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+--- Thread: Sun Mote Copse Blow the wind southerly. (/showthread.php?tid=38938)
Blow the wind southerly. - Towhee - January 19, 2020
It was getting late and the cold was boring into her bones, yet still Towhee traipsed persistently around the copse's fringes, determined to complete the circuit before she turned in for the night. Her mind was already wandering in the direction of her warm bed, her eyes growing heavy, when movement caused her to snap to attention. Wide awake again, she squinted through the darkness, her mouth falling open when a figure materialized from the night and took on familiar features.
"Crow?" she blurted incredulously, standing stock still as he approached, ignoring her disbelief and posing a question that took her aback. Five minutes later, they stared at each other in pensive silence and all Towhee could think to say was, "I'll tell them the news but you should say 'hi' to your parents, brother and sister while you're here."
But he only shook his head, said a quick, "Gotta get back," and then melted back into the night. Towhee took a single step forward, as if about to give pursuit, but then she stilled and let out a long sigh as she replayed their conversation in her mind. "Towhee, is Sugar here?" "What? No, why? She's supposed to be—" "She disappeared the day after she arrived and nobody's seen her since." Her heart sank into her belly as she gazed out into the dark, familiar words whispering through her mind: Whose blood?
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - RIP Niamh - January 21, 2020
She'd begun to feel some sort of feeling creeping up along her spine, but had barred the possibility that anything would happen so soon. Naturally, as in true Niamh fashion, she had mostly secluded herself while she was deep in thought, though she did see her daughter every day. Eventually, she lost grasp of the spite she'd had when Nellie had admitted that she'd purposefully decided not to let anyone run a message from the Frosthawks so that she knew her daughter was alive...But she knew that Nellie was a child yet, and couldn't really be held accountable. She did blame those who had ventured out that way- and had begun to seriously question Phox's motives. Was he suddenly more devoted to her daughter and keeping his word to her, than he was with a wolf who he'd basically proposed to?
Needless to say, she meandered along the borders with the same, dogged purpose that always took her along that route, haing passed by Bronco once already. Unusually for him, his spirits were high. He had gone on a scouting mission to take Sugar Glider to the Frosthawks and had returned unscacthed. His sister was back, as well, which perked him up. Maybe he was finally moving out of the brooding teenager phase- it was hard to say why, exactly, but Niamh wouldn't question it. If her son was happy, she'd let him stay that way.
When she spotted Towhee, she picked up a whiff of Crow's scent as well, though she didn't se the young one in the area. Crow too, was with the Frosthawks, as far as Niamh know, and perhaps he'd only come with a message. It was too dark to see very far, but the light colour and even the orangey colours on Towhee's sides marked her out against the flat darkness that seemed to fall every night within the copse, whether or not the moon was out.
-Hay,- She signed when she got close enough that she figured her friend would make out the movement. There was an air of concern about Towhee that made Niamh cock her head to the side. -What gives?-
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - Towhee - January 22, 2020
When Towhee spotted someone moving toward her from within the territory, she initially thought it was Pippin. Ah, nope, she realized her error when her orange eyes focused on Niamh's feminine features. Her friend signed at her and Towhee glanced in the direction Crow had gone, brow furrowing before she faced Niamh once more.
"Sugar went to train with Raven but evidently disappeared the day after she arrived," Towhee explained. "That was Crow," she added, features twisting in consternation. "He said Rave gave Sugar some homework and she seemed all about it. She's not the type to just bail either. She must've gotten lost again." She sighed, sagging as if under the weight. "I really wish people would stop doing that." And though she didn't say it out loud, Towhee thought to herself that she wasn't going to waste any more time searching for those lost, much as she wanted to find them. It was such a waste of time and energy.
"But," the mercenary said in the next breath, motioning for Niamh to join her on her walk back into the copse and her waiting bed, "I don't want to think about this shit. You know what I'd rather think about?" She barely paused, eyes skimming the side of Niamh's face as a smile twitched her lips. "You and my brother, eh?"
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - RIP Niamh - January 22, 2020
Niamh's ears flattened the moment Towhe admitted that Sugar had disappeared. Having had one of her own children disappear- which was still a very sore point- she could relate, and wondered if something else had happened with the young, dark-eyed girl. Bronco had mentioned something to her, that Sugar had seemed a bit 'off' but pressing the boy into giving out more information had been like trying to squeeze blood from a stone so she'd left him alone. At least Sugar had been given a task, and Niamh was content to put some hope in the stock that perhaps Sugar was simply out doing what was asked of her. "Maybe she's just taking a bit longer than expected to get her tasks done. If she goes missing for too long, either I'll go or I'll send Bronco." She said. At least then, the Frosthawks couldn't hold more information from them...And part of her was still ready to give Quixote a good smack for not telling her that he'd been harbouring her daughter this whole time.
She followed as Towhee moved, inadvertantly taking perhaps just a scond too long to fall into step, and in the process of falling behind, caught a glimpse of dark fur matted, covering a healing posterior. She quickly hastened her pace, and the topic of her and Phox- which did cause enough of an effect to make her cringe inwardly, she furrowed her brow and darkened her expression. "Forget that- who did what to your downstairs?!" She demanded. "Wasn't checkin' you out, but jeez, Towhee," She said, sidestepping the awkward topic of Phox, in favour of the slightly more topic of Towhee's torn lady-bits, "Who, what, and why?"
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - Towhee - January 22, 2020
Niamh made a valid point, which Towhee hated to counter, but her lips twisted as she explained, "She's been gone for over two weeks, according to Crow." That was even longer than her disappearing act during the foray to the coast. She swallowed thickly, still feeling the remnants of guilt about that. "I don't think either one of you should go," she added a little reluctantly, feeling even more like an ass. "I get it. I want to find her too. But wandering the wilds, it's..." It was an exercise in futility, honestly, and that was the hard truth.
Her friend surprised her by broaching another topic entirely: her butthurt (I couldn't help myself). "What?" she blurted, caught off guard. "Not checking me out, my ass," she retorted, then started laughing at her own pun, the sound similar to a braying donkey. "It's a rug burn from all the dicking," she fibbed with a forced casual shrug.
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - RIP Niamh - January 22, 2020
"Two weeks?" Niamh echoed, concern lacing its way into her voice. She pursed her lips together when Towhee tried to dissuade her from going, but she shook her head. Towhee was right- it was dangerous, especially this time of year, and Niamh knew that she couldn't very well go out on a trip on her own- not until she knew that her own approaching streak was begun and over. She couldn't send Bronco out because he, like Sugar, was still too young to be off on his own, wasn't he? It'd break his heart to know that his best friend was missing. "I'll...I'll have to tell him at some point. It's better that he knows sooner rather than later," She said ruefully. Though the truth would hurt him- Niamh was far from keeping secrets from her son. And while she had no idea whether Sugar was dead or alive, she could at least let him know that she was missing. Any information was better than no information- and yes, she was still holding a grudge against Phox. But those emotions were likely hidden by the reluctance she had, as well, to tell her son that his best friend had gone missing.
But Towhee's change in topic, and the deftness with which she seemed to go from talking about a lost family member to the dismemberment of her behind did seem to lighten things up a bit. "Well," Niamh shrugged, half-admitting that she would, on any normal day, not shy away from checking her friend out because heck- though Towhee wasn't perhaps the most feminine wolf, Niamh did like the look of wolves who were tough and strong, and found those qualities attractive even in a female like Towhee. But in a platonic way. As soon as she admitted that it was from a promiscuous streak, Niamh lifted her head and raised an eyebrow for a moment, biting her lip and allowing her snaggletooth to show as she puzzled together an answer- before she had it.
"I knew it!" She exclaimed. "It's that blonde guy, Pippin, right?" She asked, not waiting for an answer. "Totally called it," She said, though not without a tinge of envy. Pippin was a pretty-looking fellow. "I'm right, though, aren't I?" She finally asked again, eventually giving Towhee enough time to form an answer, before her expression fell. "But...Jeez, Towhee, I mean, like....Jeez," She said, both trying to- and trying not to- picture Towhee's wounded lady-bits. "Like...I mean, Colt and I...We did it a lot....But it never like..." She made a motion, as though to describe some sort of tearing, but found herself falling short of being able to describe things well enough. "You sure he like...Was doing it right?" She asked, but rehgardless of her answer, she still felt sure that amount of injury couldn't have come from sex. She gestured with a flick of her muzzle.
"C'mon. I seen your downstairs before. Turn around an' lemme have a look," She said, in that tone a best friend would use when entering a changing room without asking permission.
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - Towhee - January 22, 2020
The words and gestures her friend made caused Towhee to laugh again, despite the somber news from a few minutes ago. She let Niamh finish before she deigned to reply with a blasé, "I like it rough," and another shrug. She then snorted loudly at her fellow tradesman's request. "Those are for Pippin's eyes only," she joked, pausing for emphasis before adding, "and Kaertok's... and that other guy's... and Rye's... and that other guy's... and that other guy's... ooooops?"
She wouldn't normally have minded Niamh's inspection overly much, though Towhee really didn't want her friend getting a good look and recognizing what was unmistakably a bite mark. So, instead, she suddenly shoved playfully against the blonde's shoulder. "Don't try to change the subject. We were discussing how you and Phox are going to make all the babies, hopefully enough that I can borrow a couple, seeing as—" Abruptly, she realized she'd never told Niamh about her suspected infertility.
"I don't think I've had a chance to tell you," she continued after a peculiar pause, "that I don't think I can have kids, I mean. That's why I fuck around so irresponsibly. Although, just lately, I've been really hoping I'm wrong." There was none of her normal sadness as she conveyed this information, more of a controlled but nonetheless naked hope in her orange eyes.
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - RIP Niamh - January 22, 2020
Niamh's concern for Towhee was real- and she did not believe that the injuries sustained to her private parts were simply from sex, no matter how rough, but Towhee insisted on keeping her trap shut- and side-stepping by listing a bunch of names, so Niamh sighed, gave Towhee a somewhat disapproving look and shook her head. "Fiiiiiiiiiine," She said. "But jeez, Towhee, leave some for the rest of us- and I don't want 'em with half a dick 'cause they cracked the other half off doin' your rough stuff," She smirked.
Towhee brought the topic of Phox back to the forefront, which caused Niamh to stiffen slightly, as she wasn't entirely sure how or what to say to Towhee, given the fact that she had an issue she wanted to discuss with him first, and she didn't exactly want to rile Towhee up before she had a chance to see exactly why it was Phox had made the decision he'd made. Fortunately for all involved, the topic moved on- to the idea that Towhee might not be able to have pups.
Her promiscuity, it seemed, stemmed from the hope that she might be able to have kids. Niamh had not forgotten, per say, that Towhee had grown what Raven had thought were testicles, but she had not given the topic much thought as it had impacted her iew of Towhee so very little. As expressed earlier, Niamh really didn't spend a lot of time contemplating Towhee's hind end, and though she was concerned by Towhee's unusual growths, she hadn't really thought that it meant, one hundred percent, that she could not conceive kids.
She could sense both Towhee's hurt and her hope, so Niamh scooted a bit closer, and touched her nose to her friend's cheek. "But you wanna have kids," She said, gently filling in what she was perceiving from Towhee's implied language. "You've raised Fennec an' Figment...You're their mom too...But you wanna have kids of your own, don't you?" She asked. Niamh assumed she was right- given the fact that Towhee had already admitted that even if Niamh and Phox had kids, she'd want to steal them. She pressed her forehead against Towhee's cheek for a moment, and felt bad, knowing that she'd been lucky enough to have that experience- but regretted that Towhee hadn't, and possibly couldn't. She pulled back, and shrugged. "Did Raven ever tell you like...For sure for sure that you couldn't have kids?" She asked, tentatively- knowing it was a sensitive subject, but wanting to get more answers so she could better understand what Towhee was going through.
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - Towhee - January 22, 2020
She smiled gently at the touch to her cheek, then withdrew so she could read Niamh's lips more effectively. "Yeah," she agreed, "yes, I want kids. Fig and Fen are my own but I want the experience of, you know, carrying them." Towhee almost said she wanted to experience the miracle of childbirth but, honestly, that would be a lie. It sounded horrible. Worth it. But still not the highlight, by any stretch of the imagination. "And, I mean, two is great but I want more," just like many parents did.
"I never talked to Rave about this," Towhee said in the next beat. It wasn't technically the truth but the one time she'd let slip, her sister hadn't heard her, and she had never brought it up again. She'd held it close to the vest for a long time, really, while she took the time to assess her own cryptic feelings about it all. Only when achieving clarity recently had she finally opened up about it. "I'm going by the fact that I went into heat last year, banged a bunch'a dudes, and nothing happened. But Aunt Finley said, 'never say never,' so... is it bad that I'm hoping one of these randos knocked me up?" Okay, Pippin wasn't exactly random, plus he was the most likely father just by the numbers. Still, Towhee didn't think about her potential offspring as belonging to anyone but her.
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - RIP Niamh - January 22, 2020
At the mention of wanting the experience, Niamh puffed up her cheeks with air, as though there was a rush of words begging to be released- but she kept her trap shut. It would've been terribly unfair of her to reassure Towhee that being pregnant was horrible and that childbirth was painful if that was what Towhee wanted, and especially if it was something she deserved but physically could not do. Even with all the pain, there was still a sort of magic that came from conceiving, carrying and producing children, and she didn't feel right trying to dissuade her friend, or to dismiss her dreams and hopes. She could have made a joke about the association between Towhee's preference for rough sex and the pain of childbirth- but that wasn't very tactful either. For some reason, as close-minded and selfish as Niamh could be with others, Towhee opened up a more genuine, sensitive side of her.
"An' I want you to have them, lots of 'em." Niamh said. She didn't want to think that Towhee couldn't have her own children, because she didn't want Towhee to be limited by anything. She too felt hopeful that if Raven hadn't diagnosed her as being infertile, then maybe it wasn't entirely the case. Towhee hadn't conceived any children the year before, but Niamh hadn't exactly been around while Towhee had been off galavanting with men that time of year either. This being the case, and with her escapades being fruitless, Towhee'd been led to believe that she couldn't conceive. This year, she had done the same, in hopes that perhaps one of the males she'd coupled with thus far had done the trick. "I don't think so," Niamh answered positively. "I mean...I kinda hope if one of them does th trick, then it was Pippin, 'cause then your kids'll prossibly turn out lookin' like me, but...I dunno. I don't think that's a bad thing. I want that for you, Towhee. If you want kids, then I want you to have kids." She said. "An' I don't think anyone else in the pack is gonna have kids, so...If you do find out you're preggo, I'll have your back, in case Wraen gets all stuffy about illegitimmmmitate or whatever you call 'em...Kids." She said.
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - Towhee - January 22, 2020
Niamh offered her support and Towhee smiled appreciatively. "Thanks, Niamh," she burred. "I don't think Wraen would take issue," she thought aloud, recollecting the Sovereign's earlier blessing, although that had taken place before the woman had attacked her. "I dunno. I probably don't have to worry about this but it'd be a good problem to have, honestly."
They were nearing the rendezvous site and, specifically, the place where Towhee kept house with Phox and the kids. As they approached, Towhee almost made a joke about Niamh joining them but then another thought entirely struck her. She stopped in her tracks.
"Before I head to bed, I ought to find Uncle @Elwood and Aunt @Finley and let them know about Sugar." She paused, face contorting. "I'm going to have to tell them their missing son came by and couldn't be bothered to stick around too. Ugh." Sigh. "Catch you later...?" And they would talk about the ship then.
RE: Blow the wind southerly. - RIP Niamh - January 23, 2020
While Niamh liked Wraen well enough, she still felt slightly worried that Wraen might not like an unexpected pregnancy. But Towhee was a dependable wolf, who had invested everything she had into the welfare of the pack- she was a faithful guardian, and dutiful tutor of the youth, and in Niamh's views, every bit a potential leader of the pack, should Wraen ever choose to have another wolf join in the leadership team. Regardless of what the outcome would be, she'd meant what she said, and if Wraen showed any sort of disapproval toward Towhee's pregnancy, she'd be met with Niamh's ire. Towhee wanted kids- and deserved them, and she had a strong enough family team to help her raise them.
"Well, I know there's not much I can do...An' I dunno if you want me to be like...Asking questions about how you feel, and lookin' for the earliest signs, an' all outwardly hopeful about it, or if you just want space, but whatever you want, and whatever I can do, I'm there, an' I'll do it." She said. Maybe Towhee didn't want to get her hopes up, in case she didn't start showing signs of pregnancy within the next month or so- or maybe she did. Niamh liked to believe that in a perfect world, Towhee wouldn't have to worry about that possibility, and could instead look forward to that being a probability, but this wasn't a perfect world. She didn't want to raise hopes in case things didn't go the way Towhee wanted them to. She shrugged. "But I do hope you got knocked up. And with like....Five kids. And I'm gonna be the 'cool aunt' to all of them and teach them all my bad habits." She assured Towhee.
Towhee had made it plainly clear that she wanted to have her own biological children, so Niamh felt it wouldn't be right to simply offer surrogacy. Towhee had children who had been mothered by another wolf, and she loved them as much as she could ever love her own children. But she had expressed a very precise and assured desire that she wanted to conceive, carry, and birth her own, so Niamh felt that offering surrogacy might not only be offering a flimsy band-aid, but might also imply that she thought it might not be worth Towhee still trying to conceive on her own, and rub salt in a wound. She wasn't quite sure what she ought to do- so she opted to think about it a bit, before considering speaking about it.
Her ears turned back when Towhee mentioned the disappearance of Sugar again, and Niamh nodded. It was never good, bringing bad news to parents, but they needed to know that Sugar wasn't where she was supposed to be. "Break a leg," She said softly, but honestly, knowing that the messages she'd have to deliver were heavy. "And...Yeah, we'll catch up again soon," She promised, before she left Towhee and went off to ponder more on her own.