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+--- Thread: Lion Head Mesa You've got smoke in your eyes (/showthread.php?tid=48768)
You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 15, 2021
It was roughly midday when Crowfeather had worked his way back to the heart of the mesa in search of @Satsu, hoping that he might find her and confide his exasperations to her. The longer he trekked, the heavier his thoughts became. It did little good to mull over his talk with Germanicus. All those thoughts and for what? To know that the silver eagle did not want for Crowfeather to participate in the war, that he wished to march alone into battle.
The dark wolf’s teeth clenched tightly as he thought back to when the older man had first returned, had told the yearling that they would spar in preparation. No sparring had taken place. There were no attempts to prepare Crowfeather for the danger that was on their doorstep, nothing at all. Nothing more than Germanicus’ wants and wishes-
Crowfeather trudged through the caverns, scowling to anyone who met his gaze.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Satsu (Ghost) - October 15, 2021
dancing across the mesa now, in a pleasant mood and thrilled by the morning's events, satsu journeyed beneath the major red arch and then upward, following the inclination of the stone, until she was returned to the heart of the territory.
the sun was harsh by this point; it was not her usual time to be out of doors, and she did greatly desire something to slake her thirst, but nothing could dissuade her from enjoying the daylight while she could.
she saw the shifting of a shadow and paused, watching the shape long enough to recognize crowfeather. he did not look pleased at all; the usual easy-going attitude the boy so often exuded had been somehow mollified.
satsu was not quick enough—already he was dipping towards the caverns, and with a sigh the queen moved to follow. she shot a look over her shoulder in case anyone was watching her, dismissive of them, before ducking to follow.
her steps were light, the rest of her lead-heavy.
crowfeather?she called for him, searching the dark corners.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 15, 2021
The woman’s voice stunned him into halting. Crowfeather was still lost in his mind, deep in thought. When he turned to her, he stared through her. Somehow, he had walked himself breathless. It took several seconds before he realized that it had been Satsu who had called out to him, who had stepped to catch up to where he was. The dark wolf blinked quickly, shaking his head so that he might rid the thoughts from his mind.
Satsu,Crowfeather sighed, the weight of his frame sagged slightly.
How have you been?the shadow thought it best to let her speak about her preparations, about the Pharaoh and their plans. He realized that he had wanted so badly to speak his thoughts to her, to give voice to his frustrations, but it was not right to put her in that place. Crowfeather swallowed the shame that had formed like a lump in his throat.
Still, the thoughts persisted through his mind.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Satsu (Ghost) - October 15, 2021
the shadow was bereft. it was easy to read, especially so as he took on a vacant expression, as if he did not know his own name. the girl moved closer. she smiled thinly, trying to be warm, knowing she was partly to blame for his current state - and unable to explain herself.
a fluttering in her chest came when he asked after her, as if his own worries weren't plainly written within the stooping of his figure, the look upon his face. his eyes, usually jovial, looked clouded.
i am well,as if he hadn't seen her in weeks! it seemed that much had changed in only a day or so. satsu motioned for him to follow her, and together they walked until the corridor swept deeper, towards the wellspring - and then to an alcove just before.
something troubles you. is it our enemy? or the bear-man and his people, at their camp? please, tell me. i am not a queen yet, i am your friend.
something thick caught in her throat after, which she swallowed down.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 15, 2021
Satsu was well, she said as much.
Good, good,he spoke absently in return.
The woman seemed to know that there was something wrong, something that troubled him. Crowfeather looked sharper, staring at her with a frown. Satsu wondered if it was their enemy, the bear wolves who had gathered just outside of the mesa, but it was not necessarily in these words that he found displeasure. It was in the few that followed.
You are not my queen, Satsu.
The dark wolf’s voice was tired, diminished.
You are my friend, but you will never be my leader.
Crowfeather blinked and drew his gaze away from her own, barely aware of the words he had offered to the blue-eyed girl, to his friend. He could not help but feel that he was being trapped. The Pharaoh wished him to stay there, Satsu spoke as though he had already been given his place in their ranks, he felt as though there had been a severe misunderstanding.
We should all be troubled by our enemy. I do not understand how you have such a cool head, Satsu. You, Pharaoh… Germanicus.Crowfeather frowned.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Satsu (Ghost) - October 15, 2021
the words which flowed from him were soft and cruel. satsu was breathless. wounded by the fine blade of his tongue. a sheen carried across her vision immediately as if she had been stung - and hadn't she?
the boy was distracted; she took that moment to suck a silent breath and white knuckle her composure before he saw. all that was on crowfeathers mind, again, always, was germanicus!
you are not my queen.
how could he be so cold?
never.
it is not the first or the last time that someone far-away threatens me, or those i - the people dear to me,she grimaces in the dark to keep from tearing up again;
my family. i must trust in them.
she finds her trust in him intimately shaken.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 19, 2021
Something had shifted between the two wolves.
Crowfeather felt his chest heave, watching as Satsu turned her face from him. You’ve hurt her, he reprimands himself internally. The bite of that realization stings sharp against his heart. The dark wolf felt that he had made a terrible mistake, that he and Germanicus should never have visited Akashingo. How easy it would have been to keep their friendship, had Crowfeather never entered the mesa, how simple his life would be.
Satsu spoke of her family, of those she trusted. The shadow felt himself shake softly.
Crowfeather was seized by bitterness, sadness, and the looming sensation that he was alone.
How fortunate… to have the support of family,the shadow said breathlessly. Did he believe that the wolves who called themselves members of Akashingo would prove to be kind to Satsu? He was uncertain, but Crowfeather was startlingly aware that he had no power over her decisions to remain or where she placed her trust. It was not his life, they were not his choices.
I need to know if you are aware of any herbs that will conceal scent,he asked her suddenly, pointing the sharpness of his nose toward her with intent behind his gaze.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Satsu (Ghost) - October 19, 2021
i like to think that you are family too, crowfeather.
this is what she wanted to say, even as her heart pinched in her chest. even as he denounced her, verbally spitting in her face for all that she had accomplished, and caught herself before she could voice such a sentiment. he was asking for herbs of some kind; as if she should know what to say to that!
why?many reasons flit through her mind now.
do not tell me it is to go adventuring alone, crowfeather.did he think to strip himself of all scents, then abandon akashingo? abandon germanicus? this was not what satsu - or ramesses - had wanted at all.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 19, 2021
As soon as she asked him why, Crowfeather began to fret. He did not want for Satsu to know his plan, for her to sniff it out of him through the cracks in his foundation. It would not have been hard, for he cared deeply about the woman and his friendship with her was a treasure he had never anticipated. It did not change the fact that while he loved Satsu, his feelings for the girl paled greatly in comparison to the love he felt for Germanicus.
We are considering a spy,Crowfeather whispered softly, his eyes darting around to make sure that there was no one who could listen to him share this information.
But they must know what they are looking for first and we cannot send them if they smell anything like Akashingo.
It was not entirely a lie, but it was only a half truth. Yes, they had discussed the idea of sending a spy to the Saints and trying to learn more of their enemy. It had not been decided who might go. Crowfeather had made that choice for himself. He only needed to make sure that he would not be found out, that they could not use him to get back to the mesa.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Satsu (Ghost) - October 19, 2021
the abrupt shift in the conversation made satsu's head spin.
so it wasn't that crowfeather would go himself! she could breath a little easier.
i... i do not know herbs well, unfortunately,she answered late.
but now that i know, i will keep watch for someone who could do such a thing. you weren't thinking of going yourself?
satsu knew what the saints were like. how tenacious they were, and formidable, and all manner of beastly. she could not fathom seeing crowfeather walk among them - or rather, the aftermath once nyra sniffed him out.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 19, 2021
Satsu said that she did not know much of herbs, but this didn’t bother the dark wolf. Ramesses had implied that she could share her knowledge with him. It seemed that perhaps Crowfeather could teach her a few things about the natural plants that the healers of his clan had once used. Something about this warmed him, he almost forgot about the words he had shared with Germanicus.
Oh, no,the seer said with a small laugh.
Could you imagine? Me as a spy… hah.
Crowfeather smiled gently to Satsu, swinging his tail from side to side. He could not have her thinking that he would leave. After he had gone, it did not matter how much she knew.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Satsu (Ghost) - October 19, 2021
his laughter came easily. satsu mirrored him, though her tone was more forced, easily harmonizing despite feeling ill about the entire conversation. she was glad he was not going to go and face the saints alone, with his kind eyes and open emotions; what sort of spy indeed?
i am glad,the ascendant went on to say, sighing audibly, and then shaking some of the tension from her shoulders - a quick shimmer of her coat.
you mean a lot to me, crowfeather. i— when i speak of family, you.. are among them.
the last thing satsu could handle was the loss of another brother.
in the graylight of the underground, perhaps he would miss the red of her cheeks.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 19, 2021
The dark wolf burned, and he was forced to fix his eyes on the ground near his paws.
Thank you, Satsu…
Crowfeather had never known the comforts of a family like that, one who cared for its members and showed that care through acts of love. The family that the seer had run from was one he was grateful to be rid of. It did not erase the sensation of guilt from his belly, but it did give him hope. Satsu – she gave him hope, with each kindness that she shared.
You mean a lot to me, as well, you know.
That is why I must go. That is why I must try to spare you and Germanicus from this madness.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Satsu (Ghost) - October 19, 2021
her blushing slowly diminished. when her eyes lit upon him once more, he was looking to the ground, as if he were suddenly wajo to akashingo; his tone is sombre like germanicus maybe, and this comparison brings a smile to her face at last.
a small girlish chuckle becomes a true giggle, and then satsu sighs.
you sound like the roman,but it was fitting, she thought. the boy seemed less youthful in this moment, as if something had begun to shift within him. he seemed... resolute.
i will look for someone suitable for this mission. i promise to find someone, and they will be waiting by your sleeping place by this evening.
but she would not be fulfilling this promise so soon—not when the choice has already been made by crowfeather, unbeknownst to the ascendant. she draws close to him and gives him a small kiss of her nose against his cheek, a friendly, familial gesture.
do not worry,satsu says for her sake as much as his own.
their earlier fighting is not forgotten but for now satsu puts it aside.
drawing back again, she nods a silent dismissal so that crowfeather may feel free to go, should he choose. there is now one more thing added to satsu's growing list of priorities and she is quite overwhelmed.
RE: You've got smoke in your eyes - Crowfeather - October 19, 2021
You sound like the roman.
Crowfeather closed his eyes tightly, drawing a long breath into his lungs. You mustn’t cry, he pleaded with himself before finally offering Satsu a small laugh.
Satsu then promised that she would find someone who could fill the role of a spy, someone they could send into the heart of the Saints territory to gather information. The shadow nodded his head in understanding. She stated that she would have someone for him to send and that they would be waiting beside Crowfeather’s sleeping quarters before night fell.
The kiss to his cheek beat against his heart with wicked ferocity.
I will know you have sent them, then,he said with a nod and turned to leave.
Before he had gone, Crowfeather turned back to Satsu and gazed upon her cool blue eyes and gentle features. You may never see her again, his mind whipped this thought against him in punishment. Crowfeather did not wish for his last words to Satsu to be a lie. He did not think that he could stand knowing this.
You will make a great queen, Satsu.
A gentle smile, an expression of love, and then he slipped away.