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Lion Head Mesa But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Printable Version

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But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 07, 2023

set while Killdeer is visiting dad!

Her time in Akashingo was as interesting a distraction as she imagined she could have found.  She wasn’t sure what Germanicus’ experience had been like, but Fennec found (to her surprise) that elements of it suited her.

The place was a maze of unfamiliar territory, but she was never out of earshot of a willing escort.  She could explore the palace fully without worrying about getting lost or stumbling into a dangerous situation, and she took advantage of it as much as she could.  She wasn’t sure the ones Makono ordered to serve her enjoyed doing it, but that also wasn’t her concern.  If they didn’t then they shouldn’t answer her calls… nothing was keeping them there.

It was a different world.  Fennec prized the independence she’d won through pure determination, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy the break constant accompaniment at her beck and call offered.

And there was a bath.  She’d found it the second day and was enjoying it again now.  The water was warm, unlike any she’d ever been in, and she was curious how it stayed that way.  The servant who accompanied her here didn’t seem to know, and she could tell they’d vanished just after answering, leaving her alone to relax.  (Never alone, though.  She could hear others nearby, always watching and within distance). 

A few more days, maybe, before that gets annoying.  She murmured to herself with a smirk, then submerged her head under the pool.  Total silence was a novelty but it also gave room to think.  She’d have enough of that when she left.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Aquillius - March 07, 2023

Making the briefest of assumptions that these two would have known/known of each other since they were in the same pack! LMK if that’s not kosher <3

That voice, that scent.

Familiar.

Too familiar.

Aquillius couldn’t avoid her forever. It simply would not be polite, even if he did feel like her marriage to his father was a slight against his mother.

His father had married her, but the woman in the baths had agreed.

So, he was stiff, yet formal when he entered the room, his tongue glued to the roof of his mouth and his entire body locked at the joints.

What could he even say? Do? She was here and yet she wasn’t supposed to be. She was supposed to be giving his father a new son, one who was a good one, one who did not fail.

In the end, he settled for a little cough to alert her to his presence, and a short, clipped greeting.

Lady Fennec.

His heartbeat quickened.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 07, 2023

Oh, well this was a surprise. Not entirely a welcome one when she was trying to get a break from…. basically everything those two words brought slamming back.

Lady Fennec. No one had called her that until Mereo. She had tolerated it then and tensed at it now.

Interesting choice, coming here. So leaving was personal. She said dryly, without bothering to leave the water. It didn’t matter that she was a visitor and he apparently lived here. Germanicus would be broken if he found out his son had joined this place and not told him, but that only increased her amusement. Maybe he’d learn something from it. But it wasn’t like he would be finding it out from her.

She didn’t owe him anything. If his son wanted to hide from him, that was his decision.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Aquillius - March 07, 2023

His ears flattened.

If you may call a bobcat “personal”. A crack against his already flailing shield arm, a bare miss.

His heartbeat rabbited away.

I came here once I healed. As I would have done eventually. He remembered, in the vaguest of terms, the palace guard rotations. He stiffened his posture, rolled his weight off his shoulder.

He did not think himself welcome back in Mereo.

I abandoned my post. I am making up for it.

I’m making my father proud, he thought desperately to himself. A mantra as worn into his brain as a canyon.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 07, 2023

She didn’t buy it, but she snorted rather than argue. Maybe it wasn’t personal that he was leaving, but it had to be that he hadn’t sent word. Germanicus had been affected heavily by his departure and disappearance, though maybe only Fennec could have noticed.

He would learn or he would continue to lose the ones he cared about. Unless the one he was with now was the only one that had ever actually applied to.

Well, you’re in luck. There’s no post to make up for anymore. The General has gone ranging, and the rest of us get to find something else to do with our time. The only real trace of bitterness was inlaid in the title. The rest she said casually, as if she were telling a friend about an acquaintance and not a son that his father and home were gone. There was a reason she’d never signed up to be a messenger.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Aquillius - March 07, 2023

thump thump thump

It was silent.

For just a beat, it was silent. He hadn’t heard her right, he didn’t, he couldn’t.

He suddenly, violently, wanted to lunge forward. His teeth itched to do it, to turn fang on the hurt as if it would drive it out. He could feel the motions it would take. Every step, every muscle that would twitch and move, the crane of his jaw and the fur beneath his tongue.

He shook in place with the want to do just that.

He what?

Thump thump thump thump

Every breath was painful to take. His heart felt like it would explode.

Wh…where is my father.

In that moment, Aquillius had never felt more like a child.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 07, 2023

Now he was upset? Fennec felt her amusement turn to annoyance in an instant. She could hear it in his voice, and then he had the gall to ask her where the father he’d fucking left took off to.

Too fucking bad that he hadn’t bothered to share that little detail.

I don’t know. He didn’t bother to tell me where he was going, probably because he wasn’t interested in his ex-wife coming with. He’s your family now, not mine. Her tone grew sharper as the words took on fangs. If he’d cared, he could have sent word. He could have come back ages ago. Instead he’d let himself likely become part of the reason they were in this mess.

That was false, and unfair, but she didn’t care.

If you suddenly care, then go find him yourself.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Aquillius - March 08, 2023

She didn’t know.

Perhaps that was what hurt the most, until her next statement. Aquillius’s teeth clacked closed, then they were bared, ivory grinding against ivory as he ground his jaw together.

I stayed away because i cared. You were supposed to give him something better. He took an aggressive step forward, the fur on his hackles spiked, a bitter, disbelieving rage curling against his ribs.

He itched to do it. To lunge.

He didn’t, but it was a bare thing.

He quivered in place.

How dare you accuse me of not caring. She sat before him throwing words like she had ever understood him, like she had ever tried. Aquillius had done all he could to make his father proud of him, to make him happy, and stepping away to let him have his new life and new family was all for that.

His legs were shaking.

He did not believe her. Her mouth only spewed lies.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 08, 2023

She relished the sound of his fury, the way her words clearly hit home. In her bitterness she wanted to know someone out there was as angry as she was. If he attacked she would be at the disadvantage, still in the water and unwilling to get out to face him. But she didn’t stop.

Her lip curled and she growled. Clearly he didn’t want me. He left me, just like your mother left him. Don’t fucking pretend any of what you’re doing was for his own good. We didn’t even know if you were dead. You’re a coward who’s hiding.

She was scathing, barely containing the anger that was inspired by his statement. There was never an instance being left behind had been better for her, but everyone who did it seemed to think it. How fucking dare they, and how fucking dare he. All it was was cowardice. He couldn’t face his father so he chose to break his heart instead.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Aquillius - March 08, 2023

Dont you even dare MENTION her!

Aquillius seethed, both from the mention of his mother and the blow to his pride.

The ground she walked on wasn’t even cold yet when you swooped in. His single eye was narrow pupiled, the world spinning to a singular point.

The stupid, smug face of the bitter word spitting witch.

Calpurnia goads you, Brutus

He found himself at the edge of the pools.

Why are you even here?!

Haunting his life like a great winged chorus.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 08, 2023

Fennec wouldn’t be dissuaded. This boy knew nothing about her. She was my family way before she was yours. Don’t pretend like I’m some kind of monster. Germanicus asked me, and unlike you, I know she wouldn’t care.

That was partially a lie, but her glare didn’t betray any lack of confidence. She didn’t know if Ruenna would have cared, but she did know that she wouldn’t have a right to. She could have come back at any moment and I’d have stepped aside. She didn’t.

I’m here because Akashingo deserved to know Mereo is gone. She owed him no further explanation than that. Makono’s blessing was all that mattered, and his presence here didn’t affect any of it. He deserved no more or less than any of the wolves here. She doubted he would have the courage to look for his father now.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Aquillius - March 08, 2023

His answer was a snort.

She was my mother. Came the almost sulky reply, before he hissed through his teeth.

I was not aware you could not listen. Full of unexpected venom, in a way he did not know he could be.

Your message could have been given in five minutes at most. So why do you linger. Like a bad odor, like a vengeful spirit.

He would not suffer a moment longer with her. 

He did not know what to do when duty was done, but it obviously was. In his head, he began to frantically draft new orders, whatever he could think of. Find his father, drown the woman in front of him, march into the mountains. He needed it, needed those orders to function.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 08, 2023

He was a child. She wouldn’t deign his first defensive snap with a response. Mother or not, she’d left him too. She could understand his anger but she wouldn’t wear the blame.

The only one I owe that to is your Pharaoh. You don’t deserve anything from me. The words were too harsh but she wouldn’t take them back. He could have been a son to her if he hadn’t assumed her a homewrecker, and now that his father had done her wrong he thought he deserved consideration.

She didn’t have the patience or the time for it.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Aquillius - March 08, 2023

His ears went flat to his skull.

Makono, then. If the witch was here, it was by her word.

He glared at the woman who could have become a mother to him, the one he’d never actually given a chance to, and his lip raised into a harsh curl.

He snapped his teeth, once, then turned with a dramatic flare of his tail. He wouldn’t play this back and forth anymore. He wouldn’t stay here and yell back and forth with a mirror that only showed him his own stubbornness.

He paused at the doorway.

May you drown.

Then, he was gone down the hall, back to his quarters, where he would seethe in silence.


RE: But the roses were only to drain my inspiration - Fennec - March 08, 2023

Fennec didn’t speak as he left. The final threat shouldn’t have felt like the victory it did. A part of her simmered with satisfaction. Let him hate her.

She was done with disloyalty. She was done with wolves who thought love was leaving and family meant not even bothering to try. She would keep the ones worthwhile close to her and fuck the rest of them.

Family didn’t abandon each other, and they sure as hell didn’t disappear without a word. No matter how far she went, her parents would know where she was, and if @Figment ever came back she would never pull that shit again. Regardless of if he decided to forgive her, because at this point she knew more than ever she didn’t deserve it.

Let him run. She was never running again. Fennec settled back into the water, listening to the sounds around her and letting her thoughts wander on the possibilities in store.