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+--- Thread: Ocean's Breath Plateau 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time (/showthread.php?tid=63406)
'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Marina - November 10, 2024
Forward dated! I'll set a date when I have a brain
Tullik had gone.Marina's own grief was a quiet thing, her eyes dry, her chin held high even as her mouth sometimes trembled to think of her sister-wife; gone. A part of herself had gone too, Marina thought, and a part of @Chakliux.
It was for her husband that she remained steady; eternal as the sea, bound to him as the waves were bound to the shore. The promise lingered unspoken on her lips with every kiss. Tullik had gone, but they still had each other; their children; the life they'd built in Moontide.
Still, there were sleepless nights. It was late when Marina turned to her husband on one such night, restless and hopeful that he too would be awake.
Chakliux?Her voice was scarcely more than a whisper. She stretched lazily against him, comforted by his warmth.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Chakliux - November 11, 2024
he had joined with marina in the nights after tullik's leaving, binding with his wife in their shared grief. chakliux marveled at himself, at his ageing; perhaps even a year before he might have considered already thoughts of another wife, in some vague future way.
but this time he was only bereft; heartbroken; marina became the sum of his focus.
an arm tightened around her as she spoke, his cheek turning upon the pillowing pelt to regard marina with attentive silence.
but this time he was only bereft; heartbroken; marina became the sum of his focus.
an arm tightened around her as she spoke, his cheek turning upon the pillowing pelt to regard marina with attentive silence.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Marina - November 11, 2024
I want to leave the plateau,Marina confessed into the darkness, pressing her muzzle into his neck as she added quickly:
Together. All of us. I -
I'm so tired of being sick. And I can't do this without - her -It still hurt to speak her name.
I can't run the lodge alone if I'm always sick. It doesn't matter where we go. Anywhere but here.
Please, she almost said, but lapsed into silence; it pained her to ask this of her husband. It pained her to want it at all. She loved Moontide, owed her life and all that she had to Rodyn and the memory of Samani. Marina had thought once that she would never leave.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Chakliux - November 11, 2024
and though he knew it pained marina, chakliux did not want to hear this. her illness had been of great importance and effort to him. "we cannot leave now, wife," he said quietly. his responsibilities; their children. dutch's own grieving family.
"but you cannot be here with this sickness. nantahala now works. puffin is more than old enough to take your tasks. i will build another lodge in the quiet forest where dutch lived. and i will speak with rodyn."
but more than this? immediacy? it was not within his power, and he was weary to think of it.
chakliux fought his own tension as he waited for marina's response.
"but you cannot be here with this sickness. nantahala now works. puffin is more than old enough to take your tasks. i will build another lodge in the quiet forest where dutch lived. and i will speak with rodyn."
but more than this? immediacy? it was not within his power, and he was weary to think of it.
chakliux fought his own tension as he waited for marina's response.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Marina - November 11, 2024
Her hurt was a vast and sudden thing. For a moment Marina thought she might speak; had she not given enough to this marriage, this lodge, this family? For Chakliux she had become third wife, then second, and now — now it was only her, sickened as she was, and now he spoke that he would sooner send her to live in solitude than grant this request.
Marina fell quiet, withdrawing from her husband in tearful silence, and would not speak again. Bitterly she thought to herself that if he truly loved her, he would never have suggested such; he would have remembered that Dutch's forest was the setting of all of her nightmares. Hurt burning quickly into anger, she turned away and arranged herself to sleep. Chakliux had made his decision. There was nothing more to say.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Chakliux - November 11, 2024
"marina," for as her anger filled the lodge he felt he should indeed speak. "i will bring our things there myself." it had not occurred to him to send her away; had he known her mind he would have castigated himself for his lack of clarity.
she was silent, but he did not believe she was asleep. or perhaps that was his own projection. "rodyn will understand."
the pain of tullik's turned back appeared between them, straining. their children were almost grown. why did he stay? in the darkness he turned toward her, pleading in his touch. "you are hurt."
she was silent, but he did not believe she was asleep. or perhaps that was his own projection. "rodyn will understand."
the pain of tullik's turned back appeared between them, straining. their children were almost grown. why did he stay? in the darkness he turned toward her, pleading in his touch. "you are hurt."
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Marina - November 11, 2024
Our things. The realization of her misunderstanding was swift, and on the heels of it came the shattering of a second revelation: that she no longer trusted her husband to choose her above others. And perhaps this was her own fault. Marina didn't know.
The breath left her lungs all at once, and she turned to bury her face in Chakliux's chest fur with a halting sob.
I thought -Her voice broke under the tears she could no longer hold back.
I thought you wanted me to go alone.
I'm sorry. I'm so scared to lose you, too,The confession fell from her lips unbidden, wavering.
Tullik was all I had while you were away.But it was more than that; she'd loved Tullik, though she'd never dared to say it. Surely Chakliux knew. Surely he understood that his was not the only heart broken by this loss.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Chakliux - November 11, 2024
in sorrow, in relief he held her, kissing softly the fur over her pretty muzzle, her eartips; in the darkness his own tears came and he grew hoarse. "you will not lose me until the day ice raven says my soul must fly with him," he whispered fiercely.
at last the truth came to him; chakliux nestled marina's head beneath his chin. "i feel i cannot leave because — this is where the three of us built our home. where our children were born. that we will both lose more of her," he said softly.
"but we cannot live that way. you cannot. i cannot."
"so we will live apart, you and i together. and i will speak with rodyn about joining him as first warrior and moving from this place." and he saw now that if moontide remained upon the plateau, then for the sake of his wife he would form a new home.
they were builders, he and marina.
at last the truth came to him; chakliux nestled marina's head beneath his chin. "i feel i cannot leave because — this is where the three of us built our home. where our children were born. that we will both lose more of her," he said softly.
"but we cannot live that way. you cannot. i cannot."
"so we will live apart, you and i together. and i will speak with rodyn about joining him as first warrior and moving from this place." and he saw now that if moontide remained upon the plateau, then for the sake of his wife he would form a new home.
they were builders, he and marina.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Marina - November 11, 2024
Her heart surged with its own joy and grief; you and I together. Nothing could truly soothe the wound left by Tullik's absence — but in Chakliux she had always found the strength to go on, the steadiness to carve the path forward. That had not changed. It would not change.
Some of her will always live in our hearts,She murmured, mouth soft against his throat.
In our children. Maybe one day our grandchildren will live in our lodge at the plateau, and tell our stories to their children.
A pretty picture of the future, of a family that would only continue to grow. But here and now it was only the two of them and their children and their plans; and this, too, was a comforting thought in its way.
I won't doubt you again,Marina promised.
You and I, together. Always.
RE: 'Cause everything I feel is a waste of time - Chakliux - November 12, 2024
he wept again, silently; he held her and thought for the first time in a long while of nasamik. this was not the same; she had disappeared and never come back. it was almost more painful, the waiting, though knowing tullik would possibly not return as well opened a new hurt inside chakliux.
"i will continue to earn the trust you put in me."
their futures lay as one, together.
"if sirmiq marries this sunshine girl nantahala, maybe he will inherit this lodge," he smiled despite himself in the dark. "or! if raiyuk will settle," he joked. "grandchildren." what a dream, one of hope.
"i will continue to earn the trust you put in me."
their futures lay as one, together.
"if sirmiq marries this sunshine girl nantahala, maybe he will inherit this lodge," he smiled despite himself in the dark. "or! if raiyuk will settle," he joked. "grandchildren." what a dream, one of hope.