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+--- Thread: Duskfire Glacier raise your shoes (/showthread.php?tid=49667)
raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 10, 2022
Aside from the kids (who were barely kids anymore), there were other wolves she sought for a proper farewell. Only as she considered tracking them down did it occur to her that most of the adults currently residing in the pack were strangers to her. Meerkat found a strange sort of comfort in that.
@Lane and @Rye were the only holdovers from summer. She didn't want to call for either of them. One was a busy Alpha with enough on her plate and the other was still in mourning. But as she took a final tour of the glacier, Meerkat hoped she might bump into one of them, particularly Lane.
Tags are invitational but not obligational. :)
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - January 10, 2022
Lane approached Meerkat with a friendly wave of her tail.
"Meerkat! Hey! Veteran mentioned that you were back. I've been wondering what you found." The last time they spoke, Meerkat had planned to head west to scout out potential territories for Duskfire Glacier's move.
Issorartuyok and the kids had found a promising territory, but it was awfully far away. Lane was interested to know if Meerkat had met with any success.
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 10, 2022
Fortune smiled on her today, delivering her into the path of the Alpha female. Lane approached her with a friendliness that made Meerkat's chest twinge. She would really miss the woman, as well as the chance at a closer friendship. She just hoped they ended up on friendlier terms than she had with Lane's counterpart.
The Alpha expressed curiosity in her findings, though did they matter now? "Hey! There were some promising territories near the coast," Meerkat said, humoring her, "but it sounded to me like Issorartuyok and the kids found the promised land."
Of course, she must bring Lane up to speed on more personal matters. "Speaking of him... I called things off a bit ago. We're just too different." Meerkat paused, considering her next words. "And I actually hit it off with someone else, someone who's a much better fit for me. He's a friend from Sapphique."
She let that information sink in for a moment before sharing, "I didn't talk to Issorartuyok for a month, until the other day. And, ah, the conversation... it didn't go well." She would spare Lane the details. "Long story short, my time with the glacier is over. I won't be going with you guys." Meerkat lowered her eyes, giving Lane a chance to react to the news.
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - January 11, 2022
Of course, Veteran and the other kids had already told Meerkat all about their "perfect" mountain in the hinterlands. Lane thought it was a little too far to go, especially if Meerkat had found good territory on the coast, but Lane doubted that the scouting party would be dissuaded from their "promised land," as Meerkat put it.
"Yeah.." Lane affirmed, looking a little sheepish. Issorartuyok and the children would not be easy to convince. Lane planned to visit one of Meerkat's territories herself if the scout felt strongly about any of them, and that way Meerkat would have another voice on her side. Lane would have told Meerkat her plan, if the young scout hadn't distracted her with a super juicy piece of hot goss.
"Really--?" Lane asked, immediately interested to know more about this mysterious Sapphique friend. Meerkat went on to share even bigger news: she wouldn't be joining the Glacier wolves when they moved.
"Oh wow," Lane commented, collecting herself for a beat. "I'm sad for us, but really happy for you." Lane's voice was congratulatory. This was a happy thing, after all. "You really like this guy enough to move in together, huh?" She was teasing now, just a little. Just to see if she could get a smile out of Meerkat.
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 11, 2022
The positive reaction actually made her feel torn. She was really going to miss Lane in particular, her son too. Meerkat snorted lightly at the teasing remark, feeling her cheeks warm. It was quite a serious step, she supposed, but it felt right. And it made sense, especially given the circumstances. But she felt a slightly self-conscious twinge, Issorartuyok's face flitting briefly through her mind, his accusations echoing.
She slammed the door shut on those recollections, smiling at the Alpha female. "Thanks, Lane. Yeah, I'm pretty dang fond of him. I've known him for a while, though things only took a romantic turn recently. I dunno, we literally ran into each other and things just clicked."
Her brown eyes had gone soft and happy, though they flashed with sadness a moment later. "I'm really going to miss you guys, though, and this place." She motioned toward the glacier towering over them. "These past six months meant a lot to me."
She gazed up at the enormous wall of ice for a moment, then dropped her gaze back toward Lane's face. "How are you doing with everything?" Meerkat wondered.
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - January 16, 2022
The man was a friend, who Meerkat had only recently re-conceptualized in a romantic way after things between her and Issoratuyok fell apart. There was a word for that: rebounding. Lane did not speak this thought out loud though, unwilling to rain on Meerkat's parade. If things didn't work out with her new man, Meerkat knew she had a place with the Duskfire wolves, wherever they ended up.
Lane nodded regretfully. "We'll miss you too. It will be strange to leave you behind when we move... it's almost like we're starting over with a brand-new pack." In just a few short months, Duskfire Glacier had turned over almost all of its members. Speaking of which...
Before she could ask if Meerkat had seen Rye or Eldritch around, Meerkat redirected the conversation onto Lane, asking how she was doing.
"Oh, uh.. I'm just trying to get through one day at a time," Lane admitted. "Lately, it's like Firefly Glen all over again. One crisis after another. I just hope it'll be different, in Issoraruyok's promised land." God, she was tired. She didn't know it yet, but in only a few short days, life would deliver yet another crisis to their doorstep in the form of an injured young woman and an ally under attack.
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 16, 2022
Lane gave voice to Meerkat's earlier thought. She didn't mention how the turnover made the decision to leave a little easier. Because on the other hand, it was quite upsetting to see what had become of the tightly-knit pack she had joined over the summer, the one where she had carved a place for herself entirely of her own volition. She supposed everything had begun to fall apart the day Wintersbane had been struck; he was only the first domino to tip over in the stack.
Meerkat's face scrunched when Lane compared it to Firefly Glen, her heart squeezing in her chest. Without really thinking about it, she scooted closer and—should the Alpha female allow it—seated herself just beside her to sling an arm over her shoulder, tugging Lane into a sideways hug meant to convey comfort and solidarity.
"I don't know of a way to say this without it sounding super generic," Meerkat said, dipping her head to catch Lane's eye, "but you're doing great. Really."
She let that remark dangle in the air a moment before her brow furrowed thoughtfully, replaying some of Lane's words in her head. "Do you still think moving the pack is for the best?" she asked slowly, eyes searching the side of the other woman's face. "Especially so far?" Yes, the herds were a concern. But what about their home, their alliances, their... everything?
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - January 17, 2022
Lane's breath wooshed out of her in a long sigh as Meerkat slung an arm over her shoulders and offered her word of support. "Thanks." She leaned into the other woman. It didn't seem fair to her that she would be leaving this friend behind now, when their friendship seemed to be blooming so nicely. Meerkat voiced a similar sentiment out loud, wondering if Lane truly thought that moving was their best course of action.
"I just don't know," Lane admitted. There was no way of knowing what would be best. "But I can't watch them starve. I can't handle seeing their disappointment, when I tell them this place can't support pups in the spring." Wouldn't that make her the worst kind of hypocrite, standing there beside her own illegitimately-conceived pups while she told the mated pairs they weren't allowed to grow their families? Could Duskfire survive that? Lane thought not.
"It's hard to explain, but Issorartuyok and I.. as long as we rule here, we stand in the shadow of Wintersbane and Tzila. I think that this is why Issorartuyok has chosen a place so far away from everything, and everyone." Although not Moonglow, Lane recalled-- Veteran had mentioned that Moonglow was within easy travelling distance of their promised land.
"I don't believe in curses, but..." Lane shook her head. "Firefly Glen was hit by a falling star. Wintersbane was struck by lightning." Lane looked to Meerkat helplessly, begging her to confirm that these events were near-unbelievable. "I think we need to do something to change our, uh.. energy." Something big. Something drastic. A completely fresh start didn't seem so crazy, in light of all that had happened.
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 17, 2022
She listened without interruption as Lane tried to articulate her thoughts on the situation. When Lane mentioned Issorartuyok, Meerkat frowned. Bitterly, she wondered if he really had the pack’s best interests at heart, or simply his own. Would he do anything—including wed anyone—if it meant procuring children?
Recognizing the thought as uncharitable, Meerkat dismissed it and refocused on what Lane was saying. She didn’t believe in curses, either, though she understood where her friend was coming from. It sounded like Lane wanted to escape this negative energy, as well as the former leaders’ shadow, and that was valid. Meerkat was just happy to hear that Lane had her own reasons for going along with such a drastic change of scenery.
Not for the first time, she thought of their nearby allies, which included Sapphique. The caribou’s illness did not seem widespread enough to impact anyone else so severely, even in nearby Rivenwood. Meerkat found that strange and wondered why they didn’t simply team up with the neighbors until the situation resolved. The Alphas must’ve had their reasons, though, which included what sounded like a desperate yearning for a kind of tabula rasa.
Speaking from experience, there’s a lot of merit to a fresh start,Meerkat murmured.
Leaving home and trekking across the wilderness won’t be easy, though the risks should be worth the reward, I think. And it’s less risky than staying,she thought aloud.
I was just telling Vet about the hinterlands. I was born there. I think they’ll make a great home for you guys, once all the dust settles. Speaking as someone who grew up there, it’s a great spot for pups.
Her lips twitched and suddenly Meerkat caught herself wondering aloud,
Hey, do you have any prospects for the spring?Despite the heaviness of the conversation, she leaned into their sense of rapport and waggled her eyebrows suggestively, loosing a light laugh.
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - January 29, 2022
Meerkat seemed to shift gears when Lane confirmed her desire to move. Now the young scout sounded more optimistic about the hinterlands, and Lane could hear the nostalgia in her voice. Maybe that meant Meerkat and her man (and their family?) would visit someday. All of these thoughts were a comfort to Lane.
On the subject of pups, Meerkat asked Lane about her "prospects for spring."
"What, like prospects for pups?" Lane voiced, with more surprise than she justifiably should have felt, given that she was already a mom and a Duskfire leader. Of course others would expect her to have another litter. "I can barely manage the kids I have," she admitted, "I wasn't really like.. dying to have more, honestly. I've just got a lot on my plate." Had Meerkat still been a member of Duskfire Glacier, perhaps Lane would not have been so honest for fear of disappointing her. But now that Meerkat was a little more detached, Lane felt she could open up.
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 29, 2022
Meerkat nodded at the question. She was actually interested in Lane’s love life, though pups were a foregone conclusion to marriage in her mind. When Lane declared she wasn’t sure if she actually wanted more offspring, it surprised her a little. It made her wonder if that meant Lane didn’t want a mate either.
Yes you do. Well, for what it’s worth, you made some pretty cool kids,she said, thinking primarily of Veteran but Wayfarer too.
What about guys though?she wondered.
Has anyone caught your eye? Or are you too busy to date?she jested lightly, dearly hoping that wasn’t the case for her friend.
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - January 29, 2022
"Thanks," Lane accepted the compliment with a smile. Her kids had turned out okay, despite their unplanned conception. She knew she had her packmates to thank for that-- with Wayfarer and Veteran, it had taken a village.
"Oh.." What about guys? Lane's heart fluttered as her thoughts landed on Tuuluuwaq. "Sort of both, I guess. Tuuluuwaq and I had.. a connection." She met Meerkat's eyes with a playful smirk, knowing that she was likely to inspire even more curiosity by being intentionally vague.
"He asked to court me, but I only ever get to see him when we need each others' help sorting out the latest crisis." How did busy pack leaders manage to find the time to just casually date and get to know people?
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 29, 2022
She hardly knew the man, though she had to wonder if Tuuluuwaq’s mannerisms were like his brother’s. Recalling how he’d denied her the familiarity of a nickname, she decided the odds were good. She didn’t think Lane would mind nearly as much as she did. In any case, she smiled warmly when the Alpha female said his name, mentioning a connection.
Lane! That’s pretty exciting. Only I’m bummed that you guys can barely spend any down time together. I think that will change after the move though, right?she posited optimistically.
Meerkat fell into a thoughtful silence for a moment before saying,
Especially if you don’t intend to claim breeding privileges, have you ever thought of taking on a different role besides Alpha? I think you’re doing a great job but you were kind of thrust into the position. And didn’t you only intend to lead temporarily? Sorry, that’s totally unsolicited advice.
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - January 29, 2022
"I'm hoping," Lane nodded, voicing her agreement that things should be quieter after the move.
Meerkat's "unsolicited advice" brought light to one of Lane's most carefully guarded secrets. She let out a huge sigh and seemed to visibly deflate, very much looking like overfull balloon wheezing out unwanted air.
Lane wouldn't have dreamed of confiding her secret in Meerkat if she had still been a packmate, but as things stood now...
"Hey, no, don't worry, I take all the advice I can get. I actually have two advisors in the pack now, and I still can't figure out what I'm doing." She laughed. On a more serious note though... "I think about that a lot, honestly. Just.. going back to being a medic and a ranger. The main reasons I stepped up to lead were to make the pack a safer place for my kids--" At the time, Makatza had still been at large-- "..and to help instill confidence in Issorartuyok." He had been a fairly new addition back then, and some of the longer-standing pack members were unsure of him. Things were very different now, on both fronts. Issorartuyok was more than capable of leading in his own right.
"But Issorartuyok seems uh, I don't know..." Lane wasn't sure how to put it. "Like, every time we talk, he's always saying how much our people love me, and how great I am for the pack, and how he 'hopes to one day be as good as me' and all that. Even though he doesn't need me anymore, I think he still thinks he needs me." Lane hesitated, and then she fell quiet. She ad no idea if she was making any sense. Come to think of it, was Meerkat okay with all this talk about Issorartuyok? Lane knew she had her new man now, but she imagined there was still some hurt there.
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - January 29, 2022
Lane insisted that she didn’t mind advice, before admitting she often thought about resuming her vocations prior to leadership. The first reason wasn’t so relevant anymore, the latter similarly unnecessary.
Meerkat felt a little tension in her shoulders as the topic shifted to Issorartuyok. She admittedly worried about his visions for pack life more than she had before, her take colored dramatically by their recent contention. But she was an adult who could separate her personal feelings and address Lane’s deliberations.
I think you balance him out in a good way. That said, you should think of yourself and your needs. It’s okay to consider him, your kids, the rest of the pack. Of course. But you should also think about what you want, Lane. What’s best for you? You don’t have to answer that right now, or answer to me at all. It’s just something you should think about, you know?
Meerkat smiled and gave the Alpha female a moment to process that before adding,
It’s hard to put yourself first. It feels selfish, especially if anyone expresses disappointment or, worse, gets hurt in the process. I’m speaking from my own experience, deciding to go be with Njord. But I know it’s what’s best for me and the life I want to live.
RE: raise your shoes - Lane - February 21, 2022
Lane considered everything for a long moment, and she decided that Meerkat was right. She couldn't answer right away. But it was helpful to know that her position was understandable.
"Thanks. I think it will take some consideration, like you said. Maybe I'll see what things are like, after the move.." Lane was having a hard time making a decision because she struggled to conceptualize her options, given that she had no idea what life would look like for her in the coming months. She'd never had a very good imagination.
The rest of Meerkat's words sank in, and the corner of Lane's mouth twitched upward in her characteristic half-smile.
"I'm glad you're following your heart." She leaned forward to bump Meerkat's shoulder with her own. "And I will miss you," she repeated. She wanted to say that she would come visit and meet Njord, but that felt like over-promising, given that she could hardly keep up with her responsibilities with all four feet here in the packlands.
Instead, she merely sighed, a bittersweet expression on her features as she regarded Meerkat, knowing their conversation-- and Meerkat's time with Duskfire Glacier-- had come to a close.
RE: raise your shoes - Meerkat - February 21, 2022
Lane’s sigh marked the end of an era. Meerkat offered her a small smile of understanding, then moved in for a quick hug. When she stepped back, she followed it up with a gentle nudge.
Thinking of the woman’s son, she said,
We’ll meet again someday, I’m sure of it.Meerkat couldn’t imagine never seeing Veteran or his mother again.
Until then, take care of yourself, Lane. And don’t forget to follow your heart.