Nerain had been sleeping in her rock tent den, this one had been much easier to make then the one at the ridge. she had been quite impressed with herself. But this day she was sleeping in the very back having rolled there after some particularly vidvid dreams, and one that confused her to the core.

A howl broke the air and Nerian shot up only thump her skull into the ceiling of her den and fall back down abruptly cursing odin.... what? odin?... The howl continued it called her name. Was it time for morning prayers, 5 more minutes...

Nerian eyes widened this was not the temple.... and northumbria, this was well this was... the back of her crude paw made den... She shook her head and frowned then glanced up at the ceiling over her head, how'd she get this far tucked back into the den. ARAH!! the drying herbs ruined!

Nerian scrambled from the den, it was not morning... half the day was already gone.... someone must have noticed her lack of border patrol and her stomach growled loudly having not been fed in a long time. Nerian tipped her ears toward the howl, curses it stopped where was it coming from....

haaaa... she hissed to herself, finding her throat sore she must have been whining in her sleep again. She waited for another howl but it didn't come and her throat was to sore the Howl back, This was not a good day so far... Nerian sighed, The plants would need watering by now She returned to her Den and grabbed her conch shell in her jaw the pointed tips of the shell were chewed on just a tiny bit so that water would run slowly out of it, a crude watering can.

Nerian trotted toward the garden keeping her, unwittingly toward the wolf whom had called her, As she see Thistle her heart rate picked up, she felt butterflies in her stomach, but why.... This was Thistle Cloud not the Thistle God right?? Nerain slowed down and set the conch shell gently on the ground not wanting to damage her new tool.

Nerian ever careful keep her face kind and yet neutral Hello Thistle She offered her voice friendly and only slightly scratchy

Nerian leaned her cheek into Thistles nudge and smiled softly, Female attention was something she understood, and appreciated. Having been surround by only females her whole life, this is until Ragnar, Nerian missed her sisters, missed the love that they shared and missed the company of sleeping together, Her den though proud she was of it was so very lonely.
Nerian was surprised by this realization, that the reason she was so hurt by the 'strange' animosity that hung between she and Thistle was not that Thistle wouldn't share Ragnar was that Thistle wasn't sharing herself.

Nerian's eyes flitted over Thistle's body as she looked at Thistle with new eyes, eyes that saw her as a 'sister' as a comrade as a companion. Companionship not sexually no that wasn't allowed but everything else....

Thistle began to speak and Nerian endeavoured to listen. Nerian murmured softly and dropped her head I'm sorry Thistle but, you are not selfish.. you can been nothing but selfless... Thistle Cloud was a wolf to aspire to, a wolf that would be a hard act to follow, her paws were to large to fill in her wake.

Thsitle continued to speak and Nerain froze, still as a statue her mouth parted, her eyes on Thistles chest until she had stopped speaking. Only then did Nerian lifted her gaze to Thistles open mouth her tongue peeking out over her teeth, as exhausted from speaking as Nerian herself got. Nerian swooned a little... Oh this day just keeps getting better Nerian muttered her tone bespoke of exasperation, not joy.

Nerian need a moment to herself, she picked up the conch shell and and moved to the water dipping it below the surface filling it. After which she returned and walked the dripping shell along the first row of plants, allowing time for water to run out and water the plants on both sides of the rows. Carefully setting the shell down in the row where she stood she turned and admired Thistle Cloud for a moment before she walked back over to Thistle and ran her body along Thistle's side. Nerian rested her muzzle below Thistles chin for a moment.

You will be welcomed into haven for your selfless deeds and I to hell for my selfish ones. Nerian lifted her head and licked Thistle cheek softly and tenderly, a kiss not submission, Can we take it Day by Day? Could we try our out relationship first before Ragnar bulldozes in. Or did you discuss this with him first?
Nerian didn't want to hide a relationship from Ragnar but she didn't want him eyeing their every move either. Plus she realized she might just love Thistle more, she just needed time to prove it.

Nerian paused when Thistles teeth touched her ruff, Nerian was reminded of Ragnar's strength when he had rebuked her. But this wasn't like that, this was different, warmer she found she liked this much better.

Do not worry about my title anymore Thistle, I do not, they are but words thrust upon others Though that was far from what Nerian truly thought she did not want to cause anymore strife between a woman and her husband. Ragnar would release her when he deemed her worthy,
That and if Ragnar never did free her from the chain of that label. The title of "slave' might yet save her soul one day; that is if she was prepared to die when Ragnar did... Nerian's thoughts flitted to the ceremony of the slave whom choose to die with her master so that she may stay at her master's side in Valhalla, it still left her very conflicted but was it a way to not go to hell or be left in purgatory...
It chilled her to the bone to be thinking that way, with the title she could go to Valhalla at Ragnar's side and remain a slave for all eternity, without the title she 'may' go into heaven though these thoughts were so selfish she felt 'heaven' slipping further away. Then she found her thoughts drifting toward weither or not Freya would even accept a former slave as a valid wife?

Nerian moved around to face Thistle and laughed softly allowing to smile to reach her eyes, finally dropping her emotional facade. Thistle, trying to hold Ragnar at bay is like trying to stop a water fall with pebbles. Nerian looked proud of herself for coming up with what she felt was an apt adage of Ragnar.

Nerain opened her mouth to speak Thistle I have never been sure of what I wanted since I was taken from my home, but one thing I have come to realize over these past few days is I would rather share you... and Ragnar not just him. but these words did not flow out of her she was so so very afraid to loose what small ground she had just been blessed with. Though the thought of suddenly getting Ragnar scared her,
'be careful what you wish for' she heard in in minds ear with a sing song voice.
With a pause hanging in the air Nerian had to speak if you are both welcome to the idea, let's let it flow like water down the river and see where this new journey takes us Surprised she pulled that out of thin air, You have nothing to fear Thistle I know first hand how much he loves you and If he only loved me a quarter that much I would die a happy wolf

Nerian filed away the comments about Thistles pups and their parentage she had heard rumours and she knew that though Ragnar loved the children he would always wonder. It was no wonder that Thistle guarded Ragnar's heart.

Nerians breath hitched, Thistle knew, she knew... but would she reciprocate? Nerian regarded her for a moment tried to decide if Thistle knew or not... I have a question ... but I am afraid to ask it... Nerian stepped forward and pressed her neck against Thistle's afraid to look into her eyes, Neiran spoked softly her muzzle just behind Thistle's ear anyway Does Ragnar mind sharing you? Nerian squeezed her eyes shut then and drew a breath holding it her chest reflexively. If Thistle moved away from her and spurned her as Ragnar had over and over she'd probably collapse under the weight of her selfishness.

She didn't ask if Ragnar actually wanted her for she feared that he didn't; nothing he had done so far had showed her otherwise, but if Thistle was asking her these things did it mean that at least Thistle wanted her? Did some one actually think she was worthy of affection? The seconds felt like hours to Nerian her heart thrummed in her ears and legs got weaker.

Nerian's breath froze in her throat, and she grabbed up her Emotional face mask again and placed it upon her grey and white face, stilling her body so as to not portray her absolute confusion. Thistle spoke like she didn't want anything with her, like that was a thought that hadn't come to her mind before now.... So where then was all this coming from. Nerian had called Thistle unhappy but never once had she said at least to thistle that she wanted Ragnar as well

Nerian felt like she was in a dream again, none of this made sense to her. She had explained her feelings to Ragnar when she first arrived she had even asked Ragnar to take her, over and over actually, but he had made it clear didn't love her that he loved Thistle. The only thing Ragnar had ever showed Nerian was a confusing mix of stay close but stay away....

At last Thistle gave Nerian something to focus on besides Ragnar and the oddity of this conversation, though Nerian had agreed to take it day by day she was very unsure of what it was that was expected of her from this point forth.
Yes my sisters and I were all 'in sync' off by less then a week. Our temple had the blue herb, that I can't remember the name of for the life me, shipped in a week before our heats began and we ate them for two weeks, along with our regular food I have never been in heat before this year. Nor have I been around another female in heat. What ever the herb is it is native to northumbria. I can not find it here.

Nerian chuffed Pass the blue.... she smiled then, just before her eyes twitched away the sting of unfallen tears and her neutral expression took hold again. That was the saying at the supper time meal
Nerian sighed, Thistle I think I need to be alone for a time.... but Nerian didn't move to leave incase Thistle had more to add.

As Thistle turned to leave Nerian reached out and brushed her muzzle against against Thistle's hip, licking her tail as Thistle moved away. Don't be mad, one day at a time...

Nerian stood then and moved back toward her den, the drying herbs needed to be tended the ones that could be salvaged anyway... she'd come back toward evening to finish watering the plants here. Right now she wanted to think, she needed time to process things, even though thinking about her feeling was something she had tried hard to avoid lately, maybe she needed to mediate and not think of anything for a while.