@Sialuk

Sometimes Kausiut's dreamworld took her to places she had not been in the real life. When her mind had exhausted the snowy landscapes of mountains and the sandy shores of the ocean and stopped to create new abstract images out of both, she was taken to a place, where full darkness reigned, save for the bluish-green network of lights above her head.

They looked very much like Aurora, but the feeling was different. Kau felt drawn to the image, but so far she had not been able to find a path that would lead her up. When awake - like now - she tried to reconstruct the scene, by attempting to draw the lines in the snow the way Sandulf had taught her. But nothing she created looked anything like the grandeur of the dream-world. Yet she did not give up on trying. It felt important for some reason. And there was little else she could entertain herself with, while healing.

It was not easy to persuade Kausiut to try out something new. She was a creature of habit and every action she decided to take was well-thought through, pragmatic and purposeful. She liked to dedicate her full attention to it and did not take kindly, when someone interrupted her, because it took her time to refocus and adjust to the new situation.

Therefore, when she attempted to draw the lines the way she remembered them seeing, she had completely shut out the world around her. It stopped existing, all there was the white plane and her clumsy attempts at making at least some sort of likeness. So, it was no wonder she did not notice Sialuk's arrival, nor did she hear her inquiry. She continued to work, until something else distracted her, making her to lift up her chin and face the familiar wolf before her.

"Sistraa," she greeted her with a somewhat confused look, but a friendly wag of her tail to acknowledge both the presence and the acceptance of the uninvited company.

Kausiut shook her head in response. No, Walrus hunters had done great many things, but drawing had not been among them. When the wolves there were not busy surviving and saving energy for the next hunt, they sung and chanted mournful songs and swapped stories among them. The crippled girl had joined the choir and fallen asleep with the chatter of their voices in the background.

"Sandulf," she called the wolf, who had shown her this, by name. Perhaps, Sialuk knew him and could draw her own conclusions. "Home?" she asked, wondering, whether her sister had come to stay for good or did she plan to leave again.

"Hurt?" Kausiut asked, not understanding, what Sialuk had meant by healing. Her sister looked fine, perhaps, there was someone else that needed tending for. "Many?" she asked the next thing, wondering about the size of Moonspear and the people she had gathered. Maybe there were people from other villages that Kukutux knew? Maybe there were those similar to Walrus hunters with whom Kausiut had had good connection with.

Kausiut did not understand, why would Sialuk describe an inanimate object as scarred. The living got hurt and healed, and got scars. Stones were not capable of feeling or emotion, they just existed. And often at her worst, she thought that without these two characteristics her life would be easier as well.

As for staying or going elsewhere - Kau had thought of this, but she was bound to the village by the practicality of it. There were only few terrains a wolf of her stature could survive in. Life in Moonglow was like having a pair of practical shoes that were neither pretty, nor you liked them very much. But they kept your feet warm, they were waterproof and comfortable. Same with Walrus hunters. As long as her friend Murre had been around, it had been easier to forget the look of those shoes. After her death - practicality was not enough for Kausiut to stay.

She shrugged in response. Rodyn had mentioned that he and Samani planned to branch out. If she were to leave - it felt likely that it would be in their company. "Food," she told Sialuk, meaning that Moonglow kept her alive. She would be a burden anywhere else. She would become a burden once her parents ceased to reign here. "Safe," as much as she hated to admit it, her very existence was dependant on them. Would be so forever.

Frankly speaking Kausiut was not much up for walks. Her leg and back ached. On the other hand she had already spent far too much time in the same surroundings - tall trees did not grow any less depressing than they already were. When Sialuk left, she would have more than enough time to spend with her own thoughts and imagination. Walk would probably do her good. Even if it would tire her out to the point that she would sleep without any dreams. Which... all things considered, was also a welcome option.


Kausiut got to her feet (she used to sit down and shift weight away from her crooked paw the moment she was done greeting other people) and waited for her sister to lead the way and continue with the conversation.

Kausiut had the same issues with the word "joy" as she did with "fun". Neither word was enough to describe, what it had been like to live with Walrus hunters. Looking back it had not been so much about liking to be among them than having it easier to fit in and be around them. They were people, who valued work and effort more than words. Your value lied in your usefulness to the group and the resourcefulness in staying alive. Rituals and religion were treated more as an entertainment for a rare leisurely moment. A simple, straightforward, uncomplicated existence.

Yet after Murre's death Kau had discovered that the environment was not quite enough to fill the sadness that had settled in her heart after her friend's passing. And she had been sharp enough to realize that with the winter approaching, she would not be granted any favours. In Moonglow, if nothing else, she did have some standing as the leader's daughter. "Weak," she gestured to herself with her paw. "Live.Not." No place for the weaklings there.

Safe - yes. Was she happy though? Kausiut did not know. She was still in the middle of figuring out, whether she was in a position of demanding anything more out life than a simple, existence. At the very core - she very much liked to live, despite life being absurdly hard for her. On the other hand - shelter kept you warm, food kept you from dying and you found yourself trapped in this for - God knew, how long.

She would happily change something, were she aware of, what that thing could be. For she had seen very little of the world and her disability kept her from discovering it. How much of novel things you can find every day within that square mile she lived in daily? Same trees, same paths, only packmates, who crossed the area changed occasionally. Days could pass, however, without her meeting anyone at all.

Sialuk seemed eager and ready to leave. Kausiut would have gladly asked her about the bones and stones that had helped her sister to talk with the gods, but she respected other people's wishes not to talk for long. She knew only too well, how tired one felt after lengthy conversations.

"Yes," she simply replied and dipped her muzzle politely in a farewell.