Sun Mote Copse I'll be resting my eyes
gubraithian fire
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Ooc — Kat
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All Welcome 
Dated May 25.

A rainy night gave way to a cool, clear morning. The birds began singing before daybreak and, despite feeling feverish and weak, Wildfire managed to crawl to the mouth of the den to look for them flitting among the dewy trees. She watched as the sun rose, gilding the copse in a golden film, and she felt her heart swell in her chest. The Sovereign was, all at once, utterly happy and so bitterly sad.

She hadn't eaten or even drank in days. She hadn't slept either, knowing that the next time she closed her eyes would be the last time. Wildfire knew she couldn't hold on too much longer. Her body had wasted away rapidly, as had her strength.

It was so damn unfair. She had felt fine just three weeks ago. It had all happened so fast. Wildfire didn't know terms like "multicentric" or "lymphoma," yet she was now all too well acquainted with the way cancer could seemingly sneak up and ravage someone who seemed otherwise perfectly healthy and at the prime of her life.

Using some of the last of her strength, Wildfire turned her head and whispered to her family. "@Eljay? @Elfie? @Weejay?" Her chestnut eyes spoke where her voice then failed her. Please come here.
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;-;

A change had come over them all, one that Weejay did not understand.. and yet, she knew it was bad. Bad the way Buzz-Buzz was, or bad the way escaping the den at night was. Bad even, like when she had gotten a thorn stuck in her paw, and no amount of cajoling from her loving parents could offset that first bite of cruel pain.

But this bite was different; Weejay felt a cold mood in the den, one that was not happy or playful or bright. A mood that was tired and exhausted, used up and bare. She was young yet, but not so young to miss the sinking of her mother's chestnut gaze, the sudden gauntness of her features -- even the way Daddy looked at Mommy was different, almost fearful. It stirred fear in her, too.

Mommy was but a ghost, changed beyond repair. Weejay could see that Mommy was there before her, but it was not Mommy, it was someone else; someone sickly and thin and ravaged, drab of fur, with no spark to a gaze that looked as if it had stared too long into suffering. Weejay didn't understand it, what had happened, why wasn't Mommy okay, why couldn't Daddy fix it? He could fix everything? Didn't he care?

Weejay had taken to sleeping just outside the den these lonely nights, knowing in her heart that something bad was still coming. Mommy looked like the way she had seen some flowers, frail and withered -- if the wind was too strong, or she played too rough, would she break her?

Hearing Wildfire call for her, Weejay rose quickly, a beat of her old bounce back in her step until she remembered. Her ears fell to her little skull, and her expression was one of fretful sorrow mixed with longing - she wanted to be close but mostly, she wanted things to go back to they way they had been before. Back to her Mommy strong and beautiful, telling her about birds in the trees, or sharing a meal. Anything but this skeleton before her, that was only lifeless auburn fur (bled of its spark) pitched over thin bones.

She was already crying as she met her mother's sides, feeling overwhelmed with fear and love. The way her Mommy could barely lift her head caused Weejay's throat to constrict suddenly -- a hitching sob started in little Weejay's throat as she crawled towards Wildfire, knowing and not knowing that something was impossibly, irrevocably wrong.
so hold nice and close the ones who get to your soul,
so that when it is cold, you wont feel so alone
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Ooc — Iris
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The past days had been hell. Eljay had changed considerably; he, too, had started to eat less and though he hadn't lost as much weight as Wiffle had, it was clear from everything he hadn't taken care of himself well. All that kept him going were the pups, and he made sure that they had food and tried to keep their moods high. Elfie seemed to have less trouble with this -- being very food-focussed and just happy to be fed and napping -- than Weejay, who'd been a handful. But there seemed nothing he could do to help her out, just as there was nothing he could do to help himself out; just as there was nothing he could do to help Wiffle out.

Apart from tending to the pups his days were filled with tears and heartache, and worrying and fussing over Wiffle; keeping her fed -- whatever he could get in there was the win of the day -- supporting her to the stream so she could drink while she still could, making sure that she was warm enough... He had no time for anything but his family these days, and while that should've been an amazing thing that he should have shared with Wiffle, instead it was a dreadful, terrifying thing that he wanted to escape from. A horrible nightmare. Eljay rarely slept these days, and when he did it was often because he simply fell over from exhaustion rather than because he chose to sleep. Many nights were spent staring at Wiffle as she slept.

He'd fallen over not that long ago from exhaustion and was sleeping fitfully until he heard Wiffle's voice. The fact her whispers woke him up were an indication of how poorly he slept when he did, always alert and ready to take care of her. There was something to her voice that tore his heart apart, though he couldn't quite place it yet himself. W-wiffle? His voice trembled as he came closer. Eljay hadn't quite come to terms with the nearing end yet; he still wanted to believe that his mate would get better, somehow, some way.
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Elfie had not been oblivious to, what was happening with his mother, but he was very good at hiding that anxiety behind doing something all the time. If he was not napping, he was playing, he was exploring, he was getting on Weejay's nerves, he was a little shark-teethed jerk on his father or any other baby-sitter that happened to be around. And he was eating.

His hunger was voracious. If nothing else could calm him down, he began to eat. And eat he did until he was full, until he grew sick and vomited it all out, only to pick up the pieces again. Eating made him happy for a while and sleepy, full belly and feeling of being on the brink of nausea kept the looming cloud of badness at bay. The problem he tried to solve was way bigger than him and he coped with it the best he could. 

Elfie distanced himself from his father and sister, whose emotional turmoils he did not understand and could not stand. They inspired anger in him that he did not understand. He did not approach his mother, who was wasting away because of the disease, though time from time one would catch him sitting quietly and observing her with a deep-set frown in his features, an accusing look in his eyes. 

Even as she called for them today, he approached unwillingly, cast a glance of disgust at his sobbing father and Weejay, then his eyes set on Wildfire's - cold and angry, challenging her to do something, to change things, not to fail him.
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They came to her, each of them subdued, the air thick with melancholy, an edge of fear and—from her son's direction, particularly—a thread of anger. Wildfire didn't blame him; whatever Elfie felt, it was valid. The same went for Eljay and Weejay. The end of her life would be one of the toughest moments of theirs.

She would've liked to give a long, heartfelt speech to them, yet Wildfire was simply too exhausted for that. She did manage a careworn smile and a few words: "I love you guys so much. I don't want to leave you but I have to, soon, and I'm so—sorry." She sighed as her numbered heartbeats thudded dully in her chest.

"Eljay, could you please call the pack—and the Redhawks—anyone who wants to come say goodbye?" It was one of the hardest sentences she'd ever spoken and her chestnut eyes shimmered with tears from where they'd sunken into her face. As she looked up at her mate, her gaze was an apology and a love letter.

While he presumably took care of the call, Wildfire turned to her children and smiled, her dry bottle brush of a black tail thumping ever so slightly on the den floor as her head sunk to her forelegs, angled so that her cheek rested on the exposed tendons and she could still see the kids. "Can I ask for a hug and a kiss?" she whispered.
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As Weejay reached for her mommy, she saw Wildfire glance away -- towards her brother. The look of anger on his face was almost enough for the girl to redirect her anxiety into aggression -- but it was not her self-constraint that prevented her from doing so. Rather, it was the complexity of her Mommy's words.

Weejay didn't understand any of it. Where was Mommy going? She couldn't go anywhere like this, and besides, Weejay wouldn't let her. She slumped right next to Wildfire's thin chest and huffed loudly, the tears still hot and matted on her little face. Daddy would make this right, Mommy wasn't going to go anywhere, and soon this stupid, unfun day would come to a close and everything would be right again.

Right?
so hold nice and close the ones who get to your soul,
so that when it is cold, you wont feel so alone
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Ooc — Iris
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Wiffle's words tore right through Eljay's heart. She was saying goodbye, everything was pointing in that direction, but he couldn't. She couldn't. No! Eljay choked out as he started to sob and tears started to stream down his cheeks. Wiffle, don't, I -- we need you, please! I love you! He begged as if his life depended on it, as if truly Wiffle could've just chosen to have stayed with them. .. please.. Eljay buried his face in Wiffle's fur and his body shook with violent sobs as his begging became less and less audible until it was no more than a hoarse whisper lost to the strands of her fur. .... please...

She asked for him to call but he was in no state to do anything of the likes. Eljay tried to get up, but he found his legs unwilling and unable. He managed to lift his nose. When he sang for the pack it was a bleak and torn apart melody wreaked by the rawest of pain; his voice was not clear or loud and cracked all around, and only those nearby might hear it at all.

Then he once more collapsed into Wiffle's fur. It wasn't the ending she deserved, and it wasn't the memory their children deserved either. But Eljay had never been very good at giving anyone what they needed, wanted or deserved. He could not even take care of himself in his moment; let alone his children or his dying mate.

It just wasn't fair. They had only just found each other...
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Wildfire invited her children to come nearer and both his father and sister obliged. Elfie did sort of a half-hearted attempt to get up and go, but changed his mind and remained seated, where he already was. He watched Eljay break down and Weejay weeping by his mother's side and yet none of them did anything to improve the situation. Make it better. They had simply given up the same way mother had. 

Part of him yearned to snuggle up right next to Wildfire, close his eyes and imagine that this was all a very bad nightmare, from which he would wake up soon. But the other part was repelled by her current state, afraid of her changed features, rebelling against the sadness taking over and making him just as miserable as the rest of his family was. He decided that he would not cry and that he did not want to be a witness of all this any longer. 

He gave his mom one last look, got to his feet and walked away, hoping that the distance he put between him and her would somehow ease the devastation he was struggling against.
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i cried and you get a book.

Fin had kept a watchful eye on her daughter ever since Wildfire's fateful visit to their home. Thus far, Small (as Fin had affectionately begun calling her) hadn't shown any signs of illness, nor had she or any of the other Blackthorns enclosed in the den with them. It should've been a massive relief. It was, really. But her relief only managed to last a short while because while her youngest children were safe, her eldest was not, and it was terribly clear to her now that she never would be.

She had known the call was coming. Her heart had tried to reject the truth, but Finley was too old and too experienced to get away with denial for long. She didn't know much about medicine, but she knew what bad signs looked like, and what had happened to Wildfire in her den that day was one of the worst she'd ever seen. It was a terrible thing to know because knowing it did nothing to help her put a stop to it. Her daughter was dying, and Finley was completely powerless to save her.

She moved like a woman walking to her own execution as @Elwood's side as they left their kids with @Colt or Maia (Fin knew who, I just don't for sure :D) and headed to answer the call. There were tears streaming down her cheeks before they even arrived. She pressed herself against Elwood as they walked in silence to the den, using the motion of his body to keep her moving forward. She might not have ever had the strength to make it all the way there were it not for his support. All she wanted to do was lay down and cry until it all just went away. Then maybe she could wake up and things would be back the way they were supposed to be, with Wildfire okay and raising Fin's grandkids alongside of her son.

Finley just couldn't imagine a world that didn't have Wildfire in it. Even when her goddaughter had been off on the Cliffs, starting a new life, Fin had been comfortable in the fact that Wildfire was alive and she was well. Her life was just supposed to have Wildfire in it. She was supposed to be somewhere, anywhere, happy. A life without her in it was just too unreal to be bearable. It was too infuriatingly, devastatingly wrong. It wasn't the way things were supposed to be. Wildfire was hers, even before Peregrine and Fox had left them. Wiffle had been hers from the moment she was born, and to be losing her was just too horrible to be real.

All too soon, they had arrived. Fin took a few shuddering breaths before lifting her gaze to set her eyes on her kids and shortly found herself surprised to see her grandson walking towards them. "Elfie," she called gently as she stepped forward, her grief slipping off of her as she fully took the scene in. Something clicked with her then and she realized with staggering clarity how horribly selfish she had been on the way here. This was not her time to wallow in her heartbreak over losing Wildfire. Her kids needed her.

Finley moved to them, looking quickly to see that Wildfire had not yet gone, but Eljay was. She nudged her son gently and gave a soft whine to let him know she was there, and also to gather his attention. "Eljay," she murmured tearfully, "Your son. He needs you." She glanced up, seeing Weejay and reaching to touch the girl lightly on her crown before her eyes landed finally on Wildfire. Her chest clenched fiercely at the sight as a lump swelled in her throat again. She swallowed it as best as she could. After all, Wildfire was her kid, and Wildfire needed her most of all.

"Hey little girl," Fin said, offering her a tear-filled smile. She considered all of the things she could say then. How much she loved her, how she had always been hers for all of her life. How much she would miss her, and how much her life wouldn't be the same without her in it. But looking at Wildfire then, Fin knew that those weren't the things her daughter needed to hear. Those were the things she knew. There were far more important things in a moment like this. Because the tragedy here wasn't a mother losing her child. It was a mother leaving her children when they were so young and their futures yet unknown.

"We'll take care of them," Fin said, holding Wildfire's gaze in her own, "Your kids. All of them. Your uncle and I, we'll look out for them. We'll make sure they're taken care of, that they're okay. We'll ... We'll keep them safe for you. In every way."
 
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Ooc — Kim
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For as level-headed as he normally was, Elwood was having a hard time facing the cold, hard facts of his goddaughter's impending death. It took every ounce of strength for him not to dig his heels in and refuse to go see her, in hopes that if he didn't witness it, it couldn't actually happen. But while this inner turmoil was raging within him, he kept his expression carefully measured, his body language calm and comforting, as he and Finley left their children with their trusted babysitter of choice and made the long walk to Wildfire and Eljay's densite.

While Finley's tears were flowing, his eyes were dry; however, his stomach was in knots. The devastation in Eljay's voice when he sent up the call was almost too much to bear, but he knew that Eljay needed his parents -- that Wildfire needed them, too, and so would Elfie and Weejay. As they approached the Sovereign's homestead, he swallowed hard and took a deep breath.

Settling his gaze on Wildfire's emaciated figure was hard, and he bit his lip at the sight of Eljay and Weejay curled protectively against her. Elfie was distancing himself -- physically and emotionally, he suspected -- and Fin gently encouraged Eljay to go to him. Then, with more composure than he could muster himself, she addressed their goddaughter. She assured Wildfire that they would look after Elfie and Weejay (and Eljay, he added mentally), and all he could do was nod firmly.

"We love you," he said softly, yellow eyes shimmering.
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She could see the bewildered hurt in both her children's eyes and was grateful when Weejay came closer anyway. Wildfire nuzzled against her, breathing in her scent and soaking up her warmth. She looked beseechingly at Elfie but he had already turned and left the den. Although it broke her heart, she understood and didn't hold it against him or love him any less. Goodbye, baby boy, she thought, knowing the flash of his little red tail was the last she would ever see of him.

Wildfire couldn't dwell on that long. Her mate had now collapsed against her, sobbing into her fur, and the Sovereign made a soothing noise low in her throat and simply bore his weight and his tears. She wished she could hold him but she didn't have the strength. She wish she could think of something profound to say but she was too tired for speeches. All she could do was think I'm sorry and I love you and thank you and goodbye...

She could feel her heartbeats slowing in her chest, her breath coming shallower now. Her eyelids felt heavy and the interior of the den was dimmer than before. Wildfire refused to risk resting her eyes, instead clinging to consciousness. Fortunately, her loved ones did not make her wait. It was only moments after Eljay's broken call that her godparents arrived at the den. She could barely lift her eyes to look at them, much less her head. But she sensed them there, was comforted by their familiar scents and the soft sounds of their voices. They had been there the day she'd come into this world and she was glad they would be here on the day she left it, even if their roles should have been reversed.

Finley had the presence of mind not only to come up close but whisper exactly the words the dying mother needed to hear. Despite the fact that her bodily processes were already shutting down on her, tears squeezed out of her eyes and trailed down her bony cheeks. "Thank you," she breathed, "I love you." Again, there was so much more she wanted to say but there just wasn't enough time and Wildfire didn't have the energy. She just hoped those five simple words said everything else she couldn't.

The Sovereign said nothing else after that, simply existing in these last few precious moments with her nearest and dearest so close by. Wildfire felt like she could let go now, surrounded by those she loved and those who loved her back just as fiercely. And though she was terribly sad and afraid, she was also as prepared as she could be for this untimely end. But she wanted to hold on... just a little longer... just in case...

"@Kiwi?" she breathed into the solemn air of the den. Where had her daughter gone? Who would step up and take care of the pack in her absence? "@Raven?" Wildfire knew the Redhawks matriarch was busy these days but hoped she would come. Like Elwood and Finley, she had been there since Wildfire had taken her first breath and she wanted Raven to be beside her too when she drew in her last.
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#12
Wraen had been nearby, when Eljay called pack-mates to bid farewell to Wildfire. She had noticed the signs of her cousin's decline, but had never imagined them to be so severe. Though the sad reality was obvious, in the back of her mind she kept to the hope that with the summer rolling in, her queen would regain her strength and be well again. 

Apparently not. She arrived to a heart-breaking scene and stood on the fringes, watching, how those, who had always been closest and dearest to Wildfire, said tearful and heart-felt good-byes. She felt that the situation was too personal for her to barge in, and decided not to intervene now. This was no place for strangers. Instead she spotted Elfie - Wildfire's look-a-like son - marching off in the undergrowth. 

This was her opportunity to be at least a little useful - she padded over to the little fellow and got in his path. "Now, we would not want to get lost, would we?" she leaned down to speak to the boy, who looked back at her with so much anger and pain in his eyes, that she was taken aback for a moment. "I will take care of him," she told and hopefully one or the other of the adults heard her. Then she simply followed the boy a small distance behind.

He needed alone time and Wraen would make sure that he would not get in any trouble in the meanwhile.
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It was Colt watching the kids, because Fin would have asked him probably and he would have definitely said yes.

But Maia didn't want to intrude, and she didn't want to do sad.  So while Wraen was nearby, Maia was away, outside the territory and sulking.

She'd come back that night and probably cry to Wraen about it but until then, she kinda just wanted to be alone and anywhere but where death was happening.
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Ooc — aerinne
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Kinda OOC: Let's pretend somebody called the Redhawks. Or maybe Phox heard the call for the Firebirds and figured that since they were sister packs, he should make an appearance, considering he was in the area. We're making a heckuva lot of assumptions here, but I really wanna be part of this gosh dang thread, ok?

He'd seen her so recently. How long had it been? A week, maybe two? Wildfire had come to see Raven, and they'd chatted about bringing the kids all together once summer had passed and fall was on its way. And now, gathered around, he saw her as a mere shadow of what she once was. It took every ounce of his determination to not flee like he had so many times before. This was growing up. Losing loved ones, one after another. Towhee might have experienced it early on with him and Orca (and even Titmouse), but Phox was only just healing from the loss of Camilla. And now another loved one was departing this world.

He had come to tell Wildfire of his plans with Towhee and the kids, but none of that was relevant right now. He spotted her two pups, Eljay, Finley, Elwood, and a couple of other faces he half-recognized, including Wraen, whom he had met only days ago. She asked for Raven, but Phox wasn't sure if she'd heard the call. Hopefully she had.

Inching his way toward Wildfire, he booped her snoot.
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Ooc — Houkie
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Gonna assume someone sent up a call because I’ll be d a m n e d if I miss out on this one. PPing Quixote with Jennifer’s permission!

The call came across the miles faded and garbled by distance, and some of its meaning was lost along the way, but the most important part was clear: Wildfire needed her. That was one call she would always answer, no hesitation, no questions asked. Already nearly a month pregnant, she didn’t move as fast as she normally could, but she still set a good pace as she ran down the slope of the plateau and out into the plains beyond. Along the way, she had picked up Quixote’s trail and after a brief detour to intercept him, she continued onward accompanied by her mate.

It didn’t take long to get there. Something in Raven told her that time was of the essence. It wasn’t anything she consciously thought about, it was just a nagging little instinct that guided her to keep moving fast and so she did, leading the way as Qui ran beside her. He asked what was up, to which all she could reply was, ”I don’t know.” The bond the two sisters shared was inexplicable in that sort of way, and while Raven had no idea why she felt such an urgent need to get there with haste, she just knew that she had to.

They arrived breathless and a little footsore, managing to find their way to where a small group of wolves had gathered. There were several familiar faces there, but Raven had no time for them — Wildfire lay there at the mouth of her den, so frail and drained Ray nearly didn’t recognize her. The black alpha was so startled by the difference in her sister’s appearance that she stopped dead and stared for the space of a few seconds, her mouth falling open in a small “o”.

Wifi had come to her just recently, just as bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as she ever was. They had talked about how great life was, gushed about children both present and expected, shared some laughs. Everything had been fine. Normal. Wifi had asked her about the lump on her throat and while Raven had expressed some concern for it, there had been no immediate cause for panic or anything. Now here her sister lay, clearly dying. What was happening? Why was this happening?

She approached Wildfire — the only littermate she had left — and sank down by her side, feeling nauseated and dizzy. Her insides felt cold, shaky and watery as she ever so gently touched her sister’s cheek with her nose. There was so much she wanted to say, so many questions she needed answers to, and yet in that moment she could find no words but, ”Oh, Wifi.”
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Ooc — Jennifer
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He came to a halt and his brain did a pretty good job just emptying entirely of valid thoughts for a minute or so.  Why?  How?  What? He'd seen death from battles, but this was different, and in a way more gruesome and cruel.  And part of that seemed to be its randomness -- at least if you knew you were taking risks you theoretically were accepting the possible negative results.  

When his brain finally unfroze, he looked around at the whole group, one by one, then back to Raven and Wildfire specifically.  None of them deserved this to happen.  He bowed his head sorrowfully, but didn't want to approach much more and crowd people.  Maybe he could say something?  ... Yeah, no chance in hell of Qui having anything resembling words right now.

Why?
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Ooc — Kat
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As her body slowly shut down in preparation for her heart to stop and her life to end, another victim to a particularly aggressive form of cancer, Wildfire's mental faculties—sharp as a blade through her rapid spate of illness—started to deteriorate now as she lay still on her deathbed. Her thoughts began to drift, her mind somewhere between waking and sleeping, rousing now and then as she captured snatches of familiar scents, beloved voices. She stirred a bit when Raven arrived at last. Phox was there too, though Wildfire only registered his presence dimly. She could still feel her mate and daughter nearby, perhaps counting down her heartbeats.

Abruptly, synapses began to misfire. No longer was she the Wildfire they knew and loved; nor would she ever be again. In these final moments, Wildfire cried out in a wretched voice that would probably haunt everyone present the rest of their days. "Thur!" Foamy spit collected at the corners of her mouths as she drew in rattling breaths. "Kiwi..." the fallen Sovereign sighed, tears glistening in chestnut eyes as they found and locked on Raven, her sister, the medic. "The poison," she stated as calmly and clearly as you please, clinging to one last thread of consciousness, pupils slowly dilating on a sigh.
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Ooc — Iris
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Eljay didn't even realise that Elfie had left until mommy arrived and pointed it out. Though he was in no state to care for children right now, Eljay nodded and got up. It was Wraen who then arrived to save the day; she agreed to look after Elfie so he could be here in these last moments. Eljay gladly turned back to Wiffle though he shot Wraen a last appreciative smile, however thin it was, before collapsing right back into the same spot where he continued to sob by Wiffle's side.

Others arrived, Raven among the ones who actually comforted in some way, but Eljay was so focused on Wiffle that he barely noticed all of their presences. He just didn't understand it at all, all of this.

Seemingly suddenly Wiffle started to foam at the mouth and shouted out names in such a way that it sounded as if she was possessed. Eljay's head shot up and ears folded back in surprise. Though he didn't quite realise who "Thur" was (having known her as the Heda) the way she spoke that name would haunt him for some time to come. Wiffle didn't look herself at all anymore.

"The poison," she said and she looked at Raven. Eljay looked at Raven too. What did it mean? Did Wiffle have some sort of poison? Did Raven know more about it? Eljay looked at Raven with teary eyes, waiting for an explanation.
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There was an old saying that first and last words often shared the same coherence: luckily for Weejay, she didn't know this expression, and she didn't know what half of the worlds her Mommy croaked were. All she knew was that her mother had just uttered a wretched noise she would never forget: her ears folded back and she cowered, watching fearfully as spittle rimed Wildfire's lips.

And just like that, she was gone. Weejay watched in horror as her Mommy's eyes lost their soul and her body slumped; there's an eerie quality to a body that is winding down; the brain misfires and ceases its endless chain of processing, the heart gurgles and suckles in its last pump before eternal stillness, and the blood settles and settles while the eyes are suddenly no longer reflective of the world around them.

Weejay saw all of this and knew, without knowing in so many words, that her Mother was gone forever. She sat up and threw herself at her mother's unresponsive shoulder with a sob. "MOMMY! NO!" The girl blubbered, tugging roughly at the suddenly lax skin. "Don't go," Weejay blurted between her mother's fur, choked by tears as she continued her insensate tugging of her mother's lifeless form.
so hold nice and close the ones who get to your soul,
so that when it is cold, you wont feel so alone
gubraithian fire
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#20
That was the last thing Wildfire ever heard: her child's cry of, "MOMMY!" In her state, she didn't register the fear and pain in the wail, nor the rest of the words. She no longer felt Weejay's warm, salty tears or the pressure of her tiny embrace. She was only aware of that word. Wildfire had held many important titles in her short life—Redhawk, Firebird, Bandrona, Sovereign; Master this and Master that; daughter, niece, sister, mate...—but none as important as "MOMMY!"

In that final moment, Wildfire's life didn't flash before her eyes, nor did she suddenly step into an afterlife full of the heavenly host. She drew in one last breath, holding Eljay and Weejay in her lungs, pressed against her heart, where she kept them forevermore, as there was no exhale. Wildfire's wasted body grew very still and her head nodded to rest against Weejay's. Her chestnut eyes, pupils blown and lifelessly flat, mercifully drifted closed to mark the end of her suffering and the conclusion to her story.
1,002 Posts
Ooc — Houkie
Midwife
Master Medic
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#21
So much was going on around her, but Raven only had eyes for Wildfire. The only wolf remaining in the world with whom she had shared a womb. The only wolf in the world who understood her -- truly understood her. Her dearest friend. Her closest confidante. Life had taken her away from Raven far too soon, when Wildfire had somehow ended up running with the wolves of Drageda, and now that she had returned, life was once again taking her away. It was so damn unfair! Was this what it was to live and to love? A seemingly endless parade of losses and goodbyes?

She swallowed those sour thoughts, along with the hideous sense that she had somehow failed her sister. Wildfire had just come to her and asked her about the lump in her throat, and Raven had advised her to keep an eye on it. That was all. "Just keep an eye on it." There had to have been more than she could have done. What kind of Master Medic was she when she couldn't even save her own sister?

Wildfire's final words to her left her baffled and confused. She had never mentioned anything to Raven about any sort of poison, and she hadn't displayed any of the symptoms that typically accompanied poisoning when last she'd visited. She flattened her ears at those words, shaking her head as if to ask, "What?", wordlessly asking for more explanation. But she would not receive it as, mere seconds later, her sister took her last breaths and died.

The words and actions of everyone around her faded out of existence as Raven crumpled to the ground at her sister's side, leaning forward to bury her face in the soft autumn fur for which the beautiful she-wolf had been so aptly named. She inhaled Wildfire's scent, allowed it to surround her, as she squeezed her eyes shut and felt her heart literally die in her chest. If anyone were to ask her what it felt like to die, she knew in that moment that she could rather competently describe it to them. It felt like watching your favorite person die and knowing there was nothing you could do to stop it. With her face still pressing into Wifi's fur, she whispered softly, "I'm so sorry."

Moments later, she rose to her feet, turned, and stumbled blindly away, cold and numb and suffocating on her own devastation.
we are biding our time, for these myths to unwind
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#22
Her mother was gone beneath her. If ever a living thing felt a soul leave the body, it was Weejay -- for she felt, in every sense of the word, that her mother had inexplicably escaped from her.

Rocked into the same dumbfounded shock as Raven, Weejay pushed against her mother's limp body. It was still warm, but it held none of the tensile strength of her skin while she was still living. There was no tension, no movement, no response. Just... nothing.

Weejay stilled, and her mother's body slumped besides her.

Then she rocked herself, back and forth -- the tears welling in her eyes again as she blubbered. She could not form words nor think, and at length was collected by a grim-faced adult and shepherded elsewhere, for in that moment all senses had misfired and Weejay was simply stuck in a continuing, shuttering cycle of sorrow and disbelief.
so hold nice and close the ones who get to your soul,
so that when it is cold, you wont feel so alone
Brecheliant
NPC
a hundred mini dreams and a healing scar ♥
2,109 Posts
Ooc — Iris
Master Medic
Master Midwife
Master Sitter
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#23
Raven seemed to have no idea what Wiffle's last words meant. Eljay turned his attention back to his mate and he looked as life truly left her. In the back of his mind, music played. Music that had lyrics such as 'you have to be there for your kids!' and 'grow up, Eljay, be brave!' and 'Wolves die!' Many confronting tunes were played there, but at the forefront of his mind, all Eljay could do was bawl like a child and bury his face in Wiffle's fur as her body grew colder and colder with each passing moment.

And so he did.
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Ooc — Stevie
Advisor
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#24
Fin fell quiet after she saw the gratitude and relief wash over Wildfire's face. She slipped into the background after that, simply watching mournfully as their loved ones shuffled in and out to say good bye. There was a moment when Wildfire cried out, but it was nonsense. Her eyes narrowed thoughtfully, but she let it go in the next moment. Wildfire was sick. There was no point in reading into those words, so she merely shook her head to dismiss it when any eyes wandered to try and meet hers.

When at last Wildfire left the world, it felt for a moment as though all of the air had been sucked away with her. Sound vanished along with it. All of her senses went suddenly numb except for that low whoosh that was her goddaughter disappearing before her eyes. Slowly, the sounds of sobs and whispered words of regret and farewell began to return.

Fin shut her eyes to steady herself, letting that one moment of silence be all the weakness she'd allow herself over Wildfire's loss. At least for this moment. Once she opened them again, it would be to look on a different world. A broken world. A world that she would take it upon herself to repair, no matter what it cost her. Because it was her daughter's world, and Finley owed her little girl and the dear friends that had born her so much more than that.

So while Wildfire stepped forward to meet Fox and Peregrine on the other side, Finley with a glance at Elwood stepped forward to pick up the broken pieces in this one.

Felt like this needed a wrap. Hope no ones minds <3