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+--- Thread: Neverwinter Forest It feels like something I know (/showthread.php?tid=43936)
It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 18, 2020
for @Mal
backdated to 8/26
backdated to 8/26
She had been on the other side of the territory when she heard the sound of Mal's call echo through the trees. She should have answered it then, but the thought of racing there and then being in the presence of the entire pack felt incredibly exhausting. It was terrible for her to feel that way, she knew; she was the Beta—trusted with the responsibility of leading the pack even when it wasn't easy, and she felt like she was doing a shitty job lately. She patrolled and hunted and would help any packmate that asked, but being in a big gathering was just too much right now. And it wasn't like she ever sought out anyone's company either; it was easier to pretend nothing was wrong when she was alone.
But she had missed Mal and was worried about him, even more so when Cupid came home before him, and she knew they probably had pack things to talk about at the very least. So she only let a few hours go by before seeking him out. The sun had just set behind the mountains where the Moonspear wolves lived when she finally decided to pull herself away from the borders and start searching for his scent to track.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 18, 2020
He'd been a little taken aback by the news Miriam had gone and dropped on him. Now what could he do? Augh. He wanted to be back here bringing good news and in all honesty it hadn't seemed to have mattered. Not for the obvious reason. He'd sat around a fair bit before heading off for his other must-see news delivery of the day. After that he could go back and see his kids.
Needless to say the fact he was seeking Simmik as she was seeking him made it so they found each other pretty quick. He spotted her pale figure easily through the trees, calling out,
Simmik!He brightened a bit then. Well, maybe she would have a more expected reaction--- no wait he had bad news too. So maybe not ear to ear grin like he had for a second or two but he was happy to see her nonetheless. He did all of one bound in her direction before remembering his shoulder did kinda hurt, cringing at it before opting for walking towards her instead, tail wagging.
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 18, 2020
It didn't take her long to lock onto his scent as it came to her on the cool night breeze that swept against her face. It was soon apparent that he was headed her way, and so she continued forward, slowing once she saw him.
He didn't seem too worse for wear, given that he had bounded towards her. He called out to her, clearly having missed her as much as she missed him. He slowed, though, and her watchful gaze didn't miss the wince that briefly crossed his face or the slight hitch in his step. Her own expression filled with concern as she stopped in front of him.
Hey, Mal—she said first, the words cutting off when she saw the wound on his shoulder.
Are you okay?she asked, looking him over.
What happened?Her own shit was momentarily forgotten; she couldn't remember a time when she had seen Mal hurt, and she was suddenly hit with the thought that he could have been more hurt, or worse—what if he hadn't come back? Her heart raced for a few moments before she could get it under control, telling herself that she wasn't being rational and that he had come back.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 18, 2020
He wanted to keep going forward, give her a friendly headbutt or something else like that but since what happened, she'd been plenty standoffish and he wasn't sure what to do about it. He liked being physically affectionate to people, but he stopped himself short, sort of not-quite dancing in place so he didn't do anything she didn't like.
He literally shrugged it off,
It's fine -- I mean, it's not so bad. You should see the other guy,which at least for now was a good joke but wasn't sure if it actually would be later but it was all he could think up on the spot. It was unsurprising he was brushing his wounds aside, he had before so he was again,
Cupid took a look at it.That was enough, right? Please, it wasn't about him -- right now at least. He wouldn't mind a certain person or three fussing over him later one everyone else was dealt with, but not now...
He was really quick to keep talking,
But what would you like, the news for you or the news for the pack? I don't think you'd spin either as great, so can't use that as the decider.Head tilt. His tail wagging had shifted from an easy wag to sort of an uneasy one. Would she be happy with what he'd have to say?
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 18, 2020
She could tell he wanted to hug her or nuzzle her or affectionately greet her as had been their normal before, and she tensed a little in response, unsure if he would refrain. She wouldn't blame him if he didn't, but she didn't want to see the look on his face or feel guilty when she quickly ended the contact. Thankfully, he stopped himself, and she visibly relaxed some.
She wasn't surprised to see him act as if his injury was no big deal. It sounded like he had been in a fight, which sparked even more questions that she might have asked if given the chance. He had at least had the wound tended, and so she felt a little better about things. Cupid would have made sure he was taken care of and would continue to monitor things.
Good,she answered, deciding that earned him the right to change the subject for now.
His question had her heart racing a little and her chest tightening. His body language shifted a little, and she picked up on his anxiety. What kind of news would he have for her? She thought it was best to get that out of the way first so she could properly assess the pack news he had.
I guess mine first,she said after a few moments. As he said, neither seemed like good news, so she couldn't help but feel like she really wanted to answer that she didn't want to hear any of it. Of course, she wouldn't say that. It wasn't really true anyway; it was just her mind trying to avoid the things that might be too difficult for her to deal with.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 18, 2020
Okay yeah now he had doubts even though he didn't have them a minute ago. What if it wasn't good?
I found the guy who attacked you. He was the same one who attacked Liliana. I know where he lives. He just... Walked out in front of me like nothing at all. I tried to take a piece of his face, he wasn't to happy about it.Hence the wound.
But I doubt he's going anywhere any time soon. I think I got him good.But he didn't want to stick around to find out, that dude was big.
But again he kept talking, more rambling, because he wasn't sure what she'd think.
I wasn't ready. When I'm healed again I'm gonna go find Riley -- he wanted to help get back at the guy too. We'll all go find him.Mal wasn't sure if Simmik wanted to be part of that 'we' but he wouldn't be surprised if she'd rather Mal and company deal with it. Certainly Miriam wasn't interested in going along. He just wanted to fix things... Somehow.
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 18, 2020
I found the guy who attacked you.
The words stole her breath. Her jaw tightened and her muscles tensed. She swallowed and looked away. She hated talking about him or what he had done. And poor Liliana; she was just a baby. What kind of monster was he? She hated him. His face was all she saw when she closed her eyes and the memories constantly assaulted her no matter how hard she tried to ignore it all. So talking about it only forced her to deal with what she was afraid she couldn't deal with.
She felt the familiar urge to vomit and swallowed against it. She tried to concentrate on his words, but he sounded muffled. She drew in a deep breath, and then another, and then another.
But his next words were clear. They were going to find him. Her gaze flicked to his, her expression angry.
I want to kill him.The words were resolute and firm. She wanted to be the one to end his life—make him pay for what he had done to her and Liliana and anyone else he had violated. She wanted to rip out his throat and watch the life leave his eyes. Maybe then she could move on and feel normal again. Not like she was buried and suffocating under something she didn't know how to process.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 18, 2020
Mal was usually a peace-loving dude. Conflict was weird and too much trouble but this was definitely a line in the sand that he'd been pushed over. People weren't allowed to attack his family, just in general. The last time someone had been attacked, he'd never found the wolf that did it -- and yet this time he had. And that wolf had attacked two in his family, one being Mal's child. There just wasn't redeeming from that. Ever.
You aren't the only one.And it wasn't like he was gonna let her face down with some psycho on her own either -- the dude was big.
He watched her, wanting to make sure she wasn't going to go storming off. It was part of the reason he hadn't mentioned the location -- he couldn't chase after her the way she was, he'd make it a few yards before he had to slow down. Together meant waiting, and thankfully a shoulder was likely to heal far faster than a face. Mal hoped he'd grabbed an eye or something in the process -- again, hadn't stuck around to find out.
We need to be ready, both you and me.A plan or something might help too, especially since Mal was pretty garbage at fighting from usually avoiding the whole matter.
No surprises.
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 18, 2020
He misunderstood her words; he had taken them as a general statement. It was true, she did want him dead, but she thought that much was obvious.
No. I mean, if we find him, I want to be the one that kills him,she said, her tone growing more angry than she had meant. She wasn't stupid; she knew she wouldn't be able to take him on her own, and she had no intention of trying. But when they did actually search him out, and if they were lucky enough to find him alive, she wanted to be the one to deal the final killing blow. She knew she needed his help and the help of whoever else was willing, but when it came down to ending his life, she wanted to do it. He had hurt Mal's daughter, and she knew the anger it caused for him, so Simmik wasn't sure if he would allow her this. He wanted his revenge too, she was sure.
She could tell Mal expected something different from her, like she was going to go off on her own and search him out. But she wasn't going to do that. She never wanted to be alone with that monster again. She didn't exactly blame him for thinking that either. She hadn't really been herself lately, and she had always had kind of an impulsive nature, especially when angry. But she would wait and plan and make sure she was ready for if the moment ever did come. But with the resolution to wait came the fear that he was still out there. She wondered if he would be able to find his way here or if he even would.
You injured him enough that he wouldn't be able to follow you back?she asked, swallowing the lump of fear and nausea rising in her throat. Surely he wasn't stupid enough to come here and stoke the fury of the entire pack, but the thought still settled in her mind and added more weight to the fear that was already there all hours of the day.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 18, 2020
Can't focus on anything but I got a post done kinda?
His ears tipped back a little at her response. Well, okay, he understood but at the same time...
If you want anyone else along to back up so you can take a final swing I don't think that's gonna work. I don't want to give that monster a chance to do anything but die, let alone give a chance for him to get a good hit in. Anything else, we can figure it out.It seemed safest to treat this guy like you might a bull moose -- heinously dangerous and probably a bit unpredictable -- but at least Mal had actual respect for those animals. That guy needed to be eliminated, period. No funny business. Just dead. Dead with as little risk as possible to people Mal cared about (or who were along for the ride, let's be real he didn't know Riley at all).
He was bleeding damn everywhere and probably pretty blind when I ran. Nobody came after me. Was quiet the whole way -- but I didn't really sleep and the rain's still going so should be good.Which if it wasn't obvious why he was a little scattered at times, there you go.
If anyone unfamiliar shows up I can deal with it.Simmik didn't have to take that risk if she didn't want to and Mal would be more than happy to tell them what kind of monster they were doing errands for and take the heat for it.
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 18, 2020
His answer was not what she wanted to hear from him. And the fact that he was saying no because he didn't think she was capable of doing it on her own made anger swell in her chest.
So because I was attacked, I must be too weak to kill him?she said, her breathing increasing along with the beating of her heart. Later, she might realize that wasn't actually what he meant, but right now she couldn't see past her trauma. She viewed herself as weak because of what happened, so everyone else must view her similarly. It hurt to have him confirm her fears—it made her want to do whatever she could to prove herself and everyone else wrong.
Whatever comfort she might have gained from his assurance that he wasn't followed was overshadowed by her insecurity and anger. It only made things worse that he offered to take care of strangers at the borders like she was some injured, dainty woman who couldn't handle things on her own. She actually wasn't really doing a good job of handling things, but she didn't want anyone else to know that.
I don't need you to do that,she said abruptly.
I'm still capable of doing my job.Her chest tightened. Hurt, anger, and guilt all swelled inside her. She didn't want to be angry with Mal or combative about things, but it was like she couldn't control her responses. She was just so angry that she couldn't keep it from bubbling out of her any chance it got.
ugh. sorry mal :(
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 18, 2020
Okay now he was caught off-guard. He thought he'd been pretty reasonable. Miscommunication? Maybe? Had he done something wrong? Augh. His reply was quick, but not angry. He just wanted a solution,
Simmik, no, I want him dead, and none of us hurt! I don't want to have him turn out to just be playing almost-dead and then turn and kill one of us because we weren't treating him like a danger. I mean, look at me, I'm not doing this on my own, and I'm not gonna mess around with this guy. We kill him. That's the important part, right there.Which also sounded bizarre to say, even if he knew it was justified -- it wasn't like wolves had jail.
How'd he gone and made things go south here? How he wished he knew how to make things somehow go back to how things were months back. Stuff was okay then. His ears were still back on his skull, and he was a little quieter,
I just want you to be safe and comfortable. And if you're worried, then you don't have to be out there, it's ok. If you think it's fine, that's ok too.He was probably rambling, but his brain wasn't wired to be concise right now,
Nothing's changed with us. I'm still here, and you need me to do something, I'll help no matter what it is, just like always.A pause,
I just wanna help you.Should he add because she was family? He wasn't sure any more. Talking was awful. He just wanted to know how to make her feel normal again, because Mal sure as hell didn't know and what he'd done so far didn't seem like it helped.
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 18, 2020
What he was saying made sense and, deep down, she knew he was right. But it was difficult for her to see that right then; she was too blinded by her anger and getting what she was sure would allow her to move on from what had happened. She didn't want to agree to do things the way Mal wanted to do them, but she also didn't want to fight anymore about it. She could tell neither of them would change their mind, and she didn't want to push him anymore on it; she was tired of talking about all of this. She sighed and turned her head to look away.
Her eyes closed as he spoke again. She knew her reactions were confusing him. He certainly didn't deserve any of her anger. This was another reason she should just stay away from everyone. She felt safe here, but she wasn't sure how to feel comfortable with anything right now. She definitely didn't want to sit around and let Mal do all the dangerous stuff.
The more he talked, the worse she felt. He wanted to help, and all she could offer was an angry outburst that was not his fault. She could feel the threat of tears, but she opened her eyes and blinked them away; she didn't want to cry here. When she was sure the tears were held at bay for now, Simmik looked up at Mal.
I don't know how you can help right now,she quietly admitted.
I'm sorry.She really was. She, too, wished he could just swoop in and magically make it all go back to normal, but they both knew better than most that life was never anything close to that easy.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 19, 2020
There was a moment there where Mal just paused. Then, he relaxed a little, head lowering slightly. He reached out at the air with his nose, as he might have done to tap her.
You just tell me... Whenever there is, whatever it is.He hated this. He wanted to actually be able to comfort her -- it wasn't like he knew the right words for any of this. He tried. Why couldn't a hug from someone who wasn't ever going to hurt her somehow fix things a little? It was stupid. It should. Just because.
And then a pause,
Do you want to hear the other thing? Or -- I don't know, I could wait a bit.If Simmik wasn't planning on going anywhere, then it wouldn't matter what the Saints were doing. Hua knew, so at least the wolves on her end of things, who Mal imagined would end up in slightly more danger if they crossed paths with a Saints member, would know to be careful. He didn't really expect anyone else here to go wandering.
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - September 19, 2020
She nodded at his promise, tensing some when she thought he was going to touch her with his nose like they both were known to do before. But again, he didn't actually touch her, and she relaxed again. She wished she could find comfort in his affection like she once had, but it was still too much to be touched by anyone. Hopefully, it wouldn't always be that way, at least not with those she trusted.
No, that's okay. Tell me.She was eager for a change of subject. Plus, as she had already stated, she wanted to keep doing her job, which meant being informed, even if she did kind of want to find somewhere quiet and be alone for a while after such an emotional roller-coaster. Whatever he had to tell her was clearly important, though, so that would have to wait until later.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - September 19, 2020
Okay on to the other bad bit. Well, maybe bad. It certainly wasn't gonna make Simmik smile. He'd wanted this whole thing to be happy and instead he felt more like his energy was just fizzling out. Maybe it was because he really should sleep now that he was back. Asmoses. Her response to the first thing. Now... Best get it over with. No grins.
When I was out looking for Cupid, I ran into someone from the Saints. Not Donovan, not the crazy chick. Could have been Donovan's brother or something, looks kind of weird, and a funny tail too, but darker colored.That was probably enough to either strike a chord or not. She'd said that other people had shown up, but if he didn't sound familiar, then he could give a better description.
He introduced himself mostly by saying Neverwinter wolves shouldn't be around there. I tried to suggest that messing with us maybe he might be against Donovan's wants -- that we hadn't been actual enemies, that they hadn't done anything bad to us directly before. Didn't seem to matter. He tried to attack me -- I didn't stick around.It wasn't like Mal had trusted the guy at all. He got the hell outta dodge. Then there was the further point,
He was also the one who attacked Cupid and messed up his eye.
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - October 02, 2020
The mention of Donovan and the Saints had her tensing again. She had tried very hard to avoid thinking about him anymore than was necessary, which was only when she needed to warn others about his pack. She wasn't the same Simmik, and she wasn't capable of any kind of relationship with the Saints leader. She was in no position to try and save him from himself, and a dumb part of her felt guilty for that, so she just pushed it to the back of her mind and tried to pretend she would never have to deal with it. But that meant whenever he was mentioned or she was forced to bring him up, she was also forced to think about all that stuff.
She had actually met the wolf he described, but there was no way she would remember that now; the description was too vague and too much time had passed.
He doesn't sound familiar,she said flatly. She hadn't really met much of Donovan's pack, aside from his crazy co-leader and the couple wolves that came to back her up that day in the mountains, and she wouldn't exactly consider that meeting them. Anytime she had spent with their leader, it had been just the two of them, which caused her to wonder if that was intentional in his part. That was beside the point here, though.
To hear that this guy had tried to attack Mal was bad enough, but the fact that he had also attacked Cupid had anger burning in her chest; it just further solidified her suspicions that he was never truthful with her about his intentions, no matter how convincing he had seemed at the time. She shook her head and sighed.
We need to make sure no one goes into the mountains right now,she told him.
The Saints have made it clear that we are enemies, and I don't want anyone else getting hurt.Of course, they couldn't monitor everyone or make them do anything, but they could at least stress the danger.
And if anyone finds any signs that they have come around here, we need to know. We should call everyone together and talk to them.She released another sigh, clearly feeling the weight of the situation.
Should we talk to Kaistleoki and Moonspear too?she asked. She assumed he would inform Huā since she was here.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - October 03, 2020
He nodded,
It'd probably be a good idea. I don't think many here do too much traveling, so hopefully it's not going to be an issue.Except there was kind of the issue that plans would be interrupted. Delayed? Something like that. First a spy would show up, then Cupid died.. It kind of put a wrench in things.
I did tell Hua what happened. I think she knows Kaistleoki better? Maybe she's planning to talk to them. Moonspear is probably secondary since they're farther away.But when? He didn't know. Sometime.
We can make sure they know though. But not right now.. I-- I probably should rest at some point.How long had he been up? At some point he was gonna crash pretty damn hard. His ability to make sense was fragmenting a little. He looked down. Why didn't things ever go the way they were planned?
RE: It feels like something I know - Simmik - October 15, 2020
Well at least they could try and protect the rest of their pack from the liar and his wolves. She just hoped they listened to the warning and stayed close to the forest. She knew it was hard to make some really know the danger if they hadn't experienced it for themselves.
She was clearly getting ahead of herself. And Mal was right: Hua did know Kaistleoki better than they did, so it made sense for her to talk to them.
Of course...yeah, I'm sure you're tired,she quickly replied.
Sorry.She shuffled a little uncomfortably on her paws.
I'll let you go rest and you can just find me later to talk more about stuff.Honestly, she needed some time by herself anyway after that emotional roller-coaster of a conversation.
RE: It feels like something I know - Mal - October 15, 2020
Can probably archive here?
There were so many things that would need to be gone over in coming days. He needed to plan and find Asmoses and then plan other things and do stuff and he was probably forgetting another dozen, they were all bleeding together right now.
Yeah, yeah. We definitely will need to. Planning.A wide nod.
Yeah, I'll go and... I'll check back.He lurched briefly towards her again but was stopped short by his injured shoulder and remembered he probably shouldn't.
But everyone was home and ok. That was good. He started limping his way towards Aibreann's den -- that last batch of kids and he'd have seen everyone and would probably just crash out there for a while, probably after she double checked Cupid's work.