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+--- Thread: Totoka River this long world like my thoughts (/showthread.php?tid=39993)
this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
set for the 13th. hua is no longer in heat. @Ying
She had returned to the island only temporarily. Had met Greyback, refreshed the borders, filled a few caches, and returned to the shore. Ying's scent had become old; the girl was no where to be found. It was apparent she had been on a trip too. If she didn't know what she'd known, she would've been happy for the girl, thinking she was likely on some kind of blind date with a Moonspear boy.
But she knew. That Ying was out there, creating- what was it? Some kind of army? Not recruiting for Yuèlóng, only recruiting for her secret group. How long had it been going on? She felt sick at the thought of it, that she was likely to be overthrown. Or maybe attacked. Who knew what Ying had in mind, and Huā's paranoia only served to exaggerate those deathly fantasies, keeping her up each night.
Upon returning to the shore, she took a drink from the freezing river. She lifted her maw up to gaze at the forest. She would have to search the lands once again- this time for the genju- and confront her. Still, she had no idea what she would say when she saw her again. How could she say anything? She had argued with her sisters many times, but this was the first that it weighed so heavily on her soul. Not just a difference of opinions- a betrayal.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 07, 2020
Their journey had been surprisingly short. @Fengmian was well-travelled, as they all were, for which Ying was grateful. She nodded him off for a moment —
I'm going to use the restroom.— and walked toward the river, only a short distance from where she'd left him.
She noticed Huā, presumably before being noticed herself. Ying couldn't smell anything on her, autogenous or otherwise. Figuring that her heat had ended, she chuffed to grab her sister's attention.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
Speak of the devil. A chuff grabs her attention- Ying. Her expression was neutral as ever, neither happy nor cold, entirely devoid of emotion. She comes closer to the girl slowly. There were new scents on her- Fengmian? She was curious, if the darker boy was here, but there were other things to discuss first. The boy could wait.
英，She greets coolly,
你的旅行怎么样？
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 07, 2020
Oh? Hua's tone was a source of great interest.
Fine. How were yours?She tilted her head downward, giving her sister a firm once-over.
We might have missed each other, though I've heard we saw similar things.Ying might have slighted their pack, but her sister had slighted their values. Which was more dire?
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
是好的She replies evenly, before adding on with candor,
我们是Neverwinter Forest的盟友。With some humor, she thinks for a moment that their packs had come to a union, and so had the leaders- but her face remains neutral despite her inward amusement.
At Ying's next comment, she nods.
对。我确定你遇到很多人。She comments, secretly a jab at her recruitment. Oh, she'd met many, alright. Huā was sure she was all over the land in recruiting her followers. And Huā had met many, too- but not all were experiences she could share.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 07, 2020
You went to Neverwinter?she asked. Ying took a step forward, her face revealing her inner curiousity.
Did you like Mal? He's nice.The huntress took a seat, silent in her movements. Knowing of her sister's heat and their young alliance, one could only wonder how the agreement was met.
There was a huff in the silence.
I met some. Have you seen Aiolos yet?Assuming he had returned to the island after their spar, that is.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
She nods.
他看起来很好。She agrees quietly, deciding (smartly) to leave out the details of how nice he'd really been to her. When Ying sits, Huā sits beside her, though maintains her posture. To her question of Aiolos, she shakes her head. She was not sure who Ying spoke of (Ruò had not told her anything), but she figured this person must be a friend of Ying's.
Then, thinking of Mal,
你知道，She begins, lighting a match to ignite a little spark,
他跟我说有意思。。。She would wait a moment, silently, before continuing, to give Ying a final chance to admit her guilt.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 07, 2020
Unfortunately, Ying did not feel guilty. She lifted a brow, taunting Hua to speak further. What would come from the Empress's mouth?
I heard something interesting, too.Her eyes looked over Hua's frame, wondering who she had allowed to touch her. It was so unlike the twins to be so careless, to be so bold. Hydra had explained that Hua did not know she was in heat, but what did that matter?
Why don't you go first?
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
I heard something interesting too.
She tried not to tense up at that. What did she know? Did she know that she'd visited Moonspear? Or perhaps she knew that she'd slept with Mal? No- she wouldn't know that much. Mal wouldn't have mentioned it... and even if Ying was holding secret meetings with Hydra, she had only told the girl she'd met with a man. Hydra had no knowledge of whom. But her paranoia had her nervous.
Still, she continued. Her tone a sarcastic glee,
他告诉我你一直很忙! 您现在拥有自己的位置和自己的员工，对吗?She laughs as if it was the funniest thing in the world.
英，傻丫头，从没告诉我你是叛徒！She laughs again, but her eyes were icy as she stared Ying down.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 07, 2020
What?Without realizing, Ying curled her upper lip into a slight snarl. She did not enjoy being scolded, especially when there didn't appear to be a reason.
What are you talking about?Jūnshì didn't cross her mind as a possible cause; it wasn't a separate entity, something that Ying planned to never share. It was her own private project, yes, but nothing to elicit such a reaction.
Had it not been for Hua's insult — fucking traitor — Ying might have been able to keep her cool.
If I'm a traitor, then you're a whore. An incompetent one, too.She would never call her sister such a thing, never! but something in her mind had switched.
You went to the Wilds while in heat, right? How many men did you let touch you? And how many bastards do you think we'll have to take care of, hm?Ying took another step forward, her eyes glassy with ire.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
Her lip curls, and she plays the game of unawares, pissing Huā off more. Her fur stood on ends.
我说的是你背后的军队。She huffs in total irritation. Did Ying think she could get out of this by acting ignorant?
Her fur stood on end as she returns the curl of her black lips once Ying began to speak. So she definitely talked to Hydra, then. It seemed she had a new closest ally. How much had Hydra told her? Did Ying know what she'd done? Still, hyprocritical siren risks it, lying,
我做到了，但是我没有和任何人做爱！ 我不知道那是什么，我以前从未经历过。She exclaims with widened eyes.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 07, 2020
What was Hua thinking? Whatever it was, the woman was mistaken.
I'm not— what?Ying shook her head and took a step back.
It's a jūnshì, for Yuèlóng.She wondered what had led her sister to this conclusion, whether it was someone else's misinformation or Hua's own imagination.
We just talked about this, not even that long ago! I told you I felt uncomfortable because no one knows basic defense, and since you didn't take the initiative, I decided that I would.Educating her people should have been the Empress's priority, but it didn't seem like that was the case.
You still don't trust me.Ying scoffed and turned away, frustrated with this revelation.
You're not...you've changed so much, and you can't even see it. Why would I leave, after telling you that I wouldn't? The whole family is here, Hua. Not everything comes back to you, and what you want.Hua had become a hypocrite, even more blatantly so than before. It was frustrating to watch her loved one die to her own inflated ego.
She snorted her disbelief. Hua surely slept with someone, right? How could she have not? Ying didn't have any proof of these accusations, not yet.
We'll know what you did once you swell up. Guess what? If you're pregnant, it's only a matter of time before everyone knows.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
Her brow furrowed in confusion.
为了Yuelóng？ 但是...如果这是给我们的，为什么还要保密呢？She sighed, hurt entering her voice now. Ying couldn't be telling the truth. Why else wouldn't she have told Huā? It wouldn't have been a big deal- but it became an issue when it was something that she couldn't know about. In her eyes, her second-in-command ought to tell her what sort of things were going on, especially in relation to Huā's own pack.
The last part pierced throught her heart. The empress, becoming a shame to her own community! She was determined that she could not be pregnant. She had not set out to be a mother and she promised herself she would not become one. Men had used her plenty of times in the south without her agreement, and yet she had never gotten pregnant then. What was so different about this heat?
英，你总是调情的人。 你怎么这么残忍?She sighs, eyes pricking though she fought to keep tears from leaking out. Her gaze leaves her sister then.
那如果我做爱怎么办？ 会错吗？Plenty of times in her life that she'd been raped- would it be a terrible thing, to enjoy sex for the first time in her life? To take control of her perception?
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 07, 2020
Frustrated. She was frustrated because again, Hua was questioning her motives.
Why do I have to tell you?she asked,
You don't trust me?Similar to her sister, Ying's tone dropped to something more desperate than accusatory. What did she have to do to earn basic respect? Moreover (and perhaps more importantly), when would the twins learn to trust?
You trust the foreigners more than you trust me.Ying rolled her eyes and kicked at the snow, sending flurries into the air. In some ways, they had switched roles; Ying despised Hua's efforts to corrupt their home, something that was meant to be sacred.
I thought that if I did it on my own, you would respect me more.
I wouldn't just be Ying, the outsider.
Ying frowned.
Regardless of who I sleep with, I know better than to do it when I'm fertile.What was Hua not understanding?
There's nothing wrong with having sex, but timing is important. If you did sleep with someone, or whatever, you could be pregnant. That's more resources to spend that right now, we don't have.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 07, 2020
难道，你不知道你不跟我说，我会很焦急?我和你不一样的，我很偏执狂。She sighs with a shake of her head. Ying's next comment, her kick, and eye-roll all serve to further displease Huā.
那不对。我对你的信任超过了所有人，这就是为什么我如此受伤。。。She looks back to Ying.
无论如何我都会尊重你。
At Ying's final scoldings Huā looks away again. Tears pierced her eyes once more and finally they fell, wetting her charcoal cheeks. She was ashamed to let Ying see her cry; already she figured she appeared weak in morale. This would only serve to destroy any dignity she had left. More about the heat, and fertility, and she wanted to choke. No, no, she couldn't, wouldn't be pregnant. Not by a foreign man.
And yet her parents were no longer there to keep under the control of what cultural norms dictated. But her family was. She knew many of them were still aligned with the values of home- she had thought she was, too- and yet the plague had taken control of her, rearranged her motives and cursed her. What would her aunt say, had she known Huā to do such a thing? How about the other nobleman's children? Or the servants, would they have whispered about it between themselves, laughing in hushed tones? And yet she felt already she could never be a good bride. She had wanted desperately to be one when she was a girl- and she and Mei had practiced it well, behaved with femininity, quiet, and modesty. And then she'd grown up, and been used. And she'd found that she liked women. She would never be the perfect bride, and this mistake sealed the deal.
Heat... why must it plague her?
我真的不知道。对不起。。。Is all she can quietly muster for now.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 08, 2020
They look to you. They will always look to you.
I'm not a traitor.Her eyes slowly lifted.
You have changed since becoming our leader. It is not good for you.There would be no better opportunity for truth than this, and Ying knew that she ought to take it. She stepped forward and settled into a seat.
Keeping you safe has always been my priority. If I see that this is becoming too much, I will not hesitate to move.
If you cannot lead, then I will do it for you.
It was not a threat, but an offer. Ying did not plan to step forward until the situation became dire. Hua could continue leading as she had been, but if it became apparent that she was not ready, her removal would be had without second thought.
She had discussed this with Hydra, and knew that the Queen was in agreement. This coast belonged to her — who else was deserving? — and by proxy, her sisters. The whole family held some claim to this region, but it would only be had at Ying's discretion.
Maybe she had changed, too.
Ying shifted her head forward and furrowed her brow, concerned with her sister's tears.
Don't apologize, she said,
We'll figure it out.Hunters would have to take shifts; they needed to dig more caches, begin filling them to prepare... Even if Hua wasn't pregnant, she was sure that pups would come.
You should find a mate.— It won't look as bad.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 08, 2020
一如既往，欢迎你加入我们，成为皇帝。Huā asserts evenly. Ying was her sister, but if Huā was to be a good empress, she would not allow insubordination to run rampant among her people. Ying had the option to join her as a team- but if the girl tried to remove her from her position, she would see to it that she would be kicked to the curb. She could no longer risk such threat.
Ying was only valuable in that she meant so much to Huā on a familial level. As a hunter or fighter- not so much. They were wolves; hunters and fighters abounded all over the land. It would not be difficult to find more. Perhaps only difficult to find those willing to live on an island- but scour the coast, and it wouldn't take long.
When Ying brings up a mate, Huā's gaze slides uncomfortably away.
一个男孩? 可是。。。But I want Nuka. She frowned, the words were something she could never share with her sister. They could not understand. Mei seemed incapable of attraction, while Ying liked every man in her line of vision. There was no explaining her love of girls to those two. She shakes her head as if clearing her thoughts away.
你认为Hydra可以为我安排一个吗？
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 08, 2020
Mercenaries were a common commodity, but Hua was fooling herself if she thought that any would be as dedicated. Moreover, insubordination wasn't possible while in a position of power; her sister might have held the title, but Ying was in control. Without self-restraint and proper planning (neither of which Hua had exhibited), Ying might have moved to challenge her sister immediately upon returning home.
But she didn't. She kept her cool and shook her head, denying the offer. The conversation's shift was welcomed.
Hydra, no. I don't think so.Their relationship would need drastic repairs — this could have been avoided! — before Ying even felt comfortable asking.
I found Fengmian while away. Maybe..., she swallowed and looked away, though only for a moment,
He would make a good husband.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 08, 2020
She scoffs.
为你服务。 他好是好，但不是我的类型。She laughs. The boy's scent was all over Ying- she did not want her leftovers. Besides, the boy beared some resemblance to her, which she found all kinds of weird. Black-capped, blue-eyed- that was enough, no thanks.
我要一个年轻人。 这样，他将来可能会有用。She explains. What she really wanted was a wife- but if she could not have a wife as her main counterpart, she would make sure the boy was useful. She cared not whether she truly loved him or not. All she could think was that a young man from these Wilds would be useful in diplomatic exchanges where knowledge of the language was required, or perhaps as a later sperm donor so she could build an empire. Skill and vitality were all that mattered here- her real love would probably lie on the side in secret.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 08, 2020
What's your type?Fengmian was strong and capable. He would make an impressive provider for whichever woman he chose. Somewhat insulted by Hua's tone, Ying continued:
You're not really in a position to be picky.It was a low-blow, but one that she felt was deserved.
There weren't many males on the coast; Ruo had already claimed one, and Ying had claimed several others.
Orochi?she asked. The suggestion wasn't really appropriate, but who else might be willing?
How young?She (surprisingly) didn't know many eligible men, but thought that stricter criteria might help.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Huā - March 08, 2020
Ying needed to check herself before she wrecked herself. The conversation had already wore Huā's patience down to a very thing string, and it would only be so long until that string snapped. Huā was controlled by her emotions rather than controlling them herself.
So each little backhanded attitude-filled remark irritated her further. She huffed in annoyance.
如果您要成为ch子，我不想谈论它。She would ignore the other inquiries until Ying cooled her tone.
RE: this long world like my thoughts - Ying - March 08, 2020
Okay. Maybe Ying was being a bitch, but she was also being honest. Her face twisted into something of both humor and insult, her body lifting back onto all fours.
Alright, she laughed,
Fine.There was nothing more to be said, as far as she was concerned. She looked to Hua — anything else? — and began to make her way back toward Fengmian. Unless called back, she would continue to the island.