
"Be careful around him," she said into the void that followed Jace's words. Poison leaked into her voice when she added: "Who knows what will happen if he is spurned again." She had seen the way Ferdie had sloped off when the Creek had greeted Scimitar, as if Fox's interest in the burly warrior had been an insult. The girl's gaze wandered in the direction of the Creek, then back to Jace's sky blue eyes. "I should go," she said, fidgeting where she sat.
RE: the knife's edge - Jace - June 24, 2014
Thanks for the thread. Hope we can have another soon ;D
Jace listened to her and gave her a soft sad smile. I will Bazi I promise, but I can hold my own. If he hadn't submitted that night, I would have killed him. It was the fact of the matter really, Ferdie was so close to death that night, as was Jace. It could have gone either way, truthfully, but why bother Bazi with that sad fact.
Jace saw her fidget and he leaned forward and gave her a soft lick across the muzzle. Good bye Bazi. Then with that he turned his large body back towards the mountain and began to lope off, happy to have made peace with a friend.
RE: the knife's edge - Bazi - June 24, 2014
Bazi watched him for a long time, until the warm, wet kiss felt cold and damp on her muzzle. Jace became a dark speck, and then he was gone, swallowed by the dark rock that connected the Sunspire to the rest of the mountain range. Only then did she turn for home, the recently strong urge to quest beyond the flat-lands all but extinguished.