"I know what you mean," he commented in reply to his brother's thoughts. He trusted Peregrine's assessment more than his own; Peregrine, after all, was closest to Osprey out of all of them. Atticus adored his sister, but he and Osprey never really had that "spark" or "connection" that he'd seen between her and Perry. It was okay, of course. He harbored no jealousy. Each one of them had their place in one another's world, and Atticus still had a good relationship with her.

"It sucks. Everything feels so incomplete. But…at least she'll be okay." He bumped Perry's shoulder companionably, appreciating once more the miracle that had brought them together here in this place so far from home. It was better to have an incomplete family than no family at all. Tyrannus is a dick and a half – in fact, he's a whole lot of dicks. He's a whole friggin' forest of big, throbbing, gross dicks. But only to us. He'll be good to Oss."

After a moment of consideration, he continued, "I tried to get to her, you know." He glanced at Perry's face, wondering if he too had tried. Or had Tyrannus been more aggressive with this bolder brother of theirs? "After he ran me out. I took my time, circled back around to the packlands. I…I didn't want her to think we just up and left her, y'know?" His brow was furrowed, almost troubled, as he spoke, as if he recalled a bad dream he didn't like to think about. "I almost made it. But he caught me and…well, kicked my ass." He still bore some of the bruises and cuts from the fight with Tyrannus. He rolled his shoulders as if to shrug them away.

He nodded in response to Peregrine's comments on their sister, not really knowing what else to say. He hoped that Osprey would come, but that was the best he could do — hope. She didn't know they'd been thrown out. He was sure Tyrant Ass wouldn't straight-up tell her that he'd thrown her brothers out of the pack; Atticus imagined he'd come up with some bullshit story to feed to her, probably paint them all to look like traitors and cowards or something. And even if she did piece together what had really happened, their trail was bound to be weathered away and nearly gone by now. Was it even realistic to hope that she might find her way to them? Atticus was nothing if not a realist, sometimes, and right now, his inner realist was telling him that the odds were pretty grim.

There was always that hope, though.

Peregrine swiftly changed the subject, and delivered to Atticus news that was probably supposed to be good. But it wasn't. It hit him like a poisoned arrow to the heart, embedding itself deeply in the aching tissue and festering there. Goddammit, he thought to himself, swallowing a thick lump in his throat and grimacing. Every fucking time. Somehow, whenever he developed feelings for someone, he always ended up being the loser. There was definitely chemistry between him and the peculiar Alpha, but he guessed he'd never have a chance to find out where it led. "That's cool," he said, a ball of ice burning deep in his stomach. "Good for you, man." His plastered a smile on his face and did his best to breathe false cheer into his voice.

Peregrine gushed on, seemingly oblivious to the pain he inflicted upon his brother with each ruthless twisting of the knife he had callously planted in Atticus's chest. His heart burned and howled as if literally stabbed, toxic fingers of cold anger and hopeless desolation creeping outward from the wound. Tears of bitterness and betrayal might have stung his eyes if he had not been so preoccupied with holding back the vast thunderheads of rage he felt building within him with each word that came out of Peregrine's mouth. He prattled on and on, words raining upon him unheard and tumbling loosely away like arrows bouncing off the side of a warship. Frozen fire simmered behind pale blue eyes and his mouth was dry with the heat of his temper.

"No," he replied, his voice hollow. He felt like he was drowning. Suddenly he wanted to be alone. "Thanks, but I don't...want anybody else." Too late he realized the "else" he had let slip, but he doubted his brother was astute enough to notice the implications of that word.

Through the black tunnel of his anger, he caught on to a subtle thing – his brother had only said they were courting. He had not said they were mated. In his own words, he had only "almost bagged" the Alpha female. He held this idea close in his mind, like a child holds a firefly in his enclosed hands, close to his heart, peering in at it cautiously lest it fly out between his fingers and be lost forever.

A fleeting sense of panic raced through him as his brother figured it out, but it was quickly replaced by anger as Peregrine rambled on about a new life and happiness after having everything ripped away from him. Did he think he was the only one of them who had suffered, who had lost? He had lost his home, his family, his sister too. Crete had lost Osprey and their mother and the Falcons too. Did Peregrine for one second think he was special? Did he seriously expect Atticus to rejoice at having a girl he'd been interested in swiped right out from under him like this?

He wanted so badly to spit these words at Peregrine, to make his brother understand how he felt, even just a little bit. But he didn't have the balls to do it. He'd never been much for confrontation. He wasn't as brazen and fearless as Peregrine was. He was a chicken-shit. Maybe it was better that Perry and Hawkeye hook up. No Alpha wanted to be with a loser who couldn't even stand up to his brother.

"No!" he protested, shaking his head. Another fake smile. "No," he assured his brother, though his pale blue eyes were strained as he glanced at Perry. "It's okay. It's…it's fine. I haven't known her that long anyway." The more he thought about it, now, the less he could understand why he was so attracted to her to begin with. He really hadn't known her that long at all. He didn't realize that it was purely hormones driving him, not so much his heart. But it still stung, to be the loser before ever even having a chance. "She is hot though, isn't she?" He flashed another empty grin, trying to lighten the situation and take the pressure off of himself.

It would be fine, he told himself. Everything would be fine. It wasn't the first time he'd lost an opportunity at love, and it wouldn't be the last. He barely knew Hawkeye, didn't even know her surname or where she was from or what her favorite kind of meat was or…anything, really. The woman he lusted after was just that – a woman he lusted after. The more he reminded himself of this, the easier it was to accept things as they were. In her presence, of course, it was different. It was so hard to be reasonable and think with his upper head when he was shipwrecked, adrift and lost, in the tide of her intoxicating pheromones.

So a little genuine warmth crept into his previously empty smile, and a tiny bit of light kindled in his eyes, as he began to forgive his brother. The friendship and comaraderie they shared, and the ridiculous jokes that quickly resumed between them, helped a great deal. If things could just stay the way they were, Atticus could deal with Peregrine being a mated man. Of course, right now, he didn't put two and two together that by becoming Hawkeye's mate, Peregrine would become her Alpha male. That would be a huge problem for Atticus, but he didn't know that yet. He didn't make the connection between mate and rank.

For now, the brothers shared a hug, and Atticus laughed with a mixture of mock horror and genuine amusement at Peregrine's feigned declaration of gay love for his brother. Atti placed a forepaw companionably on Perry's shoulders and, gesturing…downward with his pale eyes, commented, "Just keep…that…away from me, 'sall I ask. I already have a colossal shlong that drags the ground behind me. I don't need another one." His face lit up in a wicked grin, the evil, mischievous gleam reserved exclusively for his brothers creeping into his eyes. There was no wound that penis jokes couldn't heal.