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+--- Thread: Bearclaw Valley you can't know what i mean by what i say (/showthread.php?tid=41178)
you can't know what i mean by what i say - Merrick - May 03, 2020
merrick is v mopey & in a horrid mood, joiners beware
his nightshade had never turned him out of doors before.
he had gone from king of this entire wild estate and a meadow beyond to a spurned puppy booted out of @Astara's presence.
at first merrick had wondered what he had done when his fat killbird first turned his teeth upon him. something akin to regret, though its nature was self-serving. next, anger. she was his equal and the boy had not ceased to see her that way.
but she had never placed such a barrier of feral flaring between them. and one such occasion the bearwolf felt forced to act as if he were some wordless beast, heeding her edict and fleeing.
scorned, merrick wandered the left bank of the unnamed river, his step a shambling wreck of despair. but in the cyclops' single eye a banner of deepening suspicion begin to again mingle with malice.
the raven was leaving him.
leaving him for —
he had gone from king of this entire wild estate and a meadow beyond to a spurned puppy booted out of @Astara's presence.
at first merrick had wondered what he had done when his fat killbird first turned his teeth upon him. something akin to regret, though its nature was self-serving. next, anger. she was his equal and the boy had not ceased to see her that way.
but she had never placed such a barrier of feral flaring between them. and one such occasion the bearwolf felt forced to act as if he were some wordless beast, heeding her edict and fleeing.
scorned, merrick wandered the left bank of the unnamed river, his step a shambling wreck of despair. but in the cyclops' single eye a banner of deepening suspicion begin to again mingle with malice.
the raven was leaving him.
leaving him for —
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Skoll Almir - May 03, 2020
Skoll wasn't aware of Merrick's current predicament and him being in a bad mood. He wasn't actively searching for the leader of the pack, either, but as it turned out, the dark man seemed to run into him more often than not. It was fine, as long as Skoll kept up with what he was supposed to be doing, he'd be fine, in the end.
Though when he made his way to the other wolf, something seemed off. Skoll wasn't sure he wanted to find out or not. "Merrick." The words reached his voice.
@Merrick
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Merrick - May 03, 2020
he would have continued angrily stalking along were it not for the deep voice of skoll. merrick whirled upon the reticent soldier, brows knotting with frustration. "are you happy here?" he demanded from the stonemaw. the bear had stopped speaking for the present; merrick was upset by this, forced to communicate on his own.
and skoll had never said otherwise, being too direct for the boy's emotions.
so he asked again.
and skoll had never said otherwise, being too direct for the boy's emotions.
so he asked again.
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Skoll Almir - May 03, 2020
The expression on Merrick's face was enough of a warning when he turned around. Something was going on and Merrick was frustrated. The question confused him though. "Why wouldn't I be happy?" He mused out loud. Nothing was going on that made the tall man unhappy, maybe just weary. Living with the group was something that he was still getting used to, but he wasn't unhappy about it.
"There's nothing that could frustrat me, Merrick." He added on, at the end.
@Merrick
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Merrick - May 03, 2020
"i don't know!" merrick groused in a fit of irritation. "you just ... you never said you were." his anger in the moment was beginning to taper; he regarded skoll with a clearer look and swallowed, a breath swelling his sides. "she doesn't want me around anymore," he mumbled, tail lashing.
"and i don't like that."
a prince, given everything he ever wanted, and then suddenly not.
"and i don't like that."
a prince, given everything he ever wanted, and then suddenly not.
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Skoll Almir - May 06, 2020
Skoll didn't really understand what brought on this sudden outburst from Merrick. From what he'd seen, the man always was pretty well composed and knew how to hold himself. However, he also knew that one couldn't keep their emotions dialed in forever. Skoll just, didn't really get it.
"I would have left before the pack was formed if I wasn't happy." He noted. It was entirely true, if he became unhappy with Merrick or anyone else in the place, he would have abandoned it without another thought. He vowed himself to the pack, though, which meant he was staying for as long as he felt he needed. There was no reason for him to up and leave for no reason.
Merrick brought up the girl - he meant the one who didn't speak, right? Skoll found her to be the only reasonable wolf to think about when it came to Merrick's feelings in that way.
"Have you done anything to upset her?" He questioned, though Skoll doubted it. "Sometimes it's best to wait for things to blow over, or try to ask what's wrong." He added on at the end. Though Skoll wasn't the one to give advice like that - he didn't know how to talk with others well, either.
@Merrick
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Merrick - May 08, 2020
skoll was swift to assure merrick, in a deep voice that shook the boy to his haunted core and instilled confidence. with each passing syllable, the bearwolf was returning to himself, blossoming back into a proud fey thing. "i don't think i'm the problem. you know she got all fat, right?" he scoffed, turning his sharp attention back to the river.
"then evien was like, she's pregnant. and i'm like, no. this wasn't something i wanted."
he sulked.
"i think that's why she doesn't want me around. now she's going to have someone else. a baby." merrick scowled the syllable, spitting into the ground. his expression was contorted into the sneer of a bratty boy; he hunched his narrow shoulders and stared stonily out over the water.
"then evien was like, she's pregnant. and i'm like, no. this wasn't something i wanted."
he sulked.
"i think that's why she doesn't want me around. now she's going to have someone else. a baby." merrick scowled the syllable, spitting into the ground. his expression was contorted into the sneer of a bratty boy; he hunched his narrow shoulders and stared stonily out over the water.
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Skoll Almir - May 31, 2020
Skoll watched Merrick and listened to his words. So the woman was pregnant - Merrick got the mute woman pregnant. He'd not watched her closely, but must have noticed it in passing. How she pushed the other wolves away from her. "Both of your actions caused her to become pregnant." He noted. If Merrick didn't want children, he shouldn't have started something like that in the first place, and the raven woman shouldn't have gone with it if she had.
He held back from rolling his eyes at the notion she would have someone else.
"You both created a child, if anything you both will have something to look after. It won't change anything except you both being parents."
"or you both could just kill it." He added after a pause. Skoll wasn't sure if Merrick would try something like that. But knowing the smaller wolf, it had to have been a thought before.
@Merrick
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Merrick - June 08, 2020
merrick's lips curved with shock; a surprised chuckle worked its way out of his throat. "i suppose we could." it was not as if it had never occurred to merrick, but he did not yet know the heart of his nightbird. she would be lost be lost be lost — he held it like a stone within his heart and swallowed.
"i'm not fit to be a parent." garbled. bitter. the truth burned like acid on his tongue and yet he spat it for skoll to hear all the same. the consequence of his lust would be cyclical, but this time merrick had assured that he would be alone.
a tragedy for the boy.
"i'm not fit to be a parent." garbled. bitter. the truth burned like acid on his tongue and yet he spat it for skoll to hear all the same. the consequence of his lust would be cyclical, but this time merrick had assured that he would be alone.
a tragedy for the boy.
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Skoll Almir - June 09, 2020
Skoll didn't fully expect Merrick to actually murder whatever kids would come from the raven woman and him. He didn't think the mute woman would even let Merrick close to her spawn if he had any sort of intent to hurt or kill. Unless she decided to do the job herself. Though Merrick's next words didn't surprise him. Merrick was young - to be a leader and a father. He was moving fast with his life and it kind of showed, in the scars and wounds that lined his body and with the spawn that was his.
"You've got the entire pack to help you, and the woman." He noted. Merrick wasn't alone, even if he was sure none of them would be able to help much other than the one that was small and was a healer. However calming Merrick down was top priority in that situation.
"You won't be alone."
@Merrick
RE: you can't know what i mean by what i say - Merrick - June 14, 2020
it was both reassuring and not, he supposed. skoll would be near, but he would be alone. merrick pondered it a long moment, and then nodded. "you're right." whatever became of these tiny things, it did not change the fate of ursus. nor the purpose he had engendered for it.
"maybe it won't be so bad," merrick tried, though the words rang hollow in his mouth, bitter.
"maybe it won't be so bad," merrick tried, though the words rang hollow in his mouth, bitter.