Sun Mote Copse when it rains, it pours

tags only for reference!

Everything seemed to be coming apart at the seams. As if it wasn't enough that it seemed a lot of wolves weren't feeling the Copse anymore for a home -- the home that Wiffle was buried! And Uncle Colt, too! -- Eljay hadn't seen Weejay in a few days and he was worried sick. He'd been worried sick from the very first moment, but now that time was passing further and further he got more and more worried. What if something had happened to her? It was just another notch on the wall, and all that kept Eljay together right then was that he still felt he needed to stand up and fight for his home, for this home, to keep it together; and be there for Elfie, even though Elfie didn't seem to necessarily want Eljay to be there for him at all.

It was stupid, perhaps, that he ever thought he could be a father at all. He was failing. Hard, fast.

@Elfie didn't even want him there, held no respect for him, and was hurting really badly. Eljay could tell that he was, but he just didn't know what to do about it. He was helpless to watch his son push away his feelings and shield himself from the world, including his own family. Eljay was just at a complete loss of what he could do for his son, and everything he tried seemed to only push Elfie further away and written off as being 'smothering'.

@Weejay had left the territory a few times even though he said that she shouldn't. Even thoug he berated her each time she returned. Even though he begged her not to leave again. She did it even though she was a sweet soul who was a bit more in touch with all of these feelings than Elfie seemed to be; who had weeped and grieved over her mother. But even she could not stand being around Eljay any longer.

To be so unwanted by his children broke Eljay to the core but he knew he couldn't let anyone see. He knew that all he could do was struggle on, for his children, for his family, for the pack; for whatever was left of all of those things.

A light drizzle accompanied Eljay as he trotted through the Copse as fall fell. Weejay! he bellowed for what felt like the thousandth time. Weej! He remembered so vividly being shown around by Wiffle the first time, all excited wiht her new home and finding this beautiful picturesque copse for them to live in. Weejay- the shout fell short, turned into more of a pleaded huff, as his hoarse voice gave in. He remembered so vividly playing with the children when they were tiny potatoes, with Wiffle by his side, looking to a bright future. And now here he was, in a rainy copse that didn't hold the same appeal, but was still his family's home and he couldn't let it fall apart, he just couldn't, had to be strong, had to keep his shoulders hunched.

Tears mingled with the drizzle as Eljay choked out a few sobs and he bit his teeth together, trying his hardest to be strong, but it was as it was every time he tried...

His best just wasn't good enough.

Sugar had fallen asleep in a patch of wildflowers (none purple, of course) while trying her best to study and catalog each in her mind. But when it began to rain lightly, she stirred and blinked awake. She rose from her nest and realized, with a touch of dismay, that she'd rolled in her sleep and crushed some of the blossoms. There was no setting them to rights, so she only sighed softly and stepped carefully onto more open ground.

That was when she realized it hadn't only been the drizzle that had woken her; there was a voice off in the distance, calling for Weejay. Purely out of habit, Sugar turned back, bent and clipped a flower (a yellow lily of some variety), then padded toward the caller's voice. She was pretty sure it was her elder brother (and Weejay's father), Eljay.

When she found him, he looked utterly downtrodden, as did most of the adults lately. Sugar paused, head cocked as she regarded him. The whole scenario suddenly reminded her of the unpleasant altercation with Elfie and Bronco the other day. She nearly bit through the lily's stem as she recollected Elfie's behavior. She knew that he was Eljay's child too, yet so very different from the soft-spoken and sweet Weejay.

Stepping forward, Sugar inserted herself in her older brother's line of sight, then set the flower beside her white toes. "Why is Elfie so angory?" she found herself asking.

Eljay hadn't expected to receive company so when he heard a voice he startled slightly. He quickly sniffed away the last of the tears; it didn't always work, but company had always managed to make it easier to inhale his tears and push his emotions back into the dark depths of his subconscious where they were left to fester. Eljay looked up at Sugar, who stood there with a flower by her paws.

She asked him a question that had Elfie's name in it. Eljay blinked away the last tears, though it was hard to tell they were tears at all considering the light rain that mingled with them. What? He blinked a few times, but then the question registered. Why was Elfie angry? A stark reminder of how awfully Eljay was doing as a father, he thought ho himself.

I... I don't know. If only he knew. If only he knew how to fix this. Have you seen Weejay? he asked and chewed his bottom lip, just hoping she had. All the while his mind just kept reminding him, over and over, of what a bad father he was.

Her lips pursed when Eljay said he didn't know. He asked if she'd seen Weejay and Sugar thought back to the last time she'd seen her cousin, in passing. It had been yesterday or the day before, so she shook her head and replied, "No." She paused and glanced sideways, noting how the rain made everything appear misty, before looking back at her older brother. "I can help you look though."

But before they went searching for Weejay, Sugar wondered, "Do you know what kind of flower this is?" She made a sort of fist with her tiny paw, pointing a single white toe at the Calochortus luteus. Sugar saw that little glistening drops of rain were pearling on its mottled yellow petals. The moisture made the splashes of red toward the bell's bottom look a lot like blood.

Eljay chewed his lip, feeling guilty that he couldn't give Sugar an honest answer. Part of his answer was truthful, of course; he didn't know precisely why Elfie was angry, but he knew parts of it. Telling Sugar about Wiffle's passing didn't seem right, though. She was still too young to grasp it and Eljay wasn't too sure he wanted to share right now, either. Still, something about not being able to tell her the truth bothered him deeply, even if she was just a child still. Besides, telling her why Elfie was angry in part would mean he'd have to admit he was the worst father in the history of all fathers ever; and he was not quite ready to do that.

She then said she hadn't seen Weejay, but offered to help look. Eljay smiled -- though in his current state, it looked more like a grimace -- as he said, Thanks, Suge, that's really sweet of you. He wished he knew where even to begin, but then decided that they should just keep looking everywhere in the Copse, see if there were trails. Even though he knew it unlikely that they'd find a trail in this weather and because he'd already looked seemingly everywhere, there was some solace in searching.

Eljay hadn't even properly noticed the flower at Sugar's paws and he blinked at her question. Then he looked down at where she pointed and saw the beautiful flower. Oh, he said, blinking. It's very pretty. It's a... I think it's a lily. A yellow lily?

"Aye," she agreed with his assessment about the flower's aesthetic. He guessed that it was a yellow lily and Sugar nodded. "Yellow lily," she murmured, as if filing that away in a catalog in the back of her mind. She plucked up the dewy bloom and set it aside, between the upthrust roots of a nearby oak, intending to come back and collect it later.

She then turned back to her elder brother and looked up at him expectantly, blinking away the misty drizzle as she told him, "Okay, let's find Weejay."

Eljay smiled tensely at Sugar's attentive attitude, thinking it nice that she was already so studious even though she was yet young. It was good promise. He wondered, Are you studying flowers? Admittedly, his mind was way off, or he would have instantly helped Sugar Glider along a bit more. But right now he was worried for Weejay and he wanted to find his daughter rather than study plants with another of the pack's youth.

Sugar agreed to come search and Eljay nodded. He nervously chewed his lip as he started to search through the copse, while he wondered out loud, Do you want to become a healer, that you're studying herbs? Or is it just because it's pretty? They could always use more healers, though it was also good to have someone who just knew names and uses of plants.

Or, he supposed, who just got pretty flowers to cheer up the pack mates.

Sugar nodded mutely when her older brother questioned her about flowers. She was interested in all plants (except purple ones...), truthfully. They fascinated her, although she couldn't really say why. It hadn't really occurred to her that there might be uses for them that went beyond decorative, so when Eljay mentioned the connection between healing and herbs, she paused and cocked her head at him.

"What does a healer do?" Sugar asked, though she didn't give him a chance to reply before guessing, "Help others when they get hurt?" Now that was something she could appreciate. But that brought up all sorts of questions, chief among them, "How?"

It hadn't occurred to Eljay that his words might be something of a mystery to Sugar. She went on to ask what a healer did and even then he didn't fully realise that she might not see the connection between herbs and healing. He might've explained in a bit more detail or a bit simpler if he had realised, but instead he said: Yes, that's right. They make sure everyone is alright. Eljay smiled, figuring that was something that his sister could appreciate. It was what had drawn Eljay to wanting to learn about plants in the first place. He wasn't the best at it all, but he tried his darnest and he learned new things along the way. And, of course, taught what he knew to others.

Sugar asked how as if it was some sort of magic that drove others to heal others. Eljay felt a little less twisted in his gut by Sugar's innocent questions, glad that he could teach her a few things. Well, one way is through herbs, Eljay said nonchalantly, in a tone that implied this was basic knowledge (he still didn't quite realise it might not be). But also more basic stuff, like knowing how to clean a wound. When someone gets hurt, it helps to lick an open wound to make sure it gets clean before it heals up.

His explanation fascinated Sugar, who'd forgotten entirely about the rainy weather and the search for Weejay. She pondered how exactly herbs could be used to heal, then nodded sagely to herself when she considered Eljay's remark about cleaning wounds. That part clicked with her more than the rest, though Sugar hoped to learn everything she could about how plants could be used to treat the ill and injured.

Sugar opened her mouth to press one of dozens of questions on her elder brother, then suddenly remembered why they were out here in the wet weather. Her mouth clapped shut, then reopened as she called out, "Weejay!" Her voice wasn't very loud, so she raised it a little as she repeated her name. "Weejay! Are you out there?"

While they kept an ear out for a response, Sugar's black eyes found Eljay's face again. "Will you teach me?" she queried, "About herbs and healing?"

They continued the search, and Eljay was grateful that Sugar continued to help and called for Weejay. His voice joined in the chorus -- Weejay! -- but there wasn't any response, like every time before. Eljay frowned, and the conversation with Sugar was all that kept him from going crazy.

Sugar asked him suddenly. It took a few seconds to register what she asked, Eljay's mind preoccupied by missing his daughter. What? he said and blinked, and then as the words fell into place, he nodded. Yeah -- I mean -- of course. I would love to teach you, Sugar. Maybe right now his mind was a little preoccupied, but Eljay thought it sweet as well as useful for the pack that Sugar would want to learn about it, too.

He readily agreed to tutor her, though Sugar could see that he was preoccupied by their search. Although she would've been eager to begin otherwise, she merely nodded and saved her enthusiasm for later. There would be plenty of time for Eljay to teach his little sister everything he knew. In the meantime, Sugar could tell just how much he wanted to find his daughter.

"Weejay! Weejay!" the tiny youth called at the top of her voice, which wasn't very loud at all. Still no answer came and her deep black eyes sought Eljay's face, wondering if he would continue wandering around and calling her name until the wayward Weejay responded. If that was the case, Sugar steeled herself to stick with him until they found her.

feel free to archive unless you've got any more for thhem to do/talk about! let's do a follow up sometime? :) feel free to assume that Eljay teaches her stuff in the background, too <3

Eljay was grateful for the distraction, but he also really wanted to find Weejay. As if she understood, Sugar continued to call for Weej, and Eljay decided they'd look for her first before the teaching commenced. He'd be a lot less distracted that way, too. Weejay! he called out, his voice hoarse from being out calling for her for so long already. Eljay was feeling pretty desperate, but it was somehow still better to be out searching with someone by his side than alone.