Dragoncrest Cliffs they forget that i am the daughter of two kings, not one

i am not awake yet so if this post is poop i am sorry.

the morning is heavy laden with fog, thick and dense as it settles over the forest of dragoncrest cliffs. blodreina finishes up her patrol — as much as she desired to stick strictly to the western borders she starts with the eastern borders, knowing that she will patrol her way to the west later on in the day — and settles her thoughts upon her rumbling stomach. a plump rabbit from one of the caches will tide her over for a few hours. she wants to see heda ...wants to check up on the commander. with wildfire and some of her children's decision to leave coupled with the fact of the pack that settled on the sound and their recent march on drakru's home leaves blodreina to worry about her.

she is heda and she is no doubt strong — the strongest of them, blodreina would be the first to argue — but it all has to be taking a toll on her. on her way to seek out the commander she comes across a plump groundhog and takes it down with little trouble. with the still-warm carcass grasped betwixt her jaws blodreina continues out her path, unsure if she'll find heda in hougeda or if she'd also be awake so early ( blodreina often has to remind herself that just because she has an aversion to hougeda simply because she's claustrophobic does not mean everyone else does too ).

blodreina makes her way to the enterance of hougeda figuring it was as good a place as any to begin her search for @Antumbra.

Once, she’d through without Wildfire, she’d move on and everything would be the same. She’d occupy her free time into something else, into Drageda and the others, but after all that has happened, there’s still a weird emptiness she’s had a hard time explaining (not that she’s told anyone) but something heavy in her chest that no healer is going to be able to fix. As much as she’s divvied up her time into other things, there’s still not enough to cover up the hole left by her family.

If she’d never allowed the space in the first place, it wouldn’t be like this. She’s certain of it. She’d been taught aversion to such actions and now that she’s allowed it, she isn’t sure she can close it back up for good.

Antumbra stretches, pulling from a lazy morning in the depths of Hougeda. Most mornings she’s up-and-at-em but something keeps her rooted in her spot. A waft of blood catches up to her and she jerks to attention, locating it toward the entrance and dangling by the jaws of Blodreina. Her brows knit together and she shifts, stands, and shakes out her fur.

“Hei,” she calls once she’s settled.

heda emerges just as blodreina goes to make her entrance and blodreina retreats a few steps to give her commander some space. she sets the groundhog at her paws and swipes her salmon pink tongue across her jowls once to clean them as heda greets her. hey, blodreina returns the greeting with a respectful dip of her head. i brought this for you. she gestures down to the fresh kill with her muzzle and bows her head to nudge it towards the woman. it was a small gift and not necessarily one that heda had to accept. if antumbra didn't want it blodreina figures that it could go to one of the caches.

for a moment, blodreina feels a bit awkward...because she isn't sure what to say. she isn't sure what's safe to talk about and what might upset heda. surely, prying in the fact that wildfire left with a good chunk of drakru's children ( including heda's own ) was a huge no-no. not that blodreina'd ever been the prying type. how're you doing? it sounded like the typical version of the question but the words beneath it meant how are you holding up?. blodreina knew she hadn't taken kendra's death well at all. and the single advantage to that had been that they hadn't known one another and been lovers as wildfire and antumbra'd been. they hadn't had children. sure. wildfire hadn't died ...but somehow blodreina wonders if that made it hurt worse.

how're tux and silkie doing? she inquires after what is left of the commander's children next. the truth is, blodreina isn't good at comfort, at trying to offer it and she sure as hell never wants it herself. a heavy sigh follows. i'm not going to pry and i understand if you don't want to talk about what happened while we were in trigeda but if you ever do want or need to talk i'll listen. i guess... i'm just worried about you. not that heda wasn't strong because she was definitely one of the strongest wolves blodreina knew ( and looked up to ) but that didn't mean she didn't and couldn't have moments — and blodreina only worried because she cared.

Antumbra dips her head to acknowledge the kill, leaning forward to grab it and pull it out of the way and she offers quiet thanks in return. When she looks back, she sees the same worried looks she’s seen on Gyda before. It doesn’t hold the same affection as her mother but the woman is like family and so a smile flickers upon her face. She is one of the few original that remain, alongside Dio. The kru she reigns seems so different than she’s used to now that she doesn’t have Wildfire or Portia anymore.

“I’m okay,” she offers with a sweep of her tail. She gestures her friend out of the entry to sit down out of the way. She moves the kill with them. “They’re okay, too. They have a few wounds Rose is taking care of from the invasion,” she explains.

Blodreina offers her a shoulder to cry on, should she need it, but Antumbra shakes her head. She appreciates the gesture and it means more to her coming from her longtime friend than some of the others but she doesn’t need to rely on anyone else. If anything, this is a battle only she can face.

“There is nothing to be worried about,” Antumbra assures. “When Artaax came back, he told me where they were—where I thought they would go—but I don’t think they’ll come back this way.” The last wolf she wants to see is Wildfire, unsure where things will fall in the rollercoaster of her strife.

following heda's gesture blodreina takes a seat out of the entrance way of hougeda, offering the commander her full attention as she begins to respond to the gona's question. blodreina isn't the type to pry and will accept whatever the commander wants to share — and truthfully, she is not all that into offering emotional support but mostly because she finds it all messy and complicated — good. blodreina replies. i hope rose recovers quickly. it feels a little awkward but only because she doesn't know rose hardly at all. regardless, the girl is drakru and that is all the reason that blodreina needs to offer words to a speedy recovery.

heda dispels the need for worry, assuring blodreina as much and there is a twitch of the gona's ear and a solemn nod. she would try not to worry though she suspects that it's not so easy to turn off. she knows, in the marrow of her bones, that her commander is more than capable of facing her own personal war by herself ...but she doesn't have to alone, if she doesn't want to. blodreina has the wrong idea about relationships, admittedly. though her parents worked out well enough and seem happy together losing kendra and watching heda lose wildfire and two of her youngest children has frozen blodreina's heart to the idea of love. from what she's seen of it: it's fleeting. it lasts only when the going is good and when things get too hard it is like the coward that runs away.

maybe, in some cruel respects, this is what she thinks of wildfire as: a coward. she is sorry but only because she assumes it hurts heda. it is probably better that they don't. because they have abandoned drakru and there is no forgiveness for that in blodreina's eyes. there never has been ...and there never will be. it is one of the things that she's always stood resolutely behind; regardless of what it cost her.

the pair talk for a bit longer until eventually they part ways ...with blodreina unknowing that this was the last full conversation she'd ever have with her commander. if she would have known she'd have stretched it out longer. asked different questions. but that occurrence and those regrets would come later.