Broken Boulder used to know - Printable Version

set immediately after this thread. @Alarian

He had first had merely walked away from the scene and then it transpired into a brisk jog which quickly turned into a run. The wolfdog wanted to get as far away from the lady with the bad questions, he had moved through the territory trying to avoid anyone who may stop him for conversation or more questioning.

But he could only get so far without leaving the territory and while he was very obviously distressed, he didn't want to leave the Sanctuary's confines.

Finally, he found a place a place to tuck himself away from any prying eyes. Eyes. Suddenly the bad feeling was back full force again. He paced for a few moments before he lowered himself down to the earth a soft whine escaping him.

He couldn't have known that anything was plaguing his friend, but he sought his company anyway. For more selfish reasons, perhaps. Alarian didn't linger on how long it took to find his friend, nor the fact that he almost seemed to be hiding when he found him— well, he didn't linger on it at first. He paused in his brisk approach as he realized not all was well with the wolfdog, slowing to a stop and chuffing uncertainly.
The Governor wondered then at Ulf's elusiveness, at his prone position. He wondered if someone had hurt him— physically or otherwise. His jaw tightened at the thought, and he inched forward. Ulf? Alarian called softly, unwilling to draw too near in case it would be unwelcome. He lowered his own body, as had become habit around the wolfdog, and waited anxiously for an answer.

Had it been anyone else, Ulf surely would have given them a defensive greeting of teeth but it wasn't anyone else. It was Alarian. The wolfdog wasn't sure how to greet him and the unease that once sat in his stomach seemed to spread to his chest. He made sure to hide his face with his paws in hopes it would keep the kind gold-kissed male from seeing the wrong.

At that moment, the canine only wanted to burrow into the earth like some kind of mole and hide in order to shield the wolves of the Sanctuary from him.

He frowned, chest tightening as he watched Ulf hide his face. Now he was more certain that something had happened, but— what? Alarian remembered he had made sure to inform the members of the presence of a dog in their ranks— surely no one in the Sanctuary would dare hurt him...
Ulf? Alarian crept closer and tried again. What's wrong? Did something happen? Did someone hurt you? The concern was evident in his voice, but beyond that, distress— he had taken the male in, had promised him protection. If Ulf had been hurt under his care...

He knew he couldn't stay silent with his face down, breathing in the dirt of the earth. Not when Alarian said his name again. The word wrong appeared again and made his paws briefly press tightly against his face. Ever so carefully he peeled his paws away from his face before closing his eyes tightly.

"Pale...pale stranger." He spoke softly. "Asked what wrong with my eye." His tones conveyed his distress with the situation. Ulf had no idea if he was being reasonable about the situation but he didn't particularly care. She had come from nowhere and questioned something he never knew. Technically he knew but it seemed natural, not wrong. His eyes were all he had ever known and suddenly there was something wrong with them.

He opened his blue eyes, seeking the face of Alarian. "What's wrong?" Ulf asked softly referencing his eyes although he hadn't been able to convey it in the best manner.

Alarian watched Ulf carefully, inching closer still; he stopped at his words. Suddenly his throat felt thick, hearing what had happened. He was relieved that his friend hadn't been physically hurt, but—
He knew how words could hurt, too.
The boy considered it could have been Korei, as oblivious and tactless as she was— likely not Liri, he thought. He regarded Ulf with soft eyes for several beats. Oh, Ulf— I think you're blind in one eye, Alarian told him gently, drawing nearer and pressing his muzzle to the wolfdog's neck if he was allowed. He continued more softly, It looks a little different, but— your eyes are beautiful, and so are you.
For once, he felt no embarrassment as the words slipped from him. Assuming Ulf had not pulled away from his touch, he trailed his nose through the plush of his friend's fur up to his cheek, then broke the contact. Alarian drew back just far enough to meet the other male's gaze. He hadn't been lying; his friend was beautiful.

blame any typos on my tears over alarian

The words of blindness were news to him when they shouldn't have been. Ulf never knew that not everyone had the same kind of messed-up vision but it made sense when he thought back on it. Suddenly he felt very dumb — sad and dumb.

His lips stayed sealed as he let Alarian grace him with his touch. Ulf dared to lean into it briefly before the sensation was gone. His head slowly turning to look towards the wolf. He always had such kind things to say, didn't he? The canine was far too blessed to have met such a caring creature in the wild.

If allowed, Ulf aimed to put his face into the ruffled coat of the Governor's neck. "Beautiful." He murmured softly. The words did not magically heal Ulf's feelings from the incident but well, the thought that Alarian saw nothing wrong made the situation a little more bearable.

He swallowed hard when he felt Ulf press into his neck, leaning his head down to embrace him. Alarian was no stranger to the ignorance of dogs— they all seemed perpetually young. Perhaps it was cruel to think of them that way; as somehow less aware than his own kind. But what could be equal that, by its nature, could never truly be independent?
So it had not startled him that his friend did not realize his own handicap— it had not startled him when the other had seemed so confused in the middle of the pack's territory.
That Ulf sought his touch startled him. Alarian absently began to preen at the fur between the base of the wolfdog's skull and the back of his neck, masking the fact that he was quickly working himself into a panic over it. Already he harbored affection for his new friend— but he did not think the wolfdog would ever understand it, and more than anything he feared the budding affection becoming more than just that.

He stayed still through all the preening, soaking in Alarian's scent. It was comforting and served as a reminder that the wild wasn't as terrible as he had been told it was as a child. He had just learned there were a few bad faces but certainly not all were bad. Bad faces didn't care for you like he had been cared for already in such a small window of time.

"Alarian." Ulf spoke the name delicately into the fur of the wolf. He was not particularly sure why he spoke the name but it felt right at the moment. Perhaps speaking his name would make the feelings of comfort last longer.

Hearing his name was— it was too much. A weak shudder ran down his spine, and involuntarily he pressed a bit closer. Alarian had noted in himself time and time again a tendency to fall into these things too quickly; he had never been able to fix this particular flaw. A pretty face, a few kind words— god forbid anyone give him any attention. He might have worn his heart on his sleeve if it ever stayed in his possession long enough.
And just like that, he was drowning again in feelings that were familiar but always so strange to him. It was different— but the same, somehow. The same flicker of infatuation, but as with every individual who caught his eye, he saw different things in Ulf than in anyone before him.I— Whatever he had been about to say melted away before he could begin. He sucked in a breath, suddenly feeling vulnerable and afraid, but was rooted to the spot.
His only comfort was in the warmth of Ulf pressing against him.

The longer he lingered in the fur of Alarian, soaked in the attention of the caring gold-kissed wolf, the less he wanted to leave. He'd tie himself to the male if it meant not having to be alone or facing the wilds again. Home could wait as long as the Sanctuary was here.

The small word stirred him from his thoughts, ears perking as he debated on pulling his face out of the ruffled fur. It seemed like an undesirable act. "I?" He asked softly, only pulling far enough away to be heard but still close enough for the fur of his face and Alarian's neck to mingle.

He no longer felt bad about crowding the male and as such, he likely wouldn't ever be very far from him now.

Ulf questioned him, and he paused; he had expected it, but could no longer recall the answer. Several beats of silence passed. He was searching for the words he wanted— for the feeling he wanted to express. It became clear to him all at once.
I don't want you to leave, The words came in a breathless rush, perhaps unexpected in the context but not to him. Everyone left him eventually. Alarian was sick of losing those he cared for— he was tired of being alone. He had stopped running; why couldn't everyone else? His lungs felt constricted again as he realized the truth of his own words. The wolfdog may have been an unwelcome surprise in his home, but now— now Alarian hoped desperately that he could keep him.

He smiled — even if the sight of it might be lost due to the angle of their heads — at the words Alarian spoke. It was with tender care that he settled his head back down against the wolf's fur. "No leaving." He had no want to leave. There were feelings he felt here that he had never felt back home and they weren't bad feelings. In fact, they were rather nice feelings that the wolfdog couldn't name.

"Stay here." Ulf spoke the words in hopes to disperse any worries the Governor might have had leftover after his first words. The canine had no intentions of going back on his word either. Of course, only time would be able to truly prove that.

Others before Ulf had assured him of the same thing, but somehow, it still felt genuine. Alarian relaxed as he felt his friend settle back against him, as he listened to him speak. Good, He breathed, leaning to draw his tongue over the wolfdog's ear. In that moment, he forgot his worries surrounding the new feelings; he forgot his fear, the fact that he was being an idiot and rushing in again, the ache that told him he still wasn't quite over Lennon yet anyway— none of it mattered then.
All that mattered was that Ulf would stay, that he wanted to be near him. Perhaps this would turn out different than the times before. And even if it didn't, Ali was five seconds in and already too far gone to care.