Stone Circle I can feel it on my tongue

SETTING:Stone Circle
Weather:Sunny
Warm
Midday
TERRITORY: Stone Circle
TAGS:@Valette

He had to tell her.
He had to break the news.

It had been a few days since he had shown up with Valour, fur wiped and strewn along with wounds. Thankfully they had begun to heal and could now move around as he used to.

He found his mother up on stone circle, and looked tentatively at the invisible border that surrounded the inner ring. The damn thing always made him uncomfortable, he couldn't really understand why. It was the air he guesses —weird.

"Mom?" He called, a little uncertain as he waited for her to notice him.

Valette had been at the Stone Circle, though she wasn't here as often anymore since Nanook's children were born. She realized she wasn't having pups this year, and she had opted in, into helping her sister raise them where she could. At this time however, she would give Nanook and Sia some space with their children and would watch the bison herd. It had been a long time since she had watched them and it would give her valuable intel.

She turned her ear to the sound, realizing it was Clay that came to seek her out. The matriarch turned and walked towards him. He was always uneasy about the Circle, even now, he looked uncomfortable. She always wondered why the boy felt that way towards the stones. Valette greeted him with a smile though. "Hi, Clay," she greeted. Her hazel green eyes traveling over the boy, seeing that his wounds were looking better. "I am glad to see that you look better," she complimented her son. She wanted to ask what was wrong but decided against that and wait patiently for what he wanted to ask or tell her.

She was watching the bison again; She always did that. He didn't understand the appeal of it—watching the massive prey roam around before ultimately deciding to kill one.

Weird.

"Um... Yes." He offered in a quiet voice as he fidgeted. "Thank you." He added hastily, not wanting to seem odd or disrespectful. He didn't want to sour the moment and make his mother's temper worse, he could feel she was a bit sad lately. For what reason? He didn't know.

Stepping into the circle with a bowed head he took a seat beside her, watching down below and sharing her company. He never did this.

It was a first; Sitting beside his mother as a son ought to.

"I'm leaving."

Valette wished Clay wasn't so awkward around her, it was like he was walking on eggshells around her. She glanced over him as he stepped closer. When he sat down beside her, she went to sit back down too. This was actually nice. She did this with West all the time, but not with Clay. A soft smile turned on her lips as she watched the territory. She liked this. Though then Clay spoke again, and the mother's face fell instantly. A frown came upon her face, followed by more sadness. At least he was kind enough to her to come to tell her in person.

"Are you going to live with Valour?," she asked, out of curiosity mostly. They seemed to be good friends, even though-- Well, nevermind. She could tell that Clay had not been happy here at Easthollow. So why force him to say? She was still looking straight ahead. She was still not looking at him. With Clay, she always felt the most awful mother. He hadn't the easiest child. "Can I ask you something?," she voiced. Her pause didn't take too long because she would be afraid she would never voice it again. "What did I do wrong? Is there something I did or said?" Her face now turning to Clay, clearly holding back the tears. She blamed her previous emotions for reacting this way.

He wouldn't dare to look at his mother.
He couldn't stand it; Not when her voice was so filled with solum.

"What? Of course not. I would never live with that stupid, handsome, idiot," The boy huffed, feeling his blood boil. Him? In Nightwalkers? With Valour? "That bone head doesn't even listen to me. And his packmates are insufferable." Especially that Clarence and Santiago couple. Everyone there was nosy, the land smelled of bog, and it was far too dark and shady for him to live happily.

"I'm thinking of going to that empire Ira spoke of... R-Ren something." He muttered, looking down at his paws. He didn't want to admit to his mother that he had heard her and dad talking with his sister at the border. He had been in the tree line then, near and ducked behind the grove to be out of sight.

But as his mother asked he tilted his head, gazing at her from the side eye and breaking his will. She wasn't looking at him; only at the large expanse of the horizon where the sun was dipping behind clouds. He didn't give her an answer, only an audible gulp. "There was nothing you did wrong." He spoke softly. "You were perfect. You all were."

He felt weird being open and honest with her.

"You all are so happy. You and dad are strong. West is brave. Leta is smart. Newt was... smart too." He hesitated on speaking of his lost brother. "Meanwhile im as Polaris said—moody." He took a few deep breaths to steady himself. "I get into fights, i'm too quick to snap. I was raised in Nightwalkers to kill. I don't belong here."

Valette frowned briefly when Clay called Valour handsome. She had not really seen the male that way, but it was interesting to hear that her son called another male handsome. She had recently learned form Ira that there were males who loved males apparently. She still didn't understand a whole lot about it. It was still baffling. "Handsome?," she questioned at her son, eyeing over him curiously by what he meant by that.

"Reneian Empire?," she asked. It was that sister pack that Ira came to tell them about, the one that was a possible new alliance for them. Valette still needed to go there. Perhaps traveling one day would be nice, if things settled down with Nanook and Siarut. Then the answer from Clay came, which she didn't really expected. "Perfect? Me?" She was confused by that statement from the young male. But then the male continued. Valette listened closely.

"Don't say that about yourself. And you will always belong here because you are part of our family," she reasoned. "But I can understand you don't feel at home here," she commented, looking over her son. "But if I was so perfect I wonder where it went wrong. Before you were taken to the Nightwalkers. There must have been something bothering you that you felt different."

Valette kept her eyes on her son now, as his answer had been surprising. "It is nice, you know. When you talk to me." She admitted to him. She liked that he was sharing things with her now.

The boy ducks his head at the realization of his confession. He loudly sniffs—A cough as well.

Something to break the silence and deflect.

"Handsome? I mean ugly," He scoffs, head held high and lip pouted into a 'hmph.' "But that doesn't matter. Yeah—Reneian Empire," He whispers. He can't stand to look at his mom anymore now that his heart is out in the open, ripped open and bleeding in front of his parent and the sun.

"Yes, perfect. You were caring and kind.  I was just-" He scowled, brows wrinkling as he looked down at his paws. Anger rose in him at the bitter memories, flashes of his siblings doing well. Of him unable to follow along, of the ridicule and harsh snaps of his parents to pay attention. But now a yearling, he understood why. "I was difficult and envious of everyone. I didn't like being told what to do."

A half-truth.

He could feel Valette's gaze on him. Her green eyes akin to him staring him down. He was glad he shared that with her and not his father. He had already inherited Greyback's stupidly thick fur. "It is nice.... Are you mad at me?"

Valette looked at her son with a skeptical gaze. She was pretty sure that he had meant to say handsome. But she was not one to press matters like this. The matriarch was happy to believe that Clay would find a nice girl and would have pups one day, like all wolves would. She dipped her head, if her son was going to live there then they would have an alliance with this pack. She would want to know if they would take good care of her boy.

Valette slowly nodded to show him she was listening, as the male spoke about what he was like as a pup. The mother still wondered why things made him envious or why he didn't like to be told what to do. Maybe it was their tone. Perhaps if she had been less perfect, Clay would be more inclined to express himself. "Regardless of what you think, we both still love you Clay. You shouldn't forget that," she assured him.

His next words made her glad she reminded him that they loved him. "Why would I be mad?," she asked, frowning. "Sure, I don't like you leaving but if it makes you happy I wouldn't stop you. Plus you came to tell me in person instead of running away or leaving without a word. If you are leaving this is my preferred method," she explained to him. She was glad that he showed more maturity.

Clays ear's perked as his mother told him of her love. He knew it was true. Knew both she and his father did, but hearing it said was foreign and made him look down with flattering posture. "I won't," he whispered, agreeing and promising her silently. Love. Such an odd emotion, one he didn't fully understand and hoped in time he would.

But then she frowned and asked him. He anxiously fiddled with his paws, sliding dirt around in a circle and getting them dirty. "Because im leaving you. I know you're upset that Newt left. I know you don't like your kids leaving...I can't promise I'll be happy but if it doesn't work out I will come back."

He still wasn't looking at Valette.

Valette dipped her head, pleased that he wouldn't forget. She would make him remember every time she saw him. She realized she had a lot of love to give, it was just harder when someone was not open to receive it. He answered her question, his gaze casted away from her. "A mother never likes her kids moving away, but that is something for a mother to deal with, not her child," she reminded him. "Not all wolf pups are meant to stay in their birth pack. I've learned that by now."

"You are a good son, Clay," she returned to him. "And this way, being honest. That makes this the best way you could leave. I'd rather have you be honest and tell me you aren't happy here than be too afraid to talk to me. I hope Reneian Empire is what you seek," she then smiled. "Can I at least give you one last snuggle?" she asked.