Dragoncrest Cliffs a wasting of my time

because i'm very emotional and selfish <3
(and if you're too busy this can be turned AW so no worries either way!)

jorunn felt like she walked on the cusp of a new life.

discussions had been held, spring might have her bring new life. yet she had not been blind to what a handful children could be. nor did she have any illusions about it all being carefree. tragedy could easily await.

so selfishly she wanted a distraction from these thoughts. she wanted to cherish herself as she was now. she searched for the scarred form of none other than @Rosalyn — knowing she could not be very far.

appreciate!! I was considering starting one here soon too XD

She wasn't far. Rosalyn had brought down a bird earlier, one that was too slow even to evade her, and was resting contentedly in the shelter of the trees. This winter would be difficult for her but she looked towards it with placid acknowledgement. The pack would see itself through, and come spring, new life would blossom in more ways than one.

She lifted her head and smiled as Jorunn approached, but didn't rise just yet. Instead she shifted in quiet invitation for the other woman to join her.

the auburn woman, resting along a tree.

it warmed her greatly and she wasted no time in joining her.

back turned to the world so she may face rosalyn. she could not stop the near girlish look upon her face, or the way her tail tapped against the cold earth. tentatively she reached in, wondering if rosalyn might be open to accepting any form of affection so boldly.

Rosalyn lifted her chin with a soft sound of amusement and contentment, accepting the affection easily. Jorunn had become an easy companion - and while Rosalyn did not know her as completely as she knew her wife, it was enough. In some ways things were simpler here too.

I plan on wasting the day away shamelessly, for the record. Rosalyn said with amusement, tone teasing. You can stay if you don't plan to tell on me. She knew as well as Jorunn that no one would dare mind.

She felt better than some days, but there was still an off sense that pervaded. Today she thought it best not to push herself.

then we will not tell on one another.

she laughed, feeling warm and breathless. shamelessly (as they had addressed) she dared to stretch, and lounge alongside the ruby.

she knew that when they had spoken of spring, there had been a well of feelings. yet she dared not unearth those today. no. for once she wanted to set aside her thoughts of spring.

i want to pamper you.

her eyes searched the face of her other lover (for that was what it was, she decided silently in her heart, for her loving came in many forms) eagerly.

Against the chill, Jorunn's warmth was extremely welcome against her. She was glad that the other woman was keen to play along and seemed to have time to spare. She never minded to pass moments in the day alone but company was always welcome.

It was strange, still, to hear those words. And perhaps wrong to encourage them. Despite the way she'd come to embrace the companionship now three of them shared, there was a voice that asked silently what she was thinking. A prickle of guilt when she contemplated the future... tossed aside when she focused on the now. The latter was so much easier.

I hardly know what that means. She replied, delighted and strangely shy. It was only a partial jest. Pirates aren't the type for finer things. Not that they couldn't appreciate them.

It wasn't a dismissal... but a tentative invitation. With Jorunn, Erzulie shared something that Rosalyn yearned for... but a space within her still withheld. A space that knew the more she leaned forward, the farther she dove... the more she would drown in the end. There was already so much for her to lose. How much more could she bear?

she was giddy, delighted.

rosalyn gave her things that erzulie did not. not that either did not satisfy, only they were different sides of the coin she kept close.

then will you tell me what this pirate desires?

her voice a lulling coo. eyelashes intentionally batted for a dramatic flair. she could not stop the soft curling of lips into a smile.

I don't think she knows.

The only response that would be honest, but Rosalyn finished the statement by combing her teeth gently over the fur at the base of the other woman's ear.

Perhaps she knew more than she thought. Maybe you could show me. It was quiet, a statement despite its nature as a question. Rosalyn still would not be surprised if she faced rejection at any moment - to be mistaken in the desire in the other woman's eyes, the attentions she gave. She hoped she was. She hoped even more that she wasn't.

if i assumed too much, i can edit :D just figured a timeskip might work best? <3

that is what it means to pamper you.

her voice a warm tease as she reached to delicately groom tufted cheeks. the other woman was welcomed at her ear. she was welcomed always.

——————

however long it may have been, did not feel long enough. it was why she hoped to lay tangled, tired and warm. washed in a brilliant million feelings all at once.

humming a soft song in the back of her throat as she worked along seasalt tangles at the pirate's chest.

<3!

Rosalyn was not a stranger to this kind of attention, but to receive it from someone new stoked her in different ways.  It had been the same each time she and Jorunn shared moments.  Erzulie would not mind any more than she did, and Rosalyn continued to marvel at the amount the woman before her gave without asking.  She wondered, not for the first time, how long she would stay.

After she rested against her, wonderfully content.  It would be easy to slip into slumber as Jorunn tousled her chest. Instead she played with the rise of the other woman's shoulder. I knew you were a siren, she murmured gently. She was ensorcelled as any sailor might be.

rosalyn's voice, warmed by their time together, was music to jorunn's ears. some part of her wished greatly for erzulie here too. another part found something even more enchanting in the time spent one-on-one.

me? she laughed lowly against the woman's chest. what does a siren do?

Rosalyn smiled into the soft fur that she rested against. They ensnare men and lure them to their demise. When they wish to. Fortunately, we aren't men. And fortunately, Rosalyn knew Jorunn could be trusted implicitly.

The draw, however, was comparable. She could drown here.

It brought spring to her mind though, and that in turn made her wonder who Jorunn would find when the time came. She would help in any way she could - but she was not sure what that would entail. She'd already disappointed, in some ways. She would need to find other routes by which to return the favor she was being given here. It felt less and less right, to take so much.

she could not stop herself from thinking of a man in particular. blood on her tongue.

but here in this moment it was words for rosalyn. where no man could ever even scratch the surface of competing.

and i am glad we are not. she laughed tiredly — and she did not know their thoughts briefly aligned, as she considered men. it is a worry i have of spring. men. the word sour despite the softness she spoke with.

Rosalyn rested her head against the shoulder and watched as Jorunn spoke. First she agreed, then she echoed her other thoughts and the pirate smiled with understanding.

Mireille asked me about the same thing. I told her no man would ever deserve her, but if she wanted, she could find one who was kind. But to make sure they had no interest in staying or anything that came after. It's a pain that we need them. She'd never enjoyed choosing and always wished they could be cut entirely from the process. It was a joke, she imagined, on some gods' part.

Have you had men before? She asked it simply, barely realizing it could be considered personal.

but kind men might feel guilt, she thought.

or maybe she was projecting. knowing that if she gave somebody a blessing of children and wandered away, she'd feel guilt. jorunn was not a man. she could never be one.

she thought of her once dionysus.

erzulie found me once. angry at a man, shortly after i find sapphique. i had been with him away from the sea. voice hushed, telling a story that felt forbidden for as much as she tried to keep the thoughts away. having never seen his face since then.

then i drove him away with teeth and blood when he found the coast, belittled me. for he was no good man at all.

Rosalyn listened quietly, then looked at her and smiled. There was a slight wicked edge to it. I hadn't considered it, but if you find one like him, this time you'd be the one belittling him. They only have one thing they're good for, after all. She said it with no shame and easy conviction. Time had only served to prove it.

Our fangs are yours. If they insisted on trying to push themselves further, Rosalyn would relish the chance to prove it. It had been far too long since she had a bit of fun.

there were no words for the warmth that rosalyn filled her with in that moment. nothing could compare to it. the sense of security and ease.

"our fangs are yours."

she did not speak on the softness that overcome her face and gaze. only sought to affectionately, and appreciatively, press kisses to the scarred woman in a peppering manner.

you are so wonderful.

Rosalyn smiled. So are you. She meant it. Jorunn deserved a lot, perhaps even more than she and her wife were capable of giving, but still she returned everything and then some. She’d done so much for them both.

The men I found, I never got anything more from. Eventually I forgot them entirely. Rosalyn added, wondering if her experience would help to allay some of the concern. Children are a woman’s right, and theirs to raise as they choose. He would have whatever place you chose to give him. No more, no less.

She had never known, in this way, that motherhood was a thing that she had wanted. The seasons had decided for her and while she didn’t regret it, she did wonder at times if she had been enough. Especially in the case of their elder children. She closed her eyes, took a breath.

he will have no place. this she already knew and figured her mind could not be changed in any way! they will have all in sapphique that they need. no man could add to that. she felt this deeply. if the children had want for manly figures (or were men) there were faces in sapphique she trusted to be better than an outsider.

sobo and quennell.

you and erzulie are in my mind too much for me to think on men long. for jorunn's eyes wandered no more when she had both sea women alongside her. nor was there want in her heart for much of anything.

besides children, of course.

At the mention, Rosalyn’s conversation with Erzulie rose in her mind again. Perhaps what she’d decided wasn’t selfless - but was, instead, selfish fear. It wasn’t fair to what they shared or what they had, and more, it drew further lines between them. She thought she would have said the same of Erzulie’s children, should she have more… but this wasn’t true, she now knew. The choice would have been her wife’s.

So the choice would be Jorunn’s.

I’ve been thinking. It was unfair to tell you what your children would know me as. Rosalyn looked at her fondly. I would understand if you still agree. But if you don’t, I will be what you think best. A mother. A grandmother. A caretaker.

Rosalyn hoped that this continued to be enough. If she wished for a marriage of her own someday, a family beyond elderly women and shared moments, the pirate wouldn’t blame her. But she would leave a hole in her wake, one that Rosalyn hadn’t expected when she first proposed her terms, all those months ago.

oh!

she felt breathless suddenly. overcome by the grand emotion of knowing that rosalyn would allow her this too. this honor to say what her children might know the pirate as.

i know if i ask for too much, her voice felt hitched in the back of her throat, as if held back by her heart and mind. she had not thought rosalyn unreasonable that day but that had not meant she felt no hurt. no desire. but i think they should know you as they will know me. as a mother.

her eyes had become wet, knowing that she asked a great deal of the woman.

Rosalyn knew she’d chosen the right answer the moment she saw emotion overtake the other woman. She’d seen the hurt when she withheld before, but she hadn’t known if it had settled or had lingered. This was important to Jorunn - she was important - and the knowledge of that carved itself into the pirate’s heart in a way something hadn’t managed for years.

Rosalyn moved to draw her closer in an embrace, shifting herself so that she would be the support for a time. Never too much. She reassured, then pressed her lips to Jorunn’s cheek.

Three mothers. They really will never want for anything. And she would be a mother again.

she tucked herself tightly against rosalyn. head nestled between jaw and neck, finding a world of comfort within.

three mothers. all was whole and her heart settled finally for it. knowing that there would not be a divide between rosalyn and them. it was good to know the scarlet pirate would be mother too, that they would know her as they should.

they will want for family name. asking, asking, asking! greedy had she become for comfort and family. i have none to give them, none to pass on. a pause as her heart raced softly all over again. i have not asked erzulie what they will wear, if she has thoughts.

and here she shared something first and private with rosalyn.

Rosalyn held her, close, content in the warmth and the resolution. She felt easier now that her denial wasn’t a weight she carried. She’d known ever since that Jorunn deserved more.

Names were easy. If they were going to be mothers together, then their children would be siblings. Rosalyn knew she could speak for both she and Erzulie on this. Her wife would feel the same.

They could take the name our children usually take. Dahomey is Erzulie’s, Rivaini is mine. Or, if you wanted your own, you could start something new. Her name had never been the part of her she worried about carrying forward. She didn’t even remember the ones who gave it to her.

bountiful and blessed was she.

given rosalyn as a mother for her children and given names for them in turn too. it would feel fitting that they should share the name of their mothers!

it did not feel right to turn a new page yet. she wished for them to be theirs. cloaked under the banner of family and sapphique. i would like them to have those names.

them. she knew not how many there would be, who they might be, what they might be. only that they would have three mothers and sapphique.

i have much love for you, rosalyn.

whispered in the thicket of ruby fur.

perhaps it did not need to be spoken, but it felt important. here and now.

before it was too late.