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+--- Thread: Sawtooth Spire the dark clouds depart, and the damage is done (/showthread.php?tid=42202)
the dark clouds depart, and the damage is done - Phaedra - July 05, 2020
very late, stagnating in my drafts, but takes place immediately after this so if it fux with any timelines i am srry god nerfed my brain and turned all the remaining neurons into frenchfries
"i don't think they heard us, i can still hear shouting but it doesn't sound directed this way—"
"i has ears ok! and i hear 'em jus as good!" phaedra cut sharply in, crossness fretting her brow.
cain tamed the urge to call her out on her touchiness, knowing well enough that she was snapping at him in misdirected distress. instead, he tried a different approach. "you're right, you're allll ears!" he laughed, tackling her to the ground and nibbling the tips of her white lobes. "what haven't you heard?" phaedra shrugged him off her and got up to keep walking. she hadn't reached an age where body insecurity was on her conscious, so his teasing wasn't very effective and he rolled into the pine needles with an ohf!
"things i vunna hear." she said snottily.
the weasel surged ahead and rounded on her with a snickering, boyish remark. "well, i never heard some of those words before then. like fu—"
"lissen. jus s-stdop, really really jus ..." glancing away with a sulk when the marten stopped them both in their tracks and puffed up on her.
"i know you're upset at your mum and pa and you shouldn't've heard any of it but that don't mean you got any right to be rude to me over it." his voice was lemony and true and she winced with loss of face. she whispered an apology, staring at her toes.
sitting on her tuchis, the feeling she didn't like – guilt – crept into her. her shoulders wilted as she hedged a sigh into the midsummer air. after a moment, she asked, "can we maybe ... dawk about somedhing else?" eyebrows crumpled up in a pleading expression.
"if you want to we could work on your tee's? you're getting ... better at them!" he said hesitatingly, a minor depart from the truth meant to encourage her.
phaedra looked at this lying ass thicc slinky with doubt and sneered, blowing him a raspberry. "les jus ged pees off me afore any other else."
caintigern knew then that under the prevailing winds of her parents' snowsquall, her deep awareness of their dynamic had shifted, and her moods followed like a weather vane. he breathed out his agitation and didn't speak again until they reached the brook where the bairn could wash herself off. "look at this," he said, slipping into the water to demonstrate that it only came up to his neck. "if anything's gonna drown in this, it's the fish. ha." he quipped, sending a splash at her with his paw and paddling in a little circle.
phaedra flinched at the incoming spindrift, jerking up her shoulder to guard her face. "ausrede!" she bristled her ruff, watching warily as her friend sprawled out and closed his eyes, blissed out in the water under the nitid guillotine of sunlight.
she gave herself a look-over, scowling at the yellow disarray of her underside. phaedra didn't mind being dirty. to be certain, she preferred it, and her mother could corroborate that fact by enumerating the times she'd labored with her daughter trying to bathe her. stubborn as the girl was, eventually, any parent would concede defeat when de feet started kicking.
filth was not an issue. pee though ... it was uncomfortably clingy. to say nothing of the smell, sour and pungent. it made her feel unmistakable, like a full moon showcased on starless sky, gossiped about from thousands of miles away. she was concerned her mother would soon be tracking her down and that was the last thing she wanted after what she'd laid eyes on. the very thought turned her toes to ice; her lasting impression of her mother and father felt like a dead bird decomposing in her stomach and the hateful way they bore themselves to one another made her flesh creep. she could scarcely grasp what they'd said, but gut instinct now mildewed her construal of the ones who were supposed to make her feel safe.
how could she feel safe after that?
whatever the case, even getting phaedra to drink enough water to stay alive was an up-hill battle. she had to close her eyes so she would not see her reflection staring back at her. it was a haunting portrait of dolour she couldn't erase or escape unless her eyes were shut.
presently, gingerly as possible, she emplaced each foot in the water until all four were submerged in the cool, purling current. slowly, she brought herself down and straddled the streambed, teeth chattering from the adrenaline rattling about her insides in the very exact same manner of a pinball machine. she thirstily supped from the creek's artery, watching as the golden tint flushed from her coat. after a while, she felt all her muscles unclench, and her teeth stopped clacking in her jaws.
naturally, the relaxation allowed for the urges of certain muscles to ... let go. her lids went half-mast as she made more water, an arch grin fiddling with her lips. she watched caintigern expectantly.
the marten's eyes snapped open as he felt the coolness of the current turn warm, his gaze
following a gilt, frothy tide with horror as it pooled around him. gaping, he fixed the little wolf with an accusing glare. "oi! i am DOWNSTREAM you manky girl!" he yelped, prior mirth curdling on his face as he leapt from the baths with disgust. "oh, don't look so pleased. nice one, really." he said, shaking himself off.
she did, indeed, look pleased. idyllic satisfaction painted her expression, her cheeks bloated with a restrained giggle. "thaaaaank yew, du mürrsd." she mumbled the last, her smile dimpling elfin as she stretched her legs out in the water, chin skimming the surface. a mellow breath soughed from her lips.
"you're a minging devilkin you are. i'll be back, don't go anywhere." the marten started towards the woods before looking back with adamancy, "phaedra— i really do mean it."
"where- oh cain. grumpy! king grumpy boy!" she shouted after him as he darted into the thicket, letting fly a bellyful of laughter when he was out of sight. regardless of her humor, the largess of her emotions quickly distilled into a lonely uneasiness. she removed herself from the stream and slouched in the grass, hardly daring to stir until the adolescent marten returned after what felt like hours to a paranoid brain.
"jus gone an leff me forever, huh? rude forever." she said, rolling to her back so the sun could warm her tummy. the marten arrived carrying a crude satchel crafted from broadleaf between his teeth, tattily lashed together with thread-thin strips of bark that had been soaked in water until malleable. he informed her on his in-matter-of-fact "short" departure, then leapt over the brook and dropped the sheaf to gnaw the ligature until it snapped and the broadleaf bloomed open like a rose, revealing a bundle of crushed herbs packed in.
"is .. is id for eading?" she sniffed at it and recoiled at its ambrosial-laden scent. "nopes. where you fine id?"
"i didn't find it. a mate of mine made it. it's a mush of fyeprire and peppermint and goldenseal, he may have mentioned something else but i was in a hurry so lets hope it's not deadnettle. all i know is i'm meant scrub your belly with it because everyone within a hundred trees can smell you."
phaedra took visible offense and stared skeptically at him: "will id make my mama and papa come find me?"
"they're your parents. they'll find you regardless of your scent. i'm just tired of smelling pee." he smiled cheekily and canted his head towards the stream. "back in with you, then, smelly."
the mondblume scrambled to her feet in offense. "yow callin me names all the dime! you don' haveda be round me! you can jus' go! sides, maybe i like my smell!" phaedra gave back at him. she certainly didn't want him to leave, nor did she like smelling like pee, but she asserted herself nonetheless, cloudstrife rolling through her tone. cain ignored her fit of pique and set to the task of mulling his paws through the blend of herbs, combining the ingredients until it was a kaolin clay the color of sage.
caintigern's ear twitched as he heard her defeatist sigh and the sound of paws fording the stream. this time, it was his conscience that peopled remorse. he reflected, then sighed too. "i'm sorry, for all that. i won't call you names anymore. and i was kidding ... sort of, about why i got this," he admitted. "i noticed you have a rash on your belly from all your—" he glanced at phaedra, whose cheeks flushed as she quickly looked away. "the goldenseal will help with the rash, fyeprire is an oil i think, good for irritation, and the peppermint .. well, it'll make you smell like peppermint. that's better than pee, ay?"
"mama said she loves me cos i smell like bosoms." phaedra remarked with meek defensiveness, opening her mouth to speak again but clapping it shut in second thought before murmuring, "maybe she will love me less if i smell like ... papermend." pensive and troubled, she emerged from the water reclined on her back despite her reservations.
"blaa-smz. not bosoms." he corrected gently and then, to the best of his abilities, started smearing the herbs on her sternum, working his way down through her wet fur until the water made it into a nubbly paste.
they were both silent for a bit. then, "if your smell makes or breaks your mum's love for you then she isn't very good at being a mum i'm thinking." he said, working a twist into his brow which softened for what he said next. "from what i heard back there though, her love for you is fiercer than a wolverine, and i'm not just saying that because i'm concerned she's followed us here." he said with amplified inflection, glancing around the quiet brookscape before returning to his slathering.
phaedra leaned back and reflected on how horrible and disturbing it was to intersect on her parents' cross fire. each was an arbalist virtuoso with a tongue notched with venom-enameled quarrels and loosed them straight for the other's heart. unfortunately, phaedra'd been a casualty as well, though her heart had already calloused from preexistent blows of familial failure, and now all she felt was anger and anxiety.
"if thas bein a grown-up ids like, then i never ever wanna be one, nod never." she said with conviction, batting at a moth that flittered by and landed on the nib of her toes. she gazed at it, engrossed in her own thoughts, then suddenly started sniggering and lobbed her rear-leg reflexively. the moth flew upwards and out of the way.
"OW! what the ... why'd you bloody do that for!?" caintigern yauped, holding both paws to his snout. while scrubbing her down, he'd gotten a little too close to the bare skin of her belly and the tickling sensation had resulted in him getting a nice punt to the shnozz.
"i didn mean do, you dickled me, and yow face was in a'way!"
"well it wasn't on purpose! back into the stream you go, wash that stuff off while i make sure you didn't kick my nose into a gopher hole." he nasally complained.
after she had washed all the mortar off herself, phaedra gave her coat a good shake and smoothed down the soft fur of her chest. caintigern stood upright and gave an exaggerated whiff. "aaahh yes, back to normal pongy wolf smell, with a hint of peppermint. what now?" he asked with a flick of his bushy tail.
phaedra looked to the sky. the sun was accompanied by the faint halo of the moon, now, but she feared returning to the rendezvous site. wylla would come to bring her home, soon, but the moonmade girl would draw that inevitability out for as long as she could.
"ummmm ..." she considered her options carefully, twisty lips pursing when a game popped into her head. "hide and go sneak!" she play-bowed, tail waving. yes, this would be a good game to delay her mother. "i hide firsd! ok go!" and without allowing for any input from cain, phaedra raced into the shin-tangle.