The Sentinels Make the clock reverse

Maybe @Kirain ??

Solenya felt a little restless today, much more than she normally felt—it probably had much to do with the rumble in her belly, signaling her hunger. She had been so focused on putting her scent along the borders, her basic needs were last on her mind and a bit neglected.

Mouth also dry, she would seek a stream in her search for food.

Some time ago, she had stumbled on a bubbling brook, hidden by luscious lily bushes on its banks. It was not far from where she stood now; thankfully, the water spoke loud enough for her to hear and she found the cool liquid once again. She drank generously, feeling the cold hit her core.

When she was younger, her father would take her scouting, teaching her ways of traveling and making note of landmarks. Not only that, but he also taught her to follow water; it would bring her where she needed to be, as with all living things. And, it was that teaching that gave her direction now, eyes watching for something to hunt.

Well… she wasn’t exactly building a shining track record within the Sentinels. Why was connecting so hard? Had she really become that out of touch? That broken?

Kirain lay sprawled at the edge of a quiet riverbank, her aching body too weary to move any further. With a sigh, she turned her gaze to the two small treasures before her: a piece of teal sea glass, gifted by a dame who had shared wisdom with grace, and a glittering shell from a young lad bursting with life and hope.

She smiled faintly, thinking of them both, wondering where the tides had carried them. Hopefully to brighter futures. Her heart wished them well, wherever they were, building the lives they had once spoken of with such eager eyes.

But then came the thoughts she always tried to outrun, of her two closest companions. Gone. The word abandoned echoed in her mind like a cruel refrain. Her chest tightened.

Slowly, she lowered her head until her jaw met the cool earth, a heavy sigh escaping her. Her front paw reached out, gently brushing the shell and sea glass, as if touching them could summon the ones she missed most.

The brook was a welcome companion, its sound drowning out the otherwise heavy silence. She kept it to her left as she strolled, paw steps slow, but steady, moving her along downstream. If the brook was large enough, she could have fished; it would have certainly been more convenient than finding something amongst the dense forest floor. 

The denseness soon parted and before her lay a lone wolf, the same she had seen earlier, chasing after another as she apologized. Her pawsteps stopped a few feet away from the girl, head cocked as her eyes looked over the other. She appeared sadly caressing items that seemed to glitter with the light reflecting from the nearby water.

Solenya leaned back and sat carefully on her haunches, a clearing of the throat erupting from her to signal her presence.

Those items are very beautiful. Her words were as soft as a flower petal, delicate as not to startle the other.

It took several moments for Kirain to register that someone was there, let alone speaking to her.

Huh?

Her dulled silver eyes lifted slowly, landing on the stranger. Ah… hello.

Silence lingered as her mind caught up, thoughts sluggish from exhaustion and ache. Then, quietly: Gifts from friends… meant for brighter futures. Funny, isn’t it?

A faint, bitter smile flickered across her face before fading. Her ears pinned back as she remained motionless, curled where she lay by the river’s edge.

I—uh… I’m Kirain. Am I trespassing? Her voice softened. I can leave, if I am.

She couldn’t, not truly. But she wasn’t looking to cause trouble. She was just so tired. So achingly tired, in a way that no amount of rest could mend.

Tail wagging, she responded, Hello to you.

She stood, coming a little closer, but still keeping her distance as she approached the bank. Her body was loose, hoping it read to the other that she was nothing to be afraid of, or a threat to run from. Bending, she place a paw into the cool water, then another until both feet were planted. It felt wonderful, her paws ached with her recent travel around the borders.

Her ears swiveled as she caught the female’s explanation and subsequent question of trespass. Craning her neck, she looked to her with a slight shake of her head. I find the idea beautiful. And, no, you are not trespassing. The Viridian Sanctum is happy you are here. And so am I.

I am Solenya. This forest has become my home, slow but steady. I was just out looking for something to hunt before I came upon you. Might you be hungry? We could look for something together, if you’d like. She offered the girl a welcoming smile.

Solenya is a beautiful name. Thank you for your kindness.

A gentle wave of relief passed through her. She wasn’t in hostile territory, and for once, that was enough to ease the tightness in her chest. Far too often, she’d wandered into places where cold stares and harsh words waited. She was tired of that. So very tired.

An invitation to hunt?

The offer rang strangely familiar, echoing somewhere deep within her. A memory stirred, him. And just like that, the fragile light she’d been clinging to flickered… and dimmed.

Ah… I’m afraid I’d only slow you down, she admitted, her voice soft with self-consciousness. I’ve a terrible habit of ignoring my needs on long travels. I’d be no more help to you than a stumbling pup.

The thought pulled a dry, almost apologetic laugh from her, heat blooming in her chest, not from effort, but from embarrassment.

Thank you. Kirain is even moreso.

She saw the way the tension melted and, for a moment, it seemed the girl would bloom fully. But, the silence lasted too long, and she wilted, the light in her eyes leaving as quickly as it had come.

Solenya’s own face fell into sympathy, verdant eyes meeting silver orbs in a silent giving of strength and understanding. We all have a purpose in life, something useful to offer others. If hunting is not where your gifts lie, that is okay. She left the water then, closing the distance and stopped just short of the trinkets that sat in the dirt before the white female.

Give me a moment, let me find something for you.

She left then, her paw steps silent as she disappeared over a fallen log.

—————————————

Off in the distance, there was a squeal, a scuffle—then silence. Solenya returned, a river otter clutched in her teeth. The poor thing had been caught traveling through the underbrush, trying to make its way to water.

Reaching Kirain, she plopped the carcass down, carefully avoiding the gifts. Please, she nosed the carcass, eat. It is not much, but it’ll do for now.

Another trip to the bank, she dipped her paws and wiped her nuzzle free of the otter’s blood. 

Guilt, deep and unbidden, pooled in her stomach. She wasn’t doing her part, and she hated herself for it. Solenya was so kind, kinder than Kirain ever deserved. She wanted to reach out, to stop her, but the words caught in her throat, refusing to rise.

When the she-wolf returned, tears welled in Kirain’s eyes. No. Not again. The scene was achingly familiar, a mirror of a memory that tore her already-wilted soul in two. Why? Why must she show such kindness? Just like he had. Damn it all.

But she didn’t say any of that.

Instead, her voice trembled, soft and broken.
Thank you, Solenya... That was so kind of you. Are—are you sure? I’m responsible for myself. If you're hungry, you should enjoy the fruits of your labor, not me.

quick phone post! Sorry for length!

Solenya saw the unshed tears that threatened to spill. Returning to the wilted white lily, she clucked her tongue, a paw reaching to cup the girl’s cheek. 

Unaware to the true reason for them, she assumed they were because she was not eating. Come now, Kirain. I will be fine. There’s no need to fret. Enjoy. Please.

It was true, the Viridian Sanctum will provide  in time. She will find sustenance soon. But here, in this moment with Kirain, seemed more pressing.

No worries <3 I appreciate your replies! Your writing is so lovely

The gentle touch of a paw against her cheek shattered her composure. Unbidden tears slipped free as she turned away from Solenya, shame burning hot beneath her skin. Her gaze fell to the otter, and beside it, the only treasures she had left. The sight undid her completely.

A soft, broken sob escaped her lips, one she tried, and failed, to stifle. She had never been any good at hiding her feelings. Her heart was always on display, vulnerable and unguarded.

And now, here she was, breaking down in front of a stranger over food.

She winced. No... not just food.

A future, gone before it had even begun. Hope, stolen without warning. A quiet resentment stirred in her chest, threatening to spill over.

Kirain shook her head, forcing herself to breathe, to pull herself back together. There was still so much to be grateful for. Now was not the time to fall apart.

Th-thank you, she whispered, voice trembling. Forgive me.

And here I am admiring yours! <33

Kirain’s tears began to flow, and Solenya’s heart broke, the pieces falling with them. Part of her was afraid that she had overstepped, but a bigger part of her recognized a hurting heart.

Shh…there is nothing to forgive. Kirain, what has you so upset? Surely it can’t be because of the otter? If it were, she would try to understand, but she couldn’t wrap around crying over food. There had to be so much more to this.

Talk with me while you eat. Settling herself down, she looked to Kirain, ears focused on her, ready to listen if she chose to speak of what has her so upset.

Kirain felt like a fool. Here she was, blubbering like an idiot while Solenya was only trying to be kind. The embarrassment clung to her, hot and suffocating, and she wished she could simply melt into the earth like snow beneath the first warmth of spring.

A choked laugh slipped out, brittle and humorless. She drew in a deep breath, trying to steady herself.

No... it’s not the otter. Not really. Her voice trembled, threaded with the ache of memory. This whole situation, it reminds me of something. A similar mistake I made many moons ago.

She paused, lips pressing into a thin line, and gave her head a frustrated shake.

I pushed my body too far, too fast. I was exhausted, half-starved. Then a kind man found me. And instead of taking advantage of my weakness... he fed me. Protected me.

Her gaze dropped to the otter. Carefully, she reached out and opened its belly with a claw, mimicking a gesture from the past, one etched into her bones.

We became inseparable, she murmured. He had these grand plans... beautiful hopes and dreams. And I followed him. I trusted him with everything I had.

Her voice faltered, caught between the weight of remembrance and fresh pain.

And then, one day…

She fell quiet. The silence hung heavy between them before she finished in a whisper, barely audible:

He abandoned me.

Solenya listened attentively, silently taking in all that Kirain let spill from her lips. To be abandoned is a terrible thing, regardless of the reason. The willow woman had felt the same when her parents had passed, wondering if she had done something wrong, something to cause them to take their last breaths as they slept. 

And when her siblings disappeared, had she done something to split them up? Being the oldest born, she had been the one to make the final decision on what they would hunt, or where they would travel, which paths to take. Could one decision have been the catalyst?

For many moons, she struggled with anger, with feelings of loss and abandonment. How could her parents leave their children to fend for themselves? How could they leave her to lead her siblings when her decision to move through a previously dried ravine during a heavy rainstorm cause them to become separated as it flooded, never to see them again?

She took in a breath, letting the air of the forest fill her lungs, her body calming from thoughts of her family. I, too, know of abandonment. I am so so sorry that you have had to go through this loss. She had moved then, to pick a lily from the riverbank, and returned to Kirain’s side.

She tucked a paw under the girl’s chin, to raise Kirain’s eyes to her own, placing the lily on one ear. But, know this, Kirain—we are not responsible for what happens to those we care about. Some things are out of our control. It is not because of you, or anything that you did. Life has its reasons, has its plans for each and every being on this earth.

She listened in silence as Solenya spoke, feeling a little foolish for crying over an otter and all it had come to represent. Yet, there was comfort in her words, gentle, grounding. Kirain exhaled a soft, shaky sigh, giving a small nod before lifting a paw to wipe at her eyes.

I... I know, she murmured. It’s the cycle of life, the give and take. But knowing that doesn’t make it hurt any less. I understand I’m not in control. I do. I was just... so happy. And to have that stolen away... Her voice faltered, and she let out a tired, breathy laugh. I suppose I resent it, in some small, stubborn way.

Her gaze flicked to the flower Solenya had tucked gently behind her ear. Kirain was curious, what kind of flower it was, what it meant, but she didn’t dare disturb it. The delicate beauty perched atop someone like her? It felt undeserved. And yet... a strange, unexpected lightness stirred within her.

Feel your feelings, Kirain, but as life moves on, so must you. It is time for you to make your own happiness. Offering a smile, she patted the girl’s cheek. She stood then, staring out into the forest, feeling the wind stir her fur gently, listening to the sounds of her new home.

I want to ask you something. Her words were directed to the lily girl, yet her gaze seemed far away, something ancient and vibrant stirring in her viridian eyes. Would you like to call this place, this Viridian Sanctum, home? To tend to the earth beneath your paws, to give your past to the earth and bloom anew?

To give my past to the earth? Her voice carried a thread of curiosity as she watched Solenya. Though she stood before her, Solenya felt distant, present in body, but somewhere far away in spirit. Kirain's brow furrowed.

What do you mean? she asked, confused but open, trying to grasp the weight of the words. To create her own happiness. To have a home. The thoughts stirred something deep within her, a place untouched by the grief and hardship she'd grown so used to.

I... I don't know if I have anything worth offering to the Viridan Sanctum, she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. I'm a half-trained healer and mediocre at everything else. I'd hate to become a burden.

Saying it aloud hurt. Part of her didn’t believe the words, but still, she felt compelled to say them, as though Solenya deserved a warning.

Kirain was curious, receptive, and that made Solenya’s heart glad. What you offer may be something physical, like an item, or non-physical, like words of your past, to plant into the earth, so our guardians, she paused to arch a paw at the trees above, will keep them safe. As you build your life within the pack, your future will bloom.

It was a simple thing, a small ceremony to become one with the Sanctum, with the pack. 

I do not believe in burdens; we are all spokes on the wheel of time. Some of us are broken from the weight of that wheel, but we all can be repurposed into something useful. If you choose to stay, and want to continue your training as a healer, I will assist you to achieve that. 

She did not have the means herself to teach Kirain, but she could seek out the neighboring packs to find someone who would be willing.

She would need to hear Kirain’s decision first.

Kirain was silent for several long moments, her thoughts churning like a storm cloud in her mind. To be accepted. To be at peace. To start anew.
She wanted it, desperately.
But did she deserve it?

Frustration simmered beneath her skin. Maybe she wasn’t deserving yet, but she could become so. She would earn it. She could carve out her place here, in Viridian Sanctum. She could be useful, in whatever way she was able.
Nothing was stopping her now. She had nothing left to lose.

Drawing in a deep breath, Kirain pushed aside the objects in front of her and began to claw at the dirt. Her muscles ached, her limbs heavy with exhaustion, but she was determined. Slowly, steadily, a modest hole took shape beneath her paws.

She paused, eyes drifting to the sea glass and shell, fragments of futures that never came to be. With tender care, she placed them into the hollow and covered them with the dirt she’d unearthed.

When it was done, she turned to Solenya, her voice soft but sure.
I want to start again.

She stood there in silence, watching Kirain disturb the sod to place her trinkets. Wind blew through the canopy above, leaves rustling while some came loose to cascade down around the two. Solenya smiled, a hum of approval deep in her throat.

Then, come. Gesturing for the girl to follow, she turned to face deeper into the Sanctum. We have much to do, my lily girl.

Despite herself, Kirain rose to her feet.
She wouldn’t be a burden. That much, she would make certain of.

This was a chance, a fragile, flickering thing, for something new.
For hope.
For a home.

Silently, she followed Solenya, her thoughts turning inward, heavy with possibility and the weight of all that might come next.