Ankyra Sound eros, giver of pain

beneath the cliffs there was the sound, and it was wrapped in the same blackpine which girdled sapphique's fine borderlands.
and inside the weald of sea-trees was a clearing, lush and sunlit. here it was that erzulie lay with @Jorunn, both of them for the time being caught in the immutable moment which comprises a sapphic entangling —
that a breath or sigh or stir might start things once more —
she faced jorunn with her cheek pressed to the emerald sedges. "i am going to step down as obisidian. soon."

delight and warmth and —

she breathed in the perfume of herself on erzulie, relished the way the sun warmed the cinnamon of the woman. everything had felt perfect in a way it had not with anybody else. how silly, she thought, to not have realized she could love a woman sooner. why had she denied herself such?

but her copper eyes turned with a thoughtfulness to the way the woman spoke. jorunn stayed close, nose brushing along tendrils of well tended to furs that padded the chest of erzulie.

will you say why?

"because it feels odd to lead wit'out rosalyn."
when this began, erzulie told herself she would make no spaces with jorunn that omitted her wife. and though it still felt some way to utter her name in this bower, she said it all the same and with confidence.
and then all of a sudden, her face contorted. she looked skyward as the tears came. "i want to be t'ere to take care of her. to be wit her." the seawife's voice remained steady even as the silent weeping went on, realization, perhaps even panic.

it made sense, without a second thought she closed her eyes in silent understanding. then there was a tidal wave in erzulie that spurred jorunn to lean alongside her. as if jorunn might find herself under the woman's skin once more, but this time to soothe rather than burn.

i hear, she whispered softly, resting an ear to the ribcage of the obsidian. she is your soul, you hers. this jorunn knew and had heard time and time again. she did not have any desire to remove such a bond from either woman. it only strengthened her admiration for the both of them.

she would let the woman cry as much as needed, not yet asking her anything else of this until it was all out.

oh, erzulie would allow jorunn close, as close as they both needed. but she refused to let herself lean into the embrace. not this time. not for this reason. she must shoulder this alone as the steadfast devotee to the love shared between herself and rosalyn.
and still it felt disengenous.
erzulie swallowed. she tasted salt. "she is. an' i am not ready to lose her, jorunn."

jorunn had always been here to shoulder sapphique, even before she wore their name.

she had tended to erzulie's search of a lost daughter, she had wore the name of their pack into a mission far from here, she planted her roots deep into the seaside. but the weight of this shifted those roots. strong but not prepared yet for the weight of such and admission.

the situation had seemed laid bare for all to know, but that did not make the expansive truth of it any easier.

a soft sound built in her throat, no words felt to capture the weight of this.

the memory of her is whispered into everything in sapphique. they both knew this. the countless children and grandchildren, the history of the land. she will never be gone but — her own voice hitched, swallowed the thickening of her spit. i know it is not same.

"it feels — sometimes — like she already be fadin'."
she hated to say these words aloud. it felt as though it were some blackened manifestation, as if in giving the fear life it would become true.
she was weeping now; she was sobbing, for it had become too much to bear, and this time she did allow jorunn to cradle her.
did men mourn their lovers in this way? she would not know. but her own grieved alongside her for rosalyn and would be there in the end.
erzulie simply was unsure if her own heart would be able to carry her after that.

the emerald tangled her legs around her now grievous lover. cradling her in the wake of this new wave of tears.

what a terrible thing, she thought and feared. in her mind there was no rosalyn without erzulie and the opposite seemed true too. what a horrible, terrible thing. she clutched her own fear deep away from the surface. there was no need to grieve the grieving.

she tried to gather her own strength and courage to become a pillar against the crashing waves.

you will spend all the time left in the best ways. every dream she has left that can be lived should be, hm? she offered, scooping her nose along erzulie's jaws.

love the new av <3

erzulie let out her breath; she gasped; she nodded, tears flowing, dripping at the corners of her mouth and from her chin. jorunn, dampened first by their liaisons and then her grief; there was some sweet little irony here. 
"we were to take a trip but de children. but — ah. i t'ink it be time to take it."
her eyes said i do not want to leave you.
but the set of her jaw said i will come back.

<333

it is.

she tried not to feel the sting of her own eyes or the weight of erzulie's gaze and jaw. jorunn was her lover, but not the very heartbeat of her soul. she would not dare let lustful moments hinder the remaining of time between wives.

you know things will be fine here — or i make it so. she laughed, a somber sound despite her attempt to prod some lightness in the dark.

it was so much more harsh than what she had thought, the way the relationships wound. the fact that she had two at all. but she and rosalyn had never included fidelity in their expectations of one another.
and jorunn was more than that. what strength the other woman offered, the obsidian found herself happy to take. grateful, even.
"i am going to announce mireille before we go," she said softly. "she may find she be needin' you for help."

mireille!

jorunn found warmth on her face finally. happy to see the spot be filled by another daughter, relieved to see the legacy of sapphique continue to fall to those of rosalyn and erzulie.

then you tell her 'jorunn be here, mind and body.' she instructed with a ghost of a smile. i give her my teeth and my knowledge, whenever.

a lull in her heartbeat as she gazed longingly upon erzulie once more. she would miss the woman something fierce — and some part of her already did, despite their still lingering entanglement.

fade? <3

"oh, jorunn ...!"
tearstained and still heartened, erzulie pulled the other into a steadying embrace.
one cheek pressed to another and their mouths would meet then;
she could scarcely pull herself away, and she did not want to —
— she could stay for a time, a while longer, and unless jorunn spurred her from the blackpine oasis now, her strong arms would bear the woman to the ground once more.
and then she would leave.
and then she would put that strength into her own backbone and march to open the next chapter of her own personal tome.