Dragoncrest Cliffs let’s be like tigger and pooh
fire queen
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#1
All Welcome 
I assumed some things so just kick me if I’m wrong

Rose keeps to herself most of the time these days, although a big reason why is because @Furi has been strangely distant and there really isn’t anyone else the kru wants to hang out with. Every time she goes to find her elusive friend the scent either trails off or heads out of the territory where Rose isn’t certain she wants to cross just yet. It’s like she was avoiding her on purpose and well, to be frank, that seriously pissed the red head off. She hadn’t done anything to upset the gona, or at least she doesn’t think she has, and if she did she’d hope her friend would at least come and talk to her about it. But no, it was just dead quiet and boring as hell without her and Rose had finally had enough.

She set off that morning with determination in her step, fully prepared to search every nook and cranny of Drageda until she found the only one who might have some clue as to why her friend suddenly decided to remain so withdrawn. She would have howled but she didn’t want to alert Furi should she actually be in the territory. So instead Rose continued to scour the land for any sign of @Blixen and didn’t plan on stopping until she found her.
i'm the architect of my own destruction
i'm still here, but all is lost
718 Posts
Ooc — remus
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#2
❤️

all of her anger has faded into something bleak and cold and she channels every last bit of energy into her training. war is on them, again, and this time she intends to prove herself and finally earn cheka -- and maybe this is for the best. right? because when she's cheka she'll need to be focused on nomi -- heda -- and protecting her, and furi would just get in the way with her soft, sad eyes and her gentle hands.

but she's not like artaax, she can't just force herself to be over something. frustratedly she huffs, doubling back for another extra patrol (she'll patrol until she's worn a line around drageda's territory and her paws bleed at this rate) when she smells rose near by. oh no she's not ready to see her.

blixen freezes, hoping rose is just passing by. they're on good terms still but they aren't like, friends-friends, so there's no reason for her to be looking for bl

oh damn it to hell. "hei," the gona greets stiffly as her almost-twin comes into view. what does she want?
and there's nobody there to catch us when we fall
fire queen
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#3
It takes her some time until she comes across her look-alike, russet ears perking up at the greeting. “Hey” she lets out casually, the tension resonating in the air between them being completely ignored for the time being. She sucks in a long, deep breath and holds it for nearly half a minute before finally exhaling all her assumptions and accusations away. She didn’t want to believe Blixen might be the reason behind Furi’s sudden detachment but, if anyone was capable of sending her friend into full emo mode, Blix was probably it. 

“Did something happen between you and Furi?” she asks, trying her best not to sound like she was pointing her finger at the fiery gona, but in truth she did believe the yearling did have some part in this. Rose hoped she was wrong, that Furi was just really busy and that she was just overreacting because, if something did happen between them and her friendship was being effected because of it, she wasn’t sure she could forgive either of them.
i'm the architect of my own destruction
i'm still here, but all is lost
718 Posts
Ooc — remus
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#4

whatever it is she expects rose to ask, it isn't that. blixen takes a step back as if struck, her expression wounded. at length she says, "yeah," and pauses, sucking in a deep breath. "she dumped me."

this isn't the first time she's said so out loud -- there was ingram for starters -- but somehow admitting it to rose feels like ripping open a wound that's barely begun to clot over. she glowers at the girl, feeling suddenly petulant -- isn't it enough that rose won? she doesn't have to worry about her getting in between the pair anymore, furi can go be her best friend or whatever. before she can stop herself she adds, "so we don't have to pretend to be friends for her sake anymore," entirely too-mean too-petty and even as the words come out she winces at herself. rose and her hadn't been friends but they'd been fine and hell, even underneath all this anger blix still likes the pretty redhead -- well, damn, that ship has sailed.
and there's nobody there to catch us when we fall
fire queen
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#5
As soon as she heard the word yeah, Rose bit down hard on the inside of her lip. What the hell. So something had happened and apparently, it had been something big. The russet kru holds her breath when she hears the reasoning behind the strange behavior recently, and like a deer in the headlights, she freezes. Had she been hearing this from Furi, Rose probably would have been a bit relieved, but with it coming from Blixen, there was only anger instead. She was frustrated that Furi hadn’t come and talked about this with her and she was angry with herself that she hadn’t sought out her friend earlier. 

It’s only when Blixen continues to speak does the anger morph into something more foul. “You may have put on a fake smile, but I have never pretended a day in my life” she spits back, hurt and embarrassed that it had all been a lie. Was her interest in plants just an excuse to try and play nice too? Well damn it all. She lets out a huff, tail lashing behind her while trying to cool the emotions that threaten to spill over.
i'm the architect of my own destruction
we don't need another ruler
all my friends are kings
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#6
Feel free to notice Furi, or not, and skip me if you don't notice her! (for the time being)

Furi has purposefully been avoiding… well, everyone, to be honest, but especially Blixen and Rose. She doesn’t patrol the borders in the morning, not wanting to have another confrontation of shouting hurtful words at one another. Nor does she want Blixen to find her hanging around Rose, giving her another reason to throw that in her face too.
 
There’re voices in the distance, ears cupping forward, and she realizes the pair of girls are talking to one another. Her stomach drops heavy and she takes a few slow steps, unable to decipher what’s being said. Furi doesn’t want to face either girl and now, here they are, talking to one another. She stays back several years, keeping two close redwoods between her and the pair and hoping the wind doesn’t change and reveal her. For now, she only listens, worried something bad is about to unfold.
i'd give anything to hear you say it one more time
that the universe was made just to be seen by my eyes
i'm still here, but all is lost
718 Posts
Ooc — remus
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#7

furi's arrival goes unnoticed in the heat of the moment, as blixen nearly shouts "i wasn't pretending either!" -- nevermind the fact that she's the one who suggested that's what'd been going on. her expression wobbles, threatening to break. if rose hasn't been pretending and blixen hasn't been pretending, then who's flying the plane!

"i'm just jealous of you," she blurts, going full steam ahead on her emotional crisis, "'cause you're -- really cool! and pretty! and furi really likes you! and doesn't like me a-anymore, i -- i guess." oh, man. being a teenager is rough. the slightly older girl -- her lookalike -- has been a sore spot for her since her arrival in drageda, fair or not. in other circumstances, hell, blix might've gotten the crush on rose (and truth be told she does have one, just, small, and easily missed in the furi-related fracas) -- but her own insecurities continually displace into jealous and anxiety. 
and there's nobody there to catch us when we fall
fire queen
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#8
Russet ears pressed tightly against her crown when Blixen claimed she hadn’t been pretending either. Hadn’t she been the one to suggest such a thing! But no matter, Rose doesn’t even have time to think up her questions before Blixen is hurling an array of compliments in her direction, all of which make her anger rise above what she can contain. 

“You’re jealous of me!?” she shouts, fur ruffling up as she takes a step towards the gona, frustration involuntarily morphing into something weak and desperate and fragile. “You have a pack that supports you” she croaks out, voice breaking under the heavy pressure she suddenly feels weigh down on her chest. “You have a home!” Rose doesn’t even have the time to think over her next few words before they come pouring from her mouth in a mess of sobs. “You have a family!” and at this she felt herself be swept away by the emotions she had done so well of bottling up ever since the day her parents had abandoned her. 

She h a t e d this. This feeling of vulnerability made her want to run, and she probably would have had it not been for the fact that she was bawling with a force so great it made her want to vomit. “You’re loved!” Blixen had everything Rose had ever wanted and watching her look-alike take her friendships and family so easily for granted sickened the kru to the point of no return. “You have nothing to be jealous of!” she cried out, eyes puffy and the flesh under her rib cage burning at this point. 

She sucked in a shaky breath while taking a few unsteady steps backwards, the air around her feeling ten times heavier that what it should have. For her to look this way in front of Blixen of all wolves... She snapped her head away, hoping to shield the mess she currently was from the fiery gona’s eyes. And all the while their unwelcomed guess went completely unnoticed.
i'm the architect of my own destruction
i'm still here, but all is lost
718 Posts
Ooc — remus
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#9

despite the hardships in her life blix has been sheltered. she was wanted, she is loved, even through turbulent times she knows her family has her back. she's never put much thought into what it must be like for those outside of her family unit -- for rose and for furi (and maybe even seri to a degree). occasionally she's wondered if furi misses her family, but... since she never brought it up, blix has never really dwelled on it. after all, as far as she's concerned, once you join drageda you are part of drageda, your past be damned.

that is maybe not the correct way to think about things.

rose's reaction is not what she expects after that admission, and visibly startled, the smaller redhead takes a few steps backward. confusion sweeps through her. "r-rose," she says, and oh no, rose is crying, she can't really deal with that. the anger has been shocked out of her, leaving her winded. for a second she thinks about just.. leaving, but -- she's not a coward. instead she sucks in a deep breath, awkwardly looking away (less to give rose space and more to spare herself). "i... didn't know you felt that way," blixen says. in other circumstances the indignant urge to defend drageda (this is your home!) would have overwhelmed her. now she... wants to try to understand, maybe. "are... are you not happy here?" she asks, her voice unusually delicate. it's unfathomable, really. but... she wants to know. needs to. maybe it'll help her understand furi, too -- whose presence goes unnoticed, caught up in the moment as blixen is.
and there's nobody there to catch us when we fall
fire queen
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#10
The conversation, heated and moving at a pace she was barely able to keep up with, was charging in a direction that signaled all the alarms to go off in Rose’s head. She was terrified of opening up to anyone and had done so well with keeping her emotions in check for so long, that this sudden rush of pain felt so much worse that what it actually was. She sniffled at the girl’s comment, still refusing to look in her direction. She didn’t want her pity, and that’s exactly what it felt like she was getting. Yet at the question, her russet ear’s twitched atop her head and she wiped away and remainder of any tears. Was she happy here? Now that was the million dollar question. 

Yes is what she wanted to say, but she knew there would be little truth behind her words. No was of course the second answer to pop in her head, but to say she absolutely couldn’t stand it here was a lie as well. “I want to like it here” she began, trying to think of some way to get the words all jumbled in her head to form sentences in her mouth. “And I thought I was happy...” she had really believed this could have been a place for her to belong, but the harsh reality of the situation was, was that Drageda had never felt like home and it likely never would. “...but I don’t know anymore.”
i'm the architect of my own destruction
i'm still here, but all is lost
718 Posts
Ooc — remus
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#11

awkwardly blixen keeps her gaze averted, speaking less to rose and more into the air immediately to her left. she is no shouna. she squirms, trying to process the mixed message -- she's never had to think too hard about whether she's happy or not. 

frowning, the gona picks her words carefully (or as carefully as she can manage). "why? or, i guess, like. what... would make you happy here?" maybe it's just a matter of finding her niche -- that's something blixen could understand, that's a solvable problem. that it might be something too big or abstract to be solvable doesn't quite occur to her yet.
and there's nobody there to catch us when we fall
we don't need another ruler
all my friends are kings
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#12
Furi flinches when they start yelling at each other, staring at the base of a tree as she tries to picture them in their shouting match. It takes a lot of effort to keep her feet rooted to one spot, wanting to jump out and stop them, but that’ll make everything worse, probably. As long as they keep from one another’s throat, she doesn’t have to step out yet. And even if she did, they’d know she’d been listening?  And now, as Blixen confesses her jealousy and Rose spills her own pain, something she painfully relates too. Is that why she’s so drawn to the older, fiery girl?
 
Closing her eyes, trying to fight back swollen tears, she feels shaken to her core to hear Rose isn’t happy here. Her ears droop back against her head and she releases a slow breath, trying to stay as silent as possible. She knows she needs to turn and quietly retreat before she hears too much or they ultimately realize she’s here. But Blixen’s attempt to help, no matter how strained, keeps her feet glued to the ground.
i'd give anything to hear you say it one more time
that the universe was made just to be seen by my eyes
fire queen
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#13
Filled to the brim with emotions and now entirely uncomfortable, Rose shuffles awkwardly in her place when Blixen tosses her question up in the air. What would make her happy here? Could anything make her happy here? “What difference would it make if I tell you?” she questions, tone coming off harsher than intended. Her head snaps towards the gona, nostrils flaring while she searches for the amber gaze of the younger girl. She wasn’t selfish enough to ask Blixen or anyone else to change for her and in the same fashion she didn’t want Drageda to make her someone she was not.

Her gaze falls to the ground while she takes a step back, silence sweeping over the pair while her heartbeat continues to pound away in her chest. She wasn’t good at this. “I don’t know“ she finally decides after taking a moment too cool her temper, settling for the only answer that came to mind. What was she supposed to say when she didn’t even know what she wanted?
i'm the architect of my own destruction
i'm still here, but all is lost
718 Posts
Ooc — remus
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#14

rose does not seem appreciative of her attempts at -- being comforting, or whatever. honestly, blixen agrees. what difference does it make? drageda would not change to suit rose. she feels silly for having asked the asinine question in the first place, but like, at least she's trying, and has to resist the urge to snap back at her. 

instead blix frowns, her brown furrowing. "sorry," she says at length, "i didn't know how you felt. i guess you're right, it doesn't make much difference." she scuffs the ground and looks away, not sure where to go from here. "for, uh, for what it's worth, i do like you. so." maybe any chance of them being genuine friends has been scorched by furi and blix's relationship, by blix's immature jealousy, but -- maybe there's a chance they can actually get to know each other, too. who knows?
and there's nobody there to catch us when we fall
we don't need another ruler
all my friends are kings
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#15
Furi stares at the ground, ears cupped forward as she listens and tries to grab all the information she can. Of course, after her and Blixen parted ways, she and Rose make an attempt to patch things up. She doesn’t suspect it’ll all happen right now but she’s heard enough. With a pain coursing through her chest, struggling for an easy breath free of panic, she begins to quietly back pedal and make her way out of the area before she’s noticed.
i'd give anything to hear you say it one more time
that the universe was made just to be seen by my eyes
fire queen
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#16
Rose wasn't sure what she expected to come out of this little argument but an apology certainly wasn't on her list. It's not like her unhappiness was solely Blixen's fault even though the redhead did add to it every now and then. "an apology won't fix things but thanks for the thought anyways."

And with that Rose decided it was best to dismiss herself before anymore words were exchanged that she didn't intend to say or didn't want to hear. It was better for everyone this way, or at least she convinced herself it was.
i'm the architect of my own destruction