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+--- Thread: Stone Circle I lift up my head and the world is on fire (/showthread.php?tid=27995)
I lift up my head and the world is on fire - Illecebra - June 24, 2018
"What spell have you put on me?" she heard herself asked, hushed and frightened but intrigued. "Guess it's ma super good looks?" a familiar voice though unstrained by trauma and pain retorted. She felt her heart racing and then there was a touch. She brushed her muzzle along his fur and he crooned her name, the sensation it brought her a pleasing one so strong it nearly made her ill.
"Mawk..." She murmured in her sleep, jolting awake as the sound of a twig falling woke her up. Her heartbeat raced and she went over the dream, the memory, the first time she'd met her husband. The sickening thrill of first attraction ran through her and she sniffed herself, embarrassed to find the scent of arousal in the air. "Shit" she groaned and stood up, walking away before someone could find her. It wasn't heat season but the scent was surprisingly strong still, it would bring others close.
RE: I lift up my head and the world is on fire - Mawk - June 24, 2018
He'd been meandering at first. After swiftly returning a rabbit to a cache within Easthollow, he'd found that he had very little to do, aside from patrolling and marking the borders yet again. Not that he disliked it, of course, in truth he found it a relatively peaceful task, but his mind was set on other things this time. Illecebra.
She didn't often leave his mind, that much was true. But lately, even more so. It was as if the idea that she was gaining a few memories here and there had relighted the spark of hope he'd felt in his chest, the flicker of assurance that told him: she remembers you. And he couldn't stop wondering, hoping, that maybe she did. Or, at the very least, would, given time. He wanted her to understand the extent of his feelings toward her, and the feelings she'd felt toward him. It was a bond that somebody else had tried to snap, but one that he believed was fixing itself with every day that passed.
Mawk caught scent of his wife on the wind, and it was one that drew him in with little resistance. Her scent... he knew others could potentially come along, but he didn't want that. She was his mate, and sometimes he just wanted her to himself. That wasn't selfish, it was just love. He loved her, and as her mate he felt it right that he follow the scent to the one who held it.
"Cebra," He chuffed deeply, glad to see her.
She didn't often leave his mind, that much was true. But lately, even more so. It was as if the idea that she was gaining a few memories here and there had relighted the spark of hope he'd felt in his chest, the flicker of assurance that told him: she remembers you. And he couldn't stop wondering, hoping, that maybe she did. Or, at the very least, would, given time. He wanted her to understand the extent of his feelings toward her, and the feelings she'd felt toward him. It was a bond that somebody else had tried to snap, but one that he believed was fixing itself with every day that passed.
Mawk caught scent of his wife on the wind, and it was one that drew him in with little resistance. Her scent... he knew others could potentially come along, but he didn't want that. She was his mate, and sometimes he just wanted her to himself. That wasn't selfish, it was just love. He loved her, and as her mate he felt it right that he follow the scent to the one who held it.
"Cebra," He chuffed deeply, glad to see her.
RE: I lift up my head and the world is on fire - Illecebra - June 24, 2018
She gasped at the sudden voice from behind her, pausing and wincing at the mixture of joy and disappointment. Who else had she expected to come to her scent? Howl? She cringed at the thought, guilt surging up and turned around looking almost like a pup caught doing something they knew they shouldn't.
Upon seeing him with the memory fresh in her mind she released a shaky breath. He did have super- good looks and he was all hers...so why was she conflicted? The surge of intrigue and affection felt in the memory was renewed and despite the turmoil inside she slowly walked forward, leaning in and breathing words she hoped he remembered too "What spell have you put on me?"
RE: I lift up my head and the world is on fire - Mawk - June 29, 2018
He frowned a little as what appeared to be guilt shone in his love's eyes when she turned to face him, but he did not question it. He had full faith that if she needed to speak to him about something, she'd do it, right? He was always willing to listen to anything she needed to talk about, that was a promise he'd made from the very beginning.
He'd been prepared to embrace her but she made the first move, which almost surprised him. This was good - if he thought back to the state she was in when he and Howl found her, well, it was clear to see that her confidence was returning. His lips curled up in a slight smile, fiery gaze glittering as she approached. The words she breathed had his own catch in his throat, muzzle parting slightly as the memory flashed to the front of his mind. What spell have you put on me?
Sporting a little grin, Mawk replied in the best immitation of his past accent, "Guess it's ma super good looks?"
He'd been prepared to embrace her but she made the first move, which almost surprised him. This was good - if he thought back to the state she was in when he and Howl found her, well, it was clear to see that her confidence was returning. His lips curled up in a slight smile, fiery gaze glittering as she approached. The words she breathed had his own catch in his throat, muzzle parting slightly as the memory flashed to the front of his mind. What spell have you put on me?
Sporting a little grin, Mawk replied in the best immitation of his past accent, "Guess it's ma super good looks?"
RE: I lift up my head and the world is on fire - Illecebra - June 29, 2018
When he spoke the next line she smiled and gave his ear a quick lick before nuzzling him, for the first time a genuine sense of warmth and home surfacing at their closeness. But with it came a sense of wrong and Howl flashed through her mind and the guilt came back, causing her to step back. Her tail fell and dropped between her legs, a sad expression ruining her beautiful face. He deserved to know now, she couldn't bring him anymore hope without first telling what she had done. "Mawk I ..." she faltered and whined, hunching down as her submissiveness came back. What if he got angry and yelled, or worse went after Howl?
She swallowed thickly and turned away, squinting her eyes as she blurted it out "With my memories gone I couldn't remember you. That also means i didn't remember our love .I couldn't love a stranger mate or not. And with everything happening I felt weird about us...so I got close to Howl. I became friends and i trusted him just as much as you but...i also loved him. I do love him. We um...I kissed him." she admitted it all and fell silent, head hanging in shame.
RE: I lift up my head and the world is on fire - Mawk - June 30, 2018
He smiled warmly at the nuzzle, returning the gesture before halting as his love took a step back. Something was wrong. He'd thought there was from the moment she turned. His smile was replaced with a sad frown, amber gaze staring lovingly at the woman before him, waiting as she prepared to speak, though when her submission returned he crouched low as well, wanting to give her the comfort she needed to confess whatever it was she needed to. She opened her muzzle...
And then his whole world shattered into a billion little pieces.
He didn't scream. He didn't yell. He didn't run away. He just stood there, face dropped with shock and expression holding the pain of a thousand dying soldiers, lost to reality and out of touch with everything. His eyes had lost their fiery spark, remaining dull in their sockets, tail droopy at his hind - she loved Howl. Not him, Howl. His heart cracked down the middle, ripped apart as the words circled like ghosts in his head, the taste of ashes upon his tongue and knives plunged straight into his chest. "I kissed him."
"I couldn't love a stranger mate or not."
He couldn't speak. It was as though in that one confession, he had died. He didn't feel anything but a deep sorrow, a swirling storm of hurt that wouldn't lift, and a deep wound of betrayal that he'd never before felt. It felt in that moment that he'd been hit by a million bullets, all shooting into his body and leaving him weak, bleeding, on the ground. His legs shook. Despite all they'd been through, despite the joy of seeing Illecebra's memories returning, she'd still gone to Howl. And that hurt more than anything he had ever experienced in his life.
"I..." But the words caught in his throat, like he was drowning and the water had enveloped his lungs. He couldn't speak, only stand there as helpless as a newborn while his life crumbled down into nothing, because she was his everything. And she had wanted somebody else.
And then his whole world shattered into a billion little pieces.
He didn't scream. He didn't yell. He didn't run away. He just stood there, face dropped with shock and expression holding the pain of a thousand dying soldiers, lost to reality and out of touch with everything. His eyes had lost their fiery spark, remaining dull in their sockets, tail droopy at his hind - she loved Howl. Not him, Howl. His heart cracked down the middle, ripped apart as the words circled like ghosts in his head, the taste of ashes upon his tongue and knives plunged straight into his chest. "I kissed him."
"I couldn't love a stranger mate or not."
He couldn't speak. It was as though in that one confession, he had died. He didn't feel anything but a deep sorrow, a swirling storm of hurt that wouldn't lift, and a deep wound of betrayal that he'd never before felt. It felt in that moment that he'd been hit by a million bullets, all shooting into his body and leaving him weak, bleeding, on the ground. His legs shook. Despite all they'd been through, despite the joy of seeing Illecebra's memories returning, she'd still gone to Howl. And that hurt more than anything he had ever experienced in his life.
"I..." But the words caught in his throat, like he was drowning and the water had enveloped his lungs. He couldn't speak, only stand there as helpless as a newborn while his life crumbled down into nothing, because she was his everything. And she had wanted somebody else.
RE: I lift up my head and the world is on fire - Illecebra - June 30, 2018
It was the moment that the face she remembered loving so much in her dreams fell that she too felt her heart shatter into a million pieces. The love she had begun to feel for him made this so much worse, her breath slowly rushing out at the anguish on his face. The fiery glint in his eyes that even now she loved about him vanished all at once until his eyes were void of anything but loss and sorrow and she began to Cry .
She hung her head and the tears soaked the dry terrain, soaking into some newly sprouting plants watering them with her sorrow. "I...I didn't have any memories then, not of you or the children. It had been weeks of waiting and trying, I had given up. Immediately after I began to remember. I do feel for you now" she paused and then gave a bitter laugh, eyes opening and blank with guilt and self hatred "That's too late though isn't it? Now I remember just enough to start loving you but I still love him and I kissed him when he isn't my mate." she felt more tears drip to the earth. She blew out some air and stood up, beginning to slowly back away. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen and now...now everything is just a mess and you don't deserve this, I'm sorry Mawk" she whispered, looking ready to bolt.