Hideaway Strath Nobody does it like you do
"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
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Ooc — Malia
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Setting: Evening — 17:45
Weather: Fair, clear skies, slightly breezy
Tags: @Leigh

Back dated to June 1st!

Kynareth’s been busy lately, while also being super not busy. Sure he’s been occupied by his pups most of the time. The other bit of his time has been spent on the borders or hunting. Just hoping for some poor souls to stumble into their territory just to he can rip them to shreds. He’s been too antsy lately too, just for that specific reason. Pent up aggression. He wants to sink his teeth into something — or someone — worthy, but the occasion hasn’t risen. 

Now, he moves through the territory, checking to make sure everything’s where it’s supposed to be. Occasionally marking his scent on trees and such to ensure their territory stays unmistakable and strong. Soon his bloodlust will be satisfied, but not yet.
the dragon and her fire
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Each day that passed hadn't been much different than the one before. The only real difference was how Leigh felt. Some days were better, and on others she didn't even feel like walking around the pack's territory. She had spent most of her time with Endre since he had arrived, which had definitely brought some much needed happiness into her life. He brightened each day, and regardless of how she felt physically, she hadn't fallen into that deep hole of regret and sadness since.

But she couldn't say the same when it came to Kynareth. They hadn't spoken for quite awhile now, several weeks, perhaps even months had passed since they last had a real conversation. The woman had no real desire to speak with him, but she knew this meeting would come eventually and all she could do was face the brindle wolf. She had so much to say to him, but deciding whether he was worth the time and energy made her doubt if she'd actually have the courage to do so.
"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
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Kynareth’s unaware of how much time she’s been spending with this Endre. All he knows, is that the man’s exists. Surprisingly, he’s never spoken to him. He’s seen him, but never said a work to him. Not out of distain, but Kyn can’t really put a finger one why he hasn’t; opportunity perhaps?

Either way, as Kyn walks he spots someone much more interesting than Endre. A lonesome Leigh walks by herself. She notices him; he notices her. While she dreads to speak with him, his twin orbs light up slightly at the sight of her. Yet, his auds swivel with uncertainty atop his crown. He knows she hates him. He just knows. He feels it. He suspects it’s because he’s an asshole and likes to kill people. He doesn’t have the slightest idea that part of it is Simmik, his pups, and the fact that he didn’t choose her instead. 

He’s thought about it. If he hadn’t killed that poor girl at their borders, maybe they’d still be okay. It would only be a ticking time bomb until he does shit like that again though. He won’t change. Ever. Not for anyone. Simmik accepted that, but he knows Leigh didn’t — still won’t. 

So he pushes the uncertainty away and pads over to her with a softly forming smile. “Darling,” He greets. “Have you been okay?” He asks rather sweetly. Trying to stay on her good side today.

Contrary to popular belief, he doesn’t like fighting with her. Leigh just had a lot of things on her mind about him — none necessarily good either — but Kyn has to defend his own doesn’t he? Not today. If she fights with him, he’s going to take it, shut up, and listen.
the dragon and her fire
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Leigh wasn't entirely sure if she outright hated Kynareth. She held hatred in her heart for him, that was for sure, but it sat alongside several other emotions as well. He was the first face she saw after coming to Teekons after all, and no matter how much she wished she could just turn her back on him and leave, she couldn't bring herself to do so. She had already forgiven him for so many things, all she wanted now was an apology instead of excuses.

She'd be lying if she said she hadn't considered hurting him in other ways. Insults rolled off his back like water rolls of a duck's feathers. But insulting those he cared about? Maybe that'd get under his skin. Leigh wasn't Sasha, she wasn't interested in running after people and tearing them apart. But she had to admit, despite not harboring any real dislike towards Simmik, a little part of her thought the white wolf was dumb as fuck for throwing her morals out the window and into the garbage just because Kynareth was too emotionally stunted to give a shit about people. Of course this wasn't Simmik's fault, but Leigh was just generally disgusted with their strange relationship.

Now as the tiger approached, she was tempted to spit at him and leave to go find Endre. Endre was everything Kynareth wasn't, and it was pathetic that the brindled wolf had lowered her standards so low that someone just being decent and kind was a rarity.

"I've been feeling like shit. Ever since your bitch of a wife tore a chunk out of my leg the universe decided that it'd just keep me in misery. Thanks, for the invisible flowers and "get well" card, by the way."
"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
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He could feel the glower before it came. Leigh: a ticking time bomb when in his presence. Or she is now, anyway. He wonders if he had done a few things differently if she wouldn’t hate him so. 

The brindled man only takes a step or two closer before her voice breaks out through the silence of nature’s song. The birds chirping, wind rustling the trees; so soft. Leigh’s words — harsh. His ears shift backwards as he allows her to speak. They surprise him. His wife bit a chunk out of her leg?? Instantly, his eyes shift to look for the wound. He finds it, scarred over and hardly growing fur. It must’ve happened long ago. Yet, her words confuse him. Kyn and his single celled brain automatically thinks Simmik. She did that? He can’t see it happening.

Confusion is apparent on his features when he meets her eyes again. “I didn’t know...” He says back, expression pensive. “Are you saying Simmik did that?” He asks to confirm, Sasha doesn’t even come to his mind. Now if Leigh had said ex wife, he would’ve guessed right the first time.
the dragon and her fire
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A part of Leigh wasn't even surprised by the misunderstanding. Perhaps she could have been a little more clear, but knowing how many brain cells Kynareth lacked almost guaranteed confusion. In an attempt to reassure the tiger before conjuring actual words, she shook her head in response.

"No, not Simmik you dumbass. I'm fairly sure you had her locked up when this happened anyway. And despite the fact that you might as well marry this entire pack since you fuck everything that moves, I'm referring to Sasha, your first wife."

She was tempted to say more. Not to start an argument, but to more fully express the hurt Kynareth had caused. For so long he seemed completely oblivious, and maybe it was unfair to expect so much from a wolf she had barely spoken to for some time. But she knew he was capable of paying attention, caring about someone other than himself, so the fact that he didn't seem to care about her much was insulting.

"I'm not even sure if I'd consider Simmik to be your wife. Maybe, in some other reality, I might have rooted for you two. But instead, because of your own fuck ups, you deemed me too difficult to deal with so you gave up and went searching elsewhere. Hell, it almost seems like Simmik walked right into your trap on purpose."

Leigh was bitter, that was for sure. The woman knew that life wouldn't always make sense. That people generally suck and do idiotic things. But for a wolf like Kynareth, one who had shown her over and over the willpower and obsession he possessed when fighting, leading, or fucking, to then show absolutely zero strength when it came to saving their relationship was somewhat pathetic and equally as hurtful.

"You run back to Simmik after she denies you more than once. You fucking move your entire pack because Nyra messed up and fucking yeeted a child. You even let Sasha back into your life after what she did. But one fight with me, and it's over, all because you couldn't get a piece of this ass."
"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
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A shake of her head. No, not Simmik you dumbass. Oh. Then that leaves Sasha. Something he’s not surprised happened with the husky mutt. It’s later confirmed once Leigh allows a few easy insults to roll off her tongue. Kyn doesn’t say a word.

It’s her next words that get him. She doesn’t consider Simmik his wife. She says he didn’t want to be with her because she was too difficult. Then the third paragraph of words come from her mouth. All while he stands there passively just thinking about what she’s saying. Trying to burn it into his memory and replay it right in front of her. She’s jealous of Simmik because Leigh wanted to be with him. Everything is much clearer now. Yet, things are still blurry. 

His brows furrow softly. Because of his own fuck ups. First he decides to address Sasha. His tone is almost cold, but matter of fact. “I planned on killing Sasha. That’s why I brought her back with me.” He concludes darkly. 

He moves on to the next subject. “So, because of my own fuck ups, you don’t want to be with me.” He says it more of a statement and not like a question. “You honestly think I wouldn’t have kept trying?” He wonders, voice edging closer to irritation. “It was because I told you I’m going to be this way for the rest of my god forsaken life. I’m going to kill and torture others, wreck havoc, bring misery.” He trails off, eyes softening as he looks to her. “The reason I’m with Simmik right now and not you, is because she accepted that.” Why would he be with someone who wouldn’t accept him for him? 

He moves closer. “I would’ve chased you, but since we killed that shewolf at our borders all you want to do is fight with me; insult me. I don’t want you to hate me and I’m willing to try harder, but you have to accept how I am.” 

He gives a heartless laugh then, a ‘what can I really do’ smile coming to his maw, but it lacks any signs of mirth. “I’d fucking grovel at your feet just to have you forgive me, but I cannot change —
I will not change.”
the dragon and her fire
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She is at a loss for words. How would she respond to this? Kynareth was always so good at backing people up into a corner. Giving ultimatums or unwilling to budge. But she was too hurt to not say something in return. No matter how stupid or incoherent it sounded, she had to say something. In regards to Sasha, overtime she had figured on her own that Kynareth only let her back in for selfish reasons. It was somewhat stupid considering he never went through with such a plan, and it was even more stupid that it cost the woman a leg but the tiger waddled away without a scratch.

As for everything else he had to say, she had heard it before. The whole "I won't change" speech and "just accept me the way I am" bullshit. He was always so eager to demand but gave nothing in return. She doubted he could even offer a good fuck and just bragged about himself because he was unaware of how awful he really was in bed but was too pathetic to admit it just because he so desperately needed an ego boost. And all of his partners couldn't say anything because they were too busy laughing. Perhaps it was a harsh and unnecessary thought, but Leigh was proud of being able to conjure such an idea anyways.

"You keep saying that you picked Simmik because she has accepted you. You indirectly imply that I am somehow lesser or disposable because I don't feel the same. But she doesn't accept you. You just brainwashed her long enough and knocked her up with your pups. And even if I had accepted you, I don't believe that you would have picked me anyway. Simmik is your special person, the wolf who you first saw when you came to this place."

It hurt to admit such a thing, but Leigh knew it was true. Even if Kynareth wasn't willing to admit it, or wasn't even aware what he felt such a way, she knew that he still would have most-likely picked his current wife regardless. The way he spoke about her was evidence enough. Kynareth was a murderer and Simmik was easy prey. What more could he ask for?

"And you would have chased me?" She took a moment to breathe. She had never been much of a cryer but if she didn't take a moment for herself her voice would shake and it'd just be an embarrassing mess. "When? When would you have chased me? After our date? After we moved? Or were you just reserving "chasing after me" for the moment when I destroyed myself for you?"

Arguing with someone like Donovan was difficult. Arguing with Kynareth was even more of a struggle, for that stranger of a wolf didn't even possess a fraction of the kindness Donovan Azura held. She knew they were the same person, they shared the same body and same voice. She knew that it was technically Kynareth who she saw near the mountains. But she refused to give a murderer the credit for the happiness she received.

"I would have chased you. I did chase you and you just never noticed. You've done terrible things to me and I still can't let you go. You're a fucking infection. I don't need to accept you because I would have still loved you. You are my special person, Donovan. You are my Simmik. But you say you aren't willing to change, so I suppose someone who is incapable of love such as yourself can never learn to love me anyways. I forgive you, but I doubt you even care because someone like you doesn't care about earning forgiveness and you never will."
"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
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Ooc — Malia
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Leigh starts strong. Her words hitting him like a freight train — cutting deep. His ears press to the back of his skull in defense at what she says about Simmik and then herself. She mentions brainwashing Simmik and that instantly gets under his skin, making the Grandmaster bristle under her judgmental gaze. No. Simmik loved him before all that. He knows it. So he steels himself for her next onslaught of words. 

And you would have chased me? A breath then, a shaky intake of air betrays Leigh’s anger for hurt. He feels his irritation crack a bit at that. 

I would have chased you. I did chase you and you just never noticed. You've done terrible things to me and I still can't let you go. You're a fucking infection. I don't need to accept you because I would have still loved you. You are my special person, Donovan. You are my Simmik. But you say you aren't willing to change, so I suppose someone who is incapable of love such as yourself can never learn to love me anyways. I forgive you, but I doubt you even care because someone like you doesn't care about earning forgiveness and you never will.

Those are the words that break his resolve — that crack his mask of indifference. Leigh’s anger — her hate — all stemmed from her love … for him.

With dark auds still pressed back, he hesitates. Muscles twitch like he’s about to move, but he doesn’t. He opens his mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Eyes that twin the midday sun widen, revealing clarity and still so many other questions. He feels like shit. He feels so many things. Back then, when Simmik hated him, he spent so much time with Leigh. Her fiery eyes were bright and looked at him with adoration and friendship. Now, all she has for him is hate — pent up and released — born from her unrequited love and jealousy. 

He doesn’t hesitate this time. His muscles move before his consciousness can catch up. Striding the short distance towards her with purpose, he doesn’t have anger or hate in his eyes; he has the opposite — longing, realization, regret, sadness. His body makes contact with hers, head and neck first as he passionately rubs himself against her. A paw to her side forces her to the ground as softly as he can and his large body encompasses her own smaller one. He doesn’t press his weight down on her, he leaves her an escape if she desires it, but his thick forearms settle on each side of her head as he shrouds her in affection. 

Nothing but raw emotion on his handsome face, he fervently rasps a dark tongue to her face. Along her muzzle, cheeks, nose, ears, all while his paws cradle her. He’s horribly passionate, such strong emotions flowing through him and he doesn’t even know what to do with himself. He doesn’t even know what to do once he gets up. He’s ready to take Leigh’s bites and snaps if she doesn’t want him — just as well as he’s ready to take her affection if he’s lucky enough to get it. 

Why didn’t she just tell him sooner?
the dragon and her fire
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What was she supposed to do now? As the tiger approaches, there is no fear in her heart. She knows he would never hurt her and even if he tried, she'd go down fighting and take his jaw with her. But there doesn't seem to be any anger or frustration in his eyes. It's more so confusion and longing. Reading a wolf like Kynareth was always difficult, for his range of emotions, at least ones expressed were limited. Despite that, in this moment, his face was quite clear and the vulnerability was not only refreshing but sweet.

She falls to the ground with ease and no hesitation. Orange eyes meeting a yellow pair. Leigh wasn't sure what to think or what to do. Giving into Kynareth's desires wasn't something she was particularly excited to do. But she still wanted to savor the moment, the release of hatred and rebuilding of a connection.

"You still aren't getting a piece of this ass. But just... just hold me, okay?"
"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
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She goes willingly, which surprises him severely. He’d almost expected her to snap teeth at his face, leave scabs and bruises where her teeth hit. She doesn’t though and it makes a warm feeling bloom in his chest. So much so, he keeps rasping his tongue over her. 

Until her voice meets his ears, meek and unsure. And her words, oh her words, almost make him want to laugh. He drops his weight a bit further into her, mindful not to squish her, but relaxing into her. Dipping his chin to his chest he laps at her muzzle once more before burying his face in her neck. He can’t help it, he releases a huff of breath from his nose that could easily be considered a laugh.

“That’s fine. I’ll take whatever you’ll give me, dear.” His words are horribly soft, genuine, but not meant to be dirty or flirtatious in anyway. 

He means it. Any form of affection that’s not hatful, he would soak up. Take whatever she’d give. He’s desperate for her attention at this point. Burying his snout in her fur, pressing himself down to her in a soft embrace, he even laps tentatively at her neck a few times. He’s soaking up the moment, but he’s about to break the silence with a terribly serious question.

What does he have to do for him to be forgiven? He cannot change the past, he cannot just leave Simmik. What are his options? Change? He’s afraid she might say so. So he stays quiet, merely soaking up her affections like he’d never get the opportunity to do it again. Hopefully he would.
the dragon and her fire
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At first, the woman is still recovering from such a state of shock. The constant switching of intense emotions was exhausting, though there was also relief, finally confronting Kynareth and watching his stale exterior slowly crack. She welcomes the nice embrace, savoring such a moment for she was sure it'd never happen again. The tiger was a father now, he wouldn't have as much time for anyone including Leigh herself.

She remembered a saying she heard once, that forgiveness wasn't for the one being forgiven, but for the one forgiving. She had held a grudge for so long, and finally letting that all go, finally forgiving Kynareth for all he had done, indeed lifted a weight from her heart.

As for what he could do, Leigh didn't know either. If she did, she'd demand her wish from him in an instant. But she wasn't sure what she wanted from her old friend, so perhaps he'd have to wait for an answer. The woman knew that he couldn't just leave Simmik, she didn't want that anyways. Simmik was an innocent soul, and Leigh couldn't bare the thought of taking love away from the white wolf. But there was also a certain selfishness she possessed, so despite wanting to leave Kynareth's mate out of their ordeal, she couldn't help but want him for herself.

Leigh wasn't after Kynareth's love. She found love elsewhere, with Endre. And she wouldn't give that up for anyone. But that didn't mean she didn't still care for the brindled wolf, for he was the first face she saw after arriving at Teekons. Their relationship was a strange one. It was more so that, Leigh didn't wish to be with Kynareth, she had feelings for someone else now, so although she didn't think they were meant to be in this life, she had a feeling that perhaps they'd meet again in the next life. Maybe then they could be happy.

So for now, she didn't want Kynareth to change. She only hoped that once they had both died and their souls passed onto their next journey, that then, maybe he'd finally learn to care enough to grow as a person. Or at least, to save them both from heartbreak, that Leigh would finally learn to give up on him.
"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future."
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She leans into his embrace a s the moment is horribly nice. It’s something he thought he’d never get from her again in his entire life. Back then they were so innocent, floating around on another with a mutual attraction. The his weakness came back to bite him — Simmik. She came back to him, albeit unconsensually, but she stuck by him after she learned of his feelings. Yet, he could tell Leigh fancied him and he her. If Simmik had never come back, if he had never made that fateful decision, then he would’ve been stuck to Leigh’s side instead of Simmik’s. He would’ve gotten over her eventually. 

So finally he sits up and looks at her, canary orbs terribly soft. “Do you forgive me?” He asks lowly.