Bearclaw Valley starting with a clean slate
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All Welcome 
Blondine is back!

We are all born, and we will all die. Sometimes, if you're lucky, you get a chance to live, too. It's easy to take for granted the time that we have here on earth — the meals that we eat, the naps that we steal — because in the grand scheme of things, it's easy to count them out as insignificant segments of a bigger plot. It's not until we're facing the end that we realize just how much of the middle we've missed.

The trek back into the Wilds should have been difficult. It should have been unbearable, in fact. But for Blondine, the hardest part wasn't the journey, but stopping once it had ended. She had gone to Abernathy Hill for one thing, and now that he was gone, she had no reason to go back. The goodbyes that she'd said were permanent; whatever family she'd had, they were long gone. 

Bearclaw Valley had been her home before she'd left, and because she had no idea where else to go, these borders were the first place she stopped. After letting loose a quick howl for @Indra or @Laurel, or even @Xan or @Reigi, she sat back and took a few deep breaths, hoping to be fully composed by the time someone came to meet her.
i will pry his bony fingers free
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a howl indra had never expected caused her to stop mid-grooming of a squirming @Nunataq, her tongue poking from her mouth in confusion. she rose and stepped silently over @Marten, and then with a nudge for them to stay put or else, slid out of the burrow and made her way dazed towards the borders.

many things crossed her mind -- where had blondine gone, why had she left, did she hate her now? and, would she be happy to see her... like this? fat with her own puppies, still unhappy, tired all the time, and having two adoptive children that were not her own?

yet the questions that bubbled in her throat and threatened to overturn her confidence paled in comparison to the skipping of her heart when she saw her friend's familiar figure at the borders. alive, seemingly healthy, and there -- she did not hold back her stride, flouncing towards her gravid as a freshly-fed tick, her expression a mixture of hurt, joy, and confusion.

"blondine! you're back!"
now the wren has gone to roost and the sky is turning gold,
and like the sky, my soul is also turning.
you're the unbreakable heart
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#3
Laurel had not forgotten how Blondine had left her when she was about to burst, full with puppies. Laurel hadn't forgotten how Blondine had befriended Indra, only to rip her heart out and stomp on it, crush it underneath the weight of her departure. And she knew that Indra herself would not do anything about this. Normally Laurel would not let others watch the pups -- there was always she or Indra, after all -- but when she woke up without Indra there she knew that sh must come to her sister's aide. She told the pups to stay where they were (and perhaps someone else was near to watch them) and slipped from the den, hurrying her way to the borders because she did not want to be gone for longer than need be.

As she approached her face did not hold the same joy that Indra's did. She did not call out in joy for a long lost friend; she merely strode towards her sister and Blondine and demanded to know: "What are you doing here? Why did you leave?" Her look of ire reflected the hurt that Indra must surely feel. Laurel knew her sister well enough to know that she was feeling crap about this and wondered if it was her fault that Blondine had gone.

ooc note on the 18th: I'm away from tomorrow till Sunday, but feel free to skip laurel / pp her glowering at blondine if y'all want to proceed with the thread.
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They both moved with a certain haste that both startled and pleased Blondine, although she felt that she had no right to the latter. It had been her decision to leave without saying goodbye, just as it had been her decision to return. I love you, she whispered to Indra, just before Laurel took her seat at the table. There was nothing else to be said; it would be a lie to say that she'd come back to stay, or that she was sure this time, and lying would have only deepened the wounds she'd already dealt. 

My brother died, she said to Laurel, plain and cold, I had to see him before it happened. He's dead now, so I'm back. There was an icy air between the three of them that Blondine tried her hardest to think away, but it seemed to be impermeable. Coming back to the Valley was supposed to be carried out as a joyous occasion, but things rarely work out as planned.
i will pry his bony fingers free
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indra felt so many things at once, and then laurel came -- and righteously, appeared as frigid as the winter that summer had just chased away. indra's ears fell to her skull and her mixed expression turned to one of worry -- replaced with vexation as she deciphered what blondine had said. "what?!"

i love you - indra's features seemed to melt and knit simultaneously - what?  she felt confused, spun around and disoriented and awkward -- had she heard that right? she didn't even know how to react to blondine's admission; she wanted to reach out and hug and strike her at once - thank god you're back / how dare you leave me?

everything else in her life left her. laurel was all that remained, and as her sister coldly asked what needed to be asked indra once more felt buoyed by her presence. everyone left, except laurel.

a bitter thought in indra's mind was that someday, tadec would leave her too. she could not make herself vulnerable, not anymore, and as she glanced to laurel's steely composure she miserably tried to emulate it.. even though her heart was not into turning blondine away, in any way.

"w-wait, he's dead?" she asked softly, her ears drooping as she considered the pain blondine must feel in her heart. "i'm sorry.." she took a deep breath and lifted her gaze to blondine's russet features. "are you okay?"
now the wren has gone to roost and the sky is turning gold,
and like the sky, my soul is also turning.
you're the unbreakable heart
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#6
Laurel could feel the duality in her sister but she wasn't about to let Blondine worm her way into Indra's heart so easily. Everyone left, and so had Blondine. Laurel knew her task wasn't pretty, but someone ought to do it. The fact that Blondine didn't even apologise for leaving left Laurel with a sense of justice, that what she was doing was the right thing indeed. Laurel had missed the heart-felt love declaration, just caught the tail end of Indra's surprised reaction, but she did not respond much to it, so focussed on her own accusations rolling out.

The way Blondine said that her brother died Laurel didn't think Blondine felt very much at all. She really did need to protect her sister against this cold-hearted person. The way she then spoke almost sounded as if she had killed him herself; knowing it would happen, knowing she must see him beforehand. What, had he been tried and executed? Laurel thought all of this rather sketchy and she mistrustingly squinted her eyes at her sister's friend.

"You don't sound like you care very much about his death at all," Laurel said snippily to Blondine. "So what are you back here for, now?" Laurel didn't think that Blondine deserved to rejoin the pack very much but she also knew Indra would probably just let her because she was Indra and such a soft-hearted creature. All the while Laurel wasn't even considering that neither of them had a say in it, really, not yet anyway.
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It was comparable to blashphemy, Laurel's accusation. To even suggest that Blondine was the slightest bit unaffected by the death of her brother was a crime against the spirit that she refused to tolerate. Ignoring Indra's lapse in posture and obvious concern, she straightened herself and tightened her gaze to communicate her distaste. She took a step back from the border so that her entire body was in neutral territory and rank or displays lost their meaning; regardless of whether Blondine was an alpha or a loner, Laurel had overstepped.

While Blondine was clearly in no condition to spark up fights with pack wolves, she knew that she had an image to protect; without that backbone, who was she? Now, while I do respect you, Laurel, Blondine began, tail twitching with agitation, I think we both ought to rethink how we go about this conversation. Then, finally turning to Indra to speak her reply in a much more level tone, I'm alright.

I'm not coming back to ruffle anyone's feathers. I came to explain myself, and whether you'd like to redeem me for the crime that you believe I've committed, I'm quite impartial. This business was clearly going to remain unresolved but it was also the last of Blondine's concerns. Whether Laurel was able to let her hurt go or not didn't matter; the only one who she'd come for was Indra, and seeing that she was healthy and alive was all that the Abernathy needed.
i will pry his bony fingers free
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indra was taken aback by laurel's suggestion -- she seemed to rock as if pushed, ears cupped in a mixture of doubt and worry. it was just like laurel to speak her mind freely - indra had not even realized until after laurel spoke that blondine still carried her stately composure despite mentioning her brother's death. if indra had to tell anyone that laurel was dead, she would not have been so matter-of-fact in its deliverance. doubt started to slowly trickle into her thoughts; doubts on the veracity of blondine's departure, doubts on what had really happened -- and most of all, doubt that blondine would not leave her unexpectedly again like she had before.

it was enough to tilt the dam she had built up inside of her: the stone wall, conical and frayed, that kept all of her hurt and resentment buried deep inside of her. but laurel's hidden accusation was the tiny blade that suddenly let loose a trickling stream of mistrust. a stream that in a matter of seconds became a belligerent and furious torrent. blondine had hurt indra beyond words when she had left, without so much as a word to her -- and seeing her here again was like revisiting an old and bloody wound.

it killed indra inside to turn her gaze to blondine, but laurel had been the only wolf to never let indra down - it was an uncomfortable thing to even think, but in every single circumstance indra would have always sided with her sister. "i think you should go." indra said quietly, feeling something inside of her positively wrench and fracture, and something ugly and miserable fan out comfortably in its place.
now the wren has gone to roost and the sky is turning gold,
and like the sky, my soul is also turning.
you're the unbreakable heart
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Laurel's hackles pricked up tensely as Blondine spoke again. She was ready to lash out, and her respect for Indra was the only thing that stopped her from doing it. This was Indra's friend, and while Laurel thought that Blondine didn't deserve Indra's friendship, she wasn't going to take that from her sister. She ground her teeth and held her tongue for now. Blondine's complete lack of any emotions as she told the story, then said she was here only to explain herself, was frustrating to Laurel, but she didn't want to hurt her sister's good friend.

Indra's words came as a surprise, but not an unwelcome one. Laurel hid a smile as she turned to Blondine with a dark frown still on her face. She did not speak, merely glared at Blondine. The implications were clear: Go.
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If there was one thing that Blondine knew, it was when she'd overstayed her welcome. After matching Laurel's glare and giving a farewell nod to them both, Blondine turned and begrudgingly walked away, wondering if there was more that she could have said.