Redhawk Caldera spirits born from the not happened yet

Eljay didn't really want to leave home at all. He felt anxious stepping over Brecheliant's borders for the first time since they'd named him Auspex, and for the first time since he had become a father. Immediately he thought of all the horrendous things that could happen to him on the way, but he'd already told @Maia that he would go and of course, she couldn't just come with him because she needed to watch the children in his absence. His gut felt twisted in a knot as he headed towards the Caldera's borders. He knew there was no rush because things'd been left well with the Caldera, but he'd kept hearing Teya's words, about how Towhee was wounded and how Ruenna visiting Brecheliant might be tough on them right now. It made him worry, and while he still felt a flare up of stress when he thought of how he had left the Caldera and how suffocating it'd felt to have to take care of them, he also missed them a great deal and cared for them.

So the caretaker set off in the morning. Passing the lake was pretty uneventful, and it put his worries to shame. Still, he couldn't shake the feeling that something bad would happen to him. Eljay felt relieved when he reached Redhawk Caldera's borders without much happening on his way around Lake Rodney. When he reached the Caldera's borders, Eljay lifted his nose to howl for @Ruenna, because he knew that she had said she'd visit Brecheliant. He didn't call for @Towhee or Fennec, though he could tell that their scents were thick on the border, too. Hopefully that meant that Towhee had recovered, but he still didn't want to put extra pressure on her shoulders. And maybe he was a little daunted at the thought of seeing Towhee again, afraid that she hated him for leaving at a tough time.

It would take some time for Ruenna to reach Eljay, given her limp, but hopefully Brecheliant's leader would allow her some grace. He would remember Ruenna's mobility issue, wouldn't he? 

Although the visitor had called for her by name, Ruenna was surprised to come upon him alone at the border, given how much time it had taken her to reach the outskirts of the territory. Ruenna had little doubt that Fennec or @Āzonn were somewhere nearby, standing guard, watching.

Her back pain had been better lately, thanks to her swim sessions in the Caldera's lake, but she was still reluctant to walk down the slope of the Caldera. Downhill was the worst for her. Instead, she welcomed Eljay up the hill to his former home with a friendly bark and a wag of her tail. 

"Hey Eljay," she would say warmly, once the man came within earshot. "Congratulations on your promotion." He had done well for himself since departing the Caldera.

Eljay wasn't sure whether he was relieved or disappointed that it wasn't Towhee who came to greet him. She was probably still resting, he told himself, and besides, he'd called specifically for Ruenna anyway. The caretaker smiled as Ruenna came into view with her usual limp. He was glad that she invited him to come up; he'd never cross the Caldera's borders without prompting, but he knew that for Ruenna it'd be a lot harder to head down than for him to come on up. It was one of the reasons he'd come here, as he wanted to spare her the journey to the Caldera. He knew how it was to be travel-impaired, even though his was of the mental sort rather than the physical sort.

Hi Ruenna, he said with a warm smile to mirror her own disposition. He was surprised when she congratulated him. Oh! Uh. Thanks. Eljay smiled sheepishly, feeling as though it wasn't really a thing to be congratulated for. But perhaps it was a little bit. We lost a lot of wolves, and uh — well, it just made sense, I guess, to the others. Eljay still didn't really understand how it had happened, but he had understood that someone needed to step up at the time, and so when they asked him, he'd stepped up. He didn't really know about the leadership situation in Redhawk Caldera, or he might've congratulated Ruenna as well. Already he felt like a babbling idiot, back here at Caldera borders, even though he also felt the tug of home and the regrets that he hadn't been able to raise Hymnal and Sylvie here. But if they'd moved here, then they would've stayed their family of four rather than adopting Ibis' three, so he knew that things were better this way. Besides... It felt better to be a respected friend who helped lead Brecheliant, rather than the uncertain, stammering caretaker he'd often felt like at Redhawk Caldera. It was hard to outgrow the dynamics of family, and whenever he saw Towhee, he could not help but feel his heart stiffen and a desire to impress her grow, which in turn made him not very impressive.

Even though it was right this way, Eljay still felt guilt creep up on him as he thought of Towhee's injury. Fennec could handle it, though, surely. I heard from Teya you wanted to visit us, so I thought I'd drop by myself, instead, and save you the journey, he offered kindly. He opened his mouth again to say something — an apology maybe, for leaving so suddenly at such a bad time — but he just couldn't find the words, so he saved them for later and exhaled with a tense sigh.

Inwardly, Ruenna was kicking herself for bringing up the promotion, because of course it had come as a necessity in the wake of bitter tragedy for Brecheliant. Of course Eljay would have mixed feelings.

"Oh, that's really thoughtful," Ruenna noted with gratitude. The mention of Teya reminded her of all of the unpleasantness that had occurred in the wake of the Fennec/Bridget altercation. It was that sort of drama that she hoped to nip in the bud in the future. 

"Yeah, I did mean to visit..." she paused, wondering where to begin. "I suppose you heard about everything that happened here at our border, with Bridget and Fennec..? I had an idea to hopefully prevent that sort of thing in the future, and I wanted to run it by your leadership." Ruenna was glad that Eljay would be the one to hear the pitch, because from their last encounter she'd gotten the impression that Teya wanted less and less to do with the Redhawks. But Eljay had been one of them once. He would understand just how important it was to keep this alliance thriving.

There was something awkward between them, and Eljay couldn't quite pinpoint what it was or why it was there. Was it because he'd left the pack so abruptly? This was his first time visiting again. Or was it because of what happened between Brecheliant and Redhawk Caldera? Eljay was unsure, but he didn't like the weird twisted feeling in his gut.

Eljay nodded when Ruenna asked if he had heard what had happened with Fennec and Bridget at the borders. Ruenna then said she wanted to run something by Brecheliant's leadership. Only a few seconds later did Eljay realise that was him, too. Oh, yeah, of course, uhm -- what's the idea..? He tilted his head and waited, feeling like he wasn't doing very good at the whole diplomacy thing.

Ruenna paid no mind to the slight stiffness in the air between them-- her interactions with Eljay had always been a bit awkward, and by now she had attributed that to him being sort of a nervous guy. 

"I thought we might hold some kind of joint event between the packs, so everyone can get to know each other a bit better." Ruenna's thoughts touched on some of the multi-pack gatherings in her past, particularly those hosted by Elysium. How she missed those evenings spent in the willows, with the songs and happy laughter echoing through the trees.

"A hunt, perhaps? If it works for Brecheliant, the equinox would be a good time for us. By then our youngest pup will be of the age to at least come watch." The older kids might even be able to participate, depending on what they were hunting.

A smile broke through Eljay's face when Ruenna suggested a joint pack event, such as a hunt. That's a great idea, he said right away. It would help build some trust between them, perhaps. Eljay was honestly more of a stick-to-my-own-pack sort of guy. He'd never understood why Towhee had allowed Wraen to leave the Firebirds because of their alliance to Moonspear. They should've put their own wolves first, no matter what.

Still, Redhawk Caldera was a place that was special to him. Now that he thought of it, Eljay grew nervous to think of seeing Towhee again, but he also knew that he couldn't postpone it forever. Let's make sure that happens, added with a nod after Ruenna's suggestion. But, uhm, when is the equinox? I'm not as good with that sort of stuff. Eljay smiled sheepishly. What territory do you think is suitable for this hunt? Eljay rarely explored, though he was not too sure if Ruenna explored more due to her injury. Maybe he should ask Maia if she knew a good place.

Eljay agreed immediately. Rue smiled, glad that her idea was well-received. 

"Oh.. it'll be the full moon after next." Next would come the Sturgeon Moon, and then the Autumnal Equinox. Ruenna had found that not all wolves were taught to keep time by the moon-- Eljay was far from the first who had requested clarification. Rue did have to wonder how wolves like Eljay kept up with appointments. 

"I was thinking we could meet in the middle at Lake Rodney." Keeping it nearby would ensure that all of their youngest members would be able to attend. "I don't know what kind of prey might be in the area then, but I'm sure our trackers will be able to make a prediction." That is, if the Caldera had any trackers at that point. Phox's and Bronco's respective departures had left them a bit in the lurch on that front.

Eljay nodded as Ruenna explained when it would be. Then as she said that they could meet at Lake Rodney, he nodded again. Yes, that sounds good. They'd have to figure out which side of it, but that would all depend on where the prey would be. He would ask @Teya to check it out by the time the autumnal equinox was there, or go himself (or perhaps accompany her himself) if he was able to free himself from family duties at the time.

Ruenna smiled. She paused for a few moments, wondering if this was all the Eljay had come to discuss. Ruenna still meant to make a trip to Brecheliant soon, but the message she carried was not for Eljay or the leadership of Brecheliant. It was for Reyes's ears alone. Towhee would not want any others involved. Truly, Ruenna still did not understand why Brecheliant sheltered a man who was known to be dangerous and had fallen out of favor with the Caldera. Were the roles reversed, Ruenna liked to think she would respect the mandate of her allies and extend the exile to her own border.

"I hope you travel safely," Ruenna spoke finally, after it seemed that their conversation had come to a close.

Eljay felt himself hesitate, wishing that he had the courage to go and see Towhee. They hadn't seen each other in so long. Everything was different now. He did long to see her — she was family, after all — but Eljay's heart was full of fear and he didn't think that he could handle it right now. Perhaps ever. So for now, he chose the road of avoidance and nodded. Thank you, Ruenna, he said with a soft smile. He glanced at the magnificent Caldera one more time. It felt so different, now. It'd been his home, the best place in the world.

Now, he just longed to run back to Maia's arms and the safety of the Fen. A place where perhaps he did not have family and protection and memories, but he had the knowledge that he could be himself that was enough for the wolves of his pack. For his family, perhaps not by blood, but by choice.

After a short moment of lingering he turned away and departed, with a weird twist in his gut.